Throw me a lifeline
by Gunni11
Summary: a Charlie/Joey story, starting on the day of the Courtcase
1. Chapter 1

_I've taken the title from a Blanche Dubois song "Lifeline" from the album "Things we never say" Parts of the song goes like this: " I promise you this: it's you I've been search for, It's you, the one that I need. Throw me a lifeline of new beginning."_

_The story is set three months after Joey discovers that Charlie slept with Hugo, starting on the day of the court case against Robbo._

Joey sat in the car, nervously playing with the hem of her jacket. Morag had made her dress up for the trial. It was nice of Charlie to arrange for Morag to be her layer, knowing how much stress she had dealing with the Alzheimer of Charlie's father.

Charlie, a familiar pain filled her heart. A Pain that had become a part of her life, the only thing that told her she was still alive. She couldn't stop thinking about her. Three months had passed since the awful day she had discovered it… Charlie with Hugo… She couldn't comprehend it. She ran. Ran away from Charlie, from the love of her life, from the feeling that was nearly as bad as when Robbo...

* * *

The day had come, tears started running down her cheeks, it seemed to be the only thing she could do these days. Days… it had been three months, three terrible months, three months in hell. Why had she done it, why had she slept with Hugo. She hadn't found a satisfying answer, just excuses. None of them good enough to justify what she had done.

Today she was going to see her again. See Joey. She felt excitement running down her spine, closely followed by anxiety. She closed her eyes and all she could see was the face of Joey as she asked if it was true. The hurt in her face was the same as when she had opened up to Charlie and told her about Robbo.

They died that day. Joey had flung her arms around her, holding her tight, kissed her, not with the familiar passion and love, but with desperation and hurt. Crushing her against the fridge, "what can he give you that I can't? I thought you loved me." Joey's voice had been trembling, begging, and demanding answers.

"Nothing" Charlie whispered "nothing" The handle of the fridge was pressing painfully into her back, but it couldn't drown out the pain she was feeling over what she had done. "I don't know why I did it" Tears streaming down her face, holding on to Joey just as hard as Joey was holding her.

"Why didn't you talk to me? I know what Brett did freaked you out, that you wasn't ready for the whole world to know. Why didn't you just talk to me?" Joey was trembling. Pressing her body even tighter to Charlie. Knowing this was the last time, knowing that she had lost her. She held her for a long time. Charlie felt the life leave Joeys body.

"You just killed me." Joey's voice was lifeless. She kissed her again, possessing her, invading her mouth. Charlie felt the passion and love rise in her. Causing more tears to run down her face. She felt that this was goodbye. Then Joey left.

The thoughts about that day overwhelmed her. She sank to the floor with the back against her bed. The back that had hurt for weeks after being crushed into the fridge, causing a bruise with the size of Queensland. But she had loved that bruise, it was the last thing she had left from Joey.

Waking up from her thoughts, she realized that she had been lost far too long, she had to hurry to make it to the courthouse in time.

A sharp knock on the door and Ruby put her head in, "we have to go, get ready all right!" Charlie couldn't answer, standing with the back to her sister she gave a short nod. Ruby, picking up on her mood, slipped into the room, closing the door, and put her arms around her waist. Leaning her head against her shoulder, she felt her sister shaking from crying. It was a familiar thing. It seemed that since Joey left all her sister could do was cry. Cry, drink and work. Ruby was hurting for her, but she didn't know what else to do than letting her know that she was there for her, whenever Charlie let her, which wasn't too often.

"Let me help you get ready" Ruby offered. Charlie nodded grateful for the help. This day was too hard to get through without any support. "Thank you Rubs" She whispered.

* * *

Arriving at the courthouse, Joey didn't know what to do with herself. When she had pressed charges Charlie had promised that she would be there all of the way. Would she be here? Did she hate her? She had left without giving Charlie any chance to explain. She had killed her that day, and Joey wanted to hurt her back. She had stormed out of the kitchen, through the windows she had seen Charlie collapse on the floor, screaming after her. All she wanted to was to turn back, gather her in her arms, saying that it would be OK.

She couldn't, the hurt was too deep, the betrayal too huge. She couldn't. She had given everything to Charlie, and this was the thanks? She ran, she couldn't turn back.

"Are you OK?" Morag's voice jolted her back to the present. "You look very nice, I'm glad you dressed up, it gives a good impression on the court." Morag looked up and down her figure, grateful that the girl had taken her advice and put on something else than the oversized gray sweater she'd worn on all the occasions she had met her. She looked surprisingly good, sweet, innocent and young. That would help her case, give her sympathy with the judge. Morag was pleased, but worried a little over the lack of life in her eyes. She had talked to her about the rape and the incident when Robbo tried to drown her. She had talked about the facts, but never about the feelings. Morag wanted her to open up, but she hadn't been able to reach in. she wouldn't reveal more than what was needed for the case.

Joey gave her a faint smile back. She hadn't dressed up for the court, she had dressed up for Charlie. The thought of maybe seeing her again filled her with something she hadn't felt for months, three months. Feeling blood rushing to her cheeks, it quickly left again with the thought "What if she's not here, what if she hates me?"

She hadn't given her a chance. After a while, she had realized why Charlie had slept with Hugo. She just didn't understand why she had done it to her. After leaving Charlie, she had gotten a job on a trawler up the coast, thinking that the sea would bring her peace, as it had always done in the past. This time it didn't, but it gave her time to think.

She realized that she had forgotten how quickly it all had happened. Charlie still confused about who she was, not wanting the whole world to know. Then Brett had painted "queer" on her car for the whole world to see. She freaked out, got overly drunk and slept with him.

She wasn't ready to tell. They should have gone away for that weekend after the night in the car. That would have given them time, given her time to be more comfortable with what she was feeling. Then maybe it would be easier to face the world.

She had wanted to go back to Charlie every day since she left, but she couldn't. The hurt was to deep, and then the fear for Charlie hating her for leaving. But today was the day. She had dressed up to impress Charlie, wanting to look good for her. Was there a chance for them?

* * *

Charlie was sitting on the first bench, right behind where she knew Joey would sit. She was nervously shifting positions, slightly trembling from nervousness, fiddling with her shirtsleeve. Ruby was sitting on her right side, Leah on the other. They wanted to be there to support Joey, Charlie was not the only one missing her, Joey had become a good friend to both Leah and Ruby. Also they wanted to be there for Charlie.

Ruby and Leah had talked many a time about Charlie, concerned about her state of mind. Worrying about the way she behaved, driving herself to the brink of exhaustion at work, drinking herself into a stupor at night, and in between crying her heart out. They tried to talk to her, but most of the time not knowing what to say. They knew what she had done, they couldn't say it was going to be OK, they had no way of knowing. All they could do was be there for her, sometimes holding her for hours while she sobbed, often until she cried herself to sleep. It was painful to witness.

Both Ruby and Leah saw that Charlie was on the breaking point now. They didn't know what would happened, but they wanted to be there to support her.

Charlie felt a small hand covering her own fiddling hands, her sister had reached over, trying to settle her nervous motions. She glanced over at her, giving her a half smile, Ruby squeezing her hands in return. Charlie could hardly control herself. Joey hated her, how could she ever forgive her. The pain she had caused her, she had to hate her. She had wanted to go after Joey every day after that awful day, but the thought of Joey rejecting her, throwing in her face how much she hated her… she couldn't handle that.

Suddenly the door to the courtroom opened, Charlie threw her head up. Morag was entering the room, professional as always, giving Charlie a short nod. But behind her she came… Charlie choked when she saw her. She had never looked so beautiful. She had dressed up, high heels, a black pencil skirt that ended just above her knees. On top a cute, pale pink shirt, the top tree buttons open, reviling some of her tender skin. A black jacket hanging over her arm.

Charlie teared up at the sight. She looked so lovely, but at the same time, she noticed that Joey had lost weight and looked totally unhappy. She looked young, innocent and vulnerable. Charlie had to muster all her self-control to stop herself from jumping up, gather her in her arms and protect her. Erase all the pain she had caused, kissing her deeply as she had dreamt of every day for the last three months. Again tasting her sweet lips, drowning in the love that Joey had for her… Had…

Joey could hardly stand upright, her knees turned to gel as she felt someone looking at her, not someone, Charlie. She knew long before she raised her eyes from the floor she had intently studied on her way into the courtroom. Meeting her eyes, she felt herself melt, just wanting to run into her arms, feeling the security she always used to feel in her arms.

She looked awful though. She always used to look beautiful, no matter what she had on, or hadn't on, she was the most beautiful woman in the world. She was still the most beautiful creation Joey had ever seen, but her always shiny hear had lost its shine. She had dark rings under her eyes and she had lost weight, she looked sick.

Joey was torned away by Morag, who grabbed her in the arm to make her sit down, she stumbled over to her chair, and was just lucky that she hit the seat as her knees gave away, and didn't end up on the floor or something.

Charlie stared at the back of the girl she loved. Sitting there, just about an armlength away, all she had to do was stretch out her arm and touch her. She reached out, stopping half way, resting her arm on the railing that separated them. Open and closing her fist, she hesitated, how would Joey react? She couldn't help herself, she leaned forward and touched her shoulder.

Joey was very aware that Charlie was right behind her. She held on to the chair to stop herself from turning around, Charlie's eyes was burning in her back. Suddenly she felt a hand on her shoulder, a hand she knew, she would recognize it even if a thousand hands had touched her. Slowly she turned around, meeting the beautiful eyes of her Love, swimming in tears. She could hardly make out the words she whispered: "I will never hurt you again!"

Charlie felt the shoulder she touched slowly relax, the gorgeous face that she loved slowly turned towards her. She leaned closer and whispered:"I will never hurt you again!"

She had hardly uttered the words before the doors on the other side of the room opened and the figure of a smirking Robbo appeared. She felt Joey freeze under her hand. Robbo made a point of walking as close to her as he could looking down at her, giving her a disgusting smile as if to say, "you'll never win!" Morag flew up ordering the other layer to keep his client in order, just as Joey bent over, desperately grasping for the paper bin and threw up.

Charlie jumped to her feet, wanting to beat the living daylight out of him for what he had done to her. She hated him for hurting Joey, almost taking her away from her. She hated herself for hurting Joey and she projected all of it on Robbo, wanting to beat his smirking face into a pulp, giving him back for what he had done to the woman she loved.

Half the way over the railing, Ruby and Leah grabbed a hold of her, pulling her back, hindering her from doing what she wanted. She twisted and jerked to get out of their grip, but she didn't have any strength to muster so it wasn't too hard for them to hold her.

Joey buried her head in her arms. She threw up in front of the whole courtroom, it was so embarrassing, but she couldn't hold back. Seeing Robbo with that triumphant look just pushed her over the edge. The emotions ran too high to control. Maybe she had just imagined what Charlie said. While struggling to figure out if she had really heard it, Robbo came, it was just too much.

She heard scuffling behind her, Charlie swearing at Robbo and sounding as if she tried to jump the railing. Soft voices from Ruby and Leah urging her to calm down. Which she, by the sound of it, did. Still with her head buried in her arms, a little smiled lurked in the corner of her lips, at least she stilled cared enough to want to protect her.  


* * *

"Calling Joey Collins for witness!" the voice of the Defenders voice beamed across the room. This was it, the moment she had dreaded for almost five months. The moment she had to spill her life out for everyone to hear.

On trembling feet she made her way up to the witness stand. It seemed like the few meters up was as long as miles. Finally up she let her eyes wander over the crowd. Why would so many people be interested in her case? Colleen was there, of course, she couldn't let an opportunity to hear something she could gossip about pas her. Irene was there, she hardly knew her, but she was nice. Aiden was there with Nicole, it was good to see them smiling up at her, nodding their heads just to show that they where there for her.

Brett, she hated him, it was his fault that she had lost Charlie, he was the one writing on her car. She hated him. He would never accept her, he was her only family, supposed to love and support her, instead he ruined her whole life.

And on the first row, Charlie, looking at her with compassion in her eyes. Biting her lips, and beside her Ruby and Leah, who didn't look less nervous.

Charlie hated the Robbo's layer, he tried to twist everything that Joey told into being her fault. Tears were running down Joey's face as she tried to give her side. Charlie wanted to beat the stuffing out of him just as much as she wanted to beat it out of Robbo. How could he do this to her, forcing her to relive every little detail, making it sound as if it was her fault.

Joey wasn't the only one crying, she was too, tears streaming down her cheeks as she heard the story Joey was telling. Feeling every emotion as if it had been done to her. She tried to hide the fact that she was crying her eyes out, thankful that she was seated in the front row with the back to the rest of the crowd. Ruby and Leah tried to comfort her as best they could.

* * *

"So you claim that it wasn't consensual sex with Robbo because you claim to be a lesbian?" of all the terrible things she had to answer, this was the one she dreaded the most. "yes" the word came out barely audible, "yes" she repeated a little louder. Her eyes wandered over to Robbo who sat with his feet stretched out under the desk, arm crossed over his chest and that disgusting smirk on his face. He looked like he'd just won a million dollars.

Then her eyes found Charlie who looked terrible. Tears running down her face, obviously shaken… and scared? Was she afraid that she would out her, reviling their relationship? As if she would do that to her.

She knew as her eyes rested on her, that she still loved her, no matter what. She had ripped her heart out and kept it, she felt her whole life resting in the hands of this woman, the woman who had hurt her like no other. She still loved her.

" I believe that you're just claiming to be gay to get to my client. You wanted to sleep with him, and then you freaked out over it afterwards." The words hit Joey as if they where knifes. She should have known that they would play that card, Robbo had told her brother the same, and he had believed him. "Do you have a girlfriend? Some relationship to show to? Anyone who'll claim they have been with you?"

As the accusations against Joey flew, Morag tried to protest, but they were already out there. Charlie's heart was racing, what would Joey say. She could tell that they had a relationship, a good one, a wonderful one, a relationship she wanted back. she couldn't bring herself to look at Joey as the judge demanded an answer, she studied the tips of her shoes intently. A faint "no" reached her ears, than a little louder, "no."

Charlie looked up, meeting goldenbrown eyes filled with tears. She should have known, Joey would never out her like that. Maybe she still loved her, or at least cared about her.

Laughter reached her from Robbo, he was smiling like a cat just swallowing a mouse. Satisfied, knowing he'd won.

Filled with anger against Robbo, determined not to let him win she stood up calling out "that's not true!" She felt all the eyes in the room focusing on her, people started to whisper among themselves. Morag turned and looked at her in disbelief, Ruby taking her hand and squeezing it.

Her courage fainted, she couldn't believe that she had said it. Then she rose her head and again her eyes met those goldenbrown eyes in the middle of a face filled with surprise. Her jaw had dropped, but slowly her face changed, and a small smile appeared.

Nothing else mattered. Charlie felt her body filling up with love for the woman in front of her. If this was a chance to get her back, she had to take it. People could talk, her family reject her, it didn't matter, all that matter was Joey.

"We were in a relationship," Charlie paused , fixed her eyes on Joey, "We loved each other," she paused again, "I still love her."

The whispers that had filled the room now raised to a roar, the judge hammering the club, calling out "order!" Morag looking as if she had fallen from the moon, but all Charlie could do was look into those wonderful goldenbrown eyes.

Joey couldn't believe what she heard. Never in a million years would she believe that Charlie would stand up for her, not here in court with what felt like all of Summer Bay pressent . And those last four words spinning around in her head: "I still love you"

The courtroom disappeared, the sounds fading away, the sound of the hammer against the wood on the judge's desk was muffled as covered in cotton. All that she could see, all that mattered was those beautiful blue eyes looking at her.

She didn't care what happened around her, she had to be with the person the eyes belonged to. She rose from the chair, making her way down to Charlie.

Charlie saw Joey rise from her stand, heading towards her. Ruby made way for her to pass her, making it easy for her to reach the end of the aisle, reach the person that was coming towards her. Joey stopped a step away from her, looking at her, a little insecure smile playing on the corner of her mouth.

"Don't you hate me?" both uttered the question simultaneously. Charlie looked in her eyes, afraid of the answer, she found the same fear of the answer in her eyes. But also she saw love. Taking a step, closing the gap between them, Joey welcomed her with throwing her arms around her waist. Charlie lifted her hands placing them ever so gently on her face. The face she had missed touching for so long, the face she'd believed she would never touch again.

Unaware of the chaos surrounding her, she leaned in and gave Joey a tender kiss. The feeling of her lips against her own again made her feel as though she'd come home. This was right! She let her lips go, pulling back just so she could look into her eyes, their foreheads resting on eachothers. Staring into her eyes, Charlie whispered "I'm so sor…" She was interrupted by Joeys lips, kissing her shortly, "we can talk about that later!"

Looking into the big, bright blue eyes just centimeters away from hers filled Joey with a peace and joy she hadn't felt since the last time they were standing like this. Charlie kissing her in public told her that all the fears and uncertainty Charlie had before was gone, or at least she ignored them. It told her that she wanted her, wanted to be with her, no matter what people said or meant. Joey couldn't hold back a smile, and lent in to give her another kiss. There would be time to talk later, right now she just wanted to enjoy the sensation of having Charlie so close again.

They were abruptly interrupted by a male hand jerking them apart. Brett looked like he was about to explode, his face bright red, grabbing Joey around the neck he pushed her back. "What the hell do you think you're doing? Have you lost your mind?" He slapped her in the face so hard that she stumbled backwards. It didn't take the guards long to grab him, wrestling him to the floor and handcuff him.

Joey held her hand over the cheek where he had hit her, it wasn't the first time he had hit her, but that he would do it here, she couldn't believe it.

Charlie had been thrown against the railing when Brett had pulled them apart, it had knocked the air out of her. As she tried to catch her breath she saw him hit Joey. If she'd been angry with Robbo before, now it was all directed at Brett, luckily for him he was tackled by the police, or she wouldn't be accountable for her actions. Then all of her focus was shifted over to Joey. She rushed over to her, gathering the shaking body in her arms. "Let's get away from this room, I'll think the court will take a break."

Morag motioned to follow the two girls, but Leah held her back, "just let them go, they need to," Leah said. "But I need to speak with them, this is quite a shock, I never dreamt that Charlie…" Morag was visibly upset. "I know, but let them go, you don't know what they've been through, give them a little space," Leah reasoned with Morag. Morag looking down at her, "Fine" she said, sat down, showing with her body language that it wasn't fine at all.


	2. Chapter 2

Charlie dragged Joey out of the courtroom, she didn't care that the judged tried to regain order in the room, and Morag was shouting after them. She just wanted to get Joey out of there, getting her away from the commotion she'd created.

At the end of the corridor she stopped, turned to Joey who just looked at her with her lips slightly parted and a bright red cheek, burning from the blow Brett had just gave her. Her bottom lip was trembling a little. Charlie couldn't help her, she had to kiss it. She raised one hand up to her neck, feeling Joey flinching as she touched her it, she broke the contact, lifted away the hair to have a look.

Marks from fingers around her neck were appearing, three fingers on one side and the thumb on the other. The sight made Charlie's stomach churn. Brett could have killed her, she could have lost her again. "We have to get that checked out by a doctor," Charlie gently followed the bruises with her fingers. "I'm fine, no worries, we can do that later. I just want to be with you right now." Joey's lips touched her own once again.

Joey couldn't believe that she again sat nuzzled in the arms of the gorgeous woman she loved. Feeling her fingers lightly touching the bruises Brett had left on her replaced the feeling of pain with the tingling feeling Charlie's fingers always used to give her. She had kissed her again. Deep this time, her tongue seeking entrance behind the lips pressed against hers. Charlie willingly let her in, meeting her tongue with her own. Caressing it, seeking into her mouth, exploring as if it was a long lost country, which it was. A Jolt of passion ran through her body, she felt truly alive again.

They had collapsed on the floor in a corner. Charlie with her back against the wall, Joey sideways between her legs. Joey had put her arm around her waist, her head was resting against Charlie's shoulder. She had bent the leg behind her so she could rest comfortably against it. She did, her forehead snuggled into Charlie's neck, inhaling the sweet smell of her. Her arms around her, protecting her, made her feel safe again, as Charlie had always done. She couldn't let her go again.

Tears were again running down her cheeks, but this time out of relief and joy. Resting her head against the wall, she replayed what Joey had just said to her. "I will never let you go again. I don't care what you say, you're stuck with me. I'd rather die, than live without you. If you hate me, fine, tough on you, I won't leave anyway!" How could Joey believe that she hated her? It was Joey who had a reason to hate her.

"I don't hate you, I thought you hated me." She looked into Joey's eyes, there were no hate to be seen. "I love you Joey, I love you!" Joey had looked back at her with the warmest eyes and replied:" I love you too, I've never stopped!" pausing, "I think that's all we need to say right now, we have time to talk later."

"We have time to talk later," the thought filled her with joy, Joey would stay, she would stay, never leaving her again. Nothing else mattered, she knew they had to talk about everything, but right now, all that mattered was Joey in her arms.

* * *

The court had taken a recess, voices where bussing, Ruby sat beside Leah not quite knowing what to do. "Do you think they're OK?" She looked into Leah's face. She looked worried too. "I don't know Rubs, but judging after what happened in here, I hope they are." The look on Leah's face didn't exactly help her calm down. She was worried about her sister. She had seen how happy Charlie and Joey had been together, and how devastated she'd been when Joey left. If this didn't work out, she had no idea what her sister would do.

She knew very well what Charlie had done, she was there the morning she came out of Hugo's room. She understood why Joey had left, and she felt sorry for her. She didn't entirely understand why her sister did what she did, but she did understand how devastated she was after Brett vandalized her car, outing her for the whole community.

It wasn't easy, and for once she felt that her fifteen year old brain couldn't comprehend it all. She looked at Morag, still sitting in her chair, her jaw going up and down as if she was chewing on something, but she knew that someone like Morag wouldn't be seen dead with a chewing gum. She was irritated. Ruby looked away, she didn't want to think about what this would mean for the rest of her family. She just prayed that her sister would be OK.

* * *

"Girls…" Leah's voice brought Charlie back to reality. "ehh… they want to start up again…" Charlie lifted her head from its resting place on top of Joey's. She almost smiled at the look on Leah's face. Her eyebrows pulled together, forming the crease between them she had when she was worried. Charlie had seen that crease often for the last three months, when she thought about she had seen it almost every time she had seen her. It had probably been there many other times too, when she had stumbled in late at night, too drunk to find her way into her room. Waking Leah by crashing into some piece of furniture.

Leah had been there for her, and she'd never said thank you. "Thanks Leah, for everything" she felt the weight of Joey leaving her shoulder, instantly missing it. "Yeah, Thanks Leah, we're coming" Joey added.

"ehh… are you guys OK?" Leah asked wavering as she helped Joey up from the floor. Then Joey turned to give Charlie a hand.

Charlie held on to the hand that had pulled her up. Tightening the grip, she once again looked into the face of the girl she loved, seeing a little smile playing in her eyes. "Yeah" she answered, feeling Joey's fingers tighten around her own.

Joey felt her feet tremble on the way back to the courtroom, well, that was really an understatement, her whole body trembled, anxious for what would meet her now. Charlie must have felt it, because she pulled her closer, putting an arm around her waist. It gave her strength. Charlie had promised to be there all the way, and she kept it. She knew she wouldn't be there if it hadn't been for Charlie, and with her by the side, it felt as if she could face anything.

Approaching the door to the courtroom, Joey drew away from Charlie's arm. She wanted to give Charlie space to do what she wanted, no pressure. Charlie stopped, looks at her and then, without hesitation gave her a kiss and grabbed her hand in a tight grip. Joey couldn't get her hand free even if she wanted to, which of course she didn't.

Hand in hand they entered the room, Joey felt every single eye following them across the floor, but this time she didn't mind.

"Charlie, I'm not going to start on this on a personal plan, but if this is true, we have to call you as a witness, you understand?" Charlie looked her straight in the eyes, "of course, I'll take the stand!" "Do you understand what that would mean for your reputation, for your career, for your family?" Morag's voice rose at the end. "I don't care anymore, I'm doing this for Joey!" Charlie replied.

"Morag" the sound of her sister's voice made her swing her head around. "This doesn't change anything for the family, at least not for me. You should be ashamed of yourself, thinking like that. You don't know what they have been trough, and really you should be happy for them, for Charlie, as I am!" Her sister's voice was shaking with emotions. Charlie could hear that the tears where not far away. She embraced her sister holding her tight, whispering down in her hair: "thank you, I love you little, big sister"

Charlie had refused to leave her side, so they found another chair and now she was sitting beside her. Hands tightly knit, none of them willing to let the other gow. Joey stole a glance at her from the corner of her eye. She sat there so proud, head up high, straight back, looking like the Charlie she knew. Strong, brave and focused.

Looking over to the other side she saw Robbo, he still looked like he'd won a million dollars, maybe he hadn't realized what had happened. She couldn't resist a little smile, he would not know what was about to hit him!

"Prosecutor calling Charlie Buckton as a witness" Morag's voice filled the room. Charlie gave Joeys hand a little squeeze before she rose and made her way to the stand. Feeling every eye upon her, she felt exposed, naked. A tear threatened to escape from her eye as she realized that Joey had been sitting there all morning feeling just the same. She quickly dried it off, looking out in the room, she noticed that the smirk had left Robbo's face, he looked like he wanted to jump up and kill her right there.

She forced her eyes of him, nodding to Morag that she was ready.

"You acknowledge that you had, and have a relationship with my client?" Morag sounded as professional as she always did. Charlie had to take a second look at her, admiring her ability to shut her personal feelings out of the way. "Yes" she answered. "not a platonic one, but a relationship in all meanings of the word?" The question was more daring, Charlie could feel herself blushing, "Yes."

The word had hardly left her tongue before Robbo jumped up, charging at Joey. "You're never gonna win, I kill you!" He launched himself over the table, swinging a fist at her face. Charlie stood with her mouth open, frozen, this could not happen again. It was obvious that he'd hit Joey hard, she had been half way out of her chair when he swung at her, sending her crashing into the railing behind.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you all so much for the great reviews. I'm glad you all enjoy the story:) Love you guys!!**

It seemed like an eternity before she was able to move. She had watched the scene play out before her in slow motion. Thinking that her eyes played her a trick, surely this could not be happening again!

The sound of Robbo's heavy body hitting the floor with two officers on top broke the spell she was under. Fright filled her heart as she rushed down to Joey, not knowing what to find.

Strong arms caught her, stopped her in her way. "Charlie, you can't touch her, it looks pretty bad, let the paramedics do their job." She fought the arms and the voice, but against Aiden's strength, she didn't have a chance. She hit him in the chest, pleading with him to let her go.

With Aiden's arms around her squeezing her into him, all she could do was watch. They had put a neck brace on her, and now they were pushing a board under her, strapping her down. Blood was running from her nose and mouth, it didn't look as though she was conscious.

Robbo were forcefully removed from the room. She felt Aiden tens up as he passed, his fist closing behind her back. He knew what Robbo had done, and she knew that he wanted him dead, just as much as she did. Aiden knew everything. It was him she had confessed to about Joey, he had been there many nights at the Surf Club, listening to her drunken rambling. He was her friend, he was Joey's friend.

As she watched the paramedics lift Joey unto the stretcher, she heard a whimper of pain from Joey. It hit her heart with both relief and pain, Joey was hurt, but at least she was awake.

It seemed to her that Aiden had held her for a decade, but it was probably just a few minutes. Joey was wheeled out as the judge again tried to regain order. He didn't succeed very well, but enough to declare the case postponed.

Leah and Ruby made their way over to her, their faces ashgrey. "Hey, let me take you to the hospital!" Leah put her hand on her shoulder. Charlie nodded, feeling the grip of Aiden loosening around her. Instantly feeling the gely state of her legs, realizing that the only reason she was still standing was Aiden. Putting a hand on his arm to steady herself, she looked up into worried blue eyes. "Go" he said,"we'll follow right behind."

"Wait" Morag's voice forcing her thoughts away from Joey. "We have to finish this first." Charlie sighed, realizing she was right, and there were nothing she could do right now anyway, Joey would be taken care of in the hospital.

* * *

Leah watched Charlie walking up and down the corridor in the hospital. They had arrived about five minutes ago, and Joey was still being checked out. Leah felt sorry for Charlie, she had been held back by Morag in the courthouse, doing some stupid paperwork. She didn't believe that Charlie even knew what she was signing, she'd looked as if she was ready to run all the way over to the hospital on her own two feet.

She had driven them over, speeding really, Charlie wasn't the only one worrying about Joey. She had almost landed in her lap when Robbo launched for her. Leah saw how her back was twisted over the railing, it didn't look good. She was scared her back had suffered some serious damage. She hadn't said anything to Charlie, knowing it would probably push her over the edge. She'd asked them, but neither she nor Ruby gave any details.

Ruby, Leah was impressed by the way she handled the situation. She knew that three months of concern for her sister had really made its toll on her. Leah had not been the only one woken by Charlie stumbling in at night. Many times after putting Charlie to bed, she'd been sitting with Ruby, trying to comfort her. It was hard on her, the sisters were close, being just the two of them. Leah sighed, it was nothing she could do right now, all they could do was wait.

Charlie stopped in her steps as Rachel came into the hallway, she couldn't help but notice that she looked great considering it was only two months since she gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. She didn't knew she was back at work, but Charlie was grateful, she was a friend and an outstanding doctor. Joey couldn't be in any better hands than hers. Charlie studied her face, trying to see whether she came with good or bad news.

"How's…" She wasn't able to get more of the question out, her mouth had dried up completely form fear. Rachel looked back at her with a little smile, "She's doing fine, there's no sign of any internal damage, she is really bruised, but she is doing fine." Rachel's calm and soft voice and the words she spoke filled Charlie relief, Joey was going to be OK. She closed her eyes, and took a deep breath. She was going to be OK.

"We like to keep her here till tomorrow though, just for observation. Her back doesn't look to good, even though we can't see any damage on the pictures from the CT. We just want to be sure." Leah and Ruby had joined her as Rachel continued. Ruby uttered the question that was on the tip of her own tongue:" Can we see her?" Rachel smiled, nodded and led them to Joey's room.

Joey hated hospitals, she hated the smell, the sterile rooms, people poking her, checking her, taking test. The last time she was in a hospital was for the physical she had to go through after pressing charges against Robbo. It had been awful, she hated strange hands touching her, it reminded her of him.

Her back hurt, reminding her about what happened, she couldn't remember everything. Just that Robbo charged at her and the pain of her back hitting the railing.

She had just been wheeled into a room, Rachel had told her that everything looked OK on the inside, even though the outside didn't look to good. If the pain was something to go after, her back had to look like hell, not to mention her jaw and neck. She carefully tried to sit up in the bed, but her back wouldn't cooperate, with closed eyes she sank back on her pillow. Bugger,if she was going to stay there.

Her malcontent strain of thoughts was interrupted by the sound of the door. She opened her eyes as Rachel came in closely followed by Charlie, Ruby and Leah. She couldn't help but smile at the look on their faces, and was immediately rewarded with a broad smile from all of them. Charlie came up on her right side, carefully placing a hand on her bruised jaw, tears was forming in her eyes again. She gave her a smile back.

Charlie let her hand drop and found her right hand instead, taking it in a firm grip. Joey closed her eyes for a second, letting herself fill up with the reassuring feeling Charlie's hand gave her.

"We want to keep you here at least over the night for observation," Rachel voice drew her back. Joey planted her eyes in her,"No way! I don't want to be here, you can't keep me here!" She was unable to hide the panic that filled her from the thought of having to stay there.

"Yeah, but you have to be looked after…" "No worries" Leah interrupted her, "She'll come home with us, we'll take care of her." "Well… OK, but I'll drop by to night to check on her." Rachel hesitantly agreed. Joey felt her panic melt away at Leah's words. She knew that Rachel and Leah had been friends for a long time, and she suspected that was the reason she agreed.

Charlie had never experienced so many feelings in such a short period of time, but when Leah said Joey should come home with them, the only feeling left was delight, Joey would be home again. She let her hand wander up and down Joeys arm, smiling down at her. "You want to come home with me?" It was partly a question, partly a statement. Joey looked up at her, gave her the biggest smile her bruised jaw allowed her. Charlie smiled back, relieved she had picked up on the offer.

* * *

Joey slowly made her way up to Leah's house, hanging on to Charlie's arm. It felt good to be back. This place had been more home for her than her real one. Here, people had cared for her, made her feel like she belonged.

Well into the kitchen, Leah turned to her, grabbed her arms and pulled her in for a long hug. "It's so good to have you back again, I've missed you, VJ has missed you. I think he fell in love with you." Leah finished with a chuckle. Ruby stepped up beside her, taking Leah's place. Joey flinched as she threw her arms around her, hitting the bruise on her back. Ruby apologized, placed her arms loosely around her neck instead. "Thank God, you're here, I love you" Ruby's voice trembled. Joey hugged her back, "love you too" she replied.

Charlie stood watching Joey been welcomed back, it made her feel so good, at least some people accepted her, them. Knowing that Ruby was one of them made her feel that they could work this out. The thought of having to work things out filled her with dread, they had just postponed talking about the last three months. Eventually they had to talk about it.

Feeling Joey swaying a little made her push those thoughts away, yeah, they had to talk about it, but not right now. She stepped in grabbing a hold of Joey's elbow.

"Hey, why don't you take a nice, warm bath while I cook us dinner, I think it'll do you good!"" Leah suggested, "VJ won't be home to night, so we'll have a nice, quiet evening ,just us girls."

"Yeah, come, I draw you a bath" Charlie guided her towards the bathroom. Joey follow her, it would feel good to immerse her sore body into warm, shooting water.

Joey sat on the toiletseat watching Charlie filling the tub with water, she put a handful of something Joey couldn't see in, letting her hand swirl through the water. She was still in her uniform, it looked kind of funny seeing her prepare a bath for her in it. She let out a little giggle.

Charlie turned and looked at her, "what's funny?" she asked a little bewildered. "Just you, dressed all professional, drawing me a bath!" Joey answered. "I like you in uniform" she continued, lifting one of her eyebrows. Charlie smiled back at her, feeling the tone in her voice light a fire inside. Taking a deep breath, she tried to calm herself down. She had missed her, missed her body, her touch, her lips. With Joey it hadn't been just sex, they had made love. It was deeper, better, more satisfying than she had ever experienced with any man.

She looked at Joey, this was not the time, she wanted to, but she could see that she was in pain. Right now, the most important thing was to make her feel better. She took the few steps over to her. "Let me help you get out of that thing." The cute, pink shirt from this morning had been ruined at the hospital, replaced by some blue t-shirt.

Carefully she pulled the shirt over her head, turning her around to open the zipper in her skirt, her eyes fell on her back for the first time. "Oh Joey!" Charlie could hardly believe her eyes,"I Think you need to be in the hospital, this looks awful!" A third of her back were covered by a bruise. It was swollen, black and purple. Some places the skin had broken.

"No, I can't be there," Joeys voice was trembling, "It…it reminds me of Robbo." Charlie understood, and she didn't want her to be any other place either, but the bruise concerned her. But Rachel had said she would check in later, she reassured herself.

Standing behind her Charlie lifted her hands to undo her bra. In any other circumstances she wouldn't been able to keep her hands away from her, but at the sight of her wounds, all she desired was to hold her tight, feel her close, nothing more.

Joey felt her hands on her back, even now the gentle touch filled her with passion. Letting her bra drop to the floor, she turned around, facing Charlie. "Join me!" she said grabbing a hold of her waist, pulling her closer. Looking into her eyes, Joey found all the answer she wanted. Slowly she started to unbutton the uniform shirt.

Pushing the shirt down from her shoulder, Joey couldn't resist letting her lips trace the shape of her collarbones. They were slightly more protuberant than they used to be, but the taste where the same. As she felt Charlie's hands weaving into her hair, she let her hands wander to her back, undoing her bra.

She was just standing there, both hands tightly wrapped around Charlie's waist, enjoying the feeling of her naked body against her own. Charlie was showering kisses across her forehead. It felt so good. Oh, how she had missed this, the beautiful, perfect body of the woman she loved pressed against her own.

Charlie couldn't resist Joeys offer, her head spinning as Joey's hand caressed her body. Feeling her body against her own made everything else fade away. Feeling her lips on her shoulder and neck relit the fire inside.

She let her hands live their own life, not aware of what she was doing before she felt Joey jerk. She had let her hands wander down her back, pressing into her, causing pain from the injury to surge through Joey's body.

That brought her back to reality, "To be continued!" she whispered into Joeys ear. "I'm sorry, I touch your back. Let's get you into that Bath!" "It's OK," Joey replied, "join me in the tub!" She smiled at her. Charlie glanced at the tub, it was obviously not made for two, but what the heck, they would fit!

Joey looked down at Charlie lying on her back in the tub, with her head resting on the rim. Inching her way into the hot water, she couldn't stop winching as the hot water touch her back, it stinged. Well into the water, lying on her side with her head resting on Charlie's shoulder, all the pain disappeared. The warmth loosing up her sore muscles, Charlie's arm around her shoulder, filling her with peace.

Charlie let her hand wander up and down Joeys arm resting across her stomach. Enjoying the feeling of her body against hers, it just felt right, it felt like everything inside of her fell in place.

A sharp knock on the door woke her up. "Are you guys OK in there, it's been half an hour, have you drowned?" Rubys teasing voice reached her trough the door. She felt herself blush a little, but answered "We're OK, we'll be right out."

She looked at the woman resting her head on her shoulder, she'd fallen asleep too. She looked at her for a moment, not wanting to wake her up, but with the water going cold, she had to. "Hi, Joey, wake up" she followed up with a kiss on her forehead. "They're missing us!" Charlie rose from the bath, leaning over to help Joey up. "Here, let me help you dry off, I'll be careful!"

It felt good being dried off by Charlie, her hands gentle across her body, finishing up by wrapping the towel around her, and then getting another for her hair. Joey suddenly remembered that she didn't have any clothes there, she started giggling. "What's funny this time, watching me in a towel?" Charlie looked at her with a smile in her eyes. "No, that's not funny, that's exiting!" Joey paused, enjoying the view. "I just realized, I don't have anything to put on… I'm not sure Leah wants me wandering around butt naked in her house."

Charlie started giggling too "No, maybe not, but I wouldn't mind!" Charlie raised her eyebrows giving her a teasing smile, "You can borrow something from me, no problem!"

* * *

Leah had really gone out of her way to make Joey feel welcome. Sitting at the table, wearing one of Charlie's PJ's, she felt really at home. Leah had whipped up spaghetti bolognas, one of her favorites. She was sitting next to Charlie, who held her hand in a vice. She started giggling again:"Charlie, if I'm to enjoy this great meal Leah made for us, I have to borrow my hand for a while!"

Charlie exploded in laughter, Joey was still funny. All the good feelings in her bubbled over. She laughed like she hadn't done for three months. Joey was laughing too, infected by Charlie's. Leah and Ruby soon joined in, laughing because they were.

Ruby felt tears rise to her eyes through the laughter. It had been so long since she'd heard her sister laugh. She had almost forgotten what it sounded like, she thought it was the most beautiful sound in the world, she'd gotten her sister back.

Leah looked at the two girls in front of her, it was good to see them laugh, but she knew they had some rough patches ahead of them. The familiar worried crease started to form on her forehead. Then she brushed the thought away, they were happy tonight, that was all that mattered.

Joey, trying not to laugh too hard, it wasn't good on her back, dug into the plate of spaghetti. The food was good, the company was good. She enjoyed the warm feeling of belonging that surrounded her. It was wonderful being back.

"I haven't eaten this good for months!" Joey exclaimed after the meal. "Thank you so much Leah, and thank you for letting me stay!" Joey smiled at her. "But I'm sorry, I think I have to excuse myself, if I sit here any longer you'll have to carry me to bed." She was tired, exhausted. The day had been an emotional rollercoaster.

"Let me tuck you in!" Charlie looked at her with eyes filled with compassion. "Rachel will get here in an hour or so, but we can just wake you up when she comes." Charlie reached out a hand to help her up. Joey was grateful for the help, she wasn't sure she could make it on her own.

Laying on her stomach in Charlie's bed with Charlie lying beside her, stroking her hair, the last thing she saw before drifting into sleep was Charlie's face, she thought to herself that angels had to have faces like that.

* * *

Sure that Joey had fallen asleep, Charlie carefully maneuvered herself out of the bed, not wanting to wake her again. All she really wanted was to sleep herself, but she had to talk to Ruby first, and wait for Rachel.

Leah and Ruby was still sitting at the table as she walked into the Kitchen. Both of them looking at her, she was overwhelmed by guilt for all the grief she had caused them. "You OK?" Leah's hand touched her arm as she joined them at the table. Charlie saw the crease on her forehead starting to form again. "yeah… no… I don't know." She rested her head in her hands, "I'm scared," she confessed.

"How will it be this time? I declared for the whole court that I loved her! And with Colleen there, all of Summer Bay and Yabbie Creeck knows by now." She stopped, studied the tabletop as if she could find the answer there.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you all for all your great reviews! Just a little comment to previous chapter, I spelled the name of the dish Leah made wrong, It's supposed to be Spaghetti Bolognese, not bologna:)**

**I'm sorry to say that I do not write for Home and Away, I wish I did, I want this to happen too! Maybe I'll try mailing it to them. And just to say, there's more to come:)**

**Enjoy, love you all!!**

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Charlie didn't find the answer she was looking for on the tabletop, but deep in her heart she knew, she couldn't let Joey go again. It wouldn't be easy, but trying for three months to live without her was much worse than anything anyone could throw at her. She rubbed her face with her hands, looking over at Ruby who kept an intent eye on her. She gave her a half hearted smile, trying to show her that it would be OK, but how could she convince Ruby it would be OK when she couldn't convince herself?

"Why don't the two of you go sit on the chough, while I clean up after us?" Leah offered softly, wanting the sister to have some time for them self. "No,"Charlie looked up at her, "you did all the cooking, you shouldn't have to do the dishes too!" "It's no problem, off you go!" Leah waved her hand at them, motioning them out of the kitchen.

Ruby leaned her head against her sister's shoulder, it felt really good to be the one on the receiving end again, like it used to be. So many times for the last three months, she'd been the one holding Charlie while she'd cried for hours. It was all Ruby could do. She didn't have the words, she didn't know what to say, so she just held her. Feeling her heart break into a thousand pieces on behalf of her sister.

"I've missed you," she whispered. "I know, I'm sorry for all the grief I caused you" Charlie replied, resting her chin on top of her sister's head.

"I'm sorry I was so angry that day I saw the two of you kiss…" Ruby felt a need to explain. "I was so shocked, even though I think I suspected that you liked her… I was afraid of losing you… I was supposed to be the only girl in your life. I felt that Joey took that away, took my place..." Ruby couldn't stop the tears from running. "I was scared."

"Then I saw how happy you were with her, and that she didn't take my place, instead she gave me a place in her life. I really liked her." Ruby paused, wrapping a piece of Charlie's hair around her finger.

"Then the morning you came from Hugo's… you scared me, I just knew it wouldn't end good, especially when you decided not to tell her." Ruby lifted her head, looking straight into her sister's eyes. "I'm sorry, I just don't get it, why the hell did you do it?" "No, don't answer" Ruby said as she saw her sister's mouth open to answer. Again resting her head against her shoulder ,she continued;"it's none of my business, it's between you and Joey and I'm sorry to say, but in this I still feel like a kid…I'm just so happy sitting like this, feeling you taking care of me again."

Charlie sat quiet, listening to her sister. She knew very well that she hadn't been there for her since Joey left. She had scared her, worried her and she was sorry for that. She just kept her hand running up and down her sisters back. She was exhausted after the day, but she knew that Ruby needed her now, and she was happy that she finally could be there for her.

* * *

Leah was glad that the sisters had a chance to talk. She loved them both, but with the mess Charlie had been in, she wasn't sure how long she could carry it on. She had a son to take care of, a business to run, and frankly she didn't exactly enjoy taking care of a drunk Charlie. She took a rest from the dishes, leaning her head back; hopefully Charlie and Joey could work things out.

A little knock on the door brought her back,"can I come in?" Rachel stepped in, not even waiting for an answer. Leah didn't mind, Rachel had been her friend since they were in high school. "Yeah, of course, good to see you Rach." Leah smiled at her. She was tired too, but knowing Rachel would pop in to check on Joey didn't make it worth going to bed earlier.

"Hey" Rachel stepped closer to her, lowering her voice "I've heard some rumors in the hospital today… Is it true that Char…"

"Why don't you just go and ask yourself" Leah exploded. She felt all the pressure from the day building up, hearing this from Rachel, always professional Rachel, was the last drop."I didn't take you for one listening to rumors, and then you don't have the guts to ask the person it's about face to face?" Leah regretted immediately what she said the moment the words left her mouth. "I'm sorry Rach, It's just been a long day, I didn't mean to yell at you."

"It's true." Charlie went into the room. she'd heard what they talked about.

"I'm sorry Charlie, Leah was right, I should ask you directly. It's just that I've seen you over the past few months, and I've been worried about you, I didn't want to upset you." Rachel's voice reviled her worry.

"It's OK, Joey and I are together, whether that makes me gay or whatever, I just don't care anymore." Charlie was tired, she didn't feel like explaining anything. "You want to have a look at her? She's in my room." Charlie turned on her heal, leading the way.

* * *

Charlie stared into the sealing, lying on her back next to Joey. She felt that the encounter with Rachel was just a taste of what's to come, and Rachel wasn't even homophobic, she had just been shocked. Apologizing profusely, she told her she was happy for them, it had just taken her by surprise. Charlie sighed, turning her head to look at the person next to her. She took a deep breath, reached out and touched her hair, just to reassure herself that she wasn't dreaming.

Joey woke up with a sweet smell filling her nose. She slowly opened her eyes and found that she couldn't see a thing. In the course of the night, Charlie and her had found each other and closely nuzzled together. Joey had buried her face in Charlie's hair, explaining why she couldn't see, her nose settled in the indentation under her ear. She smiled, hardly believing that she again was with Charlie.

The smile faded away as her thoughts wandered back over the last three months, could she risk Charlie hurting her again?

She pulled herself up on her elbow, looking into Charlie's sleeping face. She looked so peaceful, so beautiful. With her eyes dwelling on the exquisite lines of her face, she knew, she had given Charlie her heart, and she didn't want it back. She knew it wouldn't be easy, but she wouldn't give up on them, couldn't give up on them!

Carefully replacing her head on Charlie's shoulder, making sure she didn't wake her, she was relieved that the pain in her back had receded since last night. Rachel had been there. Joey had hardly woken when she entered the room, she'd checked her back and given her some painkillers. Joey suspected that they still worked.

With her hand across Charlie's stomach she couldn't resist the temptation to slightly pull up her top, reviling some of her warm, soft skin. Joey let her fingers draw circles around her bellybutton, amazed that someone could have such soft skin. She felt passion starting to rise in her, deep inside, where nobody had touched her but Charlie.

She leant in, starting to spread featherlight kisses on her neck and jaw. She felt Charlie wake under her touch, she raised her head, seeking her eyes. She found them, Charlie's still dozy, not entirely awake yet. Joey continued playing with her fingers on her belly. "Good morning sunshine" she whispered, voice thick with emotions. "Hi" was the only word Charlie was able to utter.

Joey cupped one leg over Charlie's, squeezing even closer to her. Half on top of her she lowered her head and met Charlie's lips. She felt Charlie smiling as their lips parted, "now this is the way to wake up!" eyes shining up at her. "I've missed you…"

Joey interrupted her with another kiss. "I missed you too," she smiled down at her, " I missed your smell, the way you taste, the way you make me feel…" she paused, looking deep into the incredible beautiful eyes of her Love. Wondering how anybody could be that perfect.

She loved her eyes, the way they seem to change color according to her emotions. They where bright blue when she was happy, turning into slategrey when she was concentrating or annoyed. But the color Joey loved the most though, was the deep blue color they darkened to when she touched her, reviling the effect she had on her. She knew her eyes reflected the same emotions as Charlie's, there where no way that she could hide the desire Charlie woke in her.

Joey lowered her head again, touching the lips she had dreamt about so many times. She gave her light butterfly kisses, starting at one corner of her mouth, all the way over to the other, postponing the desire to kiss her deep, letting her tongue explore her mouth. She continued with the light kisses until Charlie made a dissatisfied little sound. She lifted her head slightly, again looking into her eyes. She felt Charlie weaving her hands into her hair, pulling her down for the kiss she longed for.

Charlie enjoyed the feeling of Joey's body pressing against hers. She pulled Joey in to replace the light kisses she had showered across her lips with the deep one she was hungering for. Joey's lips and tongue set her on fire. She was surprised by the power of the desire that filled her. She started to pull up Joey's top, but suddenly remembering her back, she stopped. "How's your back? You're not up for this." She was concerned, the injury wouldn't heal in just a night.

"Don't worry" Joey replied, giving her a teasing smile, "I'm not going to use my back!"

* * *

Charlie felt as if everything bad in the world had disappeared. Joey had brought her to a point where she was lost from the world, her body lifting her up into the stars. She was completely filled with satisfaction, peace and joy. Joey was still on top of her, resting her head on her shoulder, letting her fingers play with her neck. She smiled, she loved to feel Joeys weight pressing her body down into the mattress. She lifted her leg, cupping it over Joeys just to keep her there, not wanting her to roll off.

Joey lifted her head, looking down at Charlie's face, supporting herself on her elbows. She couldn't believe the experiences Charlie's body gave her. She had never felt anything like it before. She saw the same satisfaction in Charlie's face. "Hi!" She gave Charlie a short, soft kiss: "do you remember what you wanted to do after that night in the car?" Charlie smiled and nodded. "Well… " Joey lifted her hands and brushed the hair away from her forehead, Letting her hands rest on each side of her head, she smiled and started to sing form a Blanche Dubois song:

_I'd go away with you Well, If you ask me to I don't care what places, I only just need-_

_Let's live like those moments we've seen, In those photographs Let's live like lovers always has..._

_So let's just take the car. Don't have to travel to far…_

_Tell me how it could be. Let's love like we should be. Holding on to nothing but today…_

_See, I'll go away with you So come on ask me to Let's see the world big and blue…_

_Oh, yes there'll be heartaches. All this stupid mistakes But something's just are meant to be_

_You ought to know_


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you all for the great reviews! I have to give a major mushy alert for this chapter, I'll make it up to you later! Hope you all enjoy it!**** Love you guys:)**

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**Two years into the future**

Charlie was sitting in her chair on the porch, her legs resting on the railing in front of her. Absent-minded she played with the coffee cup she held in her hands, enjoying the beautiful view over the beach.

Joey had only one demand when they went house hunting about a year and a half earlier, it had to have an ocean view, Charlie had happily obliged.

She smiled into her cup, today where their two-year anniversary. Her smile broadened, it had been two wonderful years!

They had left the Bay the day after the trial, got in her car and taken off up the coast. Planning to be gone for two weeks, they ended up staying away four. Her smile disappeared. The two first weeks had been hell. They had spent the time talking through what had happened. Both of them opening up, allowing the other to see the wounds and the hurt they had caused each other.

Many times the only thing that kept them going was the thought of the hell they had been through the three months they had been apart. They had cried, yelled, shouted at each other, but slowly and painfully they worked through it, allowing their wounds to be cleaned and healed. They had learned to know each other more intimately than neither of them had known anyone else.

Feeling totally drained from the two weeks of emotional turmoil, they didn't feel ready to go home. Charlie took two more weeks leave from work, and they continued up the coast. In a small, secluded beach resort they had started anew.

They had done exactly the things they had wished for that morning in the car; eat, sleep, swim… Charlie felt her heart starting to race as she thought of the fourth thing… before Joey, sex had been good, but not amazing, with Joey though… her heart really racing now. She'd never known that a human body could produce such strong sensations, that it could be so lost in a touch. Joey sent her to the stars, time and time again.

Her thought wandered to this morning, Joey had got up before she woke, filled the bathroom with candles and roses, drawing a bath. They had wisely invested in a bathtub big enough for two. The bath they had shared at Leah's after the court case had given them a taste for more of the same.

Joey had gently waked her up, showering kisses over her shoulders. She loved it when Joey waked her like that. She often did, being an early morning bird. Theyhad a wonderful time in the tub, spending a long time enjoying each other's bodies. Making Love to Joey was just as amazing now as it had been two years ago. She never got tired of her, just a look from Joey and she melted.

She knew she had the same effect on Joey; a look was more than enough to make her eyes darken with desire. A touch, and neither was able to keep away. She smiled again; this morning had been special, wonderful and incredible satisfying.

She picked up a small jewelry box from the table beside her. Four months earlier Hugo and Martha had announced their wedding date, they had selected the same date as hers nad Joeys anniversary date.

They had actually become quite good friends. When they had returned from their four weeks getaway, they had decided they had to talk to Hugo. It would be too awkward living in the same town if they didn't.

It hadn't been easy on him. He felt terrible guilty for sleeping with her, not being able to resist the gorgeous woman. Already back then he'd been in love with Martha, and that had just made matters worse. They ended up forgiving each other, deciding to put everything behind them.

Even Joey had forgiven him, and all of them ended up being good friends. Joey even worked with him on occasions, Alf had hired her as skipper on the "Blaxland" taking tourists out on short cruises, and sometimes she took tourists from Hugo if he was fully booked.

Hugo and Martha had invited them both to their wedding. An idea had started to form in her head when she heard the date. Last week she'd went into town and bought it.

She opened the box, taking out the ring she'd bought. It was a plain platinum ring with three little diamonds set in it. It would look beautiful on Joey's finger.

She kept playing with it. She had decided to ask Joey to marry her, not in the legal sense, but in her heart. She wanted to use Hugo's and Marta's wedding as a backdrop. She was nervous though, Joey had just turned twenty-three, six years younger than herself. Maybe she was too young for that kind of commitment? She smiled, she would propose anyway.

* * *

Joey had left the house after the wonderful bath with Charlie. She smiled when she thought about it, it had been perfect! She didn't want to leave, but she had a plan.

She was heading over to Leah's, the first place she'd ever felt really at Home. Leah had been great to her, opening her house to her after the court case. She'd enjoyed being there, she specially enjoyed spending time with VJ, She liked him, he was a funny boy, and he liked to do a lot of the same things she did, swimming, fishing and everything else related to the water. They'd even started surfing together.

She and Charlie had stayed with Leah about six months before they decided to get a place of their own. Leah had met a man, and it started to feel a little crowded at her place. Charlie and she had found a small house by the water, moving there together with Ruby.

It was wonderful having a place of their own, a place they could be them self. They were always careful not being too affectionate in public. By the time they had returned from their four week trip two years ago, much of the gossiping about what happened at the court house had died of. There was always a new scandal to occupied peoples mind, but they didn't want to provoke anyone either.

People had accepted them, except from Colleen of course, who still murmured "It's unnatural" under her breath whenever she saw them. Everything had settled for Charlie at work too, she had actually been promoted to Sergeant about then months ago. Joey was proud of her, and happy that her father had been able to witness it, before he passed away. She knew that one of the reasons Charlie had become a cop was to impress her father, and she had impressed him.

He had been shocked when Charlie told him about them, but surprisingly fast accepted it. He'd been aware that his mind was slipping, so he decided he didn't have time to be upset. He had welcomed her into the family. It was a different story about Morag tough, but finally she had accepted it too, realizing there was nothing she could do about it.

It had all panned out in the end. People didn't care, they had become Summer Bay's lesbian couple. Joey smiled, Charlie had struggled for a long time trying to figure out whether she was lesbian, straight or bi, in the end she decided she was just "Joeian." Not wanting anyone but her.

Joey felt the same way, she hadn't looked at another woman since the first time she laid eyes on Charlie. No one could ever measure up to the beauty of her girl. She wasn't just beautiful on the outside, but on the inside too. She was caring, funny, sexy, intelligent, the list could go on and on for ever. Joey couldn't contain the joy she felt and gave out a little shout, followed with a few dance steps.

She had told Charlie that she had a group to take out on the "Blaxland" before the wedding. She had lied. There were no tourist.

She had allied herself with Leah, wanting to surprise Charlie. She looked down at the dress she was carrying over her arm. Charlie had given it to her on her birthday. She rarely put a dress on, she didn't have one herself, if she had to wear one, she would borrow one of Charlie's. She liked pants and t-shirts, comfy and casual. But this was not the day for casual. She put her hand in her pocket, feeling the square box she'd put in there. She'd got this idea when Charlie and she was invited to Hugo and martha's wedding, set on the date for their anniversary.

She had traveled to the city a few weeks ago, picking up a ring for Charlie. She wanted Charlie to marry her; she wanted to be Mrs. Charlie Buckton. It wouldn't be in legal terms, but for her it would be just as valid, and she wanted to take advantage of Hugo and Martha's ceremony, pledging her love for Charlie.

She was nervous though, would Charlie like the idea? Joey really wanted her name. Her own family name was Collins, but Brett, her only family left, had never accepted her and Charlie. He'd moved away from the Bay after the trail, not wanting to be in the same part of the country as her. Joey wanted a family name that was real family, and her family was Charlie and Ruby. "Joey Buckton," she liked the sound of it!

* * *

"Hey! Do you want help to get ready?" Ruby came out on the porch, and with no further ado, she placed herself on Charlie's lap. Taking the ring from Charlie, she slowly turned it, admiring it from all angels. "This is just so beautiful, it'll suite Joey perfectly!" Ruby smiled, her sister had told her what she planned. Ruby was happy for her.

She had seen her sister grow into the strong, confident and most important, happy woman she was now. She had also become more open, showing more feelings than she used to before. It was thanks to Joey. Her sister had fallen in love with her, never to raise again. She was still in love. Ruby could see it, well, even a blind person would be able to see it, on both of them!

They just sat there for a while, enjoying the peace and quiet around them.

Charlie playfully pulled her sisters ponytail, "You are too big to sit on my lap, my feet are sleeping!" Charlie laughed, pushed her off. "Hey, help me up, I can't walk!" She reached out for Ruby's hand.

* * *

"Wow!" Leah was speechless as Joey entered the room with her dress on. She had helped her with hair and makeup, but seeing it all come together blew her mind. She was absolutely gorgeous. That dress had to be expensive, she knew Charlie had given it to her for her birthday. It was beautiful. "Wow" she repeated, I didn't know you could look that good!" Realizing what she had said, she started to giggle, "I mean, you're always cute, but in that one you look incredible!"

She didn't just look incredible, she was radiant. Joey looked back at her, insecure "Sure it looks OK? I want to look good for Charlie, but I'm not used this dress thing." She nervously rubbed her hands together, not sure about where to put them. "Believe me, you look amazing!" Leah reassured her.

She knew the reason for her nervousness, Joey had told her about her plan. Leah was happy for them. She had known them as a couple from the very beginning, supported them and been there for them. She had seen the good influence Joey had on Charlie and vice versa. She'd been so worried about them when they left for their trip, knowing it would make them or break them. She'd really wanted them to work it out, she just had a feeling that they where meant for each other.

They had worked it out, and it made sense to her that Joey wanted to make a commitment to Charlie, and she thought it was a great idea using Hugo and Martha's wedding. She smiled at Joey, rubbing her hand over her arm. "Charlie will be blown away!" she reassured her.

* * *

Charlie was nervously standing by the driveway, watching the guests arrive. She still hadn't seen anything of Joey. She looked at her watch, they had agreed to meet on Martha's ranch twenty minutes before the ceremony was to begin, and now she was running five minutes late. She felt unwelcome thoughts playing in her mind, what if something had happened to her? Just as the strain of thoughts invaded her brain completely, Ruby put an elbow in her side. "There their coming," she said, stretching up to give her sister a kiss on the cheek, she continued with a glimpse in her eye "I leave you to it!"

Charlie felt her jaw drop when Joey climbed out of Leah's car. Unable to get it back up she just stared. She could hardly believe that the revelation standing before her was Joey. She looked amazing. She had her hair up, tiny, white flowers scattered in it. Her makeup had been delicately put on, not too much, just enough to emphasize her beauty.

She had put on the dress she had given her on her birthday. When she bought it she had imagined how it would look on her, but she hadn't even been close to the real image. The pale iceblue silk suited her skin tone perfectly. The dress itself was plain, narrow straps over the shoulders, a modest v-neck, the fabric clinging to her body, reviling her gorgeous figure. The hem was asymmetrical, ending high up on the thigh on one side, reaching down to her knee on the other.

Charlie wanted Joey to turn around, knowing what the dress hid in the back. As if Joey had read her mind, she slowly turned, twisting her head to keep her eyes locked on her.

If she had been beautiful from the front, the back was even more amazing. The dress was modest in the front, but the back was daring. It was open all the way down to her butt, stopping just short of it. Showing off the "dimples " she had just above it. She turned all the way around, then just standing there gazing back at her, letting Charlie enjoy the view.

Charlie saw a glittering smile spread across Joeys face. All the nervousness she had felt melted away. She knew this was the One for her, the woman she loved.

Climbing out of the car, Joey's eyes were locked on Charlie. That she could be even more beautiful then she used to be, was beyond Joey's comprehension. But there she was, if an angle had been standing next to her she would have put it to shame. Not even angles could be as beautiful as Charlie.

She was wearing a dress that matched her own. The same color an fabric, but the cut was different. It had a deep neckline, reviling her cleavage, showing off a little of the roundness of her breasts. The fabric wrinkled around her waist, smoothing out over her hips, and ended high on her thigh, making her legs look like they continued forever. She had her hair down, but in between it, she could see long earrings glittering, emphasizing the length of her neck.

Joey could hardly breathe when Charlie started to move towards her. She started to move too, drawn to Charlie by an invisible force. Not being able to speak, she reached out her hands, finding Charlie's. Charlie closed the gap between them, looking into her eyes. Joey could feel the love for this woman rise in her, causing her to tear up.

Charlie stood close, their bodies almost touching, slowly lifting her hands up between them. Joey recognized the motions. Charlie had done the same thing on the boat that day they both had realized they were in love. Lifting her hands, caressing them. Charlie had been scared that day, and she had ran from what she was feeling.

Joey looked her straight in the eyes, there were no fear there now, just love, deep blue eyes filled with love for her.

Charlie wasn't awear of what she was doing before she had grabbed a hold of Joeys hands, lifting them up between them. Then she had recognized it. She had done this before, on the boat. She remembered that she had run that day, away from Joey, she didn't understand how she could have been so stupid. All she really wanted to back then was to kiss her.

Looking into those goldenbrown eyes now, she saw the same love she had seen then. Only this time is was stronger, no insecurities, just trust, trust in her. Charlie couldn't help herself, she leaned forward and kissed her.

She didn't care if the whole world was watching, she gave her a deep kiss, entering into her mouth, feeling the sparks between them.

* * *

Leah and Ruby had found each other in the crowed. Ruby was about to burst from having to keep her sisters proposal a secret. She reached Leah, grabbing a hold of her hand. "I got to tell you something," she said as she dragged her away from the rest of the crowd. "I have to tell someone, I'm so excited" Her eyes glittering. "Leah," she said, "Charlie is going to ask Joey to marry her, well, not for real, but.." She was interrupted by Leah laughing. "Are you serious Rubs?" Leah hardly able to form the words, she was laughing so hard. "What's so funny about that?" Ruby felt insulted by Leah's reaction.

Leah looked at her trying to compose herself, "No, no ,no" she hiccupped, "You see, Joey has told me that _she_ is going to ask Charlie to marry _her_, well not for real, but.." Ruby exploded in laughter too, oh, her poor, poor sister who had been so nervous for what Joey would say!

* * *

Hand in hand, they walked behind the tent where the wedding ceremony was to be held. The air was filled with the buzzing of voices. Out of sight from the others they stopped. Charlie took a deep breath. "Joey" "Charlie" they spoke simultaneously, both stopped, looking at each other.

Then they heard voices calling to them, Ruby and Leah came running towards them hand in hand. Their faces shining with laughter. "Sorry to interrupt girls, but we want to be witnesses!" Leah laughed at them.

Joey didn't quite understand what was happening with Leah and Ruby, but with the time closing in on the ceremony, there was no time to chase them away.

Charlie was both annoyed and glad that her sister and Leah had come, it would be nice to have witnesses to what she was about to do, even though it made her incredibly nervous. She turned to Joey, focusing all her attention on her again.

"Marry me!" again they spoke simultaneously. "What" they said, not sure if they had heard right. Leah and Ruby was standing beside them shaking from suppressed laughter. "Girl's "Leah said, hardly able to speak. "You had the same idea!" Ruby finished.

"What?" Charlie and Joey looked at each other, then at Leah and Ruby. "How long..?" Charlie looked at them. "No, we known only for a few minutes that the two of you had the same idea, Ruby couldn't keep it to herself, so she came and told me what you had planned, and Joey came to me a few weeks ago, sharing what she had planned." Leah smiled, "So go on, we want to be here when you do it!"

Charlie turned her attention towards Joey, they had the same idea, she should have known, it wasn't the first time it happened. All her nervousness melted away, she leaned her forehead against Joeys. Then took a deep breath, stretched up, grabbing a hold of her hands.

"Joey Collins... marry me!" She said softly. Joey looking up at her, smiling, a tear glittering in the corner of her eyes. "yes!" she replied "I'll marry you!" Charlie reviled the ring she'd been hiding in her hand, gently she lifted Joey's hand and placed the ring on her finger. She leaned in and kissed her passionately.

Joey pulled back from the kiss, she was so happy, Charlie wanted to be with her for the rest of her life, just as she wanted to be with her! She reached into her purse, closing her hand around the ring she had bought for Charlie. She gave the purse to Ruby before concentrating all her attention on Charlie.

She smiled at her, again locking eyes with her. She had to do this her way, even though it may seemed a little cliché. She knelt down on one knee, holding on to Charlie's hands. She saw tears forming in her eyes. "Sergeant Charlie Buckton" she started, "will you do me the honor and marry me?

* * *

Ruby kept half an eye on Charlie and Joey as she slowdanced with Xavier, he was an amazing guy, and they were still going strong. She was happy for him, his brother and Martha, but most of all she was happy for her sister. She looked at them as they danced, closely wrapped together. Usually they didn't show off their affection in public, but tonight it was clear that they didn't care about anyone but them self.

She smiled, she was happy for them!

"I love you so much, you make me happier than I ever imagined possible!" Charlie rested her arms on Joeys shoulders, letting her fingers play with a lock of hair that had escaped from her hairdo. Joey had her arms around her waist as they slowly moved to the music. Charlie felt eyes of people around them staring at them, she didn't care. "Let them look "she thought, pulling Joey closer, letting her lips dwell on hers.


	6. Chapter 6

**recurrence**

Joey was cleaning up the boat after the days cruise. She loved the "Blaxland," it was a great boat, beautiful lines, and it was a joy to handle. It reminded her a of Charlie. She smiled as she thought about her, she always did. She looked down at the ring Charlie had given her. She loved it. She loved Charlie.

They had been "married" for two months now, one day more blissful than the other. It was as if the rings had given them both more confident when they were in public, not just holding hands or stealing a kiss when they went out. Joey blushed as she thought about an evening a couple of weeks ago.

They had decided to go on a date at the SurfClub, a local band had been playing. Charlie and she had danced the night away, shared some drinks and on the dance floor, they held each other. Arms tightly wrapped around each other, they had kissed, touched, enjoyed themselves.

After a few drinks too many, they had started on their way home, walking along the beach. The moon was hanging low over the water, creating an enchanted atmosphere. They had stopped, kissed, enjoyed the magic of the night. They had decided to sit down for a while, just to relax, but unable to keep away from each other, they had made love. There, right on the beach, if someone had walked passed, it wouldn't be hard to understand what they were doing.

It had been fun, and good! Joey picked up the pase, longing to get home into the arms of her love. She finished up, took a short glance to make sure she hadn't overlooked anything. She jumped down unto the pier and started jogging, not wasting another minute on getting home.

She just passed the baitshop as she felt someone closing in on her from behind. She felt a chill running down her spine. Spinning around she looked straight into a too familiar face, a face she'd been sure she would never see again.

"Missed me?" Robbo grabbed her around her waist pulling her close to him. "I told you I would never let you win!" The smirk on his face was just as disgusting as it used to be. Joey was overwhelmed by fear. It had been almost three years since the assaults, but still she occasionally had nightmares about it.

She was paralyzed from dread, feeling his strong arms tightening around her, locking her arms against her side. He dragged her backwards behind the baitshop, threw her to the ground and with one knee firmly placed on her back, he ducktaped her hands together, proceeding to do the same with her feet.

Panicking she started to scream. Robbo quickly placed a hand over her mouth, shutting her down. She opened her mouth and bit him. She felt blood running into her mouth as she broke the skin, she almost threw up from disgust. Robbo sweared at her, hitting her over the head.

Her last thought were Charlie.

* * *

Charlie was sitting on the porch, indolent playing with the ring on her finger. It was made of gold, an intricate pattern was weaved on it, the lines curving around a single stone. It was beautiful, it was her "wedding" ring. She smiled, they were happy together, more than happy, she didn't find a word to describe the feeling belonging to Joey gave her, and Joey was hers. She leaned her head against the wall behind her as thoughts of Joey filled up her mind.

A cold gust of air woke her up, she had fallen asleep. Looking at the clock, she went inside to find Joey, she would be home by now, she had probably not wanted to wake her. She opened the door, calling out for Joey. No one answered, well, she thought, she's probably held up by something with the boat. She decided to take a shower while she waited for her.

Half an hour later and still no Joey. Charlie started to be concerned. She should have been home two hours ago, it wasn't like her to be late without sending her a text or call. She decided to walk down to the pier, seeing what took her so long.

She didn't hear the telephone ring as she left the house.


	7. Chapter 7

**Thank you all for the great reviews, I'm glad you all enjoy it!**

* * *

Charlie hurried towards the pier; she had a lurking feeling that something was wrong, Joey would tell if she were running late. Charlie reach for the phone, just meeting an empty pocket. "Shit", she'd left it at home, remembering it was laying on the kitchen table. Well, she was closer to the pier than home, so she decided to continue.

There wasn't a living soul to be seen at the pier. Charlie stood looking around, trying to figure out where Joey were. It was too silent, just the sound of the water lapping up against the boats. A gust of cold air swept over her. She shivered, she should have put on some more clothes before she left. The day that had started out with beautiful weather, was no turning now grey and cold as clouds crept in from the sea, matching the way she felt on the inside.

She turned and started to walk back home to call Joey, accusing herself for being stupid enough to leave her phone. As she passed the baitshop, something on the ground caught her attention. Her heart jumped into her throat, threatening to beat its way out of her mouth. It was one of Joey's shoes.

She felt cold hands of fear grab a hold of her heart. Something had happened, but what, who? She had felt it, felt that something wasn't right. She stood frozen, holding on to the shoe, trying to get all her cop instinct to kick into action.

"Charlie! Why the hell don't you answer your phone?" Watson shouted at her from a policecar. Senior constable Watson actually, she'd been promoted. Watson always called her sergeant, the fact that she had used her name caused the cold hands around her heart to tighten their grip.

"Charlie, we got a call from the prison today, some idiot has messed up the paperwork and given Robbo a three day leave." Watson's voice were filled with concern, she knew very well what Robbo was capable of.

"What?" Charlie couldn't believe her own ears, surly they were just playing a cruel trick on her. "You're kidding me, there's no way anybody with sense would let that sleazebag out!" The look on Watsons face told her it wasn't a joke. "What morons do they have working there? They have to be idiots to let…" Charlie stopped her tirade, realizing she was still holding on to Joey's shoe. "I have to get my phone…" She could hardly get the words out. She took off running. "Hey!" Watson called after her, "It's quicker if I drive you!"

* * *

Joey woke as she felt cold water hitting her face. She opened her eyes and stared straight into Robbo's. She started screaming, just to discover that she couldn't get a sound out. Robbo had taped her mouth shut. She was so scared, why wasn't he in jail?

"You thought I would let you get away?" He put his face right into hers, her nose filled up with his disgusting smell. "I hear that you and your cop friend are playing happy family." He continued, "Well, I'm sure you missed me!" grinning as he started to run his hands over her body.

She wiggled and kicked, trying to get away from him. "Charlie!" she called out in her head, "oh Charlie, get me out of here!" She felt a cold blade of steel against her stomach, Robbo cut her t-shirt open, not caring that he also pierced her skin.

* * *

Charlie had put on her uniform, it usualy helped her focusing. They were standing in the police station, Charlie couldn't concentrate on the briefing, the uniform didn't help much this time, all her thoughts was occupied with Joey. He had to have taken her, But where to? It was as if she could her Joey calling her for help, but the voice didn't give her any directions were to look for her.

"He's dangerous, probably armed" A voice reached her. she shook her head to clear her mind. "Focus!" she told herself. "We have to assume, since Joey is lost, that he has taken her. Does anyone have an idea where he might bring her?" The voice continued.

"Well, all we know is that he has no home or anything like that here in town. "Watson said, "and considering that he's not exactly the sharpest knife in the drawer…"

Charlie's head exploded; suddenly she knew where Joey was."He has taken her to the hotel where he assaulted her last time!" She said. It was there, it had to be.

* * *

Joey threw up as she felt Robbo over her. With her mouth taped, it all came out of her nose. It was disgusting, but not as disgusting as feeling Robbo's body. She cried, she tried to fight him off, but she didn't have a chance, he was too strong. She cried as she felt him touching parts of her body that belonged to Charlie. She cried as he violated her.

She felt cold water covering her body. It was a repetition of what he'd done last time. He grabbed a hold of her hair, pulling her up. "I enjoyed that" He smirked at her, letting his hand run down her chest. "You needed to feel a real man before you join your father!" She just looked up at him, wanting him to get it over with, she wanted to die. Robbo had destroyed her, she would never let Charlie touch her again. She was used, filthy. Charlie deserved better. She felt Robbo's hand pushing her under. He was too strong to fight; she welcomed the darkness covering her.

* * *

Charlie felt as she was stuck in a déjà vu, running up the stairs in the hotel, bulletproof west, only this time she was the last one. They didn't want her as an active officer, she was too emotionally involved. It would make her unpredictable. They were wrong; she knew exactly what she would do when they found him. She would kill him!

She heard racket on the top of the stairs, she ran up, finding Robbo on the ground with three cops on top of him. "This time you're too late," he smirked at her with his head grinded into the floor. "She was good though, I gave her things you can never give her."

Charlie felt all the blood drain from her head. He hadn't! He couldn't!Not again, not to her Joey. She stood paralyzed, unable to think or move. "Charlie! In here!" she was jerked into action by Watson's voice. Running towards the bathroom, she couldn't help thinking, "I saved her last time, I'll do it again!" Expecting to be met by the same scene as last time, she stormed into the room. She froze in her step, this wasn't like last time.

Watson had dragged Joey's naked, limp body from the tub, onto the floor, she ripped the tape of Joeys mouth. Charlie listened for the sound of her gasping for air. There came no sound.

"Start CPR!" Again, Charlie was jolted into action by Watson. She knelt down by Joeys head. Tilted her head back and blew into her mouth. "Come on Joey, don't leave me!" She cried as she paused and felt for a pulse. Watson gave her heart compressions, "Come on Joey, you can do it" Watson said between her teeth, concentrating on the CPR.

Charlie gave her mouth to mouth again, waiting to hear Joey gasp for breath herself, nothing.

She did it again and suddenly Joey coughed and dragged in air. Charlie pushed her over on her side. Relieved shr let her eyes run down her body, stopping at the sight of bruises on her hip from Robbo's hands. The relief vanished, replaced by hate. Hate towards Robbo for raping Joey again.

The paramedics came in, covered Joey up, put her on a stretcher and took her away. Charlie felt her heart shatter as she watched. "Hey, let's follow them, I'll drive." Watson gave her a nudge in the back. She nodded in return.

"We have to get Ruby, I can't tell her this over the phone." Charlie suddenly remembered her sister. She loved Joey too, and she shouldn't have to hear about it over the phone. "She's at Xavier's." Watson quickly changed direction.

* * *

Ruby was snuggling into Xavier's arms. She loved him, he was so good to her, always ready to stand up for her and protect her. It didn't hurt that he looked like a blond god either. She smiled, putting her arms around him.

They were torn out of their bliss at the sound of sirens stopping outside the house. Curious they ran out the door, wanting to see what was going on. Ruby froze as she saw her sister's ashgrey face. Something was wrong, she could feel it. Grabbing a hold of Xavier's hand she whispered "What's wrong?"


	8. Chapter 8

Charlie kept pasing up and down the hospital corridor. Nervously waiting for news about Joey. Ruby was sitting on a chair beside Xavier, looking like she was about to jump out of her own good skin. She was chewing on her nails, nervous as she was.

Charlie hadn't been able to give details about what had happened to Joey when Watson and she picked her up. She just told her that Robbo had gotten to Joey, and that she'd been taken to the hospital. Ruby had whitened of fear, remembering what he had done before.

Suddenly Leah stormed in, closely followed by Aiden and Nicole who had become a couple, and if you saw one, the other wouldn't be far away. "We heard rumors… Robbo…" Leah stuttered. Charlie realized she had forgotten to call, she should have, they were Joey's and hers best friends. "I'm sorry guys, I should have called, I forgot…" She answered, rubbing her fingers across her forehead.

"It's OK, How's she doing?" The worried crease between Leah's eyebrows where deeper than Charlie had seen in a long time. "I don't know," she answered, "we haven't heard anything…"

She was interrupted as Rachel came into the hall. "I'm her doctor," she started. Charlie felt a small wave of relief wash through her. Rachel had taken care of Joey before. She knew her, and she was very capable doctor.

"She's doing OK," She continued, her voice soft and shooting as always. She was a master of calming people down. "She's fine physically, just some bruises, but they won't take long to heal." She stopped, looking at Charlie, not sure how to tell the rest.

Charlie knew what she was about to say, she didn't want to hear it. She wanted to hear that it wasn't true, that Robbo just had said it to get to her. That the bruises on Joey's hip was just from being thrown into the tub.

She felt her knees give away, and were saved from hitting the floor by Rachel grabbing a hold of her, redirecting her fall unto a chair. She felt hands on her head pushing it down between her knees. "Breath, slowly!" Rachel's voice encouraged her. "Just breath!" Her hand stroking her back.

She saw Rubys legs in front of her, then the rest of her body as she kneeled down. She felt hands cupping her head, giving her some of her strength back. She raised her head, looking into two pair of worried eyes. One pair belonging to Ruby, the other to Rachel. "Do you feel Ok? Do you want to lay down for a while?" The tone in Rachel's voice reviled her concern.

"No, no… I'm fine… you wanted to say?" Charlie paused, not wanting to hear the answer, but knowing she couldn't hide from it.

Rachel looked at her, "you know… Robbo raped her…" she was interrupted by a simultaneously gasp from everyone around. "As I said, she's fine physically, but she haven't said a word to us since she came. Just that she don't want anyone to see her."

"Can I… can I see her" Charlie pleaded with Rachel. She couldn't hold back the tears running down her face. "I have to see her!"

Rachel looked at her for a second, "yeah, I think that's a good idea!"

Rachel lead her into Joey's room, it was the same room she had been in after Robbo's assault on her at the court house. Joey met her eyes for a brief second, before she turned her back on her, curling into fetusposition.

Charlie felt overpowered by the pain Joey caused her when she turned her back at her. She wanted to be there for her, removing the pain Robbo had caused her. Brushing away the fear she knew raged through her body. She walked over, placed a hand on her shoulder, "Please, Joey, talk to me!" The shoulder didn't move, there were no reply.

Charlie sighed, she wanted to run down to the police station where she knew Robbo had been taken. Finding her gun, place it between his eyes and pull the trigger. No, that would be too quick and painless. She wanted to get a knife, cut of his dick and sit down watching him slowly bleed to death!

She woke from her thoughts of revenge when she felt the shoulder under her hand shiver. Momentarily Robbo was forgotten, all her attention concentrated on Joey. She let her hand gently caress her back, feeling her shivering more violently. Overwhelmed by the urge to hold her and comfort her, protecting her, Charlie climbed into the bed behind her, molding her body around Joeys. She put her arms around her pulling her close.

Holding her tight, she whispered into her ear. "I love you, I won't let go of you!" there was no reply. Charlie continued to repeat the words, like a mantra: "I love you, I won't let go of you!"


	9. Chapter 9

Joey opened her eyes and looked straight into deep blue eyes inches from her own. She rejoiced, she had died, gone to heaven where she would drown in those eyes forever.

* * *

She felt herself jerked and shaken around. What had happened to her paradise? The sound of sirens reached her ears, then voices. "We have a young female… assaulted… bp….heart rate….five minutes…"

She felt her body starting to ache, everything came rushing back. Robbo had… she felt a scream forming in the pit of her stomach, building up through her throat, forcing its way out her mouth "Nooooo…"she sat up fighting straps that held her. "Let me go!" she cried, "Let me out!" strong arms grabbed a hold of her, pushing her down. She panicked, Robbo was still there!

"Relax!" a voice that didn't belong to Robbo reached her through the panic."You're safe, no one's gonna hurt you!"The voice was gentle, calming her a little. "You're on your way to the hospital. A hand touched her cheek. She jerked away from it.

* * *

Joey felt like she was hovering over her body, looking down at herself. This couldn't be happening to her, it had to be someone else. She saw people pocking her, checking her. She saw hands touching her, but she couldn't feel it. Rachel leaned over her, saying something. She couldn't hear it. She tried to form the words "don't let anybody see me!" but she didn't know if she was just thinking it, or if she had actually said it.

* * *

Joey opened her eyes looking straight into deep blue eyes filled with love and concern. She felt a rush of shame flooding over her. What was wrong with her, why did this keep happening? She was disgusted with herself. She didn't want Charlie to see her, how could she stand looking at her after what Robbo did? She turned her back at her.

She felt Charlie climb into bed with her, putting her arms around her, holding her tight. "I love you, I won't let you go" She repeated over and over again. All Joey wanted to was to turn around, creep as close as she could to her and drown in her embrace.

She couldn't, she couldn't believe what Charlie said. She felt herself starting to slip away from reality. She grabbed for something to hold on to. Her hand finding Charlie's, latching on as if it was her lifeline.

Charlie let tears run down her face, she was hurting for Joey. She pulled her even closer, feeling Joey's hand grabbing a hold of her own. Joey held so thigt, it hurt. Charlie didn't care, just relieved that Joey reached out for her. She felt the love she had for her flow through her body. She wouldn't give up, she would get Joey through this. She had done it before, she would do it again!

She felt Joey's body relax, her breathing became slower and the vice she had around her hand loosened. She laid there for a little longer, making sure she was sleeping. Careful not to wake her she maneuvered out of the bed.

* * *

Rachel leaned her head back, it was difficult writing the report on Joey. They had become friends. Leah and Robert, Hugo and Martha, Charlie and Joey and Tony and she had become a couple's fourclover. They had dinner together, sharing drinks and often just hanging out, being social.

She had to smile as she thought about Charlie and Joey, she had never seen anyone as affectionate as them. They were always within reach of each other; it seemed like one part of their body always touched. Whether a hand, a leg, or arms. They were sweet together.

She knew they was making an effort not to be too affectionate in public, but they didn't succeed very well. They were like teenagers just fallen in love. Sometimes they became so lost in each other, that it was almost impossible to make contact with them.

She sighed, this was a tragedy, she didn't understand how this could happen. How on earth would anyone with their senses intact let Robbo out?

A nock on the door interrupted her thoughts, Charlie entered the room. She looked like hell. Rachel jumped up, grabbing a hold of her arm, she guided her over to a chair. Rachel placed herself on the edge of her desk. "How are you doing?" She was concerned. Charlie looked up at her with tears running down her face, trying to get words out. Unable to, she buried her head in her arms and sobbed.

Rachel put her hand on her back, the motion caused an explosion from Charlie. She jumped up, staring wildly at her. "How could this happened? Why? I gonna kill him!" She shouted, heaving for air, tears streaming down her face.

Rachel grabbed a hold of her, trying to calm her down, finally Charlie gave into the hug, burying her head on her shoulder.

"I'm so scared," she sobbed." I almost lost her, he took her away from me. He hurt her, violated her. I hate him! I want to kill him!" She was shaking all over. "I can't believe it, hasn't she had enough pain in her life. She was happy now, we were happy, than HE comes trying to take it away… I don't know what to do…" Rachel just held her. Right now, there was nothing to say.

* * *

Ruby tiptoed around the house. It had been five days since the assault on Joey. Charlie had brought her home the next day. Joey didn't want to do anything, she just stayed in bed, except when she took showers that seemed to last for hours. Ruby was worried, Charlie had taken leave from work to be with her, but it didn't seem like she was able to reach her. They would stay in bed for ages, Charlie curled up behind Joey, just holding her.

Ruby felt an urgent need to give Joey a slap over the head. She knew it was difficult, but she should let Charlie help her. Ruby headed towards her sister's bedroom, the door was cracked. She peaked in and saw them curled up as usual, looking like they were sleeping. She sighed, she guessed they just needed to be patient.

* * *

Charlie woke , it was dark outside, she felt Joey sleeping beside her. She inched her way out of bed. She needed a break.

With a cup of coffee, she found her way out to the porch and dumped down on her chair. She leaned back, closing her eyes. She was tired, no, exhausted. Joey wouldn't talk to her, she didn't want her to touch her.

"I need a drink!" She told herself.

"Why don't you go and get one?" Aiden's voice startled her. "I want to see Joey, why don't you take the opportunity to unveil a little while I'm with her?" Charlie thought about the offer for a second, and then gratefully accepted, she really needed that drink!

* * *

Joey woke up, her head spinning from sleeping too much. She heard Aiden humming in the kitchen. She had to smile, he didn't seem like the type to hum, but he would when he thought no one heard him.

She decided to join him, threw on some clothes and headed out from the bedroom. Aiden was standing with his back to her, making coffee. "For me too?" She asked. Aiden whirled around, greeting her with a big smile. "Of course beautiful, anything for you!" He pulled out a chair for her, placing a cup on the table in front.

They were just sharing idle conversation, or Aiden was. Then, suddenly he leaned closer, placing a hand on top of hers."Listen," he started, "You have to let her in Joey:"

Joey looked at him, shocked, "It's none of your business, you have no idea what it's like to be me…" Aiden stopped her tirade by squeezing her hand. "Joey, I know what it's like to be you!" With those words he started telling her about his childhood, his grandfather molesting him, his father to gutless to do anything about it.

Joey listened to him talking, a lot of pieces fell into place. She understood why he'd been so persistent about her pressing charges after Robbo raped her on the boat. She understood why he'd yelled at her at the diner when she'd decided not to do so.

"You see Joey, I felt ashamed, thinking that there had to be something wrong with me. Why else would he do it again and again. I thought that no one would want to touch me, that if I were with a girl she would sense it, and be disgusted with me. That she had to see what I was."

"Then I met Belle, she was the first girl I was with. I broke down and told her, and she still wanted to be with me. I was sure that she would never want to touch me, that she would hate me. She told me that I wasn't dirty or sick or disgusting to her. She loved me, she wanted to be with me. To her I was just Aiden." Aiden stopped.

Joey felt tears running down her cheeks, he had said exactly what she thought.

"You have to let Charlie help you, let her in again. She doesn't see Robbo, she sees just you." Aiden grabbed her hands with both of his."She's afraid of losing you, She wants you, she needs you, as you need her!" He looked into her eyes. "She's at the Surf Club, having a drink, why don't you go and join her? Don't let Robbo win!"

She looked at him, she knew he was right. She needed Charlie, she loved her, she had to go after her. She made her way out of the front door. What if Charlie hated her for what had happened, what if she couldn't touch her again? She stopped, no, Charlie hadn't judged her last time, and she was determined not to let Robbo win.

* * *

Charlie sat on the chough in the Surf Club, spinning a bottle of beer between her hands. It wasn't a crowded night. She was relieved, she didn't want to talk to anyone, having to pretend that everything was OK.

Alf had asked how his skipper where doing when she came in. He was worried too. She just told him that she was better and excused herself. Alf had just smiled at her and given her the bottle of beer.

Her thoughts went back to Joey, she didn't know what to do, she was on the end of her rope. Joey kept pushing her away, she never faced her, she didn't talk to her. The only thing that gave her hope was that Joey would grab on to her hand for dear life when she curled up behind her, holding her.

She missed Joey. She missed _her_ Joey, the happy, funny, sexy Joey that brought her to her knees with just a smile. She sighed; She just needed to be patient!

She looked up as Alf voice beamed across the room: "Good to see you, love! Can I get you a drink?" Joey had entered the club, giving Alf a little smile in response as she let her eyes search the room and found hers.

Joey came slowly towards her. "Can I join you?" She asked with an insecure, little smile. Charlie quickly patted the seat beside her. Joey almost landed in her lap, catching her by surprise. She scotched her bum onto the chough and her legs across hers. She put an arm around her neck, resting her head on her shoulder.

"I'm sorry Charlie," She whispered. "I didn't mean to shut you out."

"I know" Charlie replied, "but it hurt when you did. "She paused. "Joey, I don't hate you if that's what you're afraid of. You have nothing to be ashamed of; It's not your fault!" She felt tears find their familiar way down her cheeks. "I'm just so afraid of losing you… When you didn't breath back at the hotel, I felt like I was drowning too, and then you survived, but you didn't come back to me anyway. I'm still scared…"

Joey snuck her other arm around her waist. "I don't blame you if you don't want to be with me again, if I repulse you. I belonged to you, my body was yours. I didn't want to feel any other hands on me ever again than yours. I didn't want to feel any other body against mine than yours." She sobbed quietly into her shoulder. "He destroyed that, he destroyed me. I feel so dirty, so used. I don't see how you could ever be with me again when he…" she was shaking in her arms now, trying not to cry too loud.

Joey was shaking, she was afraid of how Charlie would react. She had to be disgusted with her. A hand reached under her chin, lifting it up until she met Charlie's eyes. She gently lowered her head placing a kiss on her lips. It told Joey more than words. Charlie still wanted her. She wasn't disgusted. She loved her despite everything.

"I love you Joey, nothing is ever going to change that! You are my everything; no one can take you away from me!" Charlie looked her straight in her eyes. The only thing shining through them was love. "I love you too," Joey replied, "I Just want you, I don't want to lose you! But it's hard, I can't seem to get rid of the feeling of him…" She stopped, just clinging to Charlie, her lifeline.

* * *

Charlie didn't know how long they'd been sitting there. Alf had given them both a drink, they had welcomed it, welcoming the feeling the alcohol gave. Alf came and interrupted them "Look love, I have to close this place, but why don't you take the keys and lock when you leave, you can stay for as long as you need." He gave her a pair of keys and placed a bottle of vine on the table."Enjoy!" He said, giving her an understanding smile before he turned and left.

They had been talking and crying. Joey sharing every little detail about the assault. Charlie listened and cried, and in between cursing Robbo up and down. Then they had talked more. Both of them sharing their fears and concerns.

"Hey, let's go home," Charlie said after hours of talking, two bottles of vine and a long time in silence, just holding each other, seeking comfort.

* * *

Joey entered the bedroom, closely followed by Charlie. She turned her back at her, found the PJ's she had started to use the last few nights. Before, neither of them used one. They had enjoyed the sensation of their bodies curled together with nothing to separate them.

Joey felt Charlie's hand on her arm, stopping her motions. "Don't!" Charlie whispered in her ear. "Let me!"

Joey felt a small strife of panic, but Charlie turned her around, put her arms around her waist. "Let me erase the memories," She said softly, staring into her eyes. All Joey could see was the love that flowed towards her through them. She slowly nodded. Charlie let their lips meet. Carefully she seeked entrance into her mouth. Joey gave it, unable to resist the feeling that Charlie's lips and tongue gave her. Feelings she didn't think she would be able to feel again.

Charlie lifted her hands slowly, not wanting to scare Joey with any sudden moves. Carefully she started to pull down the zipper of her hoodie. Letting her lips play with Joey's neck, she pushed it down from her shoulder. Gently she placed her hands on her hips, again kissing her passionately. She let her hands find their way under her t-shirt. Starting to pull it up, she felt Joey freeze.

"Joey, look at me!" "It's me, open your eyes!" Charlie cupped her hands around her face. "It's me," she repeated softly, "Focus on me!" She looked into goldenbrown eyes dazed from passion and fear. "Look at me "she repeated softly. Holding on to her eyes she lowered her hands and started to pull her shirt of her. "Just focus on me!"

Joey couldn't tear herself away from Charlie's eyes even if she'd wanted to. Her voice was almost hypnotic. She felt wave after wave of lust rush over her. Each wave washing away more of Robbo. She felt like Charlie was cleansing her.

She let her own hands unbutton Charlie's shirt. She leant in and kissed her neck. Letting her lips play on her skin. Her mouth filled with the sweet taste of Charlie, the unique taste she loved so much. She felt Charlie shaking under her touch. It filled her with relief and joy, Charlie still wanted her! She reached around to undo her bra.

Charlie felt Joeys arm reaching around her, undoing her bra. She reached around Joey and did the same. Pressing tightly together, nothing separated them. Collapsing on the bed, they continued undressing each other. The feeling of body on body sent sparks flying. Charlie rolled Joey under her. She lowered her head, kissing her, letting a hand find its way between them.

Joey moaned under her touch, wiggling to make it easier for her to find her way. Charlie stopped, looking into her eyes, eyes dark from passion. She leaned down to her ear, "I want to be inside of you!" She whispered softly.

"Yes... please..." Joey moaned back, welcoming her.


	10. Chapter 10

It was just one of those days where everything goes wrong. Charlie felt like she was stuck in Murphy's law, everything that can go wrong, went wrong! She rested her head in her hands, staring into the desktop, filled with paperwork, waiting for her to get to it. The sight didn't actually cheer her up. She pushed away from it, the back of the chair hitting the archive files behind her. She leaned her head back, closing her eyes.

The day had started with her oversleeping, she had become so used to Joey waking her, and now that she wasn't there, she just hadn't. Then she had stumped a toe on the dresser, causing the nail to split down the middle, it hurt like hell.

Then, finally getting to work, limping from having to squeeze into boots: a desk full of files, waiting to be handled. Starting to work on them, she had been abruptly interrupted by a voice from the reception area.

She had jumped up from her seat, jerked the door open, and saw the person she hated most in the world, walking out from the interrogation room. She'd frozen, not believing her own eyes. Then she charged at him, wanting nothing more than to beat his face into a pulp, before putting her hands around his throat and squeezing the life out of him.

Strong arms had stopped her from making thoughts into action. Two fellow officers had gotten a hold of her, hindering her reaching Robbo. She had screamed, kicked, and jerked, all to get away from them. They were too strong, even if they had their worked cut out for them holding her. The officers handling Robbo quickly dragged him out of there.

Seeing Robbo had been a shock, Watson had explained that he was to be transferred to a high security prison on the other side of the country, they just needed to get some paper fixed before he was sent off.

Seeing the creature that had caused Joey and her so much pain had been terrible, bringing everything back with full force. She had locked herself into her office. There she was sitting, just wanting to go home, find Joey and curl up in her arms, but she wasn't there.

She had left three days, four hours and, she checked her watch, seventeen minutes ago. She was attending a course to upgrade her boatlicense in a small town a few hours down the coast. She was due to get back the next day. She'd been wary of going, and Charlie didn't want her to either. It had only been a little more than a fortnight since Robbo assaulted her. She was still troubled with nightmares every night.

Charlie couldn't come with her, she'd taken a lot of time off work lately, and she couldn't take four days off to be with her. After some deliberation, they had decided that she should go. Ruby had volunteered to go with her, keeping her company. Charlie suspected that the thought of some time away from the pressure of being a senior was a part of her eagerness to go.

She had excused her from school. It was better that Ruby went with her than no one, and she had grown into quite a mature and sensible young woman.

Charlie missed Joey. They were rarely apart, if one had to go somewhere, the other would come with. When she thought about it, she couldn't remember the last night they weren't together.

She dragged herself back to reality, she had paperwork to do.

An hour later she threw the pen into the wall. She couldn't concentrate, the only thing she could think about was Robbo this morning. He hadn't smirked today, his face was full of hate. Oh, she wished she hadn't seen him. She hated what he had done to Joey. She wanted to get him back for it, but she couldn't even work on the case against him.

They were still struggling with the aftereffects the assault had on Joey. The nights were worst. Joey had nightmares, waking her up because she screamed. It always took a long time to calm her down again. She had nightmares herself, scenarios where she was too late to save Joey, or scenes where Robbo held Joeys head under water, laughing at her. She would wake up by Joey shaking her, cold sweating and heaving for air.

They would get as close as possible when this happened, both of them reassuring themselves that it had just been a dream, that they both where still there. It was hard on Ruby too, sleeping in the same house. It wasn't like she had impaired hearing, she heard the screaming at night too.

They were all tired, and Charlie hated that she couldn't come with Joey. Hated the thought of her having to deal with the nights on her own. Sure, Ruby was there, but that wasn't the same. She sighed, it was only one more night, and Joey would be back home with her again.

Charlie decided that there was no use staying at the office for the time being. She rose and headed for the diner to get a coffee.

* * *

"Hey Charlie, do you have time to join?" Aden called out, Charlie hadn't seen him. He was sitting at a table with Belle. She made her way over to them. "Hi, long time, no see Belle!" Charlie had never socialized with Belle and wasn't sure if this was the time to start.

"Hi!" She smiled back, "Join us!" She hesitated for a second, then deciding to do so. Aden started to talk about Belle. They had split up two years ago, but in course of time became friends. He told how she'd got a job in the city as a journalist in a major newspaper, that she was doing really well, had found a guy and so on. Charlie pretended to be interested and managed to nod and smile in the right places.

"How's things going with you and Joey?" Aden switched subjects. "Ehhh…" She glanced at Belle, "better I guess…"

"You see Charlie, I called and invited Belle here." Aden put a hand on hers. "You know I talked to Joey, telling her my story." Charlie knew, she was grateful to him for doing that. "You know my story," he continued, "but I thought maybe it would be good to hear what Belle went through when she found out."

Charlie wasn't sure she wanted to hear at all. She didn't know her, and what could they possibly have in common?

Belle started talking without waiting for her to give promision. "I think I know, at least partly, what you're going through." Charlie looked at her full of skepticism. Belle continued."I was in love with Aden, I wanted to be with him, I loved kissing him and touching him. I mean, "she glanced at Aden, "with that body, who could blame me!" She laughed, blushing a little.

"The thing was that he didn't want to touch me. I thought it was strange, that he didn't like me or something. Then one night we were in bed, he broke down and told me." She paused. "He was afraid, afraid that I would hate him ,that I didn't want to be with him. He felt used and dirty. All I was doing was loving him. I saw just Aden, to me he wasn't disgusting or anything." Charlie had leaned closer as Belle talked. She was describing exactly what Joey and she battled with.

"We slept together, it seemed to help him, but even after that he sometimes would jerk and pull away from me when I touched him, he couldn't control it. He sometimes scared me so bad at night when he had nightmares. He would throw his arms around, fighting an invisible enemy, he sometimes screamed, calling out for someone to stop. It was devastating. I felt like I couldn't reach him. When he pulled away from me, it was like he twisted a knife around in my heart. It hurt, I felt stupid and insufficient. I didn't know how to get him out of it."

Charlie had tears in her eyes, Belle was saying exactly what she felt. "How… how did you get him out of it?" She asked.

Aden answered:"she was patient, I knew it hurt her when I pulled away from her, when all I really wanted was to be with her, but it was like I couldn't control my actions. She was there, that's all. She was there, patient, talking to me, and gradually the physical memories of the abuse disappeared, if you know what I mean." Charlie looked at him, she knew exactly what he meant.

Joey had said the same thing about remembering his touch. It made sense that it was like a physical memory. She knew that she was removing those memories from Joey, replacing them with herself. She also knew that Joey couldn't control herself when she pulled away, but that didn't make it hurt less.

"How long did it take?" she asked Belle. "I really don't know, it was a process, sometimes it seemed he was over it, just to fall back again. Sometimes he fell so far that I thought I would never reach him again." She looked at her, put a hand on hers, "It will take time, but you will get there, Joey will get there!"

They had talked for a long time. It was good, she understood more of what Joey was going through, and it was nice to talk to someone who had been through what she was in the middle of. She was encouraged, determined not to give up.

She returned to the police station, she was off duty, but to go home alone wasn't what she wanted.

* * *

"Hey, this came for you!" An officer she hadn't seen before handed her a letter. "I'm Brian by the way, first day today!" He saluted her. She looked at the letter, surprised that it had been delivered here, she usually got all her mail at home.

She turned the envelope and smiled. It was addressed to Srg. Buckton, she immediately recognized the writing, it was Joeys.

She excused herself and retreated to her office. Tore the envelop open and started to read.

_My love_

Charlie smiled and placed her feet on the desk.

_I'm laying in bed, missing you like crazy. It's the first night away from you, and I can't imagine three more without you. Being away from you makes me realize how much you've done for me over the past few weeks. I haven't thanked you for that so; Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Without you I wouldn't be here today._

_You make me so happy! I can't even imagine that I had a life before you. I was alive, sure, but I didn't _live_. You gave me life._

_The first time I saw you I thought you were a figure of my imagination. Then you became my friend, my confidant, my love and love. I can't believe that I'm yours and you mine. I never thought it could actually be. _

_It is! And my heart feels like it's jumping out of my chest. All I want to do is get up and run home to you, get into bed with you, holding you, never letting you go again!_

_I know that I have hurt you these past few weeks, and I'm sorry. You are so patient and gentle with me. You get me over Robbo. You remove the feeling of him. Replacing them with the wonderful feeling of your fingers caressing me. The feeling of your body against mine, nothing separating us. I have never felt what I feel with you before. You light my fire deeper and stronger than I thought possible. I can never get enough of you._

_I hurt you because sometimes when you touch me I flinch. I can't help it, it's out of my control. I don't want to! I want you to touch me, always, whenever, wherever. Please don't give up on me!_

_I love you more than words can ever express. You make me feel loved. You take care of me, make me feel safe. Nothing can hurt me when I'm with you. You make me feel beautiful, like I'm the most wonderful woman on earth. _

_You know you're wrong on that point…_You _are the most wonderful woman on this planet. You are beautiful! You take my breath away. Just a glance from you and the world is spinning. I can hardly breathe when you're around, that's what you always do to me. _

_When you hold me at night, you're my lifeline. When you smile, you put the sun to shame. Your eyes remind me of the sea, always shifting color, pulling me into the deep. Your beauty is more breathtaking than the sunset. I love you, I will always love you. Now and forever!_

Charlie bit her lip, she was overwhelmed by love. Reading this from Joey made it all worth it! She leaned her head back for a while, enjoying the rush of feelings, good feelings. She continued reading.

_How can I even begin to describe your beauty? You're perfect. When you enter a room, all I can see is you. Your hair shining, flowing down your back, just make me want to burry my hands in it, feeling the texture. Your neck enticing me, make me want to taste you. Your perfectly sculpted arms, holding me, touching me. Your hands bring me to the stars again and again. They do magic with me, cause feelings a human body shouldn't be able to feel. You touch me deeper than I thought possible. _

_Your legs, oh my… Perfection! I can't believe that those legs are wrapped around me at night. I sometimes think I'm dreaming when I see you laying beside me. When I curl up behind you…_

"I just want to put my arms around you, holding you tighter…" Charlie jumped, she hadn't heard Joey entering her office. She'd come up behind her, looking at the letter, continued it when she was about to turn the page.

"Oh Joey! You're back!" She exclaimed. "I couldn't stay away longer, Ruby and I took the bus early. She's probably with Xavier by now." Joey smiled down at her.

She pulled Charlie away from the desk, placing herself on her lap. "Your lips sweeter than sugar. She leaned in and kissed her deeply. "Your tongue drives me wild, causing fire to rush through my body." Kissing her again, seeking into her mouth, playing with her, sending fire raging through her.

Joey lifted her head, eyes filled with passion and love. Reflecting her own. "your breasts enticing me, perfectly curved, I can't keep my hands and lips away.." She whispered, starting to unbutton her shirt, letting her hands reached their wanted destination. Unable to speak she let her lips show in action what she wanted to say.

Charlie was overwhelmed by the feelings Joey kindled in her. She had missed her so much. She realized that she had missed her for longer than just three days. She felt that _her_ Joey was back! Feeling her hands and her lips following up the words she spoke, made her forget where she was.

She let her hands run over Joey, pulling her shirt up, letting her hands find their way to reflect what Joey did to her. She moved her hand down to her bum, she loved the curves. She pulled her closer, letting her hands wander to the front, starting to open her zipper. Joey moaned under her touch. "Keep going! Oh, don't stop!"

Joey let her lips explore Charlie's shoulders and neck, pushing her uniformshirt half way down her arms. She pulled down the straps on her bra, letting her lips follow down her shoulder.

A knock at the door startled both of them. "Sergeant, are you there?" They froze, then they started to giggle. "I locked the door" Joey whispered into her ear.

"Ehh… I'll be right out!" Charlie called back, red as a lobster.

"I don't want to let you go!" Joey kissed her again, continuing caressing her.

"Let's get home!" She answered, not letting Joey go either. Joey touching her, kissing her sent her spinning. Her hands played her like a skilled musician would play an instrument. Knowing exactly what to do, where to touch to send her flying.

She forced their lips apart. "Let's get home, then we don't have to end this."

Driving home was the most difficult task Charlie had performed in her life. All her senses were filled with Joey. She thanked god for wearing pants. Joey had let her hand play on her thigh from the moment they entered the car. In return, she let her hand find its way between Joey's legs. She had first done it to get back at her, but realized she just made it worse for herself, the combined feeling of Joeys hand and her own made it impossible to concentrate on the driving.

After some hazardous driving they reached home. They kissed from the second they stepped out of the car, to stumbling up to the front door. Finally getting it open, they almost fell inside. Closing the door behind her, Joey turned, looked at her with eyes full of love and passion. "I love you so much!" she said in between showering kisses over her face.

"Now, where was I?" She smiled playfully, opened her shirt and continued exactly where she had left off. "I love you too!" Charlie replied, pulling her head closer.


	11. Chapter 11

_Thank you all for the great reviews! I'm glad you enjoy it! This chapter is kind of mushy, now you are warned:)_  
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* * *

_

A tune filled the room, Charlie was half asleep, laying on the chough. There was something familiar with that song. She remembered. It was the song from the boat, when she realized she was in love with Joey, and stupidly ran away from her.

A head appeared over the back of the chough, Joey smiled down at her, leaned over and gave her a kiss. "Do you remember this song?" Joey asked. "How can I ever forget, I realized I loved you to that tune." Charlie put her hand around Joey's neck, pulling her in for another kiss.

"Well, I've got tickets for a concert with the band, they are playing this Friday in the city…"Joey hesitated for a second. "Oh, I'd love to go!" Charlie grinned, "I want to go with you!"

"There's only one thing… They are playing in a gay club…" Joey looked at her to see the reaction. They had never been to a gay club or bar before. Charlie bit the inside of her lower lip. Then she broke out in a big smile: "I'll go anywhere with you!" Kissing Joey again. "But if anyone hits on you, I'm going to arrest them and make sure they are locked away for a long time!"

Joey laughed, jumped over the back of the chough, placing herself on top of Charlie, "If anyone tries to pick you up, I'm going to do terrible things to them! I learned a trick or two working on trawlers!" Joey smiled down at her, weaving her hands into Charlie's hair, kissing her yet again. "Mmmmm, I can never get enough of you!"

* * *

Joey had to giggle at Charlie; she was trying to figure out what to wear. "So, Joey… what does people wear to a gay club?" She looked at her, joking, but whit a hint of seriousness. "Preferably nothing!" Joey couldn't help but tease her. "But since there's going to be other people there, I take a rain check on you without clothes!"

Charlie laughed, charged at her, which resulted in Joey landing on her back with Charlie sitting on top of her, holding her down and starting a tickle attack. She screamed and wiggled to get away, laughing so hard that it was nearly impossible to seriously do anything about it.

Charlie gave up, lay down on top of her, and rested her head on her shoulder. "I have to confess, Joey, I am a little nervous about going to a gay club. You know, I have never been to one before. I don't quite know what do expect…"

"I know, it's nothing to worry about. There are just people like you and me. The great thing is that no one is going to pay us any attention." Joey explained. "Except that everyone are going to be mesmerized by your beauty." She grinned, turned her head and kissed her on the forehead.

Charlie liked the thought of not attracting attention to them. In the Bay they were accepted, but they were always noticed. As she thought about it, she started to look forward to the evening more and more. "Well, I know with whom I'm leaving!" She lifted her head, staring into goldenbrown eyes. "I'm leaving with the most beautiful girl I've ever seen!"

She gave Joey a kiss, Joey answered by letting her hands wander up under her shirt, enjoying the feeling of warm, soft skin. "I think I look most forward to the hotel," Joey whispered, "because then I can do this again!" she let her hands wander over Charlie's body, setting her on fire. "I think I agree!" Charlie let her hands wander too.

* * *

Inside the club, Charlie held on to Joey's hand. Looking around, curious, it was kind of strange. Joey turned to her, "what do you think so far?" "ehh… I'm not su…"Joey interrupted her by giving her a long, deep kiss. "What do you think now?" She lifted one of her eyebrows, smiling cheeky. Charlie looked around, no one paid them any attention. She turned to Joey, "I think I like it!" and returned the kiss.

They found their way to the bar and got drinks. "I just have to fix something, I'll be right back!" Joey gave her a quick kiss and without further ado, she vanished. Charlie stared after her, feeling a little lost. She concentrated on her drink.

"Hi, do you mind if I join you?" A voice made her reappear from her drink. Before she could answer, a blond woman sat down beside her. "I haven't seen you here before, where you from?" Charlie was a little flabbergasted, trying to answer but all she managed was a few stutters.

"I have to say, if you allow me, you're gorgeous! We have to have a dance later!" Charlie felt her cheeks burn. "ehh…uhm… thank you, I guess…" She glanced over to the woman next to her. She was beautiful too, but not like her Joey. Charlie looked around for her. She was nowhere to be seen. It was weird to be hit on by a woman, and she wanted Joey to "rescue" her.

"You know, since it's your first time here, I can give you the grand tour, introduce you to some people. I'm Sandy by the way!" She reached out her right hand. Charlie looked at it as if she didn't understand what to do with it. Finally shaking hands with her, she stuttered: "ehhh… Charlie here…" Her hand was thoroughly shaken. "It's a pleasure meeting you!" Sandy smiled and revealed a perfect row of pearly whites.

A pair of arms grabbed Charlie from the back, a kiss landed on her shoulder, she whirled around, looking directly into an annoyed face. "I'm sorry, whoever you are, "Joey stared at the blond bombshell that she had seen hitting on Charlie. "She's mine!"

"Well, if you care for a dance later…" Sandy shrugged her shoulders, smiled at Charlie and left.

Charlie giggled, she liked a possessive Joey. "Seriously, I can't even leave you alone for five minutes without someone hitting on you!" Joey paused a little, "did… did you like her?" She stared into the floor. Charlie giggled, put her hand under her chin. "You know the only one I like are you!" She kissed her, "and seriously, no one here can compete with you, if I compare, they all fall through! I love you!" She smiled and kissed her again.

"OK, ladies and ladies! Please welcome Blanche Dubois!" The voice of the confransiere boomed through the club. "Hey, let's dance!" Joey grabbed her by the hand, and she didn't have to ask twice.

Gentle tunes from a guitar filled the room, encouraging to slowdance. Joey and Charlie danced in a tight embrace, "This is so wonderful!" Charlie whispered. "I could dance like this forever!" She kissed her yet again. "It's such a relief to be able to kiss you, hold you, touch you without anyone caring. We should have done this a long time ago!" She let action follow words.

Soft voices flowed through the air. Lyrics that captivated her, it was songs about how she had felt about Joey. Words describing doubt and concerns that she had when she first fell in love with her. it brought tears to her eyes. She cupped Joey's face in her hands, staring into her eyes: "I'm so happy that I got you. I don't understand how I could be so lucky to get someone like you. I love you more than words can say!"

Joey stared back, drowning in the deep blue eyes she was staring into. "I still sometimes have to pinch myself when I wake up in the morning with you curled up with me. You are so beautiful, you have a body like a goddess," Joey let her hand run over the described object. "Not only that, you are beautiful on the inside too. You are caring, warm, passionate, funny, loyal, sexy… I love you more than I knew possible!" She kissed her deep and long.

"We had a request before the show started" One of the singers voice interrupted them. "Someone wanted to share something here tonight, come on up!"

Joey grinned at Charlie, gave her a short peck on the lips and jumped up on stage. Charlie was staring after her, shocked.

"I have a girl" Joey talked into the microphone, her voice filled the whole place. She was met with applause and someone shouted "Too bad!"

She giggled and continued:"Almost three years ago, I fell in love with the most beautiful woman in the world. She was perfect, I didn't think I stood a chance with her. She was there for me when I went through some rough patches. I fell head over heels in love with her!" Charlie felt her cheeks burn.

"One day I took her out on the boat I now work on. We had a lovely afternoon. We talked, laughed and danced. Then this song came on, it was magic. That was the day I was sure I loved her, not only that, it was the day she realized she loved me!" Joey caught Charlie's eyes, stretched out her hand towards her. Charlie was drawn to it as if it was a magnet. Their hands met, Joey pulled her up on stage with her. "This is my girl!" She exclaimed, pulling her close and kissed her.

Charlie had been caught by surprise by Joey jumping up on stage, realizing this was the reason for her disappearing act. She blushed listening to Joey's voice, remembering that day as if it was yesterday. Joey caught her eyes, she was drawn to her by an invisible force. Up on stage all she could see was Joey. She didn't care where she was. She answered Joey's kiss with all the love and passion she had for her.

Slowly they were pulled back to reality by whistling, applause and people cheering. Charlie blushed and felt an urgent need to share her love with the world. She grabbed the hold of the microphone: "_This_ is _my_ girl!"

"Charlie, this song is for you, not because "love only hurts," but because it was the beginning of the amazing life we now share!" With tears in her eyes, she kissed her again before they left the stage to the band.

Joey rested her hands on Charlie's waist as they slowly moved to the music. "I can't say it too often, I love you Charlie Buckton!" Charlie had draped her arms around Joey's neck. "It has been a long way, but we have made it through a lot of rough patches. So many times I've been afraid of losing you."

"Joey Collins, you are stuck with me, I love you too much to ever let you go!"

They kissed, trying to convey all their love for another into it.

* * *

They walked to the hotel, arms around each other. Walking in silence they both enjoyed the feeling of just being close. Finally arriving in their room, they fell into each other's embrace. "I want this to last forever. I want to hold you and feel you." Joey whispered into Charlie's ear. "I want you, I want to be in your arms, always!"

"I can never get enough of you…you know that... I want to taste you…enjoy you… and be with you." Charlie kissed her in between each statement.

Joey pulled up her dress, kneeling down, showering kisses over the soft skin of her stomach. Letting her lips following her hands, lifting the dress over her head. Charlie started to unbutton Joeys shirt, letting lips play with the skin she reviled. "You are so beautiful, you taste so incredible sweet!" Charlie could hardly utter the words as passion filled her.

Collapsing on the bed, they continued enjoying each other. Hands and lips finding familiar paths and spots, setting each other on fire. Passion filling their bodies, hands reaching warm and moist places. Driving each other higher and deeper.

They disappeared from the world as all their senses were filled with the one they loved.


	12. Chapter 12

Charlie was exhausted. There had been an altercation in Yabbie Creek, she had started on her regular afternoon shift yesterday, then this had happened, and she had to pull an all nighter. Now it was 9 a.m., and all she wanted to do was to go home to Joey. She just had a little bit of paperwork to finish before she could leave.

"Hey, I thought you might be interested in this;" Watson put her head in, holding a file."They have set a date for the courtcase against Robbo."

Charlie jumped up and snatched it out of her hands. "When did this come?" she asked. "Ehhh… I think yesterday, I'm not sure…" Charlie's phone rang, interrupting Watson.

"Srg. Buckton," Charlie answered, "Alf, what can I help you with?" her face whitened, "No, I haven't seen her, I haven't been home…it's not like her not to show up for work… I call you later." She hang up. "I…I…I got to go home," she ran out the door before she had finished the sentence.

Speeding towards her house all kinds of thoughts ran through her head. Robbo had escaped, she had fallen in the ocean, she had been hit by a car…

She tried to calm herself down. Joey had probably just overslept, or she had lost track of time. She knew that wasn't the case, Joey never overslept, she was the kind of person who were up before the birds.

She ran into the house, calling Joey's name. There were no answer. She noticed three empty bottles of vine on the kitchen floor. She thought it was strange, Joey didn't drink much.

She checked the bedroom, her heart froze at the sight that met her. Joey was lying in bed, fully dressed, motionless. Charlie rushed over to her, shaking her to wake her up. There was no response, the smell of alcohol was strong.

Charlie turned her over, slapped her in the face, "Joey, come on, wake up!" She didn't move a muscle. Charlie felt for a pulse, she did have one. Her eyes fell on the floor next to the bed. An empty bottle of vodka lay next to some papers.

She picked them up. She knew that the bottle had been full. They didn't drink vodka, some friends had just given it to them. If Joey had finished all that vine and this in addition, she was in trouble. She looked at the papers, it was a letter informing about the courtcase, she knew what had happened. Charlie picked up her phone, "I need an ambulance…"

* * *

Joey came home from a day on the sea. It had been glorious. She had taken out a couple who celebrated their 25th anniversary. They had been lovely, shearing some of the things they had experienced together. They made her dream about what Charlie and she would be doing on their 25th anniversary.

She tied up the boat, followed the couple up to their car, and whished them a memorable evening. She walked back home, wondering whether she should pay Charlie a visit at work, then decided that she would rather spend the rest of the evening doing something special for her. It was already 8p.m. so it wouldn't be more than a couple of hours before she'd be home anyway.

She picked up the mail on her way into the house. She shuffled quickly through it, there was never anything interesting anyway. She stopped the shuffling as she saw her name on a brown envelope, looking official. She dropped the rest of the mail on the kitchen table. With shivering hands, she tore it open.

_Ms. Joey Collins_

_I hereby inform you that the court case against Robert Hanson is set to…_

Joey stared down at the letter, every memorie from the assaults came rushing back. The feeling of him touching her, the feeling of water entering her lounges…

Joey felt panic engulf her. She couldn't think, she just wanted to get away from the memories. Shaking and out of control, she opened the cupboard where they stored vine. She took a bottle, opened it, put it to her mouth and drank. She was desperate to get rid of her thoughts.

She reached for her phone, dialed Charlie's number, no answer. She sank down on the floor, with her back to the counter. Why did this have to come now? She didn't want to repeat everything that had happened to a crowded courtroom. She didn't want to relive what Robbo had done to her. She drank more.

She couldn't move, she couldn't think. She had flashes running through her head of Robbo. She got a new bottle, drinking, trying to erase the images. She had no sense of time, she kept drinking. She finally pulled herself up from the floor, stooping over as she rose. She had never been this drunk before, she could hardly make out which room she was in. still visions of Robbo swirled through her head. She grabbed another bottle, stumbling into the bedroom.

She sat down on the bed. Her head spinning, but she couldn't stop the thoughts rushing. She drank to get away, to forget, but it didn't work. She drank until darkness covered her.

* * *

Charlie wandered up and down a corridor she didn't want to wander in, one corner of her lips pulled up, she had done this too many times. She wanted to run into the examination room, grab a hold of Joey's shoulder and shake her. Way on earth didn't she call her?

She checked her phone, her heart sank. There was a missed call from Joey. She had been occupied with the altercation, she didn't even have her phone with her.

Rachel came through the doors, "Hi, she's out of the woods." Charlie felt relief rush through her. "She had alcohol poisoning, but we pumped her stomach, gave her charcoal, and now she's sleeping." Rachel took a step closer. "May I ask what brought this on? I mean, she doesn't normally have more than a few beers, and maybe a drink or two." She was concerned. She knew Joey well, both from being a good friend, and being her doctor.

"A letter came yesterday, "Charlie paused. "I was at work, caught up in some mess in Yabbie Creek. She called me, I didn't see it before just now." She looked at Rachel. "It was a letter with the date for the courtcase… I guess it was too much for her…" A single tear escaped her eye.

"yeah… I can see that," Rachel placed a hand on her shoulder, "Let me take you to see her."

Joey looked small and fragile lying in bed. Charcoal had run down her cheek, creating a grey path down to her ear. Charlie felt tears burning behind her eyes. She sat down in a chair next to the bed. She looked at her, biting on one of her fingernails.

Why did she drink that amount of alcohol? How could she do this to herself, and to her? Her feelings swayed from deep concern to anger. Would she be OK? Didn't Joey realize just how scared she would be? How could she put her through this again?

Her thoughts wandered to the courtcase. Why on earth hadn't they told her first, then she could break it gently to Joey. Why hadn't the idiots on the station given her the file when she came to work yesterday?

Her thoughts were interrupted by Ruby entering the room. "I got your message, sorry I had a test I had to finish before I could come. She was still in her uniform. "How's she doing?" Ruby looked at Joey, she didn't look good at all.

"She's doing OK, She drank too much. Didn't you see her last night?" Charlie stared at her sister. "I'm sorry, I didn't, I came in pretty late. I assumed she had gone to bed." Ruby replied.

"Yeah, sorry, it's Ok. Anyway, she drank way too much. She got alcohol poisoning. She's sleeping it off at the moment." Charlie sighed. "I have been in here way to often!"

* * *

Someone was doing their best to make her head explode. Joey tried to open her eyes, but the pain in her head hit new levels as light made contact with the nerves in them. She groaned. Her throat hurt as well. She tried to swallow. It was dry and sore, as if someone had pushed a tube down it.

She felt a cool hand on her forehead. "Hey, Joey, good to see you awake!" It was a familiar voice, she knew she'd heard it before. She tried to gather her thoughts, it was impossible. "Ehhh…"She croaked.

"You're in hospital," another familiar voice, "you probably have quite a sore throat, we had to pump you. And you'll have the mother of all hangovers."

Hospital, why was she in hospital? Once again she tried to open her eyes. She managed a squint, it hurt!

The room swam, there were to figures standing next to her. She couldn't make out who they were. She blinked a few times, her vision improved. She recognized the one leaning over her "Charlie, "she croaked, it was hard to get words out. "What… why…"

"Oh Joey, you drank too much, I found you this morning, I'm sorry, I had to pull an all nighter." Charlie stroke her over the head. "Why did I..? I can't remember…" Joey tried to concentrate enough to make some sense out of everything.

"We can talk about that later, you should just rest now." Joey could hear in Charlie's voice that something was wrong. She twisted her brain, trying to find something that could explain what happened. She had been on the boat. Then she had gone home to wait for Charlie. She found the mail… suddenly it all came rushing back.

"No no no…no…" Images started to rush trough her head again. "No…"

Charlie leaned over Joey, seeing that her eyes were glazed, she didn't recognize her. Slowly she started to focus, her eyes became clear. She whispered her name, it was a relief.

Joey asked questions she didn't want to answer, she avoided them, and just tried to comfort her. She could see in her eyes that she was searching through her brain to find answers herself. Charlie hoped she didn't find them, not now, they could talk later.

The look that came in Joeys eyes scared her. She disappeared into a nightmare, Charlie tried to pull her out. She had remembered the reason for her being there. The screams of panic tore her heart to shreds. She grabbed a hold of Joey.

Words from the conversations she had with Belle and Aden a few weeks ago flowed through her mind. "I felt useless… It seemed to help…He fell so far that I felt I couldn't reach him… process…" She felt totally helpless. There was nothing she could do.

Rachel rushed out to get some sedative to calm Joey down. Charlie held Joey tight as she relived the horrors she had been through not that long ago. Charlie cried with her, wanting nothing more than to pull her out of it, unable to reach her.

Rachel came back in with something to settle Joey. She cried still, her eyes didn't see this world. Rachel gave her a shot, and it took only minutes before she calmed down. "It's really mild, It only takes the edge of." She explained to Charlie.

Joey felt the panic leave her. She realized that Charlie was holding her, stroking her arm. She was suddenly filled with disgust over herself. How on earth could Charlie stand to touch her? She felt tears running down her face. She jerked away from Charlie's touch. She couldn't stand it. She felt dirty. "Don't touch me!" She snarled her. Rolling over on her side, back against Charlie.

"Don't touch me!" The words felt like thousand arrows piercing her heart. Charlie couldn't believe her own ears. She touched her shoulder, "Joey, don't push me away!" There was no response. "We have been through so much Joey, you know the only way we can get through this is together!" Joey didn't say a word, she just jerked her shoulder away from her hand.

It was too much for Charlie, it was just too much. She exploded with anger."You know, I can't take this. I can't watch you go through this if you don't let me help you. I can't look at you destroying yourself, and there's nothing I can do!" She was burning with anger, turned around on her heels and left the room, slamming the door shut behind her.


	13. Chapter 13

_Thank you all for the great reviews, I'm still really glad you all enjoy this:)

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Joey felt large, warm tears running down her cheek. How could she be so stupid. She didn't want to push Charlie away, she just felt so disgusted with herself. All she really wanted to do was to throw herself into the arms of the one she loved. Letting Charlie erase all bad things, feeling secure and loved in her embrace. She kicked herself mentally over her own stupid actions that she didn't have any control over.

She hadn't ment to jerk away from her hand, she just couldn't stand the feeling of a touch. It wasn't Charlie she pulled away from. Charlie, her heart cried after her as she slipped away into a dreamless sleep.

* * *

Charlie had stormed out of the room, she couldn't stand it any longer. She ran straight into Ruby. "Hey, what's going on?" She looked surprised. Charlie didn't want to talk to her. "Nothing" she replied without looking at her.

"Don't you think I know you well enough to know when you lie?" Ruby lifted one of her eyebrows as she challenged her. "I can see that's something's going on!"

Charlie exploded."It's none of your damn business, I can't stand this any longer, I'm out of here!" She marched off.

Ruby stared after her, shocked by her sister's outburst.

Charlie ran out from the hospital, jumped into her car and took off. She was angry and she was hurt. She didn't pay any attention to her driving, all she could think about was how Joey had pushed her away. They had been through so much together, together, was the key word. How could Joey forget that?

She woke up from her thoughts as a car honked, she was steering right at it. She threw the wheel around, just missing the oncoming vehicle. She pulled over to the side and stopped. Her heart beating heavy in her chest. She leaned her head on the wheel, trying to settle her racing heart.

"What the hell am I doing?" She gave herself a slap over the head. "You idiot, you're out here feeling sorry for yourself while the woman you love is fighting to overcome traumas from being raped and drowned!" she gave herself a mental bashing. "We have come this far together, I'm surely not giving up now. So it hurts a little, but it doesn't come close to what she is feeling!" She lectured herself. Started the car again and returned to the hospital.

* * *

Joey woke up. The hammering in her head had receded to just a few blows behind her eyes every now and then. She lifted it carefully, looking around the room. The only one there was Ruby, sleeping in a chair. "Shit" she said to herself, she remembered what happened. She had turned away from Charlie, shut her out. How could she be so stupid? Why couldn't she control her actions? She had pushed her away, and she had left.

Tears filled her eyes, Charlie was angry. She didn't blame her, she would have been too if it had been the other way around. She lifted her hands to dry the tears off. She sniffed and the sound woke Ruby.

"Hi, how are you feeling?" She asked while she stretched, "ohh, I must have fallen asleep!" She finished with a yawn.

"where's… where's Charlie?" Joey asked.

"Well… I don't…I don't know." Ruby decided that it was best to be honest. "She was pretty upset when she ran out of here, she almost ran me down, but I don't know where she went."

* * *

Charlie was sitting in her car outside the hospital. She tried to sort out all the thoughts in her head.

Questions she didn't want to answer rushed through her head. The decision didn't seem so clear anymore. She had been scared by the near hit witht that car, but now that it was wearing off, she started to doubt. Could she face being rejected by Joey? She loved her, but to see her like this was incredible painful, and if she wouldn't let her in, could she be there and watch Joey struggle?

She looked at the ring on her finger. The ring Joey had given her. Slowly she pulled it off, looking on the inside, she knew what was inscribed, "Yours." Charlie felt tears running down her cheeks. She had never cried as much as she did after meeting Joey. She used to have control over her feelings, putting them under lock. After Joey, she couldn't do that anymore, Joey had broken through her walls.

She was interrupted of a knock on the car window. Leah was standing on the outside. Quickly she dried the tears off, leaned over the passenger seat and opened the door. Leah entered "Are you OK?" She asked with the worried crease between her eyebrows.

Charlie looked at the ring she was holding between her fingers, "I don't know." She looked at Leah. " I don't know if I can do this…"

Leah saw Charlie twisting the ring round and round. She didn't know what she was thinking. "Ruby told me what happened, the date for the court case and Joey drinking…" Leah placed a hand on Charlie's fiddling ones.

Charlie didn't say a word, she stared straight ahead, not seeing a thing. All she could see and hear was Joey's face as she snarled to her, "Don't touch me!" Tears started to run again.

She turned to Leah, eyes filled with pain. "She locks me out. She doesn't want me to touch her, to talk to her… I don't know if it's worth it."She found Leah's eyes. "It sounds awful, but I don't know if I can do this again." As Charlie started to talk it felt like floodgates breaking, everything rushed out of her.

"I thought we had overcome this, or at least were making good progress. We've had a great time lately, we even went to a gay club in the city, it was one of the most wonderful evenings we've ever had. Joey was funny, romantic, she pledge her love for me on stage. I felt like the luckiest woman in the world."

"How could she do this to me? I know it's hard, but she can't do this on her own. I can't let her do it. If I'm to stay with her, she has to let me be there for her. It hurts too much just to watch and not be able to do anything."

"What if I'm not able to help her, what if she's never able to get past Robbo? Can I live with her flinching if I touch her unexpectantly? I want to be able to come up behind her, put my arms around her without her freezing. Can I live with seeing panic in her eyes sometimes when we're together, because a flash of Robbo runs through her head?"

"It hurts so bad when that happens. It's only for a second, but I see it. It makes me feel insufficient, why am I not able to erase the memories from her?" With that, she leaned into Leah sobbing.

Leah felt her heart ache for the woman she held. She knew everything the couple had been through. She understood where Charlie was coming from, this was hard. "You know Charlie, I have watched the two of you from the very beginning." She put a hand under Charlie's chin to get eye contact. "I've been there for every rough patch that the two of you have gone trough. I've seen how happy you are together, and I've seen how hurt you have been on Joey's behalf." She paused a little.

"You have gone through it together. I couldn't believe my ears that day when I heard she had been attacked by Robbo again. I can't comprehend what Joey had to endure. It was hard, it hurt, but you made it. You got through it. This is a fall back, yes, but she's not beyond reach. Charlie you got to believe that!"

"You know, if you give up now, you will never forgive yourself, and it would mean that Robbo won… is that what you want?" Charlie listened to Leah, knowing she was right. She breathed deep, "no, that's not what I want…" " I just don't know if I have strength to do this…"

Leah placed her hand on her check, "You know, if you need to talk, or whatever, I'm always her for you, for both of you!" She smiled and went out of the car.

Charlie looked at the ring she was still holding in her hand, she put it back on her finger. She searched for the strength she knew she would need to face what was coming. Could she take it if Joey pushed her away again? She sighed, well, it was only one way to find out.

* * *

She knocked on the door, opened it and peaked in. Ruby jumped up as soon as she saw her, "I'm leaving you to it!" She excused herself and left.

Charlie walked over to Joey's bedside. "Joey" "Charlie" they spoke simultaneously. "No, let me speak first," Charlie took the lead.

"Joey, you can't shut me out of this. I love you, and to see you go through this is hell for me. If you don't let me be here for you, I don't know if I can be here at all. I can't sit passive, see you hurting and not be able to comfort you, to help you through this. I love you more than I have words to explain, I can't sit back, watching you struggle and not be able to reach you" Charlie sat down on her bed, grabbing a hold of her hand.

"Charlie, I'm so sorry. " A tear found its way down her cheek. "I didn't mean to push you away, I just couldn't control myself." She held Charlie's hand firmer. "I'm sorry I scared you… Yesterday, I freaked out. The letter brought back all the memories from… I couldn't think, I just wanted to get rid of them. I tried to call you, but you didn't answer." Joey closed her eyes.

"I didn't see the call before this morning, I had to go to Yabbie Creek, it took all night" Charlie felt terrible guilty.

"It's OK, it wasn't your fault. Anyway, all I wanted was to get rid of the pictures, so I drank till I passed out..." Joey sighed. "I honestly thought I was over it, that I had put it all behind me… I guess I was wrong… "She was really crying now. "I feel so ashamed, I can't believe I let it happened again!"

"Oh, Joey, you didn't let it happen, you know that! You have nothing to be ashamed of!" Charlie pulled Joey up, held her tight, arms wrapped around her.

"I pushed you away because I feel so dirty, I didn't want you to touch me because I 'm so disgusted with myself." Joey grabbed a hold of Charlie's shirt in the back. "I need you, I can't do this on my own. Please be patient with me!"

"We have been through this before, we can get through it again. Joey, I'm here, I won't let you go. Just promise me you talk to me, always, no matter what's going on! I will be here for you, don't push me away anymore!"

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	14. Chapter 14

_Thank you for all reviews. I'm delighted that you all like it! enjoy:)  
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"It's so wonderful to go away with you!" Joey rested her head on Charlie's shoulder. "I have never been outside Australia, and now we are traveling to the other side of the world." Joey raised her head and looked into Charlie's blue eyes, smiling at her. "You know, I would be grateful if we just took the car and found a private beach somewhere."

Charlie leaned in and kissed her, "I know, but I think it will do us all good to get far away from everything for a while!" She smiled and kissed her again. A little cough interrupted them. "Excuse me, would you like a glass of wine?" The flight attendant stood over them with a bottle of wine, ready to pour.

"Ehh… Sure, thank you!" Charlie nodded. "And you too?" He turned to Ruby and Leah on the opposite seats. "Not for you Rubs, you're not eighteen yet!" Charlie pulled up her stern sister look. "Oh, come on, it's only two weeks left!" Ruby complained. "Sorry, we can't serve anyone underage anyway," The attendant interrupted.

"OK," she didn't look happy, I'm just gonna watch the stupid movie!" she sank into her seat. "Or you can be polite and talk to Leah, I'm sure you have loads to share with her!" Charlie smiled, she knew Ruby was just pretending to be upset. Ruby couldn't hide a smile, "OK, yeah I do," She turned to Leah, and it didn't take long before they were wrapped up in conversation.

Charlie turned her attention to Joey again. Lifted her arm, and invited her to curl up at her side. Joey didn't hesitate, she curled up, found her hand and started to kiss her fingers one by one. "I'm so happy with you, and now that the court case is over, maybe we can finally put all this behind us." Joey concentrated on following the lines in her palm with her lips.

"I really hope so, this hasn't exactly been easy." She sighed, "but we're here now, we have been trough the worst of it."

"Yeah…" Joey stopped kissing her hand and entwined their fingers instead. She let her mind wander back. The drinking episode had taught her that she couldn't take Charlie for granted, She shouldn't take her for granted. She had started to make a real effort to include Charlie in everything she felt and thought. It had been difficult because she couldn't get rid of the feeling that it somehow had to be her fault.

Charlie had the patience of an angel, and repeated over and over that it wasn't her fault, it wasn't something wrong with her. Slowly the thought of it being her fault disappeared.

When Robbo had been sentenced in court, it was like all of the guilt was put in the right place. It was Robbo's fault, he was the one that was sick. He was the one that had to take the punishment. It had been a relief to know that she would never see him again.

"Charlie, I can never thank you enough for being here for me. I know I haven't made it easy for you, but I'm so grateful for everything!" She lifted her hand and kissed it.

"Joey, I asked you to talk to me, always, about everything, and you did. It hasn't been easy, but you letting me be there for you, sharing your feelings with me. Well, we have come a long way!" Charlie tilted her head and rested her cheek on Joey's head.

It hadn't been easy. Joey did talk to her, but it hurt when she seemed unable to get the thought of it being her fault out of her head. Sometimes she wanted to slap her, and she told her that. She figured if she wanted Joey to talk about everything, then she had to do the same. Slowly the thought pattern changed, and seeing Robbo judged kind of released her.

It had been two weeks since the case ended. They were both emotionally drained. Having to testify in court had been terrible for both of them. Joey having to repeat everything in front of a crowded room, Charlie having to sit and listen, every word cut into her soul, hurting her on behalf of Joey and herself. She didn't want to believe it was true, even though she knew it was. Hearing it in court made it so much more real.

But it also gave a closure, both of them relieved over Robbo 's sentence, he wouldn't get away with it, he would pay!

"Charlie, I'm going to leave it all behind. I don't want Robbo to control my life anymore. I don't want him to decide what I feel, how I react, what I think. That's giving him power, and he doesn't have any power over me, not anymore."Joey held Charlie's hand in a firm grip. "I don't think I can wait and see where the process takes me. I have to decide that he has no control."

Charlie was relieved. She had waited for this. She had talked to a lot of rape victims in her job, and she had enough knowledge of counseling that she knew this was the most important step to take, to decide not to be a victim anymore.

"I'm so glad to hear that!" She said softly, "You know, that's the most important decision to make."

Joey raised her head from its resting place, turning to her. "I love you, you know that. I'm not going to let anything hinder me from showing you that I do!" She leaned in and kissed her.

"I love you too!" She kissed her back, letting lips and tongue tell the rest. They let tongues play, setting each other on fire. Joey pulled back, lifted one of her eyebrows: "Are you a member of the "mile high" club?" she asked with a cheeky grin. Charlie blushed, both from the passion running through her, and from the thoughts Joey's question created. "No, are you?"

"No, but maybe we could become?" Joey smiled as she kissed her again. Charlie giggled, "come on let's do it!" She rose and grabbed Joey's hand.

* * *

"Where have you been? I didn't see you leave." Ruby asked. She regretted immediately the question as she looked at them, red cheeks, giggling. "You didn't… Oh my God, I'm so embarrassed…" She sank into her seat, trying to disappear. This was one of those "too much information" moments.

Charlie and Joey didn't answer, the look on their face was answer enough. They settled in their seats, heads closely together, still giggling. "I have to say, I like being a member of the "mile high" maybe we should become advanced members?" Charlie whispered, looking into Joey's goldenbrown eyes, still with a smile plastered on her lips. "I think we have to wait till Ruby is sleeping, or she will jump out of the plane!" Joey giggled. "But if it was up to me, I do it again right now!" She kissed her, letting her hand rest on her thigh.

"Seriously, you two." Get a room!" Ruby half whispered through her teeth,"there are people here!"


	15. Chapter 15

**Thank you again for all the great reviews, I'm glad you all still like this. I have to give a huge mush alert again, but I guess you are getting used to my style, so I hope you'll enjoy!**

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"So, how are you doing, in all of this I mean?" Leah looked at Ruby. Ruby glanced over at Charlie and Joey, they had fallen asleep in each other's arms. She sighed, "Honestly, it's been hell. I love Joey, and have to witness what she goes through… it's so hard. I feel so helpless, I don't know what to do." Tears started to run down her cheeks. "Oh, honey!" Leah pulled her in for a hug.

"It's been four months since the assault. I hear her cry at night. She has nightmares, I think Charlie has too. They wake me up at night because they scream. There's nothing I can do, It's so hard… And I have to go to school also. It's so difficult to concentrate on the work, I'm so tired sometimes…my grades are really suffering, if I can't get them up, I'm afraid I have to repeat…"Ruby looked over to her sister again.

Leah felt for Ruby, it wasn't difficult to see that she was telling the truth, it was hard on her. Ruby took a deep breath:"But at least they have each other, I'm so happy for them. They just belong together. I think it's worth it, even if it hurts now… it won't hurt for ever!" she smiled, "And Xavier has been great through this, he's really supportive of me!" She looked sheepishly at Leah, "I wish he could come too, I miss him." "What about you?" Ruby asked

"Oh, I miss Xavier too!" Leah chuckled. "No, seriously, it's been difficult to watch the two of them battle this. I love them both, and I wish I somehow could make it all vanish." She looked past Ruby and let her eyes rest on the couple. "I can't, and this is something they have to get trough, you know, all we can do is to be there for them, support them and comfort them. I hope this is the end of it though, they have had enough heartache."

Leah sighed,"I'm really grateful that I could come along on this trip. I've been there every step of the way, and I hope this can be a new beginning for them." She let her eyes dwell on the sleeping couple." You know, they are just meant for each other, I felt that from the very beginning."

"yeah, I totally agree. I can see it, they are happy together. Not goofy, shallow happy, but truly happy. It's like they complete each other. After all they have been through, they disserve to be together, I hope they stay together for ever!" Ruby joined Leah watching them.

"You know, Joey has become like a sister to me." Ruby took her eyes away from them."In the beginning, I was so angry with Joey. Before I saw them kissing in the car, we used to hang out, she was really cool and fun. I really liked her. Then I caught them kissing… I was so angry and scared, scared that she would steal Charlie away from me… She didn't, instead, she made room for me too in her heart… I love her like a sister. Not exactly like I love Charlie, but… do you know what I mean?" Ruby couldn't find the words to explain how she felt.

"I get it," Leah smiled at her. "You love her like a sister, but Charlie is blood, and that makes it special. The love you have for Charlie is a kind of love that's only for her." Ruby smiled, that was exactly how she felt.

* * *

"Hey sleeping beauty!" Joey kissed the top of the head leaning on her shoulder as she felt her move. "Mmmm… I'm still asleep!" She mumbled cuddling into Joey's side. Joey giggled, put a hand under her chin, lifting it just enough to grant access to give her a kiss. "It'll take more than just a little peck to wake me!" Charlie teased.

Joey laughed and gave her a long, soft kiss, playing with her lower lip. "Yeah, better!" She smiled, nuzzled into her side again, found her hand and began caressing it. They sat in silence, enjoying being close and safe. Charlie glanced over at her sister. She and Leah were sleeping. She smiled, it was good having them here.

They sat for a long time, without saying a word, just wrapped up in the moment with each other. "Joey, there's something I have to talk to you about." Charlie broke the silent.

"Sure, what? Is something wrong?" Joey felt a little anxious, she didn't recognize the tone in Charlie's voice.

Charlie sat up, turned sideways in her seat to face Joey. "Do you remember what you told me on the "Blaxland" after Hugo and Martha's wedding?" She grabbed a hold of both Joey's hands. "How can I ever forget!" Joey lifted her hand, kissed the ring on her finger, "That was our day!"

Charlie smiled, "It was, but out on the boat, you told me that you wanted my name."

"I did, I wanted a family name that was real family. Collins isn't a family name, I have no family. Brett is my brother, but he disowned me…" She leaned her head against Charlie as she spoke. "You and Ruby is my family, I wanted to belong, have the same name, reminding me that I have the best family anyone can have."

Charlie cupped her hands around her head, lifting it up, finding her eyes. She studied them intently. Goldenbrown eyes stared back into hers, filled with love. She gave her a little kiss. "Do you still want it?"

"What do you mean?" Joey didn't quite see where she was coming from.

"I'm asking you if you want to be Mrs. Charlie Buckton." She couldn't hide the smile playing in her face.

"What..? How..? "Joey stuttered, her head had gone completely blank.

"Do you want to marry me, for real this time?" Her smile reached from ear to ear.

"Oh God, yes, can we? How?" Joey interrupted herself by planting kisses where ever she could reach on Charlie. "I do, I want to!" Charlie stopped her frantic kissing by taking a firm hold around her head, holding her still, she kissed her, conveying all her love into it.

"I want us to belong together, legally. I want to share my name with you. I want to share the rest of my life with you, I love you!" Charlie whispered against her lips.

"I want that too. I want to belong to you. I want you to belong to me. I love you!" Joey kissed her again, tears running down her cheeks. "Oh, honey, don't cry!" Charlie let her thumbs stroke the tears away. "I can't help it, I'm so happy! What did I do to deserve you?" Joey sniffed and giggled. Charlie kissed her again, this time with tears in her eyes. "I'm the lucky one!"

"How can we get married though?" Joey asked, not knowing what Charlie had done to fix that. "Well, that's why we're going to Norway. I mean, there are plenty of other places we could have gone to, but then we wouldn't have a wonderful sea voyage to look forward to. So I thought we should get to flies in one whack!"She grabbed her handbag, shuffled around in it before her hand emerged with some papers. "I organized the paperwork with the Australian embassy, it's all ready to be signed. We have an appointment with the captain of the ship… I thought you would like getting married at sea!" Charlie enjoyed watching Joey's reaction as she spoke.

"You have organized all this?" Charlie nodded.

"We're getting married on a ship?" Charlie nodded again, grinning.

"You're kidding me!" Joey couldn't believe what Charlie was telling her.

"Here, have a look!" Charlie reached her the papers. Joey looked down

_Wedding license… Charlie Buckton… Joey Collins…_

"Oh my God, you're not kidding!" Charlie shook her head, "No, I'm not kidding!" Joey started to shower kisses all over her face. She laughed, catching her lips as they past hers. Joey stopped and dwelled with her, the kiss evolved into a deep and passionate one. Joey put her arms around her waist, pulling her closer. Charlie let her hands entwine in her hair, giving into the kiss.

"Hey, you two, remember there's people here, get a room!" They were torn apart by Ruby's voice. They leaned their forehead together. "Shall we tell them?" Charlie smiled. Joey nodded. "You tell!"

Charlie turned in her seat to face Ruby and Leah, they were both awake now. Joey put her hands around her waist, resting her chin on her shoulder.

"Guys we have something to tell you…" Charlie paused, glanced at Joey before she continued. "There's a reason why I invited the two of you to come with us." Charlie reached for Ruby's hand, who took it in a firm grip. "You are our best friends, both of you have supported us from the beginning. You have been there for me, for us, through some pretty rough stuff. You have been there in good times and in bad." A tear threatened to escape.

"I love you girls, you know that!" Leah dried her eyes too.

"Well" Charlie continued, "I have asked Joey to marry me, for real this time." She turned her head smiling at Joey, "and she said yes!"

"Are you serious? How?" Ruby tried to keep her composure. Charlie explained and reached her the papers. She glanced at it quickly, passing them on to Leah. "You're really doing this?" They both nodded trying to keep a serious face.

Ruby looked from one to the other as a huge smile spread across her face. She jumped up from her seat, "Hey, people! My sister is getting married!"She shouted from the top of her lungs.

The announcement was met with applause as Charlie grabbed her and pulled her down.

Ruby placed herself on her lap, leaning against the side of the plane, stretching her legs across Joey's."I'm so happy for you sis," She gave her sister a long hug. "We'll be a family, you'll be my sister in law!" She leaned over, put her arms around Joey's neck and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "Oh, this is wonderful! You have some bright ideas sometimes Charlz!" She giggled.

"Girl's this is fantastic! Thank you for letting me be a part of this!" Leah dried off some tears. She was incredibly happy for them.

"You know, we need witnesses, so I hoped you two would be maids of honor?" Charlie smiled at them.

"Of course!" They answered simultaneously.

Joey couldn't stop smiling, she was overwhelmed by what Charlie had done. They were going to get married, her heart sang, she was so happy. She looked over at Leah, sitting in her seat, blowing her nose, giggling and drying off tears at the same time. Joey knew what she wanted to do.

"Leah, I hope that you would do me the honor of being mine?" Joey asked, "I would be so honored if you would. You have been here for me since the day Charlie brought me home after Brett kicking me out. You opened your home to me, you made me feel at home, you gave me a home. I know there's only ten years between us, but you are the closest I get to having a mother."

Leah rose from her seat and knelt in the aisle, putting her arms around Joey and held her close. "Of course I'll be your maid of honor!" She loosened her hold and let her hands run over her hair instead, looking into her eyes. "You are like a daughter to me! Something about you triggered the motherly instinct in me. I've learned to know you, learned to love you. I have seen you go through horrible things. I have hurt for you, worried about you. I have seen you grow into the incredible beautiful woman you are today. I love to be a part of your happiest day!" She gave her a kiss on her cheek.

"Excuse me" The voice of the flight attendant interrupted them. "I heard this young lady shouting something about someone getting married?"

"Yes!" Ruby answered before anyone else had a chance to, "My sister, "she patted Charlie on the head, "Is getting married!"

"And the groom?" The attendant asked, lifting one of his eyebrows. Charlie blushed, "There is no groom…" She grabbed a hold of Joey's hand, "but there is a bride!" She smiled up at him.

A smile broke out on the attendants face, "I kind of thought so, seeing the two of you, I just wanted to be sure I didn't make wrong assumptions."

He disappeared for a second before he returned with a bottle of champagne. "May I offer you a glass on the "house", to celebrate the happy occasion? I'm thrilled to see two people tying the knot. I'm so happy for you, and I wish you all the best for your life together!" He smiled, poured them three glasses and saluted them.


	16. Chapter 16

**Thank you again for the reviews, more mush on its way, Enjoy!**

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"Wow! This is going to be the best vacation ever!" Joey smiled from ear to ear. She threw her arms around Charlie, kissing every part of her face se could get her lips on. "I love you, how did you find this?"

Charlie smiled, and placed her arms around her shoulders, "Well, I searched the web for the most beautiful sea voyage in the world to match the most beautiful girl in the world!" She grinned, kissing her back.

"Hey guys, is this the boat we're going on?" Leah caught up to them together with Ruby. "And seriously, is this summer? I have to say I'm sorry for the people living here!" Ruby pulled her jacket tighter.

They were standing on a pier, in front of them was a huge, red, black and white ship. "Oh, this is gonna be so cool!" Joey exclaimed. "Well, I'll probably freeze to death before I can enjoy any of this trip," Ruby wasn't as trilled. "Oh, come on sis, it'll be fun! Just give it a chance!" Charlie playfully nudge her in the side.

They boarded the ship, the reception area was delicately decorated. Blue carpet, woven to give an illusion of the sea, white walls, decorated with paintings of old ships that had been in service for the coastal express. Some of the sealing was open to give a view up all five stories. There were wooden details everywhere.

They were friendly received and shown to their cabins. Leah and Ruby sharing one, and they an other. Joey was the first to enter. She was stunned by the look of the place. "Oh, Charlie, we even have a balcony!" She opened the double doors. It wasn't big, just enough space for two chairs and a small table. "Oh, it's cold!" she shut the doors and giggled. "I think I need to warm up!" She pulled Charlie close and started kissing her.

Charlie didn't have to be asked twice, she let her hands find the way under Joey's jacket. "Well, isn't it strange that your idea of getting warm involves removing the clothes that keep you warm?" Charlie teased.

"Oh, I have something far better than clothes to get me warm!" Joey teased back as she let her hands find their way around Charlie, pulling her shirt up from her pants, replacing it with her hands. "I have my own private heater!" She giggled, let her lips find Charlie's again. She pulled of her jacket and started to unbutton her shirt. Her lips showered kisses all over the skin she exposed, creating goosebumps in their path.

Charlie wasn't slow to return the favor. She pulled Joey's sweater over her head, and let her hands run over her body, coming to a rest on top of her bra. Joey opened Charlie's, letting lips dwell on the parts of Charlie's body she had just exposed.

"I think we should check if the bed is comfortable, you know, just to be sure," Charlie gave Joey a little push, causing her to fall on her back on it. She followed her, sitting on top of her with one leg on either side. "You are so beautiful, I can't get enough of you!" She stared into goldenbrown eyes filled with love. She unbuttoned Joey's pants and pulled down the zipper before she stretched out on top of her.

Joey let her hands wander down to her butt, sneaking her hands under the lining of her pants, finding soft, warm skin. "Charlie, you're so good to me, I love you, and I want you!" Their lips found each other again, tongues playing, seeking deep as to mimic what other parts of their bodies was doing.

Charlie lay on top of Joey, resting her head on her neck as their breathing slowly returned to normal. "Well, I think the bed serves it purpose!" Joey giggled, cupping one of her legs over Charlie. "This feels so good, don't ever get off!"

Charlie propped herself up on her elbows, being almost nose to nose with Joey, she closed the tiny gap and kissed her on the tip of it. "I think maybe Ruby and Leah are going to miss us soon, but I don't want to get off either. I love feeling you under me. You're so warm and soft, and I like your legs around me!" She finished with a kiss on her lips.

Finally untangling from each other, they got dressed and went to find Ruby and Leah. They had settled in the cabin next door. "You know, Charlz, maybe this won't be so bad after all!" Ruby launched herself onto one of the beds. "At least the beds are real comfy, have you checked it out yet?"

Both Charlie and Joey blushed, not quite knowing what to say. "OK, guys, I get the picture… seriously, we haven't even left port yet!" Ruby looked at them and shook her head, teasingly.

She went over to the doors to the balcony, "Do you think this is normal weather for this part of the world?" Ruby looked out on the grey, cold weather, clouds hanging low, the wind starting to pick up. "I mean this is July, and it's supposed to be summer here now, but I swear, it's warmer back home, and it's winter there!"

"No, when I checked out the web page, it said that the middle temperature is quite nice, and when we get further north we'll have the midnight sun too, "Charlie explained, "It'll be nice!"

* * *

"OK, this is not my idea of nice!" Ruby looked a little scared. They had left port 6 hours ago, and now they were heading into a stretch of open ocean. The wind that had picked up before they left was from the outskirts of a freak summer storm far north in the Atlantic Ocean. It whipped up some pretty bad waves. "I don't like this, I don't think I have sea legs or sea stomach…" Ruby was slowly turning green."I think I agree with you," Leah was not looking any better. "I don't like this either. I think we go to our cabin and lay down until this is over."

"Do you want us to come with you?" Joey wasn't affected by the weather at all, she looked like she rather enjoyed it. "No, we'll just make you sick too, we're OK, just need to lay down." Ruby took Leah's hand and made their way out from the panorama lounge.

"Oh, poor girls!" Joey giggled, "are you OK?" She looked at Charlie. "I'm don't know, are you sure this is safe?" She gave a little squeal as the bow of the boat disappeared under a wave. Joey giggled, "This is nothing, it's a huge ship and those waves are probably not more than about ten meters high."

Charlie gave her a dirty look. "Hey, come and sit with me, I keep you safe!" Joey took her hand guiding her over to her lap. Charlie sat down, putting her arm around her neck. Joey put her arms around her waist. "Now, this is nice, this gives me an excuse to hold you!" She grinned, placed a kiss on her lips.

"I have to admit, this is not so bad," Charlie smiled at her. She squealed again when another huge wave made the ship shake. Joey held her tighter, laughing. "I love you, I'm so happy that we're here!" Charlie looked at her, "I think you are the only one really enjoying almost being shipwrecked, but I have to say that the idea of stranding on a desert island with you is quite appealing!" She smiled and kissed her.

They sat in silence, enjoying the view through the panorama windows. They went the whole height of the room, providing an uninterrupted 180*view. Charlie would squeal when a particularly huge wave hit, squeezing into Joey, who would just laugh and pull her closer. "I like this, I wish it would last longer than just two hours before we're into calmer water!"

* * *

Charlie was sitting in front of the mirror in her cabin, watching Ruby in it, doing her hair. This was the day. She felt butterflies in her stomach, she was exited, and a little nervous. They had talked with the captain, agreed on having the ceremony when they reached the area of the midnight sun. The captain had suggested to have it at night, exploiting the atmosphere the midnight sun created. It sounded wonderful, and something neither of them had experienced before. Charlie wanted it to be perfect.

The weather was beautiful, after the initial storm, it had shown it's best side. It was warm, clear and beautiful. They had spent the two days before the ceremony enjoying the scenery, staying up on deck, watching eagles flying, seen small villages along the coast, and experienced some of the local cuisine. They all had a fabulous time.

It was two more hours until the ceremony. Joey had disappeared with Leah to get ready, and Ruby was with her. Ruby stopped brushing her hair, placing her arms on her shoulders and caught her eyes in the mirror.

"I just want to tell you that I really love you Charlz." She kissed her cheek. "I'm so happy for you. You know, before Joey I used to wonder if you ever would find someone that disserved you. I mean, you didn't exactly have the best luck with guys." She smiled, kissed her cheek again. "Then Joey came, I'm willing to say that she is good enough for you. I love you, I love her, and I'm so glad that we'll be a proper family!" She had a little tear running down her cheek, she quickly brushed it away.

"Aw, little sis, I love you too! I'm so glad that you are happy for us, you know, you have really showed what a wonderful person you are through it all. You are open minded, warm hearted and intelligent! I guess it runs in the family!" She teased her. "I love you so much Rubs, and I'm so happy that you're my maid of honor, I would never want it to be anyone else!" She put her hand on her cheek, gently stroking her thumb over it. "Love you girl!"

* * *

Joey looked at Leah standing behind her, doing her hair. "I'm nervous, I want this to be perfect." Leah caught her eyes in the mirror. "Don't worry, Joey, it will be, you're going to look fabulous. The dress we picked out is gorgeous,"She smiled reassuring to her. "The only problem you might have is that you make Charlie speechless, and she won't be able to say her vow's." Leah teased her, easing Joey's nerves.

She looked at the dress hanging on the door. She had hijacked Leah in Frankfurt, where they had staid over night, giving them time for some shopping. She had asked Charlie what she would like her to wear, and she had said she would prefer her naked. Charlie teased her and finished with the statement that no matter what she had on, the only thought she would have was to take it off again. With that she had made love to her, teasingly, fun and good. Joey blushed a little when her thought dwelled there for a second. She could never get enough of her.

Leah and she had left Charlie and Ruby and went dress hunting. They had found a dress that made her blush when she tried it on. It was the closest she came to being naked and still wear clothes. It was so tight that it clung to every curve on her body. It was almost impossible to get into it, but well on, it looked as if it had been molded to her body.

"Thanks Leah, for being her for me, for us, you have no idea how much it means to me!" Joey grabbed a hold of Leah's hand, giving it a little squeeze. "My pleasure girl, love you!" Leah replied, putting her other hand on her cheek.

* * *

Joey was standing looking out the window in the door leading to the deck, it looked like the whole ship was present out there. She wasn't aware that the wedding had been publicly announced. Looking at all those people made her nervous. She let her hands run over her dress. "Leah, I didn't know this, what am I going to do?" "don't worry, you're going to do exactly what you have planned, you're going to marry Charlie!" Leah took her hands, trying to settle her nerves.

"They probably don't know that we are both women. Our names, Charlie and Joey, they can both be men's name. what if they throw up a fuzz about us?" Joey was concerned, she didn't want anything to ruin their day.

"If anyone does, they will be told to leave, the staff knows you are both women, they know what they can expect." Leah's calm voice settled her a little. "OK...You sure I look OK?" She started to worry about that too. They had realized when she put the dress on that she couldn't wear anything under it, it was so tight that any lines created by bra or panties didn't look good. It was OK when it was just Charlie, but in front of so many people, she felt like they could see through the fabric.

"You look gorgeous, and the only one that matters is Charlie, the rest of the people here, you're never gonna see them again!" Leah smiled at her.

* * *

The captain approached Charlie. "Are you ready for the ceremony?" He asked with a smile, Charlie bit the inside of her lower lip, she had seen the crowd gathered on deck, it made her nervous. "Oh, don't worry about the crowd, we made the decision to tell that this is a same sex wedding, since your names doesn't revile that. We have made sure that everybody present is OK with that, we won't allow any stupid disturbances. This is all people who want to share this special moment with you." The captain's words erased her nerves. She smiled and nodded to him, "I'm ready!"

"Joey, we are ready for you!" Leah came in to get her. She smiled, gave her a kiss on the cheek before opening the door for her. As she stepped out she felt all eyes on her, but it wasn't a bad feeling. She looked down on the deck to see where she walked. She felt a pair of eyes looking at her, she didn't have to guess who it was, it was Charlie. As she lifted her head, her eyes saw a revelation in front of her.

Her jaw dropped, Charlie had been beautiful in Hugo and Martha's wedding, but this...She just stared. Charlie was wearing a white, long dress with pearl embroidery. The embroidery emphasized her curves. Narrow straps over the shoulder, leading down to a v-neck, following the shape of her breasts. Her hair was loose, blowing in the wind, the midnight sun made her look like she was made of gold. The warm, soft light made her skin glow. The fabric clung to her torso, hugging her hips, then widened and flowed down to the ground.

Charlie smiled and ran a hand trough her hair, Joey couldn't tear away from the mesmerizing sight. She couldn't believe how perfect Charlie looked, and that this perfection was the woman she was about to marry.

Charlie was on deck when the other door opened. She felt the gentle wind blow through her hair, it felt like a heavenly endearment. She choked when Joey appeared, she was amazed over the beauty that came towards her. She was wearing a strapless dress. It was short, white with golden treads woven into it. The gold made the dress glow in the light from the midnight sun. It shimmered as she walked. It looked like it had been painted on, revealing every curve and shape of her body. It ended on the middle of her thigh, showing of the perfect curve of the muscles in her thighs, meeting and following the curve of her hipbones.

The dress had loose arms, they too looked like they were painted on. All of the dress emphasized her toned body. Charlie smiled at her, ran a hand through her hair. She tried to keep her composure, but being drawn to Joey as if she had a gravity field, didn't help. The closer she came, more of her beauty was reviled.

Joey felt like she was the moon and Charlie the earth. The pull from her drew her out of her immobile state, drawing her closer until she stood face to face with the woman she loved.

Charlie smiled at her. "Are you going commando?" She whispered, letting her eyes wander down her body. "Well, you said you wanted me naked!" Joey lifted one of her eyebrows and smiled cheeky to her. Charlie had to use all her willpower not to kiss her there and then. "Don't worry about the people, the captain has explained about us, they're all OK with it, they just want to share our moment." Charlie stared at Joey's lips. Joey couldn't resist, she gave her a kiss.

"Hey you two, it's time for that later, let's get this ceremony going!" Ruby figured it was time to break them apart, otherwise they would never be able to focus on anything but each other.

Charlie took a deep breath, smiled and turned to Ruby, "you're right, let's get this going!" She turned and faced Joey, offering her arm. Hand in hand, they walked up to the captain.

Facing each other, Joey found it hard to focus on anything but the deep blue eyes she was staring into. They were full of love, joy, and wondering. She felt the same herself. Love deeper than the ocean for the woman in front of her. Joy of belonging to her, wondering why she was so lucky to have the most wonderful person in the world marrying her.

The voice of the captain jolted her back; "Do you, Joey Collins, take Charlie Buckton, standing here, to be your lawfully wedded wife?" Joey stared into the blue eyes, "I do!" "To have and to hold, for better and for worse, for richer or poorer, from this day on, so help you God?" The captain continued. "I do!" Her eyes glittering.

"Do you, Charlie Buckton take Joey Collins, standing here, to be your lawfully wedded wife?" Charlie drowned in the goldenbrown eyes staring into hers, "I do!" "To have and to hold, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, so help you God?"

"I do!"

"Now, you have something you want to say "The captain took a step back, leaving them to each other.

Joey squeezed Charlie's hands. "Charlie… I don't have words to describe how much I love you, but I will spend every day of the rest of my life to show you. I will broaden my vocabulary to find new words in order to tell you. You are my everything, the air I breath. Your love makes me soar like the eagles. You lay me down, you lift me up. If my life up to the point I met you was the price I had to pay to be here, with you today, I'll gladly pay it again. I love you, Charlie Buckton, always, forever! I'm yours, I will always be!" Tears were glittering in her eyes as she finished.

Charlie had trouble speaking, Joeys words had given her a lump in her throat that wouldn't allow her to get any sounds pass it. She looked into her eyes, swallowing, trying to clear it.

"Joey" she croaked. Clearing her throat she tried again. "Joey, the first time I saw you, you struck a chord in me. I didn't even knew. You captivated me, intrigued me. I wanted to know you. I fell in love with you, never to rise again. I gave you my heart, and you treated it with such love and compassion. From the moment I saw you, I didn't want anyone else. You fulfill every need that I have. I love you more than I knew possible. I give you everything. You are my daylight, my morning glory, you're my dusk and my dawn. I promise you , it's you I've been searching for, you are the one I need, you threw me a lifeline, a new beginning. I love you, I always will, I love you!" She finished, put her hands on Joey's cheeks and kissed her.

Joey felt tears running down her cheeks as Charlie spoke. Her body full of love for her. When Charlie kissed her, she put her arms around her waist, pulling her as close as she could.

The captain interrupted them, "Just a second girls!" He smiled, "By the power invested in me, I here by declare you wife and wife! Now, you may kiss your bride!"

They didn't have to be asked twice. They found each other's lips, put all their feelings into it. Laughing and crying at the same time. They broke apart to catch their breath. Applause and cheering reached their ears, they turned to face the crowd, found themselves in the arms of Ruby and Leah, they had tears running down their face too. "Oh God, that was so beautiful. I love you!" Was the only thing they managed to convey of their experience of the ceremony.


	17. Chapter 17

**If anybody is confused, I posted this chapter yesterday, had a feedback on it, and decided to rewrite it slightly. Now I repost it, so those who subscribe has got two mails for the same chapter, sorry for that, but hope you enjoy the chapter:)**** Thank you for all the great reviews by the way!**

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"Good morning Mrs. Buckton!" Joey leaned over the sleeping woman lying in bed. "I got something for you," She kissed her carefully, waking her , her lips were met with a smile. "Good morning to you too, Mrs. Buckton!" Charlie put a hand behind her neck, returning the kiss. "I got everything I want!" She continued, smiling even broader.

Joey couldn't resist, she lay down on top of her, supporting herself on her elbows. Her hands entwined in Charlie's hair, she attacked the soft skin on her neck, letting her mouth play with her. "You taste so good, I never get tired of you." She continued caressing her neck with her lips and tongue. She let her lips continue down, meeting the curves she loved so much. She let her tongue play. "You're so beautiful, I could do this forever!" She stopped talking, focusing entirely on what she was doing.

Soft sounds of pleasure escaped from Charlie, she put one of her legs around Joey. She pulled of her top, wanting to feel her bare skin on her own. "I want you, always!" She whispered in her ear. Joey let her hand find its way between them, seeking down. Her fingers met a warm, soft place, she let her hand move to the beat of an inner rhythm. "I want to be inside of you, feel all of you." She kissed her, tongue playing to the same inner beat.

* * *

"I like your something!" Charlie kissed her after the breathing returned to normal. "Me to, "She kissed her back, "but that wasn't it." She rolled of, laying beside her, with Charlie's arm under her head. "Look what came this morning!"

Joey pulled up a square book. "It's our wedding pictures, they came just now in the mail!" She opened it. The first picture was of them kissing. "Wow, I'm impressed!" Charlie was taken by the beauty. "It's kind of strange that's us, I mean we look like models!"

Joey giggled, turned her head and kissed her, "especially you! But you always look like one… no that's not true, I have never seen a model as beautiful as you!" She kissed her again.

It was three months ago, Joey let her thoughts wander back. It had been a beautiful ceremony, the light had been magic, the midnight sun created an enchanted atmosphere. A lot of people had been there, it was nice to receive all the congratulations afterwards. So many people were happy for them.

Even having the ceremony so late at night, they had dinner at the Captains table afterwards, before dancing into the early hours. It had been wonderful. They had the first dance alone, it was a little strange, with all those people watching, but in each other's arms they had soon forgotten.

She flipped the page. "Oh Joey, look at that!" Charlie was blown away. It was a picture of Joey, she had been allowed onto the bow of the ship, and the photographer had taken a "Titanic shot." "You look like a million dollars, this is mine!" She said laughing, pulling it out of the book, pressing it to her heart. "So, you rather have a picture than the real me?" Joey teased her. Leaned in and kissed her again.

It was a lot of beautiful pictures, the setting had been fantastic, the nature surrounding them had been breath taking, not that they saw any of it that day, they were to occupied with each other. But the steep mountains that rose from the ocean, some still with a snowcap on, created the perfect backdrop. The pictures were absolutely gorgeous.

Charlie looked down on the woman resting on her arm. She was really happy. The vacation had been a new beginning. Robbo and the trail had become a closed chapter. Finally, it seemed the end of all hardship.

Joey rose from her arm, rolled over on her side, placing a leg over hers. "Charlie, I've been thinking about one thing."Charlie looked at her, seeing a little smile playing in the corner of her mouth. "You know, we have talked about it before, we know what we want, I think we should." Joey looked at her. Charlie pulled her head back a little, feeling a little insecure. "What should we?" She asked.

"You know, kids, I think it's time." Charlie smiled "I'll make babies with you right now!" She gave her a kiss. "Charlie, I'm trying to be serious here!" Joey tried to pretend to be annoyed. "I am serious, I want to make babies with you!" she smiled against her lips, kissing her again.

"Unfortunately I have to go to work, I don't think we have time!" Charlie giggled, she was teasing, but she meant what she said. She pulled on a serious face, "Seriously Joey, you now I want kids, and I know you want kids. I think we should make our own family. Besides, I think you would look absolutely gorgeous pregnant!" She smiled again, giving her a kiss.

"Well I want to see you pregnant, but it's not like I can do that to you, even though I wish." Joey let her mind picture a pregnant Charlie, yeah, she would look good! "Hey, come back to me, we haven't finished our conversation!" Charlie kissed heragain to get her attention. "I know I can't get you pregnant, but I would love a little Joey running around here!" "Well, I want a little Charlie, a little, perfect copy of you!" She placed her hand on Charlie's cheek.

Joey looked into her eyes. She thought about all the times they had talked about this, dreaming of having their own little family, a goofy smile spread across her face.

"Hey, where are you going?" Charlie shook her shoulder. "Oh, I just thought about little Charlies and Joeys running around here!" She smiled at her. Charlie let her mind wander, a pregnant Joey would look so good. "You make a great mum! You have such a good hand with kids. Look at VJ, he worships the ground you walk on, and Rachel and Tony's little boy, he is practically glued to you when you're there! I think we should look into our options, you know, find out how we can make our dream come true."

Charlie couldn't help but teas her again, "I promise you I'll hold your hair when you throw up in the morning. That's the least I can do, when you suffer through morning sickness for me!" She giggled, and placed a kiss on Joey's lips.

"I could have a chat to Rachel about it, she would know what to do. I don't have anyone to take out on the "Blaxland" so it would be nice, you know, to see if she would support us and help us." Joey placed a kiss on her lips.

"Yeah, that would be good… Oh, I have to get to work, I'm running late!" With that Charlie dragged herself out of bed, duty calling.

Joey went over to Rachel's place. Having a doctor as a friend had its benefits. If she was on their side, it would be so much easier. It was still early, but she knew that she would be up with her toddler, if she wasn't at work. She took a chance on her being home.

"Hi, come in!" Rachel called, Joey entered. "Hi, you're just in time for breakfast, you want to join me? Tony is out with Xavier and Hugo, and he took our little tornado with him." Joey accepted the offer, it couldn't be more perfect.

"So how are the newlyweds doing, I don't know if I can call you that any longer, haven't it been about three months now?" Joey smiled and nodded. "It has, and we're happy as can be. I think we finally have closed the book on Robbo and all that stuff, I feel really free." Joey said, knowing that Rachel knew every little detail about her.

"That's so good to hear, but you know, it might come days when you fall back, this is hard to get over, and it will always be with you, but it won't control your life any longer." Rachel squeezed her hand and smiled at her. "And you'll always have Charlie, ready to pull you up if you should stumble a little sometimes!"

Joey smiled back at her, she knew she was right, but she wasn't scared. She felt that the power Robbo used to have over her was gone. She would still have the memories, but they didn't control her. Her smile broadened, and Charlie was always going to be there.

"Anyway, did you have a special reason to come over, or is it just a social call?" Rachel asked her as she gave her a cup of coffee before she sat down.

Joey blushed, "Well, I do have a reason, maybe we should have come when you're at work, but I hate hospitals." Rachel nodded, she knew that. "You see, Charlie and I talked this morning, well actually we have talked about it since we got together, and we would like to do something about it." Joey paused, she wasn't sure how Rachel would react, she supported them, but she knew a lot of people was against gay couples having kids. Well there was nothing to it, she had to bring it up.

"You see, we want kids," Joey looked at Rachel to see her reaction. A broad smile was spreading across her face, "That's so wonderful, you'll be great parents!" Rachel gave her a hug, "So you want my help to make it happen?" Joey nodded, happy that Rachel reacted so well. Having her on their side would make it so much easier.

"So do you want to adopt or do you want to give birth to one?"

"Well we want to have our own kids, actually we want two, one now, and one later."

"OK, if you can get one, you can get two, but you obviously need a donor. Do you have a private one?"

"No, we don't want anybody we know, it would make it so complicated…"

"OK, we have sperm baks, but I'm not sure. You know if we were in Scandinavia, it wouldn't be any problem, but here…" She paused, "but I will do my very best to help you, I can make some calls, and see what I can find out."

"Rachel that would be great, you're so helpful, thank you so much!" Joey gave her a hug.

"OK, l see what I can do, and I think we should set you both up for an appointment to talk through your options. I give you a call when I now more."

Joey was trilled, She finished her coffee talking to Rachel about the experience of being pregnant. It felt good to have a doctor who also were her friend. "Rachel, thank you for everything, It's so good to have you!" Joey gave her a hug again before she left.

As soon as she left Rachel she pulled out her phone to call Charlie, she had to tell her that Rachel would help them. Her call went to voicemail, she didn't want to tell her like that, so she just left a message telling her to call as soon as she could.

Joey was so happy, she was lost in her dreams of little Charlies and Joeys running around, she bumped straight into Aden. "Wow, that's a happy face, if I haven't seen one before!" He teased, "What's the happy occasion?"

"Oh, Aden, you wanna come over, have a cup of coffee!" Joey laughed, She was happy, and having some company would be great, it was a long time since she had a chance to catch up with Aden.

* * *

"Wow, that's really great, I demand to be uncle! I hope Rachel can work it out for you" Aden was happy for them. "Kids! You're going to be a great mum, Charlie too, any kid would be lucky to have you as parents" He smiled.

They sat on the porch, taking kids, boats and girlfriends. Aden told that thing wasn't going good with Nicole, they had actually broken up. "Are you sorry for that?" Joey was concerned for him, "Naa, not really, it hasn't been great for a longtime, I think we just grew apart, "He answered.

They kept the conversation going, talking about everything and nothing, just enjoying hanging out.

A police car came up to the house as Aden was about to leave, "Hey, it must be Charlie!" Joey exclaimed, she ran down the stairs. She froze as Watson, senior constable Watson, stepped out of the car. Joey felt Aden come up behind her.

Watson wrung her hands, and came slowly towards her. Joey felt ice cold hands grabbing her heart. "Where's Charlie?" She could hardly speak, her whole body was filled with the feeling that something was terribly wrong. Aden grabbed a hold of her arm.

"I'm sorry Joey, "Watson paused, hating to be the messenger giving the news, "Charlie has been shot."


	18. Chapter 18

Joey was sitting on a chair in the hospital reception area, waiting to hear news. When Watson had told her, she felt like she died. She couldn't breath, couldn't think. Her whole body was ice-cold. She couldn't get out a word.

Aden had grabbed a hold of her, he had asked for her, his voice shaking. "Is she OK?" Watson didn't answer, Joey felt her knee give away, she fell to the ground.

"I… I don't know, she is in hospital…" Watson knelt down beside Joey, "I take you there!" She grabbed a hold of Joeys elbow, pulling her to her feet. "What happened?" Aden asked, Joey looked from him to Watson.

"There was a shootout in Yabbie Creek, someone was robbing a store, we didn't know they had guns… Charlie got hit… twice." Tears was forming in Watsons eyes. She had been partnering with Charlie for years, they were friends, she was scared too.

"Oh God…" Joey felt the cold get even colder, her body was stiff. "Oh God, we have to get Ruby…I don't know where she is, the school is finished, she could be anywhere."

"I go and look for her," Aden offered, "you need to go to the hospital."

* * *

"Joey, Joey!" A voice shouted for her, she rose her head, Ruby was running towards her, she caught her in her arms. "Oh God, is it true, Have you heard anything?" Tears were streaming down her face, her body shaking. She was so afraid.

Joey shook her head, no one has said anything after the initial briefing from one of the nurses. Aden came up behind Ruby, he placed a hand on her shoulder, "Come, sit down, and let Joey tell what she knows."

"I have only spoken to a nurse, she is in theater, she was shot… twice…" Tears streaming down her face, she couldn't hide her anxiety from Ruby. Ruby heaved for air. "She was hit in the gut and the head…" Joey could hardly speak, "The shot to the head is apparently just a close shave, but the other… I don't know…" Ruby leaned into her and sobbed.

* * *

"Rachel if, you get to the head wound, I take care of her stomach, we need to do both at the same time." The surgeon looked at her over the face mask. She nodded, went around the table. The beeping of the heart monitor and the puffing from the respirator threw her for a second. This was so unreal. She shook her head to clear her mind, she had to focus.

She looked down on Charlie's face, her eyes taped shut, the respirator tube in her mouth, she felt tears rice. She took a deep breath, she had to concentrate. She took sponges to clean away blood from the side of her head. The scans had shown that there were no damage to the brain, put just the pressure from a gunshot could create swelling.

She cut away the hair around the edges of the wound, trying to take as little as possible. It was long, running from behind her ear to the temple. She could see that the bullet had scratched her skull, she was worried, this was no small injury. She cleaned it out thoroughly, and stitched it up, careful to make it as clean as possible so the scaring would be minimized.

"Damn!" The surgeon's voice called for her attention. "This is bad… I need your help!" "Yeah, I'm finished here," Leaving the final clean up and dressing to a nurse. As she shifted position one of the nurses dragged her attention to the heart monitor, "Her BP is dropping… heart rate is going down…" Rachel heard the beeping of the monitor slow down until it gave one long beep, and the green line stopped peaking.

* * *

"I can't take this anymore!" Ruby jumped up, started to pace franticly, "Why doesn't anyone tell us anything! They must know something by now, it's been hours. And why the hell hasn't Xavier come. Don't he know that I need him here!" She was angry and she was scared. Charlie was her only sister, they were incredible close. They had leaned on each other for years.

She stopped in her steps, looking at Joey, "What if she … what if she doesn't…" Tears streamed down her face again, she couldn't bear the thought of losing her. Joey jumped up, held her tight, "Ssjj, she will make it, she is strong, she is fit, she'll fight!" She tried to comfort her, but she didn't believe her own words. It had taken so long time, it had to be bad.

"Hey, you two,"Aden joined them, putting his arms around both of them, "You have to be strong, she will need you when she get out of there! She will make it!" He guided them on to the chough. They sat down with Ruby in the middle, both of them putting their arms around her. She cried, leaning her head against Aden. He looked at Joey over her head, they both had the same fear in their eyes.

* * *

Rachel pulled of her scrubs, they were covered in blood, she leaned against the closet, finding some new she could put on before talking to Joey and Ruby. She was tired, the surgery had taken hours, every time they thought they had stopped the bleeding, something new would show up. She sighed, she had to talk to them. The other surgeon had offered to, but she wanted to, she was their friend, and even though it was difficult, it was better that she did it.

She walked slowly towards the double doors leading into the reception area, through the windows she could see Joey sitting biting her nails and Ruby sleeping with her head on Aden's chest. She took a deep breath and went in.

Joey saw Rachel coming in, she jumped up nudging Ruby. All three got to their feet. Joey looked into Rachel's face, trying to see what was going on.

"She is out of surgery…" Rachel saw a glimmer of relief on their faces. "She has a head wound, not too bad, we fixed that."She continued."She might get some swelling, but we don't expect it to be bad…" She looked at them. "What?" Aden asked, he could see that it wasn't all good news she was bringing.

"Well, the shot to her stomach, it was bad, it hit some vital organs. We had a hard time stopping the bleeding… she arrested on the table… twice… we got her back, we managed to stop everything… but she is not waking up."

Ruby collapsed in Aden's arms, sobbing. Joey felt ice-cold hands grabbing her heart, squeeze all life out of her. "Can… can we see her?" She whispered.

Rachel nodded and showed them the way to the ICU.

Joey walked through the doors, closely followed by Ruby and Aden. She teared up again at the sight of Charlie in the hospital bed. She was surrounded by large machines, she didn't know what they all did, but she recognized the heart monitor. She looked at the line making little peaks, it showed that her heart kept beating. She couldn't take her eyes of it, it showed her that she was still alive.

Her eyes wandered to Charlie, tears pouring down her face now. She looked so small and fragile. Her head was covered by a bandaid, she could see a bruise forming down the side of her cheek. The tube in her mouth, breathing for her. A bag of blood and one with something clear was connected to her arm. She didn't move. Joey wanted her to open her eyes and tell her she loved her, that everything would be OK, but she didn't.

She heard Ruby sob, she was scared by the sight of her sister. Rachel went over to comfort her, with her soft soothing voice she told her that her sister was strong, she would fight.

Joey shifted her attention back to Charlie, she took her hand in hers. It felt heavy, no life in it, but it was warm. "Charlie, honey" She cried, tears running, dropping from her face, hitting the skin of Charlie's arm. "You have to come back to me, I can't live without you, we can't afford to lose you. Please come back!" She sobbed.

She felt arms around her, she turned and faced Ruby, they grabbed a hold of each other, sobbing in each other's arm. They shared love and fear for the woman in the bed.

"Girls I leave you to it, we have to tell Leah before she hears from someone else, and we should tell Hugo and Martha too, I take the trip and tell them." Aden offered, he was worried too, but he was the most capable of the three to tell the rest of the people who needed to know. Joey gave him a hug, "Thank you, I can't, we can't leave now!"

* * *

Aden dreaded to have to tell Leah and the rest. He was worried, and he didn't know what to say, Should he say that she was going to be OK, or that it didn't look good? He had no way of knowing, but he didn't' want them to hear gossip about it. He stopped the car outside Leah's house, sitting in the car for a moment before he made his way up to the house.

Leah was doing the dishes as he walked up to the door, giving it a gentle knock. "Aden! Good to see you, what's up?" She smiled at him, then she noticed his face, her smile faded, "What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry, Leah, It's Charlie… she has been shot." Aden found it hard to utter the words as he watched Leah's face change from a broad smile to shock.

"Is she… is she OK?"

"I don't know, "he answered truthfully. "She arrested on the table, but she's out of surgery now, but she doesn't wake up…"

"Oh. My God, let's go, I have to be there." Leah scrambled for her purse and keys. "I take you, but I have to tell Hugo and Martha too." Aden offered. "No, I drive, it's OK, I meet you there," She was out the door before she had finished talking.

* * *

Leah grabbed a hold of Rachel standing at the reception desk. "What happened, how is she doing?" Leah looked her in the eyes. "She was shot, "Rachel explained everything. "Is she going to be OK?" the worried crease between her eyebrows was deep. "Honestly, we just have to wait and see, we have done everything we can, it's up to her now." Rachel sighed. "I hope she will be."

Leah entered the ICU, a lump formed in her throat at the sight that met her. Charlie immobile in the bed, tubes and machines everywhere. Ruby on Joey's lap, head buried in her neck, Joey eyes locked on the woman in the bed.

"Hi, girls, how...?" She said gently, both raised their heads, "Oh, it's good to see you here!" Joey rose from her place, leaving it to Ruby. She walked over to Leah, threw her arms around her and sobbed. It was good to have her there, have someone to lean on.

* * *

Joey was tired, people had been in all afternoon, it was late at night now, she wasn't sure what time it was. Ruby was sleeping in a chair, refusing to leave. She let her stay, she understood very well the need to be there.

She leaned over Charlie, stroking her lips over the part of her cheek she could reach. "Charlie, angel, please come back to me. I can't live without you. I love you more than life it self. Fight Charlie, you can do it! You know I talked with Rachel this morning, she wants to help us, we can have kids, make a family… but Charlie, the only thing I want is you. I don't need anything else, just you, come back to me!"


	19. Chapter 19

**Thank you for all the great reviews, I'm delighted that you still like the story!**

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Charlie felt a burning pain on the side of her head. Something warm ran down her ear and neck. Not understanding what it was, she lifted her hand and touched her head. It felt strange, her hand met something warm and sticky. She looked at her hand in amazement, it was covered in blood. As she stood looking at it, not comprehending what had happened, she felt a kick in her gut, she leaned over, gasping for air, clutching her stomach with her hands.

She had never felt such pain before, she dropped to her knees, bending over. She could see Watson running towards her, shouting, it was like she was moving in slow motion. She felt something coming up her throat, she coughed and to her astonishment red fluid poured from her mouth. She looked down, seeing a red stain rapidly covering her shirt.

She looked up again, Watson was just a few steps away, she fell on her knees beside her. She could see her face, her mouth moving, but she couldn't hear a word. She slipped into darkness.

* * *

She was sinking into the ocean. The water was warm and soothing. She tried to touch her head to see what was going on, but she couldn't move. She felt the water covering her, she couldn't breathe, but she wasn't drowning, she felt as if she drew oxygen out of the water. It felt good and relaxing, she surrendered to the water.

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The ocean filled up with a pair of eyes, they where goldenbrown, looking for her. She tried to call out to them, but she couldn't form the words.

She felt that she was sinking deeper and deeper, she couldn't fight it, wouldn't, it felt so good just to sink.

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She felt like she floated up again. She saw faces floating by her, _Joey!_ her heart cried out, before it disappeared. _Ruby..Sis_, she floated by too. She saw her father, her mother, she couldn't catch any ones attention, it was like she wasn't there. aAs she gave into the feeling of floating up, she felt herself sink back down.

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_Charlie, come back to me_! She could hear a familiar voice, but it was so far away. _Joey_, she tried to call out. She tried to move towards the voice, but she was incredible tired, she had never felt such exhaustion before. She gave herself over to the water.

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She sensed she was close to the surface, she heard voices and a burning pain in her stomach. She tried to surface, reach the voices. She didn't have the strength, darkness overtook her once again.

* * *

"When will she wake up?" Joey asked the question she dreaded to hear the answer to. "We just don't know, we have to wait, there's nothing we can do." Rachel was worried. She should have been awake now. It had been twenty hours since the surgery. "I just don't know!" She sighed. She felt helpless, as a doctor she was used to be able to fix anything, but this, there was nothing more she could do.

"What am I supposed to do? I can't go on without her!" Joey sobbed. Rachel took her in her arms, trying to comfort her. She wanted to say that everything would be OK, but she didn't know that, she just held her.

"I'm sorry," Joey pulled away from her, "It's just so hard, and Ruby, she is not coping at all." She dried off her tears. "It's OK, I'm here for you!" Rachel strokes her back. "Look I have to check some other patients, I be right back, and if there any change, just use the buzzer, OK?" Joey nodded.

She sat beside the bed, holding on to Charlie's hand, trying to feel a movement, something to tell her that she would wake up. For a second she thought she felt a small flutter in her fingers, but it was gone so fast, she was sure she had imagined it. She looked at the heart monitor, it was something comforting about it. The steady beep, the green line making a peak in rhythm with the beat. She was like hypnotized.

"Any change?" Ruby sat down beside her, she shook her head, "I thought I felt a small shiver in her fingers, but I just imagined it." She sighed, looking at Ruby." Did you get to freshen up?" she placed a hand on her cheek. "No, I think I might let Aden take me home, just so I can have a shower and change my clothes, if you think that would be OK?" Ruby looked at her sister.

"Of course that's OK, maybe you should get some sleep too, you didn't sleep much last night. I call you if there's any change, and I ask Aden to stay with you, then he can bring you over when you want to." Joey wanted Ruby to relax for a while, she knew that Aden wouldn't mind doing her the favor of staying with Ruby.

* * *

"Any change?" Rachel came in. "No I don't think so, but…"Joey hesitated, she was sure it was just something she had imagined. "I'm sure I imagined it, but a while ago I thought I felt a small flutter in her fingers. "

Rachel walked up to Charlie, pulling out a small flashlight. "Charlie, it's Rachel, I'm just going to shine some light in your eyes." She talked loud and firm. She put her hand on her forehead, and with her thumb, she pulled up an eyelid. She flashed the light in her eye, pulling it away, shined it in her eye again, back and forth a few times. She didn't say a word. She did the same with her other eye.

She grabbed a hold of her hands, "Charlie, if you can hear me, squeeze my hands!" She was really speaking loud.

Joey was watching she didn't know what to think, she couldn't see any movement in Charlie's hands. A tear escaped.

Rachel turned and faced her, "This is really good, she reacted to the light, both pupils equal." She had a little smile on her lips. It was good, but she hadn't reacted to her touch. She wanted to do some more tests.

"What does that mean?"Joey's voice trembled. "Well, it means that the coma isn't so deep, you can say that she is closer to the surface. It can still take time, and she is not out of the woods, but it's a good sign."

* * *

Charlie was drifting peacefully, it felt rather good. Suddenly a sharp light disturbed her, she tried to get away from it, it hurt. She heard voices again, someone was telling her to squeeze her hands. She tried, but she couldn't move. The effort it took made her slip back down.

Someone was poking her, she felt irritated, she was so tired, all she wanted to was to slip back and relax in the water. The poking continued, it was moving around her body. She wanted to brush it away. It really hurt, she tried to get away from it. The pain disappeared as she sank again.

* * *

Rachel was leaning over Charlie with a needle in her hand. Joey watched her intently, a nurse was there, taking notes of everything Rachel said. She used a lot of medical terms Joey didn't understand. She wanted to ask, but she didn't want to disturb Rachel in her work.

Rachel stretched as she finished. Joey looked at her with tears in her eyes. "Basically, she 's reacting to pain, or she was for a moment, that is really good news, I think we'll have her with us again!" Joey closed her eyes in relief, then she gave Rachel a big hug" Oh, thank you ,thank you, thank you!" I have to call Ruby, she ran out in the hallway to make the call. Ruby decided to take a nap before she came back. Reviled by the news, she felt it would be good with some sleep.

* * *

Joey sat by Charlie's bed, talking to her, telling her everything between heaven and earth, but mostly how much she loved her. She rested her head on Charlie's thigh, holding her hand with one hand, using the other to caress her arm. She lifted her hand and kissed her fingers.

She could feel a light flutter, like butterfly wings on her lip. She froze, was it just an imagination? It came again, this time she was sure. She quickly leaned over and grabbed the buzzer, franticly pushing it. Charlie started to heave as Rachel and a nurse came rushing into the room.

"I think she is waking up!"

* * *

Charlie didn't like what she was feeling, it hurt, she wanted to sink back into the deep. But just as little she had been able to fight the sinking, she couldn't fight floating up. She felt a burning pain in her stomach. It was replaced by the sensation of lips on her fingers, _Joey_, she wanted to touch her.

Then she realized she couldn't breathe, she panicked, something was jammed in her throat, it forced air into her, it was incredible uncomfortable. She tried to fight it, but she couldn't, she felt panic engulf her.

"Charlie, relax, you have a tube in your throat, it helps you breath, relax, and let it do its job!" A calm, but stern voice reached her, she tried to do as it said, it was a little bit better, and she realized she had enough air. It was strange though, having air forced into the lungs. She tried to relax more.

----

"Good, Charlie, you're in hospital, I just have to run some test, and then we try to remove the tube, OK?" Rachel placed a hand on her forehead, trying to settle the panicking woman. She pulled out the flashlight again, lifting her eyelids, this time she tried to close them. Rachel smiled, this was good.

She grabbed her hands, telling her to squeeze, she felt her hands tighten slightly around hers. Rachel's smile broadened. She listened to her lungs, they sounded clear. "OK, let's remove that tube. This will be uncomfortable, but it'll be quick." The nurse prepared for the removal, Rachel disconnected and pulled the tube out.

Rachel expected Charlie to breathe on her own, the lungs sounded OK.

Charlie didn't breathe.

Rachel, slapped her in the face, "Come on, breathe!" She turned quickly to the nurse, " prepare for new intubation, she isn't breathing." She quickly dragged the pillow out under her head, having her flat on the bed. She lifted her chin when Charlie gasped for air. "That's it, come on, you can do it!" Rachel encouraged her, slapping her lightly in the face to keep her breathing.

Joey had watched with her heart beating in her throat, it felt like it would jump out onto the floor. She watched them pull the tube out, she listened for the sound of Charlie breathing, she didn't hear anything. The thought struck her that this had to be what Charlie had felt when she found her when Robbo tried to kill her. If Charlie had been half as scared as she was… the sound of Charlie gasping jolted her back, relief flowed through her body, Charlie was here again!

* * *

Joey leaned over Charlie, looking into her face, this time without any tubes in her mouth, just a small one delivering oxygen to her nose. Her eyes closed, Joey couldn't help it, she leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her lips. "I love you so much Charlie, I can't imagine my life without you!" She felt tears rising to her eyes again.

"I love you too…" Joey could hardly hear the words, but the sound filled her with joy.

* * *

Charlie half sat, half laid in bed. She couldn't stay awake long at the time. She was incredible tired. Rachel had told her what happened. The shootout, the surgery and her arresting on the table. It scared her a little, but she was relieved she made it.

Joey was sitting next to her, Ruby on the other side. It felt good to have the two people she loved the most there. She grabbed a hold of their hands and smiled at them before she slipped away.

She woke by a burning sensation in her stomach, she gasped for air, it was really painful. She heard Joey's voice, "Try to relax I buzzed for help." She tried to relax, but the pain made her muscles cramp, and that again made the pain worse. She groaned.

"just a few minutes, and this will remove the pain, try to relax, if you tighten your muscles it will only make it worse." Rachel was obviously giving her something. She felt the pain recede, and she slipped away again.

* * *

Joey was concerned, Charlie wasn't in a coma any longer, but she was hardly awake. She hadn't managed to say more than those four words "I love you too," she was worried. This was the third day after the surgery, she had hardly left her side.

She had been home to shower and change clothes, but that was it, she had slept in a chair beside Charlie's bed. Ruby had stayed there a lot too, but at least Joey had talked her into staying with Leah at night. This morning Ruby had left to find Xavier. He hadn't been there at all, and Ruby was determined to find out why.

She rose from her chair and sat carefully on the bed next to Charlie, not wanting to wake her. She gently took her hand in hers, just to feel her warmth.

"Hi," Charlie whispered to her. Joey looked at her. "Hi, sleeping beauty!" She smiled.

"I've slept a lot, haven't I?" Her voice was barely audible. "Yes you have," Joey let her hand stroke her gently over her cheek. "I think…" She cleared her throat, it made her stomach hurt, she put her hand over the wound. "Oh, that hurt, but I think I'm back now."


	20. Chapter 20

**Thanks for all your lovely reviews, it's a pleasure writing for you!**

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Ruby was sitting in a chair, looking at her sister sleeping in the hospital bed. A tear trickled down her cheek. "Stop it, he's not worth it!" She mumbled to herself. She tried to focus on her sister, she still slept a lot, but not nearly as much as she did the first few days. The wrapping around her head had been exchanged with a dressing just covering the wound.

She looked fragile though, Ruby felt another tear follow the first one. "Hey, are you OK?" She felt a hand on her head, Joey had come up behind her. Ruby quickly dried off the tears. "Yeah, sure, I'm just worried…" "She's going to be OK, you know, it just takes time." She gave Ruby a hug.

"Excuse me, I just have to…"Ruby stood up and ran out in the corridor. Joey stared perplexed after her. Slowly she followed her. She saw Aden chaticng her in the hall, he motioned to her that he would take care of Ruby.

* * *

Ruby just couldn't stand it, she couldn't talk to Joey or Charlie. Charlie was still too weak, and Joey had enough on her mind. She ran out in the corridor, leaned against the wall and let out a sob. "Hey, come here!" A hand touched her shoulder, she looked up into Aden's face. "You need to talk?" He looked at her with compassion in his eyes. "You know, I can take more of your misery if you need to vent a little more." He smiled at her. She nodded.

She sat in the chough while Aden got her a cup of coffee. It was still difficult to understand what had happened. She let her mind replay the horrible morning. It had started so good with Charlie waking up after three days just sleeping. It was the turning day, she had only gotten better since then.

She had been so relieved that she had decided to take the time to check out what had happened with XavierH he hadn't been there at all, he hadn't answered his phone or replied to any messages. Hugo had said that he didn't know where he was, he was over eighteen, so Xavier had just said that he was going away for a few days.

She was angry with him, she felt like she needed him, it had been horrible to learn that Charlie had been shot. She had been sure that she wouldn't make it. It would have been great to have his support through those difficult days.

She had thought about it on the way over, he hadn't really been there since the trip to Norway where Charlie and Joey had got married. She had her birthday there, and he hadn't even given her a text to say happy birthday.

She knocked on the door to Hugo and Martha's place, without waiting for answer she entered. Hugo was making breakfast. "Hey, How's Charlie doing?" He greeted her. "Better, but is Xavier here?" She didn't feel like carrying a long conversation, she just wanted to see Xavier. "Oh… Yeah, I think he's still in bed…" Ruby didn't let him finish before she headed to his room.

She bursted into his room, and froze in her steps. There wasn't just one blond head in his bed, there was two.

"What the hell!" Ruby yelled. The two jumped up, Xavier looked from Ruby to the girl next to him."Ruby…" He tried to talk, but was abruptly interrupted. "Oh no, this is just… how could you? My sister is dying and you are cheating on me? Go to hell Xavier, just go to hell!" Ruby spat at him and stormed out.

"Ruby, come on Ruby!" Xavier followed her into the living room. She stopped, "What? Are you going to tell me it's not what it looks like, or that she doesn't mean anything, of that you was thinking of me the whole time?" Ruby challenged him.

"Do you know that my sister nearly died while you were out "enjoying" yourself? Do you know that these last five days has been the worst days in my life, and you did not make them any better. Don't you think I needed you, I needed your support, I needed you to be there for me!" Tears were streaming down her face.

"You know what Ruby? Maybe I'm tired of always have to be there for you. I have to defend you when kids at school trash your sister. I have to support you, I have to be there for you, always, always, always. I'm sick and tired of it! I wanted to celebrate your eighteenth, I had plans, but you ran off with your sister and…and… I'm sick of being number two in your life. Your precious sister always comes first. Ruby… Go to hell!"

Ruby was shell shocked. Never had she heard Xavier talk like that. This wasn't her boy. He was always loving and caring. He liked Charlie, he didn't have any problem with Joey, he had always supported them. She stared at him, trying to comprehend what happened. Tears running down her cheeks. She turned and ran.

She ran back home, right into Aden who had come half an hour earlier to pick her up, he was sitting on the porch waiting for her. He saw the state she was in, caught her in his arms, "Hey, what's going on?" He sounded so compassionate that she broke down in his arms, and in between heavy sobs she had told him everything.

"Hey, how's going?" He came back with the coffee. She looked at him, trying to get her lips to form a smile, she didn't succeed very well. "I still can't believe it. I have never seen him cruel or anything. I just don't understand…" She leaned her head in her hands. Aden let one hand rub her back. "I'm sorry girl, do you want me to go and bash him?" Ruby couldn't help but chuckle a little, "Would you?" Aden smiled, "Anything for you girl, but I don't think your sister would be to impressed, or maybe she would. She'll probably bust him for something and put him away for a long time when she gets out of here!"

Ruby squirmed. "What, you haven't told her? Have you told Joey?" Aden looked sternly at her. "Well… no I haven't Charlie is still weak, and Joey has enough on her mind…" Ruby wanted to tell, but she felt that she couldn't add another burden. "They have enough with themselves."

"That's rubbish, you know that! Charlie wants to be there for you, Joey too, you have to tell them."

* * *

Charlie felt a warm hand on her arm. She smiled, she hadn't woken once without that hand touching her. She opened her eyes and saw a sleeping Joey with her head on the mattress beside her. She lifted her hand and stroke her hair. Joey was instantly awake.

"Hi sleeping beauty!" Charlie smiled at her, her voice was still weak, but at least it worked. "Hi" Joey looked at her. "Can I give you a kiss?" Joey looked at her with eyes full of hope. She smiled wider, "Yeah, I think you can!"

Joey rose and leaned over her, carefully she brushed her lips. "You call that a kiss? Come on you can do better!" Charlie teased her, causing a big grin from Joey who leaned in and gave her a proper kiss. Charlie opened her mouth and invited her in. It felt so good to again be able to enjoy the taste and feeling of her, she protested a little when Joey pulled back.

"I don't want to tire you out, you need to rest!" She smiled cheeky, "and getting your heart racing isn't good for you right now!" Charlie giggled, and was instantly reminded why that wasn't a good idea.

"Hi, good to see you awake!" Rachel entered the room, "How are you feeling?" Rachel opened her chart and flipped through it. "I feel.. not too bad, but I have to admit it hurts. Was I shot with a bazooka?" She tried to joke, but it really did hurt. Rachel smiled at her, "I'll give you some painkiller, and I'll change the dressing, I want to have a look, OK?" Charlie nodded.

"OK, let's check your head first." Rachel moved around, organized all the stuff she needed, and got to work. "Now this might hurt a little when I remove the dressing, but I'll be careful." Charlie flinched when she started to pull it off. "Nearly there, just try to relax!" Rachel felt her reaction, but she had to get it off. She inspected the wound, it looked like it healed well, no infections. "This is good, it heals really nice Charlie, I don't think you will get any visible scaring, and the rest will be hidden in your hair."

Charlie sighed of relief, she had worried about that, it wasn't exactly a dream of hers to have a big scar running across her face. "OK, let's have a look at your stomach."Rachel moved the covers down and lifted her shirt up to her ribcage. Charlie couldn't help but watch, she hadn't seen the wound yet, she had been sleeping whenever they changed the dressing. Rachel started to peel of the layers.

Charlie felt her heart beating faster, and when Rachel removed the final layer, she couldn't believe her eyes. It looked horrible. "Oh God, "she whispered, she felt sick. The scar was long and crooked, and her stomach was covered by bruising. No wonder it hurt!

"Hey, it's not as bad as it looks, the bruising and the swelling makes it look horrible, but it will be fine. I promise you." Rachel saw her reaction. "It… it looks awful…" A tear escaped from Charlie's eye. "I don't want to sound shallow, and I'm grateful to be alive, but that looks horrible!"

Joey had been standing in a corner, no one had told her to leave, so she stayed. She had looked as Rachel removed the dressing. It didn't look good. No wonder she was in pain. She heard what Charlie said, she just had to hold her, comfort her.

She walked over and sat down opposite to where Rachel was standing. "Charlie, honey, Rachel is right, it'll be fine! Remember the bruising on my back, after Robbo slammed me into the railing? It looked horrible, but it disappeared. The same will happen to you! And I mean, you have to have a small scar to show off when you tell about being shot, or no one will believe you!" Charlie looked up at her, biting the inside of her lower lip, it was so like Joey to make her smile, she just had to smile at her.

"You're right, I'm sorry, I was just taken back for a moment." She smiled at Joey as she leaned in and gave her a kiss.

* * *

"Hi, can I come in?" Ruby peaked true the door. "Sure, Rubs, come here!" Charlie patted the bed beside her. Ruby gave her a big smile, it was so good to see her sister awake and alert. She made her way over and carefully placed a kiss on her cheek.

"Hey girls, I'm just on my way out of here, I just wanted to check in first!" Aden came into the room. "Good to see you awake Charlie!" Aden gave her hand a squeeze. "I'll be by later, anything you need?" Charlie shook her head. "OK, see you later!" He gave Joey a hug before he walked to the door. Just before slipping out he turned to them "By the way, Ruby has something she needs to share with you!" He winked and smiled at Ruby before disappearing.

"What did he mean?" Charlie looked into her sister's face. A tear escaped from her eye, she lifted her hand and dried it off. "What's the matter Rubs?" Ruby was uncomfortable, she didn't want to burden them. "I… I just been so scared for you, I didn't know if you would make it…" That was at least half the truth. She looked everywhere but on her sister. "Aw, Rubs, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to scare you!" Charlie took a hold of her hand. "I know that, it's not your fault that you where shot!" Ruby looked down on their hands. She lifted her eyes and found her sisters.

"There's something else…" She couldn't keep it to herself any longer. "I broke up with Xavier…" More tears found their way down her cheek. "Why?" Joey's voice made her shift her eyes from Charlie's to Joey's , she found wells of compassion looking back at her.

"I went over there yesterday, and he… he… there was a girl in his bed… He has been cheating on me." More tears ran down her face, Joey stood up and gathered her in her arms. She cried into her shoulder.

She recomposed herself, Charlie grabbed hold of her hand. "He told me that he was sick of always having to support me, he was sick of you, of us. He didn't even bother to break up with me before he hooked up with that slut!"

Charlie reached for her and pulled her down, "Come here Sis, I'm sorry."

"I can't lean on you you're hurt!" Ruby resisted Charlie. "There's nothing wrong with my shoulder, just don't put your arms over me, come on, lay here for a bit, I want you to!" Charlie pulled her down until she lay down beside her, head on her shoulder.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Joey looked concerned, she loved Ruby. "Do you want me to go and bash him? I learned a few tricks working on trawlers!" Joey was angry, she wanted to hurt the one that had hurt Ruby.

Ruby giggled a little, "You have to fight Aden for that, He has already offered to rearrange his face for me." "So you have talked to Aden about it?" Charlie asked her.

"Yeah, he was there to pick me up when I came home that morning, I told him, he was there so…"

"Good ol' Aden, he is a good friend, and he has the gift of showing up to talk when ever it's needed." Joey smiled. He had been there many times for Charlie and her. Ruby nuzzled into her sister. "You know, maybe I should find me a girl too… Don't you have any little sisters you haven't told us about Joey?"


	21. Chapter 21

Hi everybody! I'm sorry to disappoint you who think this is a new chapter. It's not, I have a question for you. I'm thinking about whether I should start to wrap up this story, which will mean about 4 -5 more chapters, or if I should keep it going. So I figured I should ask you who read it, what do you want?

I love writing this story, and I look forward to hear from you!


	22. Chapter 22

**I'm sorry I disappointed you all earlier today, but here are some more mush:) Thank you for all the feedback on whether I should keep the story going or not, I have decided that I will keep it going as long as I have something to write about********I'm really glad that you all enjoy it so much, I have to say I like writing it too. **

**Just a little comment on this chapter. I haven't experienced this on my own, I have borrowed the experience from a dear friend of mine. **

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"I hate you so much right now Charlie, how could you do this to me?"Joey looked at her with bloodshot eyes, her body shaking. She was making intimate friends with the toilet bowl. "I'm sorry Joey, it won't last forever you know. " Charlie held Joey's hair and rubbed her back, trying to ease her discomfort.

She looked at her, still hanging over the bowl. "I can't believe that I was so happy when I took the test and the blue line appeared, had I known this, I would have cried!" Charlie couldn't help but giggle at her, Joey shot a dirty look back at her. "Just wait till it's your turn, but then you probably just sail true it as if nothing is happening!"

She started to dry heave, cramps ran through her body. Charlie grabbed a better hold of her hair to keep her from getting it in the toilet. She was actually a little worried, she had never seen anybody suffer as badly from morning sickness as Joey did.

The heaving stopped, and Joey collapsed on the floor, leaning into Charlie. It really took a toll on her throwing up so much. "Are you OK honey?" Charlie pulled her close, supporting her limp body. She nodded, she felt awful, but at least the urge to heave had stopped. Charlie let her hand rest on her stomach. "I'm sorry you get so sick, but think, there's a little Joey in there." She kissed the top of her head.

"You are very welcome to carry him or her for me," Joey turned her head and gave her half a smile. "I know I won't be sick forever, but right now, It's hard to think about a time I didn't feel nausious." She grabbed a hold of the sink to pull herself up from the floor. Charlie jumped up behind her to help her.

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"Are you OK on your own?" Charlie stood behind the chough, looking down on her."Maybe I should take the day off?" Joey looked up at her, "You know, you can't take the day off every time I'm sick, then you would never get to go to work, I'll be fine. I'll just relax here for a while, and I'll probably take a little walk later on, don't worry, I'll be fine!" She put her hand around her neck and pulled her down for a kiss.

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Charlie was concerned, she wasn't sure if it was a good idea to go to work, but Joey was right, she couldn't stay with her all the time. She smiled to herself, that was really all she wanted to. Work didn't seem important anymore.

After being shot a year earlier her view on her job has changed. She wasn't sure if she wanted to be a cop anymore, but she wasn't sure about what she wanted to do. So for the time being she continued. It just seemed that life was too precious to take the chance on being killed at work.

With a kid on the way, she was really ready for a career change, she was thinking about quitting her job when Joey was due, and take some time just being a mum. She smiled, the thought was really appealing. She loved the thought of them being parents. The strain of thoughts brought her back to Joey. She would give Rachel a call when she got to work and have her check up on her.

* * *

Joey woke up being nauseous again. She laid on the chough trying to control it. To her relief the nausea went away. She let her hand rest on her stomach. She smiled as she thought of the life that was growing inside of her. Rachel had worked wonders for them, and organized everything. Two months earlier they had gotten the OK from the sperm bank. They had been excited and nervous, they had made a weekend out of it, enjoying themselves before the appointment Monday.

She had been a little nervous for the procedure, but with Charlie by her side it all went smoothly. The doctor had prepared everything when he suddenly turned to Charlie and asked if she wanted to do it. He was holding a shot connected to a thin tube, and all she had to do was push the small piston down.

Joey let out a little giggle at the thought of the expression on Charlie's face. She looked both shocked and trilled. She had leaned over her and asked if she wanted her to. Joey had given her a kiss and nodded. She wanted Charlie to give her babies. They went out afterwards for a better dinner, and in the night they had made babies on their own.

It really felt like it was Charlie's baby. When they had looked through pictures, they had chosen to look at the upper part of the face, to find someone with eyes that looked like Charlie's. They had found one, and Joey couldn't wait to see a little baby with Charlie's eyes.

Thinking about it made her feel really good. She decided to take a walk down to the Diner, maybe Charlie would drop by there, and Leah was at work, so it would be nice chance to catch up with her. She hadn't socialized much for the past couple of weeks, being as sick as she was.

* * *

"Hi, Joey! Nice to see you!" Leah greeted her as soon as she walked through the doors. "Come on, have a seat, do you want something?" Leah gave her a hug and guided her over to the chough. Joey stopped by the counter. "Good to see you to Leah, maybe some apple juice?"

Leah leaned over the counter, she lowered her voice as she spoke "How are you feeling? " They hadn't told anyone but their absolutely closest friends. They had decided that the rest of the town would find out soon enough, no need to provide gossip before it was necessary. Therefore, Leah didn't want anyone to hear, but she knew that Joey had a hard time.

"Actually, I didn't know that a person could throw up as much as I do!" Joey smiled half-heartedly. "Oh poor you, I didn't have much trouble at all, just a little morning sickness in the very beginning." Leah put her hand on top of Joey's, giving it a little squeeze. "You don't look good, you get to eat and drink enough?" Leah studied her, she didn't look good at all. "I try, but it's…"

"Oh hello pet!" Colleen interrupted them, "Isn't it a wonderful day, and look at this, don't you want some for Lunch?" Colleen passed two plates of egg and bacon under her nose. Irene came right behind her, she saw the expression in Joey's face. "Colleen, bring that to the people who ordered it!" She motioned Colleen away.

Irene joined Leah, "Are you OK?" They both asked at the same time. Joey felt her stomach churn, she tried to swallow as she looked at them with desperate eyes. She clutched her hand on her mouth and ran out of there. "Call Charlie and Rachel!" Leah shouted over her shoulder as she followed her.

She found Joey hanging on the railing, her body heaving. She grabbed a hold of her waist to support her. "Are you OK?" She pulled her hair back. Joey couldn't answer, the heaves was massive. "I made Irene call Charlie and Rachel, They'll be here soon." She was worried, this wasn't normal.

Joey collapsed on the ground, she didn't have any strength left, the heaves raging through her body took all her energy. Cramps still made her body jerk. It was really painful, there was nothing coming up, not even bile.

"Oh God, Joey, oh I shouldn't have left you!" she felt Charlie's arm s lifting her up in sitting position. She opened her eyes and looked straight into blue eyes filled with concern. "Hi, Joey, how are you feeling?" Rachel came in view beside her. She took her face in her hands, studying her. "You're sick, have you been able to eat and drink?" Rachel looked sternly at her. She shook her head, "I try, but it always makes a u-turn."

Rachel pinched the top of her hand, "You are dehydrated, I think we'll have to take you to the hospital and give you some fluids." Joey didn't have any strength to protest. Charlie pulled her up and she and Rachel help her over to Charlie's car.

"Hey, how are you feeling?" Rachel came into the room. Joey sat in bed with Charlie's arm around her shoulders. She smiled at her "Much better, what did you give me?" "It's just some medication that reduces the nausea, it's not common that people has the degree of morning sickness as you do, but this too will pass!" She smiled at her as she flipped through her charts. It's two months now, right?" Joey nodded. "Usually the nausea seas after the first trimester, so most likely you have one month to go." Joey sighed. Rachel smiled at her. "I'll give you medication you can take, it will make you feel a whole lot better, I promise you, you'll survive!"

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"Hey, Charlie, look!" it was Sunday and Charlie, Ruby and her had a late breakfast together, Joey was laughing. "I have never lost anything in my cleavage before!" She was hardly able to control her movements as she fished for the piece of cucumber that had slipped from her sandwich.

Ruby looked at her, tomato red, she worried that one of those "Too much information" moments where on its way. Charlie nearly choked on her piece of toast. "Do you need help?" She giggled. A sigh escaped Ruby, she was used to their affection, but the line had to be drawn somewhere. "As I have said a thousand times before; get a room alright!"

They looked at each other, finding Ruby's suggestion quite appealing. "Good idea Rubs, see you later!" Joey pulled Charlie to her feet, and left a dark red Ruby sitting there.

"It's kind of rude to leave her alone, isn't it?" Joey pulled Charlie close and kissed her. "Well, she can blame herself, giving us such brilliant ideas. Besides, I'm sure she's not going to hang here for long, she told me that she was going to meet up with some "friends", which means Aden." Charlie let her hands wander down Joey's back. Joey pulled of her top, "Yeah, it's good, those two together I mean, Aden is a great guy…talk about something good…" She let her lips wander down her neck. "So, did you find the lost object?" Charlie let her hands run down Joey. "I can help you look!" She teased her as she pulled of her tanktop. "Hmmm, something have definitely changed here!" She smiled and kissed her as her hands cupped her breasts.

A moan of pleasure escaped Joey as Charlie focused on her. One "side effect" of being pregnant was that her skin was incredible sensitive. The feeling of Charlie's hands and mouth filled her with passion. She pushed her down on the bed. Sitting on top of her she leaned down and kissed her, nibbling on her lower lip, playing with her tongue. Everything building up under the fire inside. Charlie pushed her up again, "I want to see you!" She let her hands run from her neck, down her chest dwelling on the bump on her stomach, it wasn't big, even though she was six months pregnant.

"You're so beautiful, I love you pregnant, I love feeling the little life inside of you!" She whispered, pulling her down for another kiss. Carefully Charlie rolled her over, placing herself on top, she supported herself on her arms and knees, not wanting to put any weight on her. She leaned down and kissed her again, played with her. "I want to taste you!" She whispered into her mouth, and with that started to trace paths down her body.

Charlie lay on her back, with her arm under Joey's head, which were facing her sideways. She let her free hand rest on Joey's stomach, feeling small movements in it. "I think we woke the little one!" She giggled. She turned her head and placed a kiss on Joey's forehead. "How are you feeling?"

Joey wrapped her arm tighter around her, placing a leg over hers. "I'm feeling wonderful, satisfied, hungry for more…"She gave her a cheeky grin. "There's something about this pregnancy. First I couldn't stop throwing up, when that stopped, it made me a horny teenager. Rachel said it's the hormones, but seriously, I want you all the time!" She kissed her chin.

Charlie laughed, "you know, I promised I would hold your hair when you had morning sickness. Well I'm still at your service, whatever you might need me for.!" She grinned, let her hand find the leg wrapped over hers.


	23. Chapter 23

**Thank you all for your great reviews, hope you enjoy this chap. too:) More mush heading your way:)**

Charlie was relieved, it was her last day at work, at least for a year. She had applied for leave. It would give her time to be with Joey and the baby, it would give her time to figure out what she wanted to do.

She looked around her office, she was not going to miss it. She leaned back and relaxed. It was good to know that all the files she needed to do was done, there were no loose ends. It felt good to be able to leave work, knowing that she had done her very best.

"Sergeant," Watson called for her attention, "Would you please join us out here?" Charlie rose, she joined the rest of the staff in the reception area. Everyone of her colleagues were there, the chief of the station cleared his throat:

"Sergeant, we just wanted to thank you for the years you have been here at the station. We want to thank you for the excellent work you have done, and we will miss your quick assessments, your ability to make fast and correct decisions. We'll miss your humor, and the good atmosphere you bring to this place. We also want to wish you all the best for the new addition to your family, we are all very happy for you. We hope to see you back here in a year!"

The speech was followed with cheering and applause. Charlie felt her cheeks burn, she smiled at them, she liked her coworkers, she had enjoyed working there. "Ehh… Thank you guys, I have enjoyed working with you all. We have become friends, and I'll miss you!" To her surprise, she felt tears escaping from her eyes. She laughed a little and dried them off. The chief gave her a huge bunch of flowers, followed by a hug. "When the baby comes, you'll have to stop by and show off, OK?"

"Hi," Watson made her way over to her, "I just want to tell you that it has been a privilege working with you, and I consider you to be one of my friends… I'll miss you, but I do understand why you take a year off. "A tear found its way down her cheek, she quickly dried it off while mumbling "Stupid!"

"Watson, It has been a true honor to work with you!" Charlie smiled at her, "you are a friend, and I hope not only at work, but that we can be friends privately too…I guess I have to get used to calling you Georgina!" "Oh, don't you dear!"Watson frowned at her, "its George!" She laughed and gave her a hug.

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"Honey, I'm home!" Charlie called out as soon as she stepped through the door. A very pregnant Joey appeared from the living room. "Hey, how was your last day?" She smiled at her. "It was good, and sad, and a little funny. It's strange to think that I'm not going back there in a very long time…" She smiled at her, "But I'm glad I can be here with you!"

Joey looked at her, lifted one of her eyebrows and grinned, she stepped closer and let a finger follow her shirt buttons down, "Well I hope they let you keep the uniform!" She leaned in and kissed her. Charlie giggled and kissed her back, "it's getting hard to reach you, someone is in the way!" She smiled at her and placed her hands on her tummy. She felt feet kicking her hand, she followed the movement. "Beanie here is awake and eager to meet the world I think!" It was amazing to feel the movement under her hand. "Beanie, you are not calling our baby Beanie!" Joey said half serious, half teasing. "You know how easily nicknames stuck, we're not having a kid named Beanie!" She frowned at her, but wasn't able to keep the mask on, she cracked laughing.

"How on earth did you come up with that name?" Charlie giggled, "I was just thinking of you when you used to work on trawlers, you always had that thing on your head, you looked so cute with it on. And I think our baby is going to be just as cute!" She gave her a kiss. Joey giggled, it was a long time since she had used a beanie. "I'll make a deal with you, if you were your uniform, I'll wear my beanie!" She gave her a cheeky grin.

Charlie giggled "deal!" She leaned over Joey and kissed her again.

* * *

Joey lay on her side in bed. She was big, but she had seen pregnant women who were bigger, and Rachel had told her that she was smaller than normal, but she felt like a whale. Her back hurt, she had to go pie what felt like every ten minute, and her feet hurt.

It was amazing though to feel the baby move, but it had a nasty habit of kicking up at her ribs, that really hurt. Unlike the first time she felt a movement. It had felt like butterfly wings flapping on the inside. She had been taken by surprise, she had actually run over to the station to find Charlie, of course by the time she came there the butterfly wings had stopped.

They had retreated into her office, she had been sitting on Charlie's lap for a long time. They had talked about names and dreamed of how the baby would look. It had been an amazing time, even thought the surroundings wasn't exactly romantic. She sat whit her head leaning on Charlie's shoulder, just enjoying being close. Suddenly the baby had started to move again. She quickly grabbed Charlie's hands and guided them. Charlie was wide eyed of amazement. She could feel the little movement under her skin. Tears had started to run, she was so happy.

When they went to the first ultrasound more tears had run. Seeing the little heart beat inside gave them an indescribable feeling. The miracle of having a baby growing inside had overwhelmed her, them both. They had cried, kissed, laughed. Seeing the little baby was mind blowing.

They didn't know what sex it was, they had decided they wanted to be surprised. It made it fun to think about names. They had joked and been serious, they had thought about everything from Joey and Charlie to playing with the two names, Jarlie, Choey, Coja, Che Guevara, none of them serious of course, but it gave them a good laugh. They had finally settled for Jordan if it was a boy and Rebecca for a girl.

"Hey, how are you feeling?" Charlie came into the bedroom carrying a glass of water. "Little Beanie here is practicing soccer and thinks that my ribs is the ball!" She groaned. "It hurts, I think I need a kiss to make it better." "Aw, you know your wish is my command!" Charlie sat down beside her and kissed her tummy. "I think you were right about that name thing, you have started to call the baby Beanie too!" She grinned at her.

Joey smiled back, placing a hand on her cheek. It was really good to have Charlie there, it was only two weeks left, and that meant that the baby could come any day. She was a little bit anxious about the actual birth, but it was no way around that part.

She felt safe with Charlie, and Rachel would be the midwife, she wasn't specially trained to be one, but Joey wanted her. She knew her, and Rachel had been there through the whole process. It would be nice to have her there at the finish line. Joey felt comfortable with her. She still didn't like hospitals, but at least with Rachel it wouldn't be that bad.

Charlie looked at Joey. She was so beautiful. She had heard people talking about the "glow" pregnant women got, but she had never seen it, until Joey got it. It was a glow, her skin and eyes shined. She sat down behind Joey, pulled up her shirt and started to give her lower back a massage, resulting in little sounds of comfort from her, it reminded her of a cat purring. She let her hands work the sore muscles.

Her mind wandered as she worked, she thought about the day they finally got the OK signal from the sperm bank, Rachel had really worked wonders for them. She thought about the fun and a little bit strange experience of searching through photos of donors, they could only see half of the face, and they had to choose either the upper or the lower part. They had found one with eyes like hers.

She thought about the day Joey took the test, they had been so nervous, they had stared at the test as if it was the Holy Grale. The five minutes they had to wait before the result was ready had seemed as long as years. They had laughed and cried when the blue line appeared. It was amazing. It wasn't that amazing to see Joey get so sick though.

She had thrown up constantly for almost four months. At times she had been so worried, that she got Rachel to give her sick leave to be with Joey. After the incident at the Diner, she wasn't about to let Joey be alone when she was really sick. The medication Rachel had given her helped, but some days nothing helped.

She got through it though, but then her hormones had turned her into an emotional rollercoaster. Happy and laughing on minute, crying the next. It hadn't been easy to live with her, but she was never angry, or lost her temper, it was just a lot of emotions.

Being so emotional unsteady had caused Joey to question her ability to be a mother. They had talked a lot about her parents, how her mother had left her when she was little and her father drinking and hitting her. It had been good to talk, they had even used Rachel as a counselor to work through issues. Having a professional to talk with had been a God sent. She had given them tools to work with, dealing with memories and thoughts.

The hormones didn't just make her emotional unstable, they also turned her into a horny teenager. Charlie giggled on the inside. Joey would be all over her whenever she got a chance. Not that she mined, she wasn't hard to ask, she could never get enough of her either. It had been fun, crazy, and real good.

She lied down behind Joey, spooning. She caressed her stomach, feeling little movements under her hand. She smiled and kissed her shoulder. "I love you Charlie, thank you for being so good to me!" Joey found Charlie's hand, placing it on top of hers, following the movement. "Love you too, Joey, I'll always be good to you!"

* * *

Joey woke up by someone pinching her tummy. She felt around for Charlie's hand wondering what she meant by poking her in the middle of the night. She found her hand resting across her chest. It hadn't been her. She entwined their fingers and fell asleep again.

Another pinch woke her. Their fingers were still entwined, it hadn't been Charlie. She held her breath, trying to feel it again. Nothing, she assumed it was just a twitch. Drifting back to sleep again, a third twitch made her wide awake. She untangled their fingers, and let her hand run over her tummy. She felt her muscles tighten once again. She realized that she was in labor.

Charlie woke from her dreamless sleep by Joey shaking her. "Mmm, Honey, is it morning?" She smiled and snuggled closer to her. "Charlie, I think the baby is coming" She jumped up, "What? Now? It's the middle of the night? Are you in Labor? How long between the pangs? Where are your clothes? We have to go! " She felt herself panic. She didn't expect that, she prided herself of always being cool headed and level minded.

"Charlie, it's no rush, it's not like the baby is going to jump out right here on the floor! Remember Rachel told us that it would take time. The pangs isn't even painful yet." She had to smile at a slightly out of control Charlie.

Charlie took a deep breath, leaned over the bed and kissed her. "OK, but let's get moving, I want you in safe hands at the hospital!"

At that point the pangs decided to turn up the intensity. Joey squirmed from the pain. She unvoluntarily let out a whimper. "I'll take back what I said, this hurts!"

Charlie was back in her "cop" mode, she only focused on getting Joey to the hospital. She found clothes for her, got her up and help her towards the car. They had to make some stops on the way out, the pangs would cause Joey to double over, her knees almost give away as the pain surged through her body. Charlie held her, doing her best to comfort her. All that was in her head was to get her into the car and get her to the hospital. She practically dragged her out.

She sped towards the hospital, every groan from Joey hit her heart. They were very aware that giving birth was painful, but it didn't make it any easier to hear her pain.

She counted the minutes between each pang, when suddenly there was none. Charlie kept her eyes partly on the road, partly on her watch. "Joey, what's going on?" She was worried. "I… I don't know, they kind of quit. I feel fine, I don't know…" Joey was befuddled. The pain had vanished as dew for the sun.

They arrived at the hospital, still no more pangs. They was shown into a room and a doctor came to examine Joey. It didn't take him long to figure out what was going on. He smiled at them "You just had Braxton-Hicks' no worries, it's real common. Just go home, relax, rest. The baby will come, but not today!"

Charlie was relieved, She stroke Joey over the hair, "Let's get you home again!" She kissed her.

Joey sat in the car, Charlie's hand resting on her thigh. She bit on a finger nail. The experience of having false labor had made her worry. It was so painful, and it hadn't even been the real deal. She wondered if she would be able to go through it, but it wasn't like there was any way of avoiding it. She sighed, she didn't want this.

Charlie heard her sigh, glancing over at her she saw the worried expression on her face. "What's wrong? Are you in pain?"Joey felt a tear run down her face. She felt like a coward. How many women before her had given birth and lived to tell the tail? She was ashamed to be so scared.

"Hey, honey, talk to me!" Charlie pulled the car over, loosened her seat belt and turn to face Joey. She was facing away from her, staring out the window. She put her hand under her chin turning her head so they faced each other. "What's wrong?" Joey looked at her with tears running down her face. "I'm such a coward… I don't… It scared me. Charlie it was so painful, and it wasn't even real, I don't know if I can do this, and there's not like I can magically skip the birth, the baby has to come out." She stared down at her stomach.

"Joey, it's OK to be scared, but you know, you're strong, You get through it, I know you will, and I'll be with you, every step!" She leaned over and kissed her. "I love you, you can do this!"

Joey looked back at her, giving her a half-hearted smile, "I guess, it's not any use in worrying, it's going to happen no matter what."

* * *

"I'm going to stay, I want to be here, you'll need help, and I want to be here when my sister has her first baby!" Ruby's voice boomed through the house. "I'm not going back to uni, they manage without me, you can't make me!" Ruby came marching in to the living room, collapsed on the cough beside Joey. "My sister is so stubborn, she thinks she can still dictate what I should or shouldn't do." She frowned."I'm grown up now, not a baby!" She shouted over her shoulder.

Joey looked at her with a smile on her lips. "you know, Charlie is probably right, we don't know when the baby is going to decide it's time to meet the world, and you'll miss a lot of classes if you stay here."

"See Rubs, Joey agrees with me, you should go back to the city." Charlie came in from the kitchen."But I wouldn't be able to make it in time if I have to go all the way from the city, I want to be here, I want to be the first one to see my niece or nephew, after you two of course. I want to be here to help you, it's going to be quite a change with a baby in the house. You'll need the help. Besides, I don't have many classes the next few weeks, I can easily study on my own!" She pulled up her best puppy eye look. Begging her sister, "Please don't make me go, let me stay!"

She rose and put her arms around her sister, resting her head on her shoulder, "You don't really want me to go, do you?"

Charlie didn't want her to go, she smiled and giggled, looking at Joey over her head."OK, you can stay… Of course I want you here!" Ruby laughed and kissed her on the cheek, before she rejoined Joey on the chough, letting her hand rest on her tummy. "Hi little Beanie, your auntie speaking, can't wait to meet you!"

* * *

Charlie and Ruby was walking hand in hand down the beach, it was such a beautiful day, and they had just felt for a little breather. Joey hadn't looked good that morning but she insisted on them taking a little walk while she had a nap.

"Are you exited?" Ruby looked at her sister, they had found a place to sit down, looking out over the ocean. "Yeah, I am, imaging... I'm going to be a mum, I'm going to have a kid!" She looked at Ruby, smiling from ear to ear. She turned and looked over the sea again, her smile reseeded. "I'm a little worried about the brith though. I know that Joey is a little afraid of the pain… I guess I would be too…" She paused.

Ruby put an arm around her back, "You'll be a great mum, Joey too. This is going to be the luckiest kid in the world, just like me. You know, you've had me to practice on, of course not the baby thing, but the parenting thing. You have taken care of me since I was fourteen, that's more than five years. I think you've done a great job, and I'm so happy that I'm your sister. You'll do a terrific job with Beanie too!" she laughed, "It's going to be hard to get rid of that name, poor kid!"

Charlie laughed too, she had realized that her joke had stuck, Beanie had become the official nickname on the baby.

Her phone rang, it was Joey. She jumped up as she answered, "Joey, are you OK…? Oh my God, we'll be right there!" She hung up and took off running. "Rubs, the baby is coming!"


	24. Chapter 24

**Thank you all for the great reviews! You keep me going, it's a pleasure writing for you (and myself) Hope you enjoy this!**

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Joey had felt cramps all morning, they wasn't hard, and she figured it was just false pangs again. She didn't want to worry Charlie, so she didn't say anything. They had left for a walk when the pangs had started to pick up.

She left the bed to find her phone, a pang hit her, feeling like it would tear her body apart, she fell to the floor, clutching to her tummy. This was not like last time. She breathed while the pain ran through her body, centering around her spine before it left. She got up and found the phone. Dialing Charlie's number.

Another contraction made her knees give away, she supported herself to the kitchen table waiting for the pain to ease. It lifted and she figured she needed to get her bag with the baby stuff. Another one caught her of guard as she got her stuff out of the bedroom, again making her knees give away. She collapsed on the bed, grabbing a hold of the sheets. This was really painful.

"Joey, where are you!" Charlie's voice reached her ears. She stood up and walked towards the kitchen, half way a new pang, and she grabbed a hold of the chough. She groaned as the pain again ripped her body apart.

She felt arms around her, supporting her. "Joey, why didn't you say anything earlier?" Charlie held her. "I wasn't sure it was real," Joey panted. "I didn't want to worry you."

---

"Oh God, this hurts!" Joey had trouble breathing through the contractions. Ruby coached her while Charlie focused on the road. She was speeding towards the hospital. Joey's groans of pain made it difficult to concentrate. After what seemed like an eternity, they turned off to the hospital. Ruby rushed in to get help. Charlie took Joey's arm over her shoulder and almost dragged her in. half way there a new pang hit her, harder than the previous ones. "Oh my… I think my water just broke!" She looked up at Charlie. "Come on let's get you inside." Charlie took a better hold of her and practically carried her inside.

Two nurses met them with a bed, Joey collapsed on it. Rachel came up to them as Joey was wheeled through the reception. "So, this is it then" She smiled at them. "Let's get you into your room." She smiled at Ruby who followed right behind them, "Maybe you should give those you want to know a call, I'm sure Leah would love to be here!" Charlie nodded to her, "do that, and Aden, I know he wants to be here too!"

* * *

"Hey, you're doing really well!" Charlie was sitting behind Joey in the bed, supporting her upper body with her own. A pang had just surged through her body, it was difficult for Joey to breathe. As the pang reseeded, she tried to catch her breath again. Sweat ran down her face, Charlie was drenched from the sweat oozing from her back, in addition of her own. She took a cold cloth, wiping down Joey's face, gently leaning her head back on her shoulder so she could rest.

She panted, grabbing a hold of Charlie's wrist as a new contraction started. Charlie was amazed of the strength in her grip, it would leave her with serious bruising. Not that it mattered, a little bruising was a small price to pay.

Rachel came up to the bed, "I just have to check how much you have dilated." Rachel checked, she was careful, knowing what Joey had experienced in the past. "OK, you have pretty much full opening, it won't be long." Joey barely nodded.

* * *

"Hi Ruby, how's she doing?" Leah came rushing through the doors. "She haven't had the baby yet, but Rachel said it wouldn't be long." She greeted Leah with a hug. "I'm so glad you could come, it always feels so safe when you're around!" Leah smiled at her, "not ten wild horses could hold me back, poor Colleen , she was a little bit flabbergasted as I just ran out of there." She giggled. "Come let's have a coffee while we wait."

Ruby twisted the cup between her hands, she was a little nervous. "Leah, how is it to give birth? I mean you had VJ and Pippa." Leah smiled at her, "Yeah, I had VJ when I was younger than Joey, and to put it this way, it hasn't scared me away from wanting one more. Of course it hurts, but you forget it when you finally have the little one in your arms. It's such a miracle to see the life that has been growing inside of you for so long. You are connected in such an extraordinary way, yet you have never seen the person. When you get the baby in your arms, it's just a miracle. I can't describe it." Leah lifted her hand and pushed Ruby's hair back from her shoulders.

"It is really painful, it feels like your body is ripped apart, and it's terrible when you have the urge to push, and the midwife tells you to wait, that's so hard. You can't control the pangs, and it hurts to push, but you have to. The body takes over, it works by instinct, we are made to give birth." Leah let her hand wander from Ruby's hair to her shoulder. "You don't have to worry, Joey is going to do just fine, and soon you'll be auntie Ruby!" She smiled at her.

* * *

Joey found it hard to breathe. The pangs raged through her body, She wanted to push, but it hurt so bad that she tried to resist. Charlie was holding her, she found her arms and buried her fingers in her as the contraction intensified. She couldn't hold back a groan. The pang lifted, she leaned back on Charlie, feeling her body against her back was comforting. "You're doing real good, I love you," Charlie whispered. She let her hand rest across her forehead, leaning her head against her shoulder.

"You are doing real great, on the next contraction, I want you to push, OK?" Rachel's calm but firm voice made her focus. She nodded. She braced herself, waiting for the next. Charlie held her arms around her. She could feel the contraction. She leaned forward slightly, Charlie followed her movement and coached her breathing. Her arms lay across the top of her stomach, she could feel the muscles retract. Joey held her breath before the pain made her let it out in a deep guttural groan.

"Good, I can see the head, keep pushing!" Rachel was ready to deliver the baby. Joey leaned back for a moment, before a new pang sat in, forcing a new groan out of her.

"Come on, Beanie is almost here Honey!" Charlie spoke to her ear. All kinds of feelings were rushing through her. She was sorry for the pain Joey had to endure, exited to meet the new baby. Scared of the responsibility waiting for them. In pain from Joey's vise around her arms.

"Here's the head!" Rachel glanced up at them before she concentrated on her job. "Don't push right now, Joey, the baby has to turn, give it a second!"

Joey panted, Charlie found her hands and entwined their fingers. "I love you girl!" She whispered into her ear. "OK, on the contraction, push, and little Beanie will be her!" Joey gasped for air a few times, leaned over and pushed.

Rachel supported the head and received the rest of the tiny body. He started to cry as soon as his body made contact with the air. She lifted him up, "it's a boy!" she placed him on Joey's chest.

Charlie was mesmerized. He was so beautiful. All wrinkly, cover in blood and other fluids, she had never seen such a beautiful thing. "Wow…Joey…" She shocked. Gently she let her hand cup his head. He was warm and slick under her touch. She let her fingers follow his arm down to his tiny hand. She put her pinky in his hand, immediately he latched on.

Charlie let her tears run freely. Feeling the tiny hand holding on to her finger felt like he latched on to her heart. She felt love for him rise in her body. he had grabbed a hold of her motherheart.

"Do you want to cut the cord?" Rachel's voice made her pull her eyes of him. "Yeah, I'd love to!" Joey turned to look at her as she started to ease away from her position behind her. "I love you mummy!" She grinned at her. Charlie kissed her, "I love you too, mummy!" She giggled, they had to figure out the titling later.

Rachel reached her a pair of surgical scissors. "Now, cut between the two clamps!" She held the cord as Charlie prepared to cut.

* * *

"Hi, sorry I'm so late, has the baby come yet?" Aden came running through the doors, looking a little lost. Ruby rose from her seat next to Leah, walked over to him and put her arms around him. "Good to see you too!" She teased him, he smiled down at her and gave her a quick peck on the lips. "No the baby isn't here yet, but it shouldn't be long. At least that's what Rachel told us three hours ago, but I'm starting to question her ability to tell time!" Ruby frowned a little at the thought of Rachel's generous use of the term "not long."

"Hi Leah, good to see you!" Aden gave her a hug. "Good to see you too!" She smiled at him. She liked the development between Ruby and Aden. He had started out as Joey's best friend and from there he had gradually become a part of the family. Ruby and he had been friends for years before they started to develop romantic feelings for each other. Leah smiled to herself. This was good. Aden knew all of them, he loved all of them and he had always been there for them.

"Hi, has the baby come yet?" Martha's voice pulled her back to the present. Close behind her Hugo and Tony followed. "We just saw the text from Ruby, sorry we're so late!"

"No the baby hasn't come yet, but it shouldn't be too long though. I guess all you can do is join us and wait!" She smiled at them.

* * *

Joey had thought that her body would be torn in half as the baby forced its way out of her. Looking at him laying on her chest made all the pain seem insignificant. She turned her head looking into blue eyes filled with love and tears looking back at her. "I love you so much Charlie!" She kissed her, putting all her feelings into it. Tears ran down her cheeks, she was so happy. She lifted her free hand and placed it around Charlie's neck, not giving her a chance to pull away from the kiss. "I love you more than words can say Joey!" She whispered into her mouth.

Rachel continued with the clean up, she wanted to give them a few moments on their own. She saw one of the nurses heading over to take the baby, she quickly grabbed her by the arm and stopped her. "Give them a minute!" She whispered.

Charlie and Joey let their lips part, with foreheads leaning on each other they turned and looked at the baby. "Little Jordan!" Joey whispered. "Little Beanie!" Charlie giggled. "He looks like you!" She continued. In that moment he decided to open his eyes. "Wow, he has your eyes!" Joey whispered. Both of them stared into blue eyes looking back at them. They laughed, they cried, they kissed.

Rachel came over to them, "congratulations, he is beautiful!" Charlie got up on her feet, throwing her arms around her. "Rachel I can't begin to describe how grateful I am. I can never thank you enough for making this possible, for everything you have done for us. Without you, this would never happen. Thank you!" She hugged her before letting her go.

"You know I'm glad I can help you. I can't imagine any better parents than you two. This is one lucky kid, which I have to get cleaned up!" She smiled and lifted him from his resting place. "Why don't you go and bring the good news to those eagerly waiting?"

Charlie leaned over Joey, grinning at her and gave her a kiss. "I'll be right back!" Joey nodded and kissed her again.

Ruby jumped to her feet as soon as she saw Charlie coming through the double doors, she looked like shit. Ruby was filled with dread. Charlie's hair was a mess. Her shirt was drenched, she had bruises all over her arms and tears was streaming down her face.

Leah, Aden, Martha, Hugo and Tony joined Ruby. Finally Martha spoke, "What…? How's…?" was all she managed.

Charlie walked right into her sisters arms. Ruby was quick to catch her, holding her tight while Charlie sobbed. "It's… we…" She could hardly speak. Ruby was scared, "What happened?" She voice barely audible. Charlie took a few deep breaths, loosened her grip around Ruby, letting her arms rest on her shoulders instead. She looked into her eyes. "We got a little boy!" She bit her lower lip as a huge smile spread across her face. "It's a beautiful, perfect baby boy!"

They all broke out in laughter, they almost battled each other in order to be the first to give her a hug. "I'm so happy for you!" Leah was the winner. The others followed closely, greeting her as well. "Can we see him?" someone asked. Charlie grabbed a hold of Ruby's hand. "Guy's I want my sister to be the first one to see him, I'll come and get you when I have introduced him to his aunt."

* * *

Joey couldn't take her eyes of Jordan. He had been cleaned up, a tiny white cap covered his bald head and he was wrapped in a pale blue blanket. She lifted her head as the door opened. Ruby came walking over to her, closely followed by Charlie. "Oh God, he is beautiful, he is ugly but he is gorgeous! He looks like a prune!" Ruby giggled and cried at the same time, she let her hand cup his head. "Oh my God, he is so small!" She felt Charlie's arm around her waist, she leaned into her. "I'm so happy for you!" She managed to get out between sniffles.

"Hey, Charlie, you want to hold him?" Joey looked at Charlie who stood with her arm around Ruby, unable to take her eyes of the baby. She nodded. Ruby stepped back, giving her room. Charlie felt her heart race, he was so tiny, what if she dropped him? She couldn't resist. Carefully she placed a hand under his head, and the other cradling his body. She lifted him up in her arms. Holding him to his heart, she knew that he had taken it for the rest of her life.

He mesmerized her. She wanted to protect him, shelter him, keep him safe. It felt like her heart would burst from love. He opened her eyes and looked straight into hers. She was sold.

Ruby came up beside her, putting an arm around her, leaning on her. "Wow, you did a great job Sis!" "Hey, do you want to hold him?" Charlie looked a Joey to get approval, she smiled and nodded. She carefully transferred him into her sister's arms.

Ruby looked down at the little miracle in her arms, "Hey little guy, I'm your auntie!"

Joey looked at her son in Ruby's arms. She felt like she would explode from all the feelings inside. She finally had a real family. A family she had dreamt about having so many times. A few years ago she had thought it was a dream never coming true. Before Robbo she had believed that she would never have a family, she didn't have one growing up, or you couldn't call her family a family. Then when Robbo raped her, she was sure that she would never have a relationship with anyone ever again. Then meeting Charlie, all she wanted was a family with her.

She had her for a little while, and then Charlie freaked out, did the stupid mistake, and Joey ran away from her. During the three months apart she was sure she wouldn't have a family, because she wanted one with Charlie, but she was gone.

Now she had one. She grinned from ear to ear. Looking at Charlie, looking at the sisters closely together admiring the baby. Could anyone have it any better? She was married to the most beautiful woman in the world, she had a sister in law that would do anything for her, that she loved as a sister, and now she had a son. They had a son. She felt tears running down her face. She was so happy.

"Hey, are you OK?" Charlie had seen the tears and came over to her. "I'm so happy!" She smiled up at her. "I was thinking about us, you, our family. Before, I never thought that this would actually be some day, but now, that day is here!"

Charlie felt tears streaming down her face too. She had thought the exact same herself. She leaned down and kissed Joey. "I love you so much, I love little Beanie more than I thought possible. I love being his mum, I love you being his mum. Can anyone be as happy as I am?" Joey put her arms around her neck and kissed her, "can anyone be as happy as we are?"

* * *

"Hi! We want to see the latest addition to the Buckton household!" Aden came into the room, dragged in by Ruby. Leah and the rest followed right behind.

Charlie was sitting in the bed, Joey was leaning her back against her. They had the baby in their arms. "Wow, isn't that a pretty picture!" Martha giggled at them.

Leah was the first to walk over to them. "I … I don't know what to say!" She teared up, looking down at Jordan. "He is so beautiful, congratulations!" She gave Joey a hug, dried of her tears and laughed. "What's so funny?" Joey looked at her, amused by Leah's reactions. "I just thought about what you told me in the plane when we went to Norway. Joey started to laugh to. "Well, if I'm like a mother to you, that means I'm a grandmother now!"


	25. Chapter 25

**Again, thank you for your kind reviews!**

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"Oh my gosh!" Isn't he the cutest thing you have ever seen?" Irene leaned over Charlie who held Jordan in her arms. "How old is he now?

"He's nine weeks, and growing like a beanstalk!" Joey answered, smiling up at her. They had taken the trip to the Diner to get lunch. They had figured it was about time to meet the rest of the world, not only their closest friends.

When people had realized that Joey was pregnant, it had created some controversy. They had strangers approach them and scolding them for having a baby. There had even been articles about it in the newspaper, causing a debate on whether gay people should be allowed to have kids or not.

It had been a stressful time, but eventually it had blown over. They were a little apprehensive of going out in public with the baby, but finally agreed that they couldn't hide forever. They had to face the world someday, and this day was as good as any.

Joey and Charlie had put their chairs close together, Jordan had woken up, and lay comfortably nuzzled in Charlie's arms. Joey had her arm around her waist, chin resting on her shoulder. She turned her face a little and kissed her on the cheek.

"I'm so happy for you both, I can see how happy you are together. Don't bother with people throwing up a fuzz about you, they don't know what they're talking about." Irene let her hand touch his head."Aw, he is just a cutie, makes me want to take him home!" She gave him a final pet before she walked back to the counter.

Charlie and Joey looked at each other and giggled. They were happy, more than happy. Charlie leaned in and kissed her, "In case you wondered, since I haven't told you for… let me see… five minutes, I love you Joey Buckton!" Joey placed a hand on her neck, pulling her closer, "I love you too Mrs. Buckton, in case you wonder, since it's…let me see… it has been three minutes since last time I told you!" They giggled, kissing again.

"Ehm," They were drawn away from each other by Irene clearing her throat, "Sorry to disturb, but here's your lunch," She smiled at them, like so many others she was amused by the affection the couple showed for each other.

Charlie rose and put a sleeping Jordan back in his baby buggy. "I think Beanie is sleepy after his lunch, I guess it's time for us to have ours!" She leaned over Joey and gave her a kiss before she sat down. "I love watching you feed him!" She whispered in her ear. Joey giggled, "I can think of someone else touching me, for other reasons!" She lifted her eyebrow and gave her a cheeky grin. The tone in her voice made Charlie blush, "Maybe we should skip lunch and go home?" Joey teased her. "I think I'm hungry for something else than food!" She kissed her again.

"Oh my goodness gracious, can't you two stop that?" Colleens annoyed voice made them pull apart. "You know you are in a public place, and you shouldn't behave like… like horny teenagers!" She slam two cups of coffee down on the table in front of them, shook her head and left.

They put their foreheads together and giggled. "Maybe Colleen is right, we should eat our lunch, then we can go home and go to bed, not getting up for the rest of the day!" Joey whispered. "At least until Beanie here calls for attention!" Charlie gave her a short kiss before turning her attention to the food.

"Girls so good to see you, tell you what, lunch is on the house today, it's really good to see you!" Leah came up and put her hands on their shoulders. "And Beanie, is he sleeping?" She went over to the buggy, carefully pulling the covers back a little to have a look. "Aw, he is so cute!" She looked back at them, "He really looks like you Joey!"

"Yeah we know, but he has Charlie's eyes though, I think that's amazing, and he has dimples, they are so cute!" Joey smiled at her. Leah had been a great support for them, as always. She had shared her experience as a mother with them. The first week she had cooked for them, she had shown them little tricks that just made every day life easier. Having a baby had been a big adjustment, but they both loved it, and little hints from Leah had helped a lot

"Maybe we should have a little party, you know, gather all our friends, just to celebrate life?" Leah suggested as she sat down on the other side of the table. "I think it would be so great to get together, I can cook, or maybe we could have it here…"

"I think that would be a great!" They answered simultaneously. Leah laughed, "I'll take care of the details, and all you have to do is show, OK?" They nodded. "We'll find a date later. Oh this is going to be exiting!" Leah's wheels was already turning to find out what to serve, who to invite and every other minute detail she was going to pay attention.

"Leah!" Colleen called for her,"The food isn't going to make itself!" Leah sighed and came back to reality, "As I said, all you have to do is show!" She excused herself and left. They looked at each other again, giggling. Leah loved to plan parties, and they could tell this would be a good one. "I look forward to go to a party with you again!" Joey gave Charlie a kiss. "Do you think we can get a baby sitter for an hour or two?" Charlie nodded and smiled, it would be great.

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"So this is where you play happy family?" They both were startled by the husky voice. They looked up and saw a tall, slightly boxy, blond woman standing glaring at them. Joey looked at her, there was something familiar about her. She couldn't quite place her, but she knew she had seen her before.

"Ehh… excuse me, I think I know you, but I can't place you… Who are you?" She asked, feeling a little apprehensive about her. The woman turned to the buggy without acknowledging the question. "So this is your little kid, "she let a finger run over the covers. Something about her movement made Joey's stomach churn. "Please, who are you?" She tried to get an answer out of her.

Charlie watched Joey growing more and more anxious. She didn't recognize the woman either, but there was something familiar with her. She tried to get into her 'cop-mode'. She studied her intently, there was something about her face that reminded her of someone. She search her brain for a matching face.

She felt cold fear fill her up. One face filled her mind. Take away the beard, give him a little longer hair, make his face a little smaller… it had to be Robbo's sister.

"You… you are Robbo's sister, aren't you!" She rose from her seat. Joey stared at her, then back on the woman. She recognized her "Lara… What are you doing here? She rose from her seat too.

"So, it took you that long to remember me?" She smirked at her, she looked just like Robbo, Joey was paralyzed. She stepped close to Joey, grabbed a hold of her hair and kissed her.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Charlie closed the gap between them, pulling the other woman away from Joey. Lara was bigger than Charlie was, and the jerk Charlie gave her didn't seem to affect her at all. "I think you should stay out of this!" Her voice was ice cold. Something in it made Charlie take half a step back.

"I have some business to take care of with your girlfriend!" She reached behind her back, pulled out a small gun she hid in her hand. She showed it to Charlie. "You see, this slut here has ruined my whole life. She hit on me, thinking I was gay, and I bet she has dreamt of me many times since then. That kiss was just to show her what she can't get."

Charlie looked at the woman, shocked. Her mined raced to try to find a way out of this. She looked at Joey, her face was filled with fear, she could see that images of past incidents rushed through her head. Charlie looked t the gun barely visible in the woman's hand. She looked at her face, she seemed out of control. She glanced around the room, the other guests had stopped what they were doing and stared at the scene playing out in front of them.

She had to do something to get them out of this. She glanced over to the counter, Irene and Colleen was intently studying them, Irene had a hand on Colleen's arm, holding her back from doing anything stupid. Charlie saw that Leah wasn't there, she was still in the kitchen. If she could just tell Leah to stay in there and call the police, then maybe she could stall Lara long enough for the police to get there.

"Lara, I know you are Robbo's sister, but it wasn't Joey's fault that he ended up in jail. She didn't do anything wrong." Charlie spoke loud, hoping that Leah noticed. "It's not a good idea to do anything stupid, you'll just make things worse!" _Leah call the police!_ She wished she was telepathic.

"Yes, I am Robbo's sister, and you have taken him away. You have destroyed my family. I know he wasn't the best kid on the block, but he was my brother, and I loved him. It was always just me and him. And you took him away!" She spat at Charlie. "And now he's dead, and it's your fault!"

Charlie was shocked, she wasn't sure she had heard right. "What do you mean, dead?" She asked.

"Yeah, dead! He was killed in jail this morning. He had made enemies, and this morning they ganged up on him and killed him… If it hadn't been for you, putting your nose into other peoples business, he would still be alive! You took away the person I loved most, I will take away the person you love most!"Lara tightened her hold of Joey's hair, pulling her head back, causing a little whimper from Joey.

"Look, Lara. Robbo broke the law, I'm a police officer. I did my job. I'm sorry he's dead, but he dug his own grave." Charlie tried to reason with her, keep her talking to give the police a chance to get there. _Please Leah, tell me you have called!_

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Leah was standing in the kitchen making salad when she heard Charlie's voice. She turned to walk out of the kitchen when she heard Charlie speaking. "…Robbo's sister…do anything stupid…" She froze. If Robbo's sister was anything like her brother, she could be unpredictable. She stepped as far into the kitchen she could, pulling up her phone and called the police.

---

Joey was in shock, seeing Lara brought back memories of Robbo. She tried to get away from her, but she couldn't move a muscle. She couldn't hear, she couldn't see. It was like all of her senses shut down. She was back on the boat, back on the hotel. She tried to find something to hold on to but she couldn't

She felt her hair being pulled back, it hurt, she let out a whimper. The pain made her able to focus, Jordan needed her, Charlie needed her. She had to do something. "Lara, I'm sorry I hit on you back then, I kind of thought you was…" Lara turned her attention from Charlie to Joey, "In your dreams!" she snarled. "It was only after you I started to look at girls, you destroyed everything for me. I wasn't gay before you, but you poisoned me."

Joey couldn't believe how unreasonable she was. "Lara, you were gay long before we met, you know that. I didn't 'turn' you, I think you liked me." She tried to talk sense with her. "Yeah, maybe I did like you, but that doesn't change the fact that you ruined my life," She tightened her grip around her hair, it felt like she was about to pull it all off.

"I think we need to get out of here, I don't want an audience, except maybe from your girlfriend here, she disserves to see what I'm going to do with you!" Lara pushed the gun to her ribs, Joey felt it and understood what it was.

She started to plead with her" Lara, please, Charlie has nothing to do with this, you want me, you have me!" Tears was running down her face. Jordan needed one of them, she couldn't risk Charlie getting harmed too.

The rest of the guests started to realize that this was serious. They stated to whimper and cry from fear. That didn't exactly help the situation. Charlie was scared, the commotion in the Diner could be enough to push Lara over the edge. As she feared, Lara lost her temper. She pointed the gun at the guests. "I'm not here to do anything to you, but if you don't shut up, I'll be happy to shoot you!" She screamed.

She put the gun to Joey's head, dragging her backwards to the door, Charlie followed her step by step. Lara stared intently at her, smirking. Charlie was struck by the resemblance with Robbo, no doubt they where siblings.

Lara dragged Joey out the door, starting to head over to her car. Charlie still followed her. She noticed a movement behind Lara, the police had come. She sighed with relief on the inside, but she was careful not to give any expressions on the outside. She had to make Lara stop to give the police a chance to get her, and she wanted to let them now she had a gun. "Lara, why don't we talk a little, put down your gun, it's only us here." She looked over Lara's shoulder, seeing Watson giving her a little nod, she had understood.

"Are you crazy, I have this little slut exactly where I want her, she is going to pay, and so are you!" Charlie saw the crazy look in her eyes, this lady had lost control.

Watson studied the situation in front of her, she could see the gun in the woman's hand, held point blank to Joey's head. She sneaked in behind her, hoping they could take her by surprise, she motioned to her colleagues to get closer.

Joey was scared, she felt the gun pressing on her temple, she was scared for Jordan, for Charlie. She had no idea what to do. She looked at Charlie who was stealing quick glances over her shoulder. Charlie caught her eyes and gave her a tiny nod.

"Let her go, or we have to shoot!" Watsons voice came from right behind her, Joey wanted to turn to look. Lara laughed, "Can't you see, I have a gun mashed into the head of this bitch?" She scorned Watson.

"Let her go I said!" Watson's voice was calm but stern. Joey felt Lara lose her grip around her hair. She didn't think, she just acted. She threw her head back, hitting the back of it in Lara's face and plunged to the ground. She heard a shot fired.


	26. Chapter 26

**Thank you for all your kind reviews. this chapter is a littel short, but I didn't want to keep you haning for too long:) I'll redeem myself later:)**

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Joey lay on the ground, waiting to feel the bullet penetrate her body, she couldn't feel a thing. Maybe she was shot, and now she was dead? She tried to feel for anything that hurt. She felt fine, except the back of her head.

Arms grabbed a hold of her, rolling her over on her back. She opened her eyes and looked into Charlie's blue eyes staring back at her. "Are you OK? Are you hurt?" Joey sat up and threw her arms around her. She started to cry. "Oh my God, I was so scared, are you OK, what about Beanie?" She sobbed on her shoulder.

"I'm OK, Beanie is inside, he's fine!" Charlie let her tears run too. She had been so scared, and trying to control the situation had been hard. She let all the pressure out. "I was so scared, I didn't know what that woman could do…"

"Were is she, what happened? I heard a shot…" Joey lifted her head and looked around. She saw Watson leaning over a figure laying on the grown. "George shot her, she cocked her gun to shoot you, George was faster." Charlie looked the same way. "Let's get inside and get Jordan!" She rose and helped Joey to her feet. Arms around each other they walked back into the Diner.

Leah was hovering over the baby buggy, making sure that Jordan was OK. She rose as the two of them came in. She rushed over and threw her arms around both of them. "Thank goodness you are OK, I didn't want to go outside, I thought I better keep an eye on Beanie. What happened?"

Charlie gave her a short recap of what had happened as Joey made her way over to Jordan. She picked him up and held him to her chest. Tears was streaming, she was so reviled that she could hold him again. She felt Charlie embrace her from behind, she turned in her arms, put her head on her shoulder, Jordan between them. They just stood there, embraced, reviled that they still had each other.

"Eh… excuse me, "Watsons voice drew them apart. They turned to face her." I need to get your statements, but we have to take a little talk first, and then we can do it formally later." She gestured over to a table.

"Lara said something about Robbo being dead?" Charlie started talking after Leah had brought them coffee. "What?" Joey interrupted her. "What do you mean dead, he's in jail, not dead!"

Watson placed her hand on top of Joey's. "We got the message just before Leah called us. Robbo was killed this morning. Apparently he had made enemies, something about rivalry, they are still investigating it. We don't know much." Joey felt a wave of relief rush through her body. Robbo was gone. The wave of relief was closely followed with guilt. She didn't really want Robbo dead, he was in jail, he had got his sentence for what he did. She couldn't help it, she was relieved.

Charlie pulled her closer. She had seen the emotions in Joey's face. She hugged her, "it's OK to be relieved, I am too. We will never see him again, he will never hurt us again." She whispered into her ear.

Watson cleared her throat the get their attention. "I'm sorry to say that Lara is dead too… I had to shoot her… I have never killed anyone before." She was clearly upset, a tear found its way down her cheek. Charlie let Joey go, and put her arms around Watson instead. "George, you were only doing your job, you did the right thing, you know that!" Watson nodded, she pulled herself together, and dried of her tears. "Apparently Lara lost it when she learned about Robbo's death. She was unstable, they've had episodes with her before, in Yabbie creek. She was like a ticking time bomb, and this made her explode."

Charlie nodded, she had enough experience with unstable people before she came to Summer Bay. She knew how little it took to push them over the edge.

"Joey, what's the history here?" Watson faced her. Joey looked at them, she didn't have any urge to spill past disasters. She sighed, "Well, Robbo was a friend of Brett's, they grew up together, they were best mates. Brett even believed Robbo over me when he raped me on the boat…" She rubbed her hands over her face.

Charlie could see the same girl she had seen back then, when she had taken her down to the seaside to talk. Joey had been ashamed, worried and scared of her reaction. All Charlie wanted back then was to hold her and comfort her, she hadn't, she had kept her distance. Not this time, she pulled her chair next to Joey's put her arm around her shoulders and held her.

Joey leaned into Charlie, it felt safe and reassuring to have her close, as always she found strength and comfort in her arms. "Lara was his sister. She was older than me, but she used to hang with Robbo, so when he came over, she would too, hanging out with me." She paused.

"When I was sixteen, she kind of started to give me attention, you know, flirting with me. I was so insecure, I knew I was gay, and getting attention was exiting. Not that I really liked her, she was just someone… I didn't have any friends in school, and it was nice to have someone liking me. So one day I kissed her, she kissed me back, we were kind of going for it when Robbo walked in on us. She blamed it all on me, that I had assaulted her and made her kiss me." Joey giggled a little, "Come on, she was almost twice my size, it's not like I could make her do anything."

"Robbo bashed me that day, I thought he had broken my jaw. When Brett found out what happened, he bashed me too. He always believed Robbo's word over mine. He always did. "New tears streamed down her face. Charlie pulled her even closer, letting her cry on her shoulder. Joey had never told her this, well she knew about Lara, but not about what really happened. Lara had just been one of those funny stories Joey had told her about her rocky road out of the closet.

Charlie had tears streaming down her own face. She wished she knew Joey when she was sixteen, that they had met and fallen in love. She started to giggle. "Do you find that funny?" Joey lifted her head, not knowing how to interpret Charlie's giggle.

Charlie was quick to explain herself:"No no no, not at all! I want to hunt down your brother and bash him for bashing you. I just thought... I wish I knew you when you were sixteen, but it would probably be a bad thing, because I would have been twenty two, and with the way we behave, it would have been very inappropriate…"

Joey giggled too, and then she sighed, "I would have loved to meet you back then. I would probably run away with you, and lied and told you I was eighteen!" She gave her a kiss."I have you now, that's all that matters!"


	27. Chapter 27

**As always, Thank you for all the great reviews:) Enjoy! (I don't bother giving mushy alerts any longer...:)  
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It was early in the morning, Joey sat in bed nursing Jordan, Charlie had her arm around her shoulder, looking down at him. She let her hand caress his head, enjoying the feeling of the dark fuzz that had started to appear. He was so soft and warm. Joey turned her head and found her lips. "I'm so happy Charlie, It's kind of strange. I feel like it should be illegal or something to be this happy." She smiled. She was happy. Robbo was gone, so was his sister. It felt like nothing could touch them anymore.

A gentle knock on the door disturbed them. "Hi, can I come in?" Ruby stood outside the door, waiting for an answer. "Sure come on!"Joey replied. Ruby opened the door and peaked in, she smiled at the sight of Jordan in Joey's arm. "So I guess someone is having breakfast! Doesn't he know that it's way to early to think about food?" Ruby giggled and sat on the bed with them.

Charlie looked at her sister. She had really grown into a beautiful young lady. She studied her, realizing that it was a long time since she had really looked at her. Ruby was twenty, turning twenty one in a couple of months. She was slender, not very tall, but she had a beautiful body that made her stand out. Her hair was still a curly mess, but the pigtails were gone. She had started uni in the city, studying pedagogy. She lived in the city during the week and home with them in the weekends.

"Do you look forward till to night?" Charlie asked her. "Yeah, it'll be great. Aden is taking me." She blushed and giggled. She and Aden had been a couple for six months. "Have you got a baby sitter for Beanie tonight?" Ruby let her hand stroke his head. "Yeah, we got Stella to be here for two, three hours, and VJ will be here as well." Joey answered, she couldn't hide her excitement. She really looked forward to Leah's party.

Ruby giggled at the expression on Joey's face, then she turned serious. "Look, I know you guys probably has talked about this till it oozed out your ears, but I have to say…" She glanced at them. "I'm really sorry for what Robbo's sister did. You shouldn't have to go through that Joey… And I feel like a terrible person for saying this, but…" She studied the sheets intently. Charlie leaned forward, put her hand under her chin and lifted her head. "What do you feel so terrible for?"

"Well, when you told me that Robbo was dead… I was relieved, I know I shouldn't be, it's not up to us to say who should live and who should die… but hearing it, I knew that he would never hurt you again. I always had a little nagging 'what if' voice in the back of my head. What if he got out…? What if he escaped… ?What if somebody messed up the paperwork again? I was scared, I don't want to lose you Joey, and I didn't want him to hurt you. Knowing that he can't, knowing that his sister can't… well I'm relieved. It's like I finally has peace." She sighed, looking at them.

Charlie pulled her in for a hug, "I know, we feel the same way. I have felt guilty, because so many times I wanted to kill him myself, but you know, that was in the heat of the moment. I was satisfied with the punishment the system gave him. We were happy with him in jail. But you're right, knowing that he is dead, it's like a burden lifted. You're not the only one with that 'what if' running in the back of your head."

Joey lifted Jordan to her shoulder to burp him. She looked at Ruby while she gently petted him on his back. She loved Ruby, she knew that the assault on her nearly two years ago had taken her toll on her. It was a miracle that she had made it through senior year, but hard work on Ruby's side had made her pass with flying colors.

Jordan burped, making them all smile. "Do you want to hold him?" Joey motioned to Ruby. "Yeah, of course, come here little Beanie!" She reached over and cradled him. "Poor kid, when his eighty, he'll still be called Beanie!" She laughed.

Joey snuggled up with Charlie, they giggled too. The name had really stuck. They tried to call him Jordan, but most of the time it was just Beanie.

"You know Rubs, it's so good to have you here. I really hope you'll come back to Summer Bay when you have finished school. Beanie needs his aunt!" Joey smiled at her, she did want her to stay. Ruby was the only family they had left. They had Morag of course, she was still a part of their family, seeing she had been married to Charlie's father. Charlie had told her she didn't like her in the beginning, but over time she had become fond of her.

They considered Leah and VJ family and Aden too. He had demanded to be uncle, and they had happily obliged, but Ruby was their only blood family.

"Like there would be any other place worth living!" Ruby winked at her."Seriously, I want to stay with my family. I love you guys!" she concentrated on the bundle in her arms, "And Beanie have to have an aunt to spoil him rotten!"

"Ruby, you have been really great, helped us a lot, not only with Beanie, but through the years." Joey let her hand rest on her arm. "You have done so much for me. From the very beginning, I know it was difficult for you, but you supported us. I really liked you from the first time I met you, and you have become my sister. You shouldn't feel bad for being relieved, I'm too. This has really closed the book on Robbo." She smiled at her," After the incident with Lara… she reminded me so much of Robbo, she scared us whittles… I'm sorry she is dead, but I'm relieved too, there's no one left to harm us."

Ruby leaned over, careful with Jordan in her arms, and gave her a hug. Charlie hugged her from the other side. For a long time they sat cheek to cheek, Ruby in the middle, hands around each other. They were a family, and no one could take that away from them. A sniffle broke the silence, another one followed, they started to giggle, and pulled away from each other. They were happy. They were safe and sound, they had each other.

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Charlie was standing in the shower, enjoying the feeling of warm water rushing down her body. Her thoughts wandered to the evening. It would be great to go out with Joey again. Last time was Aden's twenty fifth, and that was more than six months ago. Having Stella babysitting would be nice too. Leah had used her for years, and had recommended her to them. They had met her, she was a nice lady, and she was unusually good with kids. It was good to know that Jordan would be in such capable hands, it was the first time they would be away from him.

She smiled to herself, it would be good with some alone time with Joey, maybe they could sneak away a little early, maybe they could repeat their first time together… She felt heat rise in her as her thoughts wandered to that first night in the car.

She had been so scared, and at the same time so happy. It had been such a relief finally admitting her feelings to Joey. They had kissed, she still remembered the first touch of their lips. She had been so overwhelmed by the sensation. She was so soft, and tasted incredibly good. They had made love in the car that night, they had spent hours exploring, discovering each other. She had been so scared, but unable to stop. Joey had the patient of an angel. Charlie admired her ability to control herself. She had been turned on as she never had before, but fright held her back. Joey was turned on just as much, but she restrained herself, holding back, letting Charlie dictate the pace. It was Joey in a nutshell, always considerate of her feelings, always wanting what was best for her. She smiled, she figured that she would find Joey when she got out.

A cold draft of air startled her. She spun around just to see Joey entering the bathroom. "Ruby has Beanie, I thought you might need some help washing you back… hard place to reach!" She gave her a foxy smile. "You just read my mind, I was thinking of you!" Charlie stepped out of the shower, "Well, you have to get in with me if you want to wash my back, so I think we have to get rid of this!" She pulled the waist band of Joeys robe, it fell to the ground.

"You are so beautiful, I can't believe that you almost have your figure back!" She let her hands rest on her waist. Playfully she let them wander up her chest, "Well, not everything is back to normal!" She giggled as her hands reached their wanted destination.

Joey laughed and kissed her. Their tongues playing, sending jolts of fire through their bodies. Joey pulled back. "Well, I don't get you washed like this, am I?" She pushed her into the shower. Charlie laughed and pulled her in with her.

Joey stood behind her, took the sponge and started to soap her in. She let her mouth play with the skin on her neck, behind her ear, nibbling at the shoulder. Every touch caused Charlie to let out little sounds of pleasure. Charlie turned around, possessing her mouth, letting her hands caress Joey's body. Joey laughed and fell to her knees, showering kisses down her body on the way down. She let her hand find the centre of her pleasure. She looked up into her face and smiled to her as her body jerked, before letting her mouth attend more serious business than smiling.

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"Charlie, can you give me a hand?" Joey called out. Charlie came smiling through the bedroom door. "At your service, Dear!" She froze, "Are you going to wear that tonight?" She stared at the dress in Joey's hand. "You know that will render me useless for the evening, how am I supposed to be able to think about anything but you if you wear that?" Joey gave her a cheeky grin, "Why do you think I want to wear it?" She giggled. "I don't know if I can fit into it, it was so tight when I bought it, and I'm not down to my normal size yet, specially, you know…" She glanced down on her chest.

Charlie laughed and went over to her. "You are not planning on going commando? If you are, I'm not helping you get into it, it would just be a waste of time!" She gave her a cheeky grin back. "No way, never in a million years would I go commando in Summer Bay! I actually have been shopping…" She opened a drawer and searched a little.

She smiled. "It's not much, but at least it makes me feel like I'm wearing something." She giggled as she lifted her hand. A minute, skin toned thong hanged from her finger. Charlie grabbed it. "What do you do whit these, floss?" She giggled, "You have never used a thong in your life, and you couldn't find any smaller?"

Joey turned tomato red, giggling. "I thought I do my best to keep your attention, and I figured that would do the job!" She grabbed the thong from her hand and gave her a kiss.

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Aden had decided to impress Ruby, he had bought himself a suit, even a tie. He wasn't a dress type of guy, but he wanted to impress Ruby. He smiled at the thought of her. He had fallen in love with her. Spending time with her when Charlie had been shot had opened his eyes for her. They had been friends for a long time, but seeing her during that period of time had caused him to fall for her. He was really in love, it felt like she was the one. He loved everything about her, and he really appreciated the way she cared about her family.

He walked up the stairs, adjusting the tie and knocked.

"I'll get it, it's probably Aden!" Ruby shouted over her shoulder as she rushed to get the door. She opened and froze as she saw Aden. He looked so good. "Wow!" Was all she was able to say. She stared at him, her eyes wandering up and down his body. "You… you should wear a dress all the time…" He did look good. The silk shirt followed the muscles in his arms and torso, reveling his fit body.

Aden looked at the revelation that had opened the door. He couldn't get a single word out. Ruby had borrowed Joey's dress from Hugo and Martha's wedding. It suited her perfectly, the color, the cut, the fabric, it looked like it was made for her. "It's Joey's ,she let me borrow it, I wanted to look good for you!" She fiddled with her hands, nervously waiting for him to say something.

"Uh… eh…Wow…I mean…Wow" Was all he was able to say. Ruby giggled and turned around to show him the back. "Ehh… Ruby…" He pulled her in and kissed her, letting his hand caress her back.

"Hey, stop that you two!" A laughing voice pulled him away from Ruby. He looked up to see Charlie, his jaw dropped, Joey came up beside her, he lost absolutely all control of his face. Seeing the three women standing in front of him made his mind go into over drive.

Charlie and Joey were wearing the dresses from their wedding. No one in the Bay, except Ruby and Leah had seen them, and they had figured that it would be nice to use them again. Joey had been able to squeeze into hers, but just barely.

Ruby looked at Aden, giggling at his expression, she placed her hand under his jaw and lifted it. "Hey, it's my sister and her wife you're looking at!" She wasn't surprised by his reaction, she had had been stunned herself when they had emerged from the bedroom.

He regained his composure, "I…I'm sorry girls, I'm not used to seeing you like this… I mean Joey, you clean up really well…and Charlie… Wow, just wow." He turned to Ruby, "But you are the most beautiful, and you're mine!" He smiled and kissed her.

"I don't know if it's safe to take you to the Diner though, I think the guys will have problem focusing, seeing you all there. They brains will probably fry, especially if you two carry on as your usual self." He laughed at the thought.

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"Ruby, "Aden turned to face her as he parked outside the Diner. He had left with her, Charlie and Joey followed in their own car. "Ruby I just want to tell you…" He put a hand on her cheek, looking into her eyes. "I just want to tell you that I love you, and I want to be with you for the rest of my life. I just want you to know, that when you've finished uni, I'll be waiting for you. I want a happy ever after with you." He leaned in and kissed her.

"I love you too, Aden. I was with Xavier for a long time, but he never made me feel the way I do when I'm with you. I want a happy ever after with you too, but I have to finish uni first. I want to use my life helping others, and I need my education in order to do that." She smiled, "But when I'm done, I'll be ready for you!" She cupped his face in her hands and kissed him.

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"Wow, Ruby, you look fantastic!" Leah greeted them as they entered the Diner. "Joey's dress looks like it was made for you!" Ruby gave her a hug, "I know, I think I have to persuade her to give it to me!" She giggled. She enjoyed the attention, she knew that when her sister and Joey came she would be forgotten, but not by Aden, she grabbed a tighter hold of his hand.

They made their way around, greeting everybody. It was friends of them all. She saw the back of someone familiar, "Annie! What are you doing here? I thought you were in Melbourne!" She threw her arms around her. They was best friends from school. Annie returned the hug, "Wow, you look like a million dollars, and the dress, where did you get that from?" She pushed Ruby back to have a look at her, she giggled and pulled her in for another. "So good to see you Rubs!"

A finger poked her shoulder, "I want a hug too, Ruby!" She turned around to the familiar voice, "Jai! You're here too! This is going to be the best night ever!" She hugged both of them.

"Wow!" Ruby looked up at Jai, he had forgotten all about her, staring at the entrance. Ruby punched him in the chest, knowing what he was looking at. The room that had been filled with chattering, turned completely silent. Ruby giggled, she felt sorry for the guys. She found Aden's hand, he smiled down at her and put an arm around her shoulder, "You know you're the only girl for me!" He whispered in her ear.

She looked at the two that had caused the silence. She had to admit, they were hot. She had seen them before in the dresses, but the reaction from the crowd made her take a second look. They were incredible beautiful. Charlie looked like she was walking on air. The dress emphasized every curve, and the aura of happiness and peace she had with her made her look even more beautiful. She was tall, slender and carried herself with dignity.

Joey looked amazing, her increased bust line draw the attention to that part of her body. Even Ruby had problems looking away, she felt slightly embarrassed. To her defense, Joey was gorgeous. The dress showed of all her curves. The two of them together was mind blowing. The happiness shining from both of them made it seem like they were taken from a fairytail. It shouldn't be possible to have two such beautiful women in one place.

She glanced around the place, all the guys was staring, the women too. She giggled, put her elbow in Aden's side, and pointed out the expressions on the faces around them.

"OK, maybe this was a bad idea," Joey stepped closer to Charlie, all the eyes was on them. Charlie giggled, "It's not our fault that they can't keep their eyes to them self! I'm here to have a wonderful time with you!" She put her arm around her. She turned to her, with a cheeky grin she leaned in to her ear, "Shall we really give them something to look at?" Joey pulled back a little, lifting one of her eyebrows. "You know the guys will have a heart attack, poor colleen too!" She giggled, closed the small gap between them and kissed her, deep and passionate.

The sound of a bottle breaking on the floor drew them apart, they looked at each other and giggled. "You are so mean!" Ruby came over to them, "haven't you seen the poor guys here, their eyes are about to fall out!" She tried to restrain her laughter. Joey put up a serious face, "I just innocently kissed my wife!" "Innocently!" Ruby snorted, "You did it so on purpose!" Charlie put up hers most innocent face too, "I don't understand where you get such ideas from Ruby, you know me, would I ever do something like that?"

"Exactly, I know you, and you would so do that!" She couldn't hold back any longer, she laughed. Joey and Charlie looked at each other, bursting out laughing. Leah came over to them, laughing too, she had seen the whole thing. "You are so mean girls!" She gave them all a hug.

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Joey looked at the woman sitting next to her. They were enjoying the company. Everyone they knew was there. The food was excellent. Leah had done the cooking with help from Irene and Colleen, who now had joined the party.

Joey let her hand find Charlie's. She thought about the first time they had gone to the Diner, this time it was so different. Back then, Charlie had been scared that anyone would see them holding hands, now she kissed her right in front of everybody's eyes, she giggled.

Charlie turned to her, "What's so funny`?" "I just thought about us, how happy I'm with you, how scared you were the first time we came here as a couple. You are not scared now!" She smiled and kissed her cheek. "Oh, I'm plenty scared, scared that I won't be able to control myself, and really give everyone here something to look at!" She whispered into her ear. Joey blushed, "Maybe we could leave a little early, take advantage of having a babysitter…?"

Joey let her hand find its way to Charlie's thigh under the table. She let it creep to the inside, causing her to start coughing. Everybody turned to look. "I'm OK, just choked on…" Charlie tried to explain, red as a tomato. She turned and frowned at Joey, who put up a fake bewildered look, "What, I didn't do anything!" She put on her most innocent smile. Charlie gave her a cheeky grin, "well at least I'm wearing a long dress…" She let her hand take revenge.

Joey choked as she felt Charlie's and on her bare thigh, it slowly made its way up the inside. She gasped, and everybody turned to look at her. She masked the gasp in a cough "Ah… the food… likes to find its own way…" She stammered. "Stop it!" She whispered to Charlie. "Make me!" She whispered back.

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"You are so bad!" Joey whispered into Charlie's ear. They were dancing, someone had put on some music after the dinner, and now several couples were out on the floor. "Do you know how hard it was to pretend nothing was going on, how hard it was to eat, and that was a superb meal!" She smiled and kissed her on the ear.

"You could have stopped me!" Charlie whispered back. "As if! Feeling you touch my thigh beats any meal any time. It's just one problem…"Joey pulled back a little, smiling at her. "What?" Charlie smiled back. "I want you so bad right now, I could make love to you right here, and that would be a bad thing!" Joey stared at her, looking into eyes dark from desire, just as her own. "Let's get out of here!"

They hurried to excuse them self, thanking everybody for a lovely evening, but they had to get back to Jordan. They took the time to give Leah a warm hug, and profusely thanking her for all the trouble she had gone trough to make the night possible.

"Hey, you don't have to go for another hour, Stella…"Ruby was interrupted by her sister hushing her. A light turned on, she knew why they were so eager to go, she giggled. "OK, enjoy yourself, see you tomorrow!" She gave them a kiss on the cheek and went over to Aden. "Why are they leaving so early?" He asked Ruby, she blushed, "You don't want to know!"

* * *

Charlie drove them down to the beach were they had been so many years ago. "I remember this place!" Joey smiled. "It was our first time together, the night you told me you loved me!" She turned in her seat and faced her. "I'm in love with you!" She lifted her hand and placed it on her cheek, Charlie leaned into it, she smiled "I'm in love with you too!" Joey grinned, "So… what are we going to do about it…? Do you want to be with me?" Charlie grabbed a hold of her hand resting in Joey's lap. "Yes I want to be with you!" She grinned as she closed the gap between them and kissed her.

Charlie put her hand on Joey's thigh, pushing the dress up, finding her way higher than she had done during dinner. She kissed her, they played with each other, tongues living their own life, tasting, caressing, teasing.

"Come over here!" Joey pulled her over to her seat. "Your dress is in the way, you should have put on a short one, like me. This is impossible!" She groaned.

"I guess I have to take it off then! Help me, pull down the zipper!" Joey wasn't slow to follow instructions, it didn't take long before the dress had changed location to the back seat.

"Mmm, much better!" Joey stared into the face of the woman straddling her. She let her hands enjoy her curves. "I remember our first time… I was so nervous, I wanted it to be perfect for you. I wanted to show you all the love I had for you, I wanted you to feel the same way I felt. She let her hands follow the outline of the bra to her back, she opened it and pulled it off.

"I know, "Charlie smiled, gasping for air as Joey's hands put her on fire. "I was scared to death, I wanted you so much, but I didn't know what I was doing. Touching you for the first time… A guy had never made me feel like that. Your hands on me… your lips, you touched me deeper than I thought possible. You touched me deep inside, a place I didn't know I had before you." Charlie eased Joey's dress down, pushed her hand around her to open the strapless bra. She leaned down and kissed the skin she revealed. "I don't understand how you could have so much self-control then. I know how I make you feel, I know how you make me feel. I don't think I would be able to control myself. "

"I love you Charlie, I loved you then. That's way. I wanted you so bad, but I wanted even more to make it perfect for you!" "Thank God I don't have to do that now, I'm so hot!" Joey let her hands run up the inside of Charlie's thighs, finding a warm, moist place waiting for her.

She gave a little squeal as Charlie lowered the back of the seat. She let her hand wander to the exact same place on Joey, causing her body to jerk at the touch. They moved together as one, driving each other higher and deeper until they were lost in endless space.


	28. Chapter 28

**I'm so glad that you all like this story, I hope I can keep the spark in it:) Thank you far all your great reviews, hope you'll enjoy this!**

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Charlie embraced Joey tightly from behind. Joey was intently paying attention to the pot on the stove. At the feel of arms around her, she giggled, "I'm cooking, give me some space!"

"Oh…" Charlie pulled away and took a step back. "Not that much space, silly!" Joey turned with a big grin, pulled her in and kissed her. Charlie smiled and kissed her back. She let her hands wander to her back, pulling her closer. Joey let hers entwine in Charlie's hair. Out of breath, she pulled back. "We can't do this now, it wouldn't look good if Rachel and Tony, Leah and Robert came over and found us naked on the kitchen table. I don't think they except to be served that!" She laughed.

Charlie leaned her forehead against hers, biting the inside of her lower lip, trying to control her laughter. "I'll be real quick!" She let her hands wander up her chest. Joey laughed and swatted her hands away. "I'm making the 'fishy soupy thing' I don't want to ruin it, I have a reputation to maintain!" She turned her back to Charlie.

"OK, you do your thing, I do mine!" Charlie giggled, put her arms around her waist, showering kisses over her shoulders, playing with the skin on her neck. She let her hands wander up her chest. Joey giggled, she couldn't help it, she turned the stove off, pulled the pot away and turned in her arms. "You have to come up with an excuse for the dinner!" She giggled and kissed her.

* * *

"Wow, this is really good, it's even better than usual, what did you do?" Rachel was impressed with the meal. Tony looked briefly up from his plate, nodding in agreement before he again dug into his plate. Joey blushed, "Oh, you know, when you put a little love into it…" Charlie was red from suppressed laughter.

A cry from the bedroom interrupted them, "I'll take him," Charlie offered, stood up and went to get him. She emerged with a sleepy Jordan on her arm. "Oh, Isn't he getting big!" Rachel's voice was filled with delight over the sight. She loved kids, she stood up and reached for him. Charlie gave him over to her, smiling at the expression on her face.

"He looks so much like you Joey, it's almost uncanny." She studied him. "And with those blue eyes, Charlie, they look just like yours." They did, he had long lashes, every girl would envy him them. The shape was so similar to Charlie's, and the color was exactly the same. They shifted color after the light and after his mood. They could go from brilliant blue to slate grey, even to green when the light was right. Just as Charlie's would.

Charlie sat down next to Joey, putting an arm around her, Joey smiled at her, gave her a kiss before they both turned their attention to Rachel and Jordan.

Rachel turned to Tony, grinning, "Shall we tell them?" She asked. Tony smiled at her and nodded before he continued eating. "Guy's, we have something we want to tell you, "She paused, her smile broadened. "We're having a baby!"

They all jumped to their feet, "Wow, that's fantastic, congratulations, when is the baby coming?" Questions and gratulations flew through the air. "I'm ten weeks pregnant, so it's early days still." She giggled. "It will be so good for Trent to get a brother or sister, I can't wait to get a little Beanie of our own!"

"Oh, don't start using that name. It will stick, look at Jordan, we hardly use his name, he is Beanie, he will never get rid of it. I think it's enough with one poor kid having to suffer with that name!" Joey couldn't help but giggle. Her attention shifted to Jordan as he started to cry.

"I think he's hungry, "Rachel gave him to Joey. "We're weaning him, but I still feed him morning and evening, it's not only about weaning him, I have to wean myself too." Joey sat down and put him to her breast. Leah, Rachel and Charlie couldn't tear their eyes away. The guys was to occupied with the food to notice anything else.

"This makes me babysick!" Leah sighed, "It would be so nice to have another baby. VJ certainly isn't one any longer!" She giggled. "No that's for sure, He has grown into a really great teenager, I want one too… Wait, I'm having one!" Rachel giggled.

Charlie sighed, she leaned closer to Joey, "I want us to have one more too!" Joey turned to her, found her lips and kissed her, "I want that too, I'll make babies with you, right now if you want to!" She smiled as their lips met again. Rachel followed their conversation, blushed a little at Joey's comment, but she was used to them. Even after nearly six years, they still reminded her more of teenagers just fallen in love, than a married couple. They still looked as if they were joined at the hip.

"You know, I don't mind helping you again, I have the contacts from last round, I think it would be a lot easier this time." Rachel leaned over to them. They looked at each other. They had decided a long time ago that they wanted two, and not too far apart. "I want to see you pregnant!" Joey whispered into Charlie's ear, "You'd look gorgeous!" She smiled. "I want to have a little life growing inside of me!" Charlie replied. They pulled slightly apart, looked into each other's eyes before they turned to Rachel. "We would love that, you were so great last time, we would love if you could do it this time too!"

A knock on the door interrupted them. "I'll get it!" Joey lifted Jordan up on her shoulder and rose from the table.

"I'll set you up for an appointment, and then I make the calls, and see what I can organize." Joey heard Rachel's voice as she walked to get the door. She smiled, she would love to have another baby with Charlie, she would look so gorgeous pregnant, she felt herself blush a little at the thought of a naked, pregnant Charlie. With a big grin, she opened the door.

Her smile froze on her face as she looked at the figure standing outside her door. She knew him very well, and it was the last persons she expected to see. He swayed a little, he looked at her, to the baby, she could see that he tried to make sense of it.

"Joey… I… how…? I thought …" He couldn't form a complete sentence. Joey just stared back at him, "what are you doing here? Finish what you started at the court case?" She spat at him. He noticed the ring onthe hand she was holding on Jordan's back.

"Joey… you have a kid… and a ring…but you told me you were gay… so that was just a phase?" He looked reviled. "I knew it was just crazy talk, it was that cop lady's fault, she got into your mind…" he hiccupped a little. "What about Charlie…"

"What about me?" Charlie came into view behind Joey, she put a hand on her shoulder. She had heard a familiar voice, followed Joey and had heard the whole thing. "Brett, what are you doing here? I have called the police, after what you did to Joey last time, I'm not taking any chances."

Brett stood with his jaw wide open. "How… how can you have a baby?"

"It's mine and Charlie's, we're married, and I don't want you here!" Joey felt tears streaming down her face. "I haven't seen you in, what? Five years? The last time I saw you, you tried to break my neck. You almost ruined my whole life, and when you show up, you're drunk!" She turned on her heels and ran into the house.

"Charlie, I just want to talk to her, she is still my sister." He looked at her. Charlie was disgusted. "If you wanted to talk to her, you should know better than showing up drunk! What do you expect, you almost broke her neck, you disowned her, and now you want her to receive you with open arms? You're crazy!"

"I… I didn't have the courage, I got drunk, it was stupid of me…" He looked like an embarrassed little boy. Charlie sighed. "You know what, come back when you're sober, but just so you know, I will have the police here, I don't know what you are capable of, and I'm not jeopardizing my family. If you want to talk, you come tomorrow around eleven, and you do all your speaking in the presence of an officer."

A police car turned up to the house, two officers stepped out. "Is everything OK here?" They asked. Charlie nodded, "Yeah, but could you do me the favor and take this 'gentleman' to his hotel? I don't want him hanging around here." They nodded, grabbed a hold of Brett and guided him to the car.

"What was that?" the worried crease on Leah's forehead had appeared. Charlie sat down beside Joey. Joey was shaking all over, her face was white. "Here, let me take Beanie," Leah leaned over and took him. Joey turned to Charlie and threw her arms around her neck, tears flowing freely down her cheek. The four others were looking worried, wondering what it was all about.

Charlie rubbed her hand up and down Joey's back. She looked at the four. They knew everything, she sighed."It was Brett, he showed up here drunk, I don't know what he wanted. I was scared, I called the police to come and get him. I told him he could come back tomorrow…" "You did what?" Joey tore herself away from her. "I don't want to see him, talk to him. I hate him. He almost took you away from me!" She rose so quickly from her chair that she knocked it over.

"Honey, I told him that we would have the police here, and that he had to be sober. I don't know what he want, or what he can do, but if he shows, I think we should give him a chance to explain why he's here."Charlie put her arms around her, holding her tight, Joey struggled for a little before she gave into the hug. She sobbed on her shoulder.

"I think Charlie is right Joey," Rachel stepped up beside her, put a hand on her shoulder. "If he has the guts to show up when there's police here, it might be important. It's a long time since you've seen him, maybe he has changed…"

Joey lifted her head from Charlie's shoulder, looking at Rachel. "Changed? Hell freezes over before he changes. You should see the look on his face when he thought I was married and had a baby with a guy… he will never change!"

"I think we should give him a chance, at least then you'll know that you have done what you can, I'll think you regret if you don't. We can do this together!" Charlie cupped her face in her hands, drying off the tears with her thumbs. Joey nodded slowly.


	29. Chapter 29

**As always, thank you for the great reviews. **

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Joey laid curled up in bed, spooning with Charlie. She let her hand stroke her arm. It was early, the sun wasn't up yet. She listened to her breathing, it was slow and steady, it filled her with peace. She listened for Jordan, he was in the room next to theirs, he had moved out just a month before. He was six months now, slept through the night, and was a really good kid. Joey smiled, she was happy.

Her smile disappeared, Brett… Why did he have to show now. They were happy, the Robbo thing was over. They were planning a new baby. Then he had to show. She sighed, she didn't want to see him. He reminded her of everything she wanted to put behind her. She felt a tear escape and find its way down her temple. She sniffled, she lifted her hand to wipe her eyes and nose. The movement woke Charlie.

She turned and looked at her, she saw the tears running. She put her arm around her and pulled her close. "Joey, it will be OK, I'm here for you," She spoke softly. "I know, it's just that I don't understand why something like this happens when we are so happy, can't we just be allowed to be happy?" She buried her head in Charlie's chest.

"Honey, I'm sorry to say this, but you have to work through everything that haunts you before you can truly put it behind you. You have experienced so much grief in your life. You have to face it before you can leave it." Charlie stroke her over the hair as she spoke. "You have faced Robbo, you have faced Lara. Honey, we have worked through it together, we can face Brett too!"

Joey listened, she new Charlie was right, but that didn't mean she wanted to. "It's just that he reminds me of everything that has happened in my life. I don't want to think about it, I want to focus on the life I have now, with you."

"I know, I want that too, and we will, we can do this, it will be like a walk in the park compared to everything we have faced!" Charlie placed a kiss on the top of her head. She didn't look forward to this at all, but, it had to be a reason why Brett would show up after so many years.

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"Thank you so much for coming Leah! We don't want to have to focus on Beanie while Brett's here."Charlie gave her a hug. "No worries, I'll always be here when you need me. Besides being with Beanie is always a delight, Isn't it Beanie? " She tickled him on his tummy with her chin, she was rewarded with laughter from him.

"I don't know how long it'll take, I don't even know if he shows…" Charlie sighed, she didn't know what she wished for, that he would show, or that he wouldn't. "I'm here for as long as you need me, I just give VJ a text if I'm late, he's big, he can watch himself." Leah placed her hand on Charlie's arm, just to show that she was there for them.

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Joey sat on the porch. She dreaded Brett's visit. Her thought wandered back to her childhood, to her mother. She forced her thought's away from the subject. A police car came up to the house, it was a great distraction. Charlie came out on the porch behind her.

"George, thank you for coming!" Charlie walked down to greet her. She had called her and asked her to come and be there when Brett was supposed to come. "Charlie, Joey, just glad I can be at your service!" She gave Charlie a hug.

Joey rose from the stairs. "Yeah thank you for coming, "She didn't sound very enthusiastic. "Hey, don't worry, we won't let him do anything, I brought officer Williams too, we won't have any problem dealing with Brett." She gave Joey's arm a squeeze. She knew why Joey was so apprehensive, she had been in the court room that day, and she had been one of the investigating officer after the rape. She was also the one interviewing Joey after he had failed a complaint against Charlie.

The four of them settled on the porch, Leah came and joined them since Jordan was taking a nap. They enjoyed a cup of coffee while they waited for Brett.

Joey was nervous, she couldn't concentrate on the conversation. Her mind raced, but she couldn't catch a single thought. She stared at the sea, biting on one of her fingernails. Charlie put her arm around her, and rested her chin on her shoulder. There wasn't anything to say, she just wanted her to know that she was there for her.

The sound of a car made them all turn, an old, grey car stopped a little distance from the house. They all rose to their feet. Brett stepped out, he looked at them, seeing the two officers. It looked like he wanted to sit right back in the car and take off. He looked between them and the sea a couple of times, before he shut the car door, and made his way over to them.

"I don't think it's necessary to have the police here, I'm not…" "Let me be the judge of that, thank you!" Charlie interrupted him. She stood before him with her arms crossed, having the advantage of the elevation, she did look kind of scary. Brett certainly looked scared. Joey couldn't help but smile, seeing Brett scared by her was kind of funny.

George went over to him and introduced herself and her colleague; "I'm Senior constable Watson, and this is officer Williams. We'll stay as long as we see fit, you have something you want to say, you say it with us here. At the smallest sign of treats or hassling, we'll arrest you."

Brett looked at her, it was no doubt that she meant businesses. He looked at Joey, he could see that she was apprehensive, He sighed. "Joey, I'm not going to do anything, they don't have to be here, we're family!" Joey looked at him, he looked like the same old Brett, she shook her head, "No, I want them to be here, if you have something you want to say, say it." She stepped closer to Charlie, who put an arm around her.

Brett looked insecure, his eyes wavered between them and the sea. He finally settled his eyes on them. "Well… I'm here because my wife and my therapist told me to."

"You're married? Wow… when did that happen?" Joey was surprised, she had never thought about Brett getting a family on his own.

"Yeah, I met her right after I left here, we have been married for a year… She didn't want to marry me before I started therapy, so I did… She didn't like the way I behaved… We have a kid, she didn't want him to grow up with a father like me. She gave me an ultimatum, either continue the way I was, and loose them both, or do something about it… I didn't want to lose them, so the choice was easy. Anyway, she has been nagging me about going to see you, and say that I'm sorry…" Brett looked sheepishly up at them.

Joey was shocked, she hadn't anticipated this. She was lost for words.

"And… there's one other thing…" Brett was clearly uncomfortable. "Our mother…" Charlie held Joey tighter. She didn't quite know what to believe, and she felt Joey tens up when he mentioned her mother.

"I… Well… She 's here…" Brett didn't look at them. "What…? How…? She can't be, we don't know where she is." Joey didn't believe him, she hadn't made any contact with them since she left more than twenty years ago.

Brett squirmed, "Well… I kind of knew… and we live in the same city, so eventually I made contact…"

Joey didn't know what to think, she couldn't believe what he said. She stepped away from Charlie, one step at the time she made her way down to him.

"How long have you known?" One step. "Ehh, since our father died…"

"Since he died? Brett I was fifteen, why didn't you tell me?" One more step. "I… I didn't think she disserved…"

"She disserved? What about me? You bashed me Brett, Did I disserve that?" One more step. "I'm sorry about that Jo…"

She was on same level with him, locking eyes with him. "How could you do that to me?" She was full of despite.

Charlie watched them, Watson and Williams stepped up to her, ready to take action if it should prove necessary. Charlie couldn't believe what she heard. She didn't understand. Her attention was pulled to the car as the passenger door opened, all of them had failed to notice that there was another figure in it.

A woman so alike Joey stepped out, Charlie' jaw dropped, she looked just like Joey, only a little older. She was beautiful, she had the same dark hair, only shorter, and there was fine lines around her eyes which had the same golden brown color as Joey's. There was no doubt, this was her mother. Charlie stared, it was like seeing Joey twenty years in the future.

She slowly made her way towards Joey, she was nervous, she couldn't hide her body language. Joey stared at her. She was torn between the feeling of running away and run into her arms. She stood frozen to the spot. "Joey… " She started. She studied the kid she hadn't seen since she was five. She wasn't a kid anymore. Lily teared up, "Joey, please… I'm sorry…"

Joey stared at her mother. She could see herself in her. She felt herself fill up with anger, hurt, the feeling she had when she was five and she had realized that she had left her. She struggled to breathe, seeing her was so painful, it felt like a vice was placed round her ribcage, forcing every ounce of air out of her.

"What are you doing here?" She spat at her. "You show up twenty years too late, how can you do this to me?" Joey felt tears running down her cheek, angrily she whipped them away. She was not going to cry.

"Joey, I'm sorry I left you, I couldn't stay there any longer…" Lily tried to explain, Joey cut her off, "You should have taken me with you, but you left me there, you abandoned me, because of you I turned from being a kid to a punching ball, I hate you!" She couldn't control her tears any longer.

"Joey, I'm sorry, I did a terrible mistake, I didn't know… I was sixteen when I had Brett, I was twenty when I had you… Joey, ten years with abuse, I couldn't take it any longer. I didn't think he would hurt you…"

"Being young is not an excuse…" Joey was interrupted by the sound of crying from the house. Leah hurried to get Jordan.

"Ehh… you got a kid?" Lily looked from the house to Joey, she noticed the ring on her hand, "You're married? Your husband, is he at work?"

Joey didn't know what to do with herself. Here Brett was, having contact with her mother, and haven't told her about Charlie and her. She was so mad, "I have a kid, and I am married, and I get that Brett hasn't said a word. " She almost screamed at her. "I married to Charlie, and that's not a guy!" Lily looked like a fish on dry land, her mouth opened and closed.

"And I guess homophobia runs to the family!" Joey was disgusted. Charlie stepped up beside her, reached out her hand to Lily, "I'm Charlie, and I'm married to your daughter." Lily looked down at her hand, up in her face, over to Joey, to Brett. She didn't take her hand. Charlie let hers fall.

"You can just leave, both of you. I don't need you anymore." Joey felt that she started to lose control of herself. "Oh, maybe I should get you up to date on my life, just so you can hear what you have missed out on?" Joey didn't know what she was doing, she just wanted to get rid of her, she wanted her to know what she had caused her to go through.

"You was only sixteen when you had Brett, twenty when you had me. Well, let's see what happened to me when I was sixteen… Yeah, I pashed a girl for the first time, a girl that tried to kill me a few months ago, and my brother bashed me for it, after his best friend had his go at me. " Joey was shouting into her mother's face.

"Oh, let's see, let me go further back! At five, my mother left me, left me with an alcoholic, abusive father. When I was ten, he burned my hand on the stove because I accidently burned his toast. At twelve, he broke my arm, because I didn't do the dishes fast enough. At fifteen he died, he got drunk, as usual, walked down on the pier, fell in the sea and drowned. I was relieved! Have you any idea how terrible it was to be relieved over my own father's death, Do you?" She screamed, she didn't have any control. Charlie tried to get a hold of her, calming her down, she just jerked out of her grip.

"When I was twenty, my brothers best friend raped me, and Brett didn't believe me. The guy tried to kill me. Charlie saved me, we was in love, she is the best thing that has ever happened to me, and you hate it! Oh yeah, just so we don't leave anything out. At twenty three, that guy raped me again, and he killed me. Charlie was my lifeline yet again. At twenty four we got married, and yeas it's legally binding,. We went to Norway to do it. When we got back, it took three months, and she got shot. I thought I had lost her, sorry to tell you, you would have liked it if I did, but she made it. Six months ago, we had a beautiful baby boy. We were happy, I don't want you here to destroy that!" Joey was just inches away from Lily's face, staring into her eyes before she turned and ran.

"Joey…" Lily called after her, tears was streaming down her face. She saw Joey disappear down the beach. She turned to Charlie, "I'm sorry…" Charlie stared at her, "I'm not the one who needs to hear that." Her voice was calm and ice cold. She was chocked to hear Joey, she had heard it before, but that didn't make it any easier, and in front of her stood the person who could have prevented everything. "I have to go after her."

"Please, "Lily grabbed her arm. "I didn't know…If I knew I would have taken her with me." Charlie turned slowly, trying to control her feelings. "Why didn't you check?"


	30. Chapter 30

**Thank you for all your great reviews, i wasn't sure about taking this turn, I hope you all like it.**

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Joey ran, tears streaming down her face. She ran until she couldn't run no more. She collapsed in the sand, heaving for air. She was devastated. Seeing her mother had woken too many memories, she sobbed. She had missed her mother, but for her to show up now was just too late.

Joey wished she had never seen her. Not knowing her, not knowing where she was had enabled her to forget about her, she wasn't a real person. Seeing her now made her all the more real. They looked so much alike. Joey saw all her own features in her face.

Brett had contact with her, he knew where she was, they lived in the same city, and he hadn't told about Charlie. She knew it, he hated the fact that she was gay, he would never be OK with it. She rolled over on her back, staring up in the sky. He could go to hell, they both could.

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Charlie studied Joey's mum. She was disgusted with her, at the same time she looked so much like Joey and that made it so much harder. Her phone rang and tore her eyes of her, it was Joey. "Honey where are you? OK… Don't be too long, or I come and look for you!" Joey called to say that she needed some time on her own.

Charlie stared out over the sea. She didn't want to look at Joey's mother any longer. What she had done to Joey was unforgivable, but looking at her gave her a feeling of wanting to protect her. Joey's dad must have put her through hell since she opted to leave her kids behind.

She shook her head, there was no excuse to leave your kids, no matter what, you don't leave your kids behind. She fought the desire to throw up at the thought of what that woman had caused Joey to go through.

Someone was sobbing, she turned to see whom. She saw Leah handing Jordan over to George, tears streaming down her face. She walked down the stairs, headed straight for Lily. She heaved for air a couple of times, stepped so close to Lily that there was barely any air between them. She put her index finger in her face.

"You… how could you do that to Joey. I heard it all, being young is no excuse. I had my son when I was twenty, I can never imagine leaving him. I would take him with me!" Leah's voice was low and intense, she was shaking from withholding her feelings. "You should get the hell out of here, you don't disserve her. I'm more of a mother to her than you will ever be!" Leah upped the volume. Lily stepped back, Leah followed.

"I opened my home to her after she was raped and her brother kicked her out for being gay. The same brother that believed his friend over his sister. I learned to love her, I gave her a home, something she had never had before. I gave her a place where she was loved, safe, cared for. I have seen her through hell and back. You know what, that wouldn't have been necessary if it weren't for you… She is my daughter, I love her like you should, I'm not standing back, watching you ruin her life again. You don't disserve her!"

Charlie was a little flabbergasted by Leah's outburst, in any other circumstance she would have found it funny. Leah reminded her of an angry wasp. Leah could be scary when she was angry, and Charlie was grateful she wasn't on the receiving end of her tirade.

George came over to her, handed her Jordan. She had seen the look on Brett's face as Leah tore into his mother, she wanted to be ready.

Leah was disgusted, all her motherly instinct had kicked into action. She wanted to protect Joey. She had never heard any details from Joey's childhood, she knew that she had been hit and that her father was an alcoholic. Hearing what he had done to her made her lose her temper. She scowled at Lily, she wanted to take a swing at her, but she didn't want to lower herself to that level. She turned on her heels, leaving a chocked Lily to stare at her back.

Leah went over to Charlie and took Jordan, she wanted the comfort of having him I her arms. Lily's attention was drawn to him. "Is that Joey's…" She choked a little. Charlie stepped closer to her. "That's our kid, me and Joey's!" She stood in front of her, hands firmly placed on her hip, daring Lily to challenge her. Lily looked from her to Jordan and back again. "How…?" she tried to make sense of it. "You're a…"

"Yeah, I am, and obviously you have a problem with that. I think you should leave, both of you. We don't need a long lost homophobic mother. If you want to support your daughter, if you want to accept her, us, then you can come here. Until then, get out of here!" Charlie wanted to grab her by the collar of her jacket and physically remove her.

"Charlie… can't we…"Lily tried to plead with her. "No, we can't, you sort yourself out, you figure out if you want to see your daughter again. If you do, you'll see me, we're a package!" Charlie was angry and hurt. She battled the tears burning in her eyes.

Brett stepped in, "Charlie…" She interrupted him, "I want you out of here now!" Brett took a step closer. Watson and Williams closed his way. "I think that you should do as Sergeant Buckton requested. You are no longer wanted here, if you don't leave, I have you arrested for trespassing!" George pulled up Charlie's title on purpose, she wanted them to know this wasn't a joke.

"Come on, "Brett grabbed a hold of Lily's elbow and guided her to the car.

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Joey rose and started on her way back home. She had needed sometime to herself, but all she wanted now was to go home, snuggle up with Jordan and Charlie, just enjoy her real family.

As she walked along the beach, she saw a familiar figure sitting in the sand, holding on to her knees with one arm, her shoes dangling from the other. She was staring out over the sea, but she looked lost in her thoughts.

Joey stopped and sat down beside her, mirroring her position. Leah looked at her, let go of her shoes and put her arm around her waist. She leaned her head on Joey's shoulder. "I'm so sorry Joey… I really wish I were your mother. I would have taken care of you, been there for you, loved you…" She wiped away tears streaming down her face.

"I wish you were too, "Joey whispered back. "I would have loved to be your daughter." She rested her head on top of Leah's. "I'm so sorry for everything you had to endure, you shouldn't have to. No kid should have to go through that." Leah sniffled a few times.

"I'm grateful for the time I have known you, you have been so supportive of me. I want to cherish the time we have, not think about the time we didn't. Leah, I love you, I have told you before, but that doesn't make it less true, you are like a mother to me. You will always be." Joey took Leah in her arms and hugged her. They sat for a long time just holding each other. Finally Leah pulled back a little, cupped Joey's face in her hands, "I love you girl, I wish I could make everything vanish, give you a happy and playful childhood. I can't , but I will always be here for you."

They sat for a while looking over the ocean. Leah was lost in her thoughts. "I should get home," Joey gave Leah's arm a squeeze, "Charlie is probably getting worried." "Yeah, you should get home, I'm just gonna sit here for a bit longer."Leah gave her a final hug.

Leah looked at Joey walking down the beach. She hurt for her. She had been shocked to hear Joey shouting at her mother. She had known that she didn't have a good childhood, but she never dreamt that it was so bad. She had flashes of Joey as a little girl running through her head. She could see her crying when she realized that her mother had left. She saw her hand blister as her father held it over the stove. She saw him bashing her so hard that her arm broke.

Leah sobbed, she hurt so bad for her. She truly wished she were Joey's mother. She wished she could give her the childhood she disserved. She curled herself into a ball, hiding her head in her arms and sobbed. She jumped as she felt someone putting an arm around her shoulder. She looked up, it was Rachel.

"Hey, what's the matter?" Rachel sat down beside her, she was worried, it wasn't like Leah to cry for no reason. Leah looked at her, gave her a half-hearted smile," Joey's mother showed up today…" "Oh…" Rachel understood why Leah was so upset. "Joey lost it and yelled at her. She told her everything she had missed out on, and it wasn't anything good." Leah whipped her face.

Rachel rubbed her back, fixating her eyes on the horizon. Leah looked at her, "You knew, didn't you?" Rachel nodded. "I wish I didn't…" Leah whispered.

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Charlie sat on the porch with Joey on her lap, Jordan was asleep, they were both tired. The day had been an emotional rollercoaster. The evening was nice, they just relaxed with each other and a cup of coffee.

"Charlie, thank you for being here for me. I'm surprised that you're not fed up with me and all my problems."

"I'll never get fed up with you, I love you!" Charlie placed a kiss on her forehead. "you're the mother of my child, you are my best friend, you are my wife. I don't care about what meets us. I just want you. I want to be here for you, I want to get us through this."

Joey lifted her head and looked into her eyes. "You know I love you too. You are all the family I want, you and our kids. I want to give our kids the childhood I never had. I want to be the mother I never had… Charlie, how could she leave me?" Tears started to run again. Charlie cupped her face, drying of the tears with her thumbs. She didn't have any answer.

She put her hand behind Joey's head, pulled her in for a kiss before she leaned her head on her shoulder. She looked out on the sea, not seeing anything, all her attention was on Joey.

She noticed a person walking up to the house. She looked as a blond, petit woman approached them. The woman stopped at the stairs, looking at them. She cleared her throat, "Hi, I'm Annie, Brett's wife."


	31. Chapter 31

**First of all: WOW, 201 revies! Thank you all so much, Thank you for all your kind and encouraging words. **

**I love writing for you, your reviews keep me going! This chapter is short, it was hard to write, but more will follow soon.**

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Joey studied the woman sitting on the porch with them. She was cute, long blond hair, and she was about the same size as Leah. Joey wondered how her brother had found such a nice girl and what on earth she saw in him.

"I just wanted to meet you," Annie broke the silence,"Brett has told me so much about you, and I wanted to meet his sister." Joey looked at her, "Did he tell you I'm gay, that he bashed me for it, more than once?" She wasn't in the mood to beat around the bush.

Annie looked her straight in the eyes. Joey could sense an inner strength in her that didn't fit the outer size. "He told me he bashed you, he sort of told me you're gay," her lip curled up a little. "He told me about this crazy cop lady that got into your head, I assumed she wasn't crazy, and that she had got into your head, but in a good way." She looked at them. "I was right, I'm happy for you. Love is love, there's no difference."

Joey became even more bewildered as Annie spoke. How could Brett end up with someone like this woman? She leaned closer to Charlie, suddenly she was filled with dread. Brett had hit her, what if he bashed his wife? Charlie beat her to the question, "Annie, you know Brett bashed Joey, and I have to ask… Does he hit you?" Charlie put her arm around Joey, holding her close.

"I know he hit Joey, and I have seen the uncontrolled anger that caused him to do it… That's way I gave him that ultimatum two years ago, continue the way he was and lose us both, or do something about it. He did something about it, he has been in therapy for two years. He has never hit me" Annie leaned closer and put her hand on Joey's arm. "I'm sorry he did that to you. You didn't disserve it, and it wasn't your fault."

Charlie felt herself tear up. This was so unexpected. Annie was a lovely lady. She was cute, but she wouldn't stand out in a crowd, but the peace and strength that flowed from her made her breathtaking.

Annie continued, "You see, Brett loves you, but the only way he knew how to express himself was through violence. Maybe it was easier for him when your mother left, he was older and he was a boy, your father liked him because he was. It also meant that he witnessed his father bashing your mother. He has told me about it. He used to be so scared, sure that he would kill her and he wasn't able to stop him. At the same time, he loved his father. He used to take him fishing, he taught him about boats. He spent a lot of time with him…"

Joey had tears running down her face. She had never thought about how it was for Brett. He was older, and treating her as he did just made her despite him. She turned her head and looked at Charlie, she too had tears in her eyes.

Annie took a sip of coffee before she continued."He experienced a loving father towards him, that would bash his mother. He was so scared for your mother, he knew it wasn't right. He tried to stop him, but he was ten when she left. His father would tell him that it was what you do. When you love someone, you hit them because that's the only way they would learn. By the time she left, it had become normal to him, so when your father started to take it out on you, he didn't see anything wrong, on the contrary, he started to hit you too. Violence breeds violence"

Tears ran down her face. "I'm so sorry Joey, I'm so sorry that you had to endure that. Nothing can justify what he did, what his father did. What I tell you is not an excuse, it's an explanation..."

"Well, I better be going. It was nice to meet both of you." She rose to her feet. Joey and Charlie rose too. "I was right Charlie, you aren't crazy, and I can see how much you too love each other just from being here this short time." She went over to Charlie and threw her arms around her. "I'm so glad that Joey has someone like you. Some one that can give her the life and love she disserves." She cupped Charlie's face in her hand, studying her."I can see in your eyes the love you have for her. I know it can be hard to deal with memories and traumas haunting the one you love. No matter what Charlie, they are worth it!" She gave her another hug.

Annie turned to Joey and gave her the same treatment. "Joey, I love Brett, and the man that he was meant to be is starting to show. I'm sorry he wasn't. I'm sorry for what your father turned him into. Joey, let the family you have chosen be here for you. Let Charlie be your lifeline. I know she will be here for you, love you, help you, if you let her. When you walk through thoughts and memories in your mind, take her with you. She wants to be there for you, just as I want to be there for Brett. Don't ever think that she can't take it. I know she can, I can see it."

She took one of Charlie's and one of Joey's hands in her own, holding them for a moment before she turned and walked down the stairs.


	32. Chapter 32

"Annie!" Joey called after her. Annie stopped and turned. "Annie, maybe we could, if you like, maybe we could meet for lunch tomorrow?" Annie smiled up at her, "Yeah, I would like that. We're in town for a couple of days."

"You can take Brett with you, if you want to…" Joey offered, not knowing if she wanted him there or not.

"I talk to him, we'll see… Tomorrow then, about midday?" Annie asked.

"Yeah, we have a lovely Diner here, we could do lunch there. Do you know where it is?" Annie nodded in response before she disappeared down the road. Joey turned to Charlie and put her arms around her. She was overwhelmed by Annie's visit.

Charlie tried to comprehend what she had heard. She had never seen Brett as a victim, he was the abuser. She had never dwelled on the thought of what growing up with an abusive father had done to him. At the same time, that was not an excuse. She knew people that had grown up being abused without them turning abusive.

Joey was one of them. She never lost her temper, she had never lifted a hand to hurt others. She had the patience of an angel. She was loving and caring towards everyone. It wasn't because she was a girl. Women could turn violent just as easy as men. On some level, at some point, it was a choice.

She lifted Joey's head, "You know she is right, I love you, I will always be here for you, and I can take it." She cried. What Annie had said was so true, Joey was worth it. Charlie kissed her, putting all her love into it. The taste of Joey soon mixed with the taste of salty tears. They were both crying.

For a long time they stood there, embraced, kissing each other whilst crying. Seeking comfort and consolation.

They went to bed and snuggled up with each other. They rested their heads on their own arm, elbows touching. Charlie had her other arm around Joey's waist and Joey used hers to trace the shape of Charlie's collarbone. "That was an eye opener, I have never thought about how it was for Brett." Joey looked into Charlie's eyes.

"You know it's not an excuse for treating you the way he did," Charlie felt like Joey was about to take the blame for what Brett had done. She had blamed herself for being raped, and Charlie knew that it was easy for her to think it was her fault.

"I know, I can feel those thoughts try to enter my mind, but I know it wasn't my fault. At least I know that in my head, and I'm sure my heart will follow. " Joey put her hand on Charlie's cheek. "I know I have the best wife any one can have. I look forward to the rest of our life. This, we will get through this too. " She kissed her.

She rolled Charlie over to her back, continued kissing her. "I love you so much, you are my everything, "She whispered in between kisses. She let her mouth trace a path down to her chest. "Let me love you, Charlie. I need you, I need to feel you." She retraced her path and found her lips again.

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"So Beanie, this is it, you're about to meet your uncle and aunt!" Joey pushed the stroller into the Diner, Charlie held the door for her. Joey stopped and gave her a kiss, "Thank you, for everything!" Charlie smiled at her, "My pleasure… really my pleasure!" She gave her a cheeky grin, referring to the night. Joey blushed, it had been an amazing night. They had made love into the early hours, finding comfort, pleasure and love in each other. "Maybe we should just forget about this, go home and continue where we left of?" Joey whispered to her, giving her yet another kiss.

"Hi, good to see you again!" They were drawn apart by Annie's voice."We found a table, come and join us!" She grinned at them, not the slightest bit embarrassed to catch them kissing. Joey turned and looked at her, then at Brett sitting by a table with his son on his lap. Annie guided them over.

"This is Jonathan, or Jo for short" Annie picked up the toddler from his father's lap. The boy hid his face in his mothers hair. She giggled, "Sorry about that, he goes through a stage where everyone is dangerous." She put him back on Brett's lap. Jo leaned into his chest and glanced up at them.

"Hi Jo, nice to meet you," Joey kneeled down to get on eye level with him. "My name is Jo too, or that's what your father always calls me," She motioned to the stroller, "and this is Jordan, we have a nickname on him too, but I won't tell you what that is." She smiled and patted him on his knee.

They sat down, Joey put her chair next to Charlie's, she felt like she needed her close. Leah came over to take their orders. She didn't look good at all. Her hair had just randomly been put up, she had dark rings under her eyes and a look of sadness on her face.

"Are you OK Leah?" Charlie studied her. "yeah… sure, didn't sleep well last night, nothing to worry about." She brushed her off. "What can I get you?" They gave their orders. Joey leaned in to Charlie, "Something is going on with Leah, she didn't even say hi, it's not like her." "I know, Maybe I pop by later and talk to her." Charlie whispered back. She was a little worried, this wasn't like Leah at all. Usually she was bubbly, friendly and talked to everyone. She decided to pay her a visit later.

"There's no point beating around the bush, is there?" Brett looked at them. Joey had Jordan on her lap and Charlie's arm around her shoulder. Charlie pulled Joey a little closer. Annie was a lovely lady, but they had never seen a nice side of Brett, Charlie braced herself for what was coming.

"I'm not happy with the two of you…" Joey took a hold of Charlie's hand, not liking what she heard. "But Annie is right, you love each other, you have a family together… I can't lie and say that I'm over the moon for it, but I am working on it, and I want to be happy for you. I have never given you a chance. Charlie, I don't know you, I would like to get to, I have solely judged you on my fear of not being in control of Joey."

Charlie looked at him, she didn't know how to interpret this. She didn't know if she wanted to get to know the person who had nearly destroyed her life.

"I was a prick for doing what I did to you, I'm sorry. I didn't want you to ruin my sisters life, I didn't want to lose control." Brett stared down on the table, stealing one or two glances at them. Charlie chewed her lip, looking at Joey who was staring blankly at Brett. "Brett, I don't know if I want to get to know you. It's obvious that you have a problem even looking at us. I'm not going to keep Joey on a distance just to please you. If you can't even look at us holding hands… How is this going to work out?" Charlie stared at him.

Brett looked up and found her face, he looked her straight in the eyes for a long time. Charlie suddenly felt that she could see a glimpse of what Annie saw. "Charlie, I promise you, I will work on this. I will not ask you to keep Joey at a distance. It's strange to see her in your arms, but I want to keep my wife close," he paused and grabbed a hold of Annie's hand."I understand that you want to keep yours close too. I understand that you might not want to know me. I have been terrible to you and Joey. Charlie, I'm starting to be a new man. I'm asking you to get to know him."

Charlie could feel tears burning in her eyes. She looked at Joey, there were tears lurking in the corners of her eyes to.

"Brett, I don't know if I can ever forgive you for what you did to me, to Charlie." Joey had found her voice again. "Because of you I almost lost her. Charlie is the best thing that has ever happened to me." She paused and turned to Charlie, placing a soft kiss on her lips. "Maybe that's way our love is so strong, because it was so hard. We had to fight to get there, it costed us both a lot… Maybe that foundation has allowed us to survive all the hardship. We don't have a shallow love, we have a love rooted in the knowledge that life isn't worth living without each other. We have a love strong enough to stand the test of time, that is strong enough to carry us through even the roughest paths." She placed a hand on Charlie's cheek, looked into blue wells of love looking back at her.

Joey turned to Brett again. "That is not an excuse for what you did. Annie talked to us yesterday, I understand, but that doesn't make it OK. But if Charlie wants to… Maybe we can work on putting this behind us, and get to know each other again, as the persons we really are… And besides, I kind of like your wife, I think she's good for you!" She gave him a little smile, turned to Charlie to see what she said."OK, I'm willing to give it a go…"

"Joey," Charlie was interrupted by a voice, they turned simultaneously, finding Joey's mother standing behind them. Joey jumped to her feet, "What are you doing here?" She looked at Brett, "did you tell her to come?" "No, he didn't I was just getting a cup of coffee, and I saw you all here. Joey, can't we please talk?"

Joey looked at Charlie then to Brett and back at Charlie. She sat down not answering. Lily took it as a sign to join them. Leah came over with their lunch, at the sight of Lily she froze. She tried to regain her composure, she managed to get the dishes on the table. She stared at Lily, locking eyes with her, before she turned and ran out of there. Charlie wanted to follow her, but she couldn't leave. She would catch up with her later

Colleen came over to check out the new arrival, "So, this is your mother, you look exactly like her, It's like me and Lancie, everybody tells us how alike we are. And Brett, oh goodness, you have a kid, and a wife, yes, that's the way to do it, you see Joey, you have to have a wife." Colleen was unstoppable.

"Colleen, I have a wife!" Joey couldn't help but giggle. Colleen frowned at her and walked back to the counter.

Lily couldn't take her eyes off Charlie. Charlie started to feel uncomfortable under her scrutiny. "I…" Lily tried to get words out. "Joey I don't like this." Joey stared at her. "If you don't like this, you don't have to be here. I didn't ask you to come back, and if you can't accept us, go to hell!"

"Joey, you and Charlie, It goes against everything I believe in."Lily tried to explain. Joey saw red, "So me loving a person, that I am happy, that we have found something so precious, that goes against everything you believe in?"

"You know it's unnatural, it's wrong for two people of the same sex to be together. You should be ashamed of yourself, ashamed that you bring a kid into it. You shouldn't have kids."

"What? We shouldn't have kids? What about you? You're the one who shouldn't have kids. You ruined us. You should be ashamed of yourself. There's nothing wrong about us. We love each other, we have a wonderful life together. Mum… Go to hell!" Joey was heaving for air, she was angry.

"But you are both women, it's wrong, you shouldn't…" She was interrupted by a shrill voice.

"You should be ashamed of yourself. Don't you know that mothers are supposed to support their kids? Look at my Lancie, I always support him, even the times when he makes stupid decisions. Don't you know that God put love first? You should be ashamed, talking like that!" Charlie and Joey stared at Colleen with their jaws wide open.

Colleen had never supported them. In the beginning she always used the term 'unnatural' when she saw them, but since they got married she had just left it to complaining about them showing off their affection. Neither of them had ever expected her to stick up for them. Colleen turned on her heel and left them.

Lily was left flabbergasted. She looked at Joey staring after the woman. She looked at Charlie, and the way she held her. She sighed, Colleen was right, it was a stupid decision, but if she wanted to get Joey back in her life, she could pretend to be OK with it.

"Joey, it's just that, well, my religion…" Lily stammered. Joey looked at her with disgust in her eyes. "So according to your religion, it's wrong to love, but it's right to walk out on your kids?"

There's also forgiveness in my religion," She said softly. Joey looked at her, then to Charlie, turning her back completely to Lily. She looked over Charlie's shoulder, chewing her lips. Charlie placed a hand on her cheek, tracing her lips with her thumb. Joey looked at her and gave her a kiss. "I love you Charlie, just so you know!" She smiled at her.

Joey turned to Lily. "I'm married to Charlie, I have her kid. I will never let her go. There might be forgiveness in your religion… I can't give you that." She was calm and clear. "Your religion is no excuse for treating us like you do. I would appreciate if you take some time on your own and figure out what you want. I can't give you forgiveness, I don't know if I ever can. But I won't deny you contact with us. That is on the condition that you accept and support us. If you can't, I don't want you in our life. I have lived without you for twenty years. I don't need you, but you might need us."

Lily studied them, it had been strange to see her daughter kissing another woman, she battled with herself."You're right Joey, I need some time to figure this out. Can I give you a call or something when I have?" "I don't know, I just don't know." Joey shook her head

"Tell me, and I'll be the messenger," Annie suggested. They both nodded. Lily rose to leave. "I guess I should tell you Joey, "Lily studied the floor intently, then lifted her head and looked at her. "You have a brother and a sister" She left, leaving Charlie and Joey in shock.


	33. Chapter 33

**Thank you for all your reviews, I'm sorry for all the hardship I put them through, but it's near the end of that, mush will follow in the nearest future:) **

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Charlie walked slowly towards Leah's place. The conversation from the lunch spun around in her head. She felt overwhelmed, it was too much to take in. Brett being nice, he had surprised her, she still wasn't sure how it would work out, but she agreed with Joey, they should give him chance.

Joey's mother on the other hand. Her thought went to her Dad. She became even more grateful for the way he had accepted them. Having Lily opposing them was hard, specially since she just waltzed into their life and judge them. Charlie was hurt and angry, that lady had some nerves to go judgmental on them. She took a few deep breaths to calm herself down.

Lily had upset both of them. Charlie was impressed by the way Joey had told her off, she was right, Lily had to sort herself out. She giggled a little at the thought of Colleen sticking up for them. They had talked to her afterwards, thanking her for doing it.

Colleen had looked like an embarrassed school kid. She told them that in the beginning she did think it was unnatural, but as time went by, she could see that they really loved each other, she just wished they could act like normal married couples, not like horny teenagers. She ended with throwing her hands up in the air, shaking her head and left to take someone's order.

Charlie paused for a moment. Looking out over the sea. Her smile disappeared. Joey had siblings. That was the worst news of the day. Lily had left them with that shocking information, leaving Brett to explain. Lily had remarried a few years after leaving them, she had a son and a daughter, sixteen and eighteen. It had been like punching Joey in the face.

They had excused them self and left. Joey was devastated, it was worse than being left, she felt like her mother had replaced her. She couldn't understand how Lily could have a family and forget that she had left one behind. Charlie didn't get that either. Not with her best will could she understand what Lily did.

She thought about Beanie. She tried to imagine leaving him. She knew that she couldn't, he was such a big part of her, her heart belonged to him.

Her lips curled up a little, Annie had been so right, she felt like the luckiest woman alive. Joey was worth it. She loved her, Joey had been right too, that they had a difficult start on their relationship made it strong. You don't easily give up on what you have to pay dearly for.

* * *

Leah was trying to get some housework done. It was hard, she couldn't concentrate, images kept flying through her mind. Learning about Joey's childhood had really gotten to her. She was startled by a knock on the door. She went into the kitchen and found Charlie waiting for her.

"So, what's going on?" Charlie asked after they had sat down at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee. Leah looked at her, not quite knowing what to say. "I know something is bugging you, and I think it has something to do with Joey's mother, hasn't it?" Charlie leaned closer and placed a hand on top of Leah's.

Leah had a tear running down her face. "I… I just don't get how you do it!" Leah looked at her.

"Do what?"

"How do you cope with all the terrible things that Joey has gone through? I can't get rid of picture's in my head of her. All I want to do is protect her, make it not true." She wiped away tears.

"I love her, that's how," Charlie leaned back with a little smile on her lips. "I want to be with her, I want to have our kids. Her past is a part of who she is. It's difficult to hear about it, but I see how happy she is now. I see how happy I make her. We work through it together, slowly we leave everything behind."

"I remember the broken girl I saw that day in the Surfclub, she was utterly devastated. Robbo was hassling her and she hid in the storage room. There isn't a trace of that insecure, frightened girl left. She is strong, confident and she is happy. These things come along, they are hard to deal with. We do get upset and sad. But if you scratch the surface of pain, you'll find the foundation of love and happiness."

Leah looked at her. "Look Leah, you make Joey happy, she loves you like a mother. Don't think about what you can't do for her, think about what you can. What you already have given her. You are family! Not Lily, a long lost homophobic mother who is so messed up, she can't even think for herself."

Leah giggled, then sighed and placed her hand of top of Charlie's resting on hers. "You're right. I have to focus on 'what is', and not 'what if'. I will always be here for you. It might take some time getting over this, but Joey is in my life for keeps. Charlie, so are you! I guess you have to take the bad things, not allowing them to overshaddow all the good things." Charlie rose and pulled Leah up for a hug. "You know we love you, and you're in our life for keeps too!"

* * *

"So how was Leah?" Joey greeted Charlie at the door. "She was just upset by your mother, she loves you, and it was hard on her to hear. I told her that she was ours for keeps, and that she makes you happy." She kissed her, "You make me happy!"

"She does, but not like you do!" Joey giggled back. She pulled her over to the sofa. They sat down, Joey placed Charlie's feet in her lap. " I've been thinking," Joey brushed her fingers up and down Charlie's leg. "I think I want to meet my sister and brother, it's not their fault that Lily left me. I think it would be nice. What do you think?"

"I think that has to be up to you, but I know that I love having a sister. Maybe it would be nice to meet them. I think knowing about them makes it hard to forget, so we might as well see them… What about your mother?" Charlie studied her

"I think I did the right thing at the Diner. Having you in my life is so much more important than her. If she won't accept us, I don't want her here. Religion is no excuse, Colleen was right, God put love first." She giggled, "Never in a million years would I expect Colleen to stand up for us, Miracles do happen! Maybe miracles happens with Lily, if it does, I want her in our life. If not… Well I have Leah!"

She let her hand wander to behind Charlie's head, pulled her toward her and kissed her, "and I got you! What more can a girl want?" Charlie smiled, lips almost touching."Miracles do happen, look at Brett, if that isn't a miracle, I don't know what is."

"Yeah, a miracle by the name Annie. I'm so glad that I met her. I'm happy for Brett. I look forward to get to know them."Joey kissed her again.

"Yeah, I never thought I would look forward to spend time with him, but he certainly has changed!" Charlie let her legs slide to the floor and pushed Joey back. "I look more forward to spend time with you!" She gave her a cheeky grin. She used her legs to lock Joey's arms to her side. Straddling her she started a tickle attack. Joey laughed and screamed trying to wiggle out of her hold.

Charlie gave up and kissed her instead. "You might have more family now, but I want to make more family with you!"


	34. Chapter 34

**I'm not sure how well this chapter flows, I found it quite difficult to get the story going. I'm moving from dealing with one topic to an other, and getting the transition flowing was much harder than I expected. I think it will get better after this, so please bear with me. **

**And of course: Thank you for all your kind reviews !**

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Rachel was sitting in her office, looking through Charlie's file. She had set her and Joey up for an appointment to do a physical on Charlie before going ahead and make contact with the sperm bank. She was slightly concerned. She sighed and went out to the reception to look for them.

"Hi, Rachel! Good to see you!" Charlie and Joey greeted her with a big smile. Rachel smiled back, the two of them always made her feel good. "Good to see you too, let's step into my office!" She led the way.

She studied the two women sitting in front of her. "So, how was the meeting with your family Joey?" Joey grinned and shrugged her shoulders. "Well, both very good, and quite bad. I opt to focus on the good. Brett's in therapy and he's really a changed man. He has a lovely wife and a son. We look forward to get to know them." She looked at Charlie grinning back at her. "My mother, well, she has to sort herself out, but we are going to meet my siblings this weekend, so that's going to be interesting." Joey finished.

"Good to hear, I know we haven't talked, if you feel the need to, I'm happy to have some counseling sessions with you." Rachel smiled at Joey. "I'm glad you both could come today. I understand that this is an emotional stressful time. Brett and the rest left yesterday?"

Joey nodded.

"Well, I wanted you in because I looked through your medical records Charlie. Since you want to have a baby, I took the time to go over the pictures from your injury." Rachel looked at Charlie she could see that she tensed up. Joey grabbed a hold of Charlie's hand.

"It's probably going to be just fine. You where shot relatively high in the stomach, and we didn't touch the uterus or any reproductive organs."Rachel could see the relief on them both. "But I want to be sure that there's no scar tissue that can cause problems during the pregnancy, so I would like to do a catscan before I contact the sperm bank."

Charlie nodded. She had never considered that her injury would cause any problem. She felt nervous, what if there was something wrong? She didn't have any problems, the first months had been hell, it took a long time before she could stretch without pain. She couldn't wear any tight clothes, they would hurt, and training had been out of the question for six months.

"But… I feel fine, I'm never in pain, nothing is bothering me, are you sure there's something wrong?" Charlie leaned over the desk, Joey put her hand on the small of her back. "No, I don't think there's anything wrong, I just want to be on the safe side." Rachel put her hand on top of Charlie's. "Don't worry, it's just for precaution."

Charlie nodded, "when do we do it?"

"Now, then it's out of the way!" Rachel smiled and rose. "I show you the way. Charlie and Joey rose and followed her.

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"Charlie, it's going to be OK!" Joey put her arms around Charlie. They were standing in the changing room. Charlie had started to unbutton her shirt when she froze. "You heard what Rachel said, it's just to be on the safe side. She held her tight, she could feel her internal struggle.

"What if there is something wrong? What if I can't have kids?" Charlie whispered. Joey cupped her face in her hands, looking into her eyes. "Charlie, it's just to be safe. As Rachel said, and you can see it yourself, the scar doesn't reach down to your womb, it's just to look for scar tissue. After all, there's a little Beanie that will call this his or hers home for nine months!" Joey kissed away her tears. "I know, I'm just scared. I hardly ever think about the scar or the injury any more. I didn't think it would be an issue at all…" Charlie sighed, "Well, we better get this over with, after all, we're leaving town tonight. She gave Joey a kiss. "Thank you for being here!"

Joey smiled and kissed her back, "I'm always here for you!" She unbuttoned the rest of Charlie's shirt. They both looked down on the scar. It started where the sternum ended and continued down to her bellybutton. It was white and narrow, with tiny scars from the stitches on each side.

Joey leaned down and kissed it. "I love this scar, it reminds me that you're alive, and that I should treasure every day we have together." She cupped Charlie's face again. "I do, I treasure every single minute that I have with you!" She kissed her

* * *

"How did it go with Rachel today?"

"Well good to see you to, Rubs, I have missed you!" Charlie grabbed a hold of her sister and gave her a hug, before opening the trunk to put Ruby's suitcase in. They were in the city to pick up Ruby on their way to meet Joey's siblings. She opened the car door for her before she placed herself in the passenger seat. Joey started the engine and they took off down the road.

Charlie turned to face her sister. Ruby was intently busy with Jordan. She was rewarded for the attention with giggles and laughter. "He is so cute, I can't wait till he gets a brother or sister!" She looked at Charlie. There was something in her expression, "What…? Something wrong? Did Rachel say anything?"

"No, it's probably nothing, I just had to go through a catscan today, to look for any scar tissue that could make it dangerous to have a baby, it's just for precaution. You know, it's just that having a baby in there puts pressure on the organs, and if there's scar tissue, well that could cause problems." Charlie chewed on the inside of her lower lip.

"When do you get the results?" Ruby was worried, she knew how much they wanted another baby, and that it would be Charlie carrying it."Rachel is calling us as soon as she knows. Hopefully tomorrow." She was interrupted by her phone ringing. "It's Rachel," She turned and answered it. Ruby and Joey found each other's eyes in the rearview mirror. They saw the concern in each other.

"Yeah… OK… Thank you Rachel." Charlie dropped her phone. Joey glanced over at her. Tears was forming in the corner of her eyes. Joey pulled the car over, stopped and loosened her seat belt. She turned to face her. She lifted her hand and placed it on Charlie's cheek. "What did she say?"

Charlie started to sob, "I… it's… They…" She couldn't get the words out. "Hey, come here!" Joey pulled her in, placed her head on her shoulder. "It's OK, I love you!" Charlie heaved for air a few times. She lifted her head and looked into goldenbrown eyes filled with concern. She cupped her face and gave her a kiss.

"It was Rachel, she pushed for the result, there's nothing wrong! We're cleared to go ahead!" she kissed her again, a deep, passionate kiss. Ruby turned her head and blushed, she was used to them kissing and touching, but having them doing it twenty inches from her face was a little bit too much. She smiled to herself, she was trilled for her sister.

Joey let her hands entwine in Charlie's hair, forgetting where she was. Charlie sneaked her hand behind Joey's back, letting it slide down to her butt. "Ehm, seriously, get a room!" Ruby interrupted them with a grin. They pulled apart, giggling, "sorry Rubs, I kind of forgot that you're here… I'm just so happy!" Joey blushed a little.

"How can you forget me?" Ruby snorted, then a big smile broke out on her face, "I'm so happy, I can't wait to get a new Beanie! "She gave them both a hug.

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"This is so wonderful, think, we're going to have a little Charlie!" Joey laid half on top of Charlie. They had arrived to the city where Brett and Lily lived. They had decided to stay at a hotel, it would be too much to deal with both meeting Joey's siblings, and being with Brett all the time. They had found a nice, small hotel in the outskirts of town, a place where they could have a relaxing weekend at the same time.

"I think we should make a baby right now!" Charlie grinned at her, "I can't wait to have your baby, I want to give you a little Beanie, just as you gave me!" She put her hand behind Joey's neck and kissed her. "I'll make a baby with you any time you want!" Joey giggled, "and when you turn into a horny teenager, feel free to take advantage of me!" She lowered her head and found Charlie's soft lips waiting for her.

Joey let her mouth trace Charlie's jaw line out to her ear. She found her earlobe and started to play with it, causing Charlie to giggle and writhe under her. She let the earlobe go, and let her tongue play with her neck instead. Charlie pulled Joey's top off, letting her hands caress her back, she let her nails scrape lightly up and down her spine.

In one fluent move she rolled Joey under her. "I never get enough of you. I love you!" Charlie whispered. Joey pulled of her top and let her hands find the peaks on Charlie's breasts, longing for attention. They moved together, moaning and pressing closer, wanting to be one. Joey threw her legs around Charlie, gaining more contact. She grabbed a hold of her head, kissed her deeply. "I love you too… I want you all the time!" She managed to get the words out between kissing and moaning.

* * *

Joey woke, it was still dark outside, she checked the time, 4:47. She looked down on the woman sleeping on top of her. She had her head on her shoulder and a hand on her breast. She smiled, she never got tired of waking entangled with Charlie.

She kissed the top of her head, they were going to have a baby. She smiled to herself. Charlie would look gorgeous pregnant. She envisioned her at the different stages of pregnancy, yeah, she would look hot! She gave her another kiss.

Her smile left, today they were going to met her sister and brother. Brett had organized the meeting, all they knew was where and when to meet them. She sighed. She hoped they wasn't too colored by Lily, that they had their own opinions. They were young, hopefully they had an open mind too.


	35. Chapter 35

**Thank you for all you kind words as usual, I love to hear what you think about this story! I hope you enjpy this chapter:)**

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Joey paced back and forth, she was nervous. She took a deep breath, stopped and turned to Charlie, who was sitting on the bed with Jordan on her lap. She smiled. It wasn't the end of the world if her siblings didn't approve. She had Charlie and Jordan. Besides, no one could ask for a better sister than Ruby.

Joey let her eyes dwell on Charlie, she was still as beautiful as she was the first time they met. Her hair was a little longer, it cascaded down her back. Other than longer hair, she looked the same. She radiated peace, love and strength.

Charlie looked up from Jordan and caught her eyes, she gave her a broad smile and turned Jordan so he could see her. He laughed and clapped his hands. Joey couldn't help but laugh back, he was so cute. She sat down beside them, Jordan leaned over to be picked up. She smiled and caught him.

She placed him on her knees, studying him. He had dark hair, soft as silk. He had dimples, and his lips curled just as hers. He laughed at her, trying to get a hold of her hair. That was his new thing, tangle his fingers in long hair, specially Ruby's curls. It had been on more than one occasion that they had to come to her rescue and untangle them.

Charlie placed her arm around her shoulder, Joey turned her head and met her lips. "Charlie, I'm so happy, I'm really nervous about meeting my brother and sister, but in the end, my family is here. You, Beanie and Ruby, I could never ask for a better sister than her." She leaned into her embrace.

"Hey, is it safe to come in?" Ruby called from the other side of the door. She had learned a long time ago that it was necessary to announce your entrance. She had walked in on them a couple of times in the beginning, and some things are not meant for others to see.

"Rubs, come in," Charlie rose and opened the door for her. Ruby brushed her cheek as she headed straight over to Jordan. "Hey, Beanie, want to come to your aunt?" Ruby reached out her arms. Jordan immediately raised his, leaning towards her and laughed. Ruby picked him up. He placed his hands on her cheek, slapping her, she blew in his face in time with the slaps, causing him to have a giggle fit. He laughed even more as he saw that her hair was down, and before anyone could prevent it, he latch on with both hands.

"Beanie, let go! Help me!" Ruby tried to get him lose. Jordan laughed even more as she squirmed and pulled faces. Joey jumped up from bed and rushed over to help, Charlie came to her rescue too. "Get him out of there, I can't believe I forgot to put it up. I think I should have it all shaved off!" She giggled and groaned at the same time. Charlie got him lose from her hair, found an elastic and pulled her hair to safety.

Finally free, and Jordan calmly settled in her arms she turned to Joey. "Ready for the big meet?" Joey nodded, "Yeah, I think so, I'm nervous though," she giggled a little, "I don't want to meet two new Lilys, but I guess I have to give them a chance…" She looked at Ruby with Jordan in her arms. "Ruby, No one can ever replace you as my sister, you will always have first place. I might have two brothers and a sister, but neither of them has been there for me like you have. Brett might be, or starting to be a new man, but he will never have the same place in my heart as you have." Joey walked over and gave her a hug.

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They parked outside the restaurant, Joey fiddled with the hem of her jacket. Charlie placed a hand on top of hers. "Don't worry, it'll be fine. We can do this!" Joey looked at her, gave a crooked smile and nodded. "Well, I guess it's better to jump in it, than crawl…"

They entered the restaurant. Charlie with her arm around Joey, closely followed by Ruby with Jordan in her arms. It was a nice restaurant, they stood in the reception area, waiting for a waiter to show them to their table.

"Follow me!" A smiling waitress came over to them, "The rest of the company is already awaiting." She walked in front of them to the back of the room. Two people rose from the corner table.

Joey grabbed a hold of Charlie's hand. She saw the two teenagers nervously looking at them. Joey took a deep breath, "Hi, I'm Joey, your sister." She stretched out her hand to the girl. "Eh… I'm Tara, and this is my brother, Tom." She motioned to him. Joey was quick to give him her hand.

"I don't know what Lily has told you, but this is my wife, Charlie." Charlie reached out her hand and greeted them. "This is Ruby, Charlie's sister and our son Jordan." They all shook hands, feeling a little awkward. The waitress came with a highchair for Jordan, creating a welcome distraction.

"So Tara, Tom, tell us about yourself!" Joey tried to get the conversation going. "Ah… Well, I'm eighteen, Tom is sixteen. I'm a senior, I like boats and the water. I don't get to be much out on it, this isn't exactly next to the ocean, but I go out to the coast twice a month, sailing. I love it, I wish I could do it for a living. Sailing around the world, like the Volvo ocean race… But that's just a dream." Tara couldn't hide her excitement when she started to talk about sailing.

Charlie studied her as she spoke. It wasn't hard to see that she was Joey's sister, even tough their colors was completely different. Joey had dark hair and brown eyes, Tara was blond and blue eyed. The shape of her lips were the same, the curve that make it look like there always was a smile lurking in the corner. The love for boats was also a tell tale sign.

She looked at Tom, he was a typical adolescent, his body parts didn't seem to fit together. He was skinny, broad shoulders that looked too broad for his back, long arms, and he just didn't seem to have full control of his limbs.

"What about you Tom?" Joey addressed him. "Ehh… I'm not into boats, "He blushed, glancing at his sister. "I guess I'm the typical guy, soccer, computer games, sports, I like running… How can you be married to… to…?" He blushed even more. "How can I be married to Charlie?" Joey finished for him. He nodded. "You don't beat around the bush, do you?" Tom became even darker red. He stared into the table.

"What did Lily say about me?" Joey wanted to know where to start. "She didn't say much," Tara answered. "She told us you wanted to see us, and that we had to be prepared, because you were 'alternative' as she put it. So I called Annie, and she told me the whole thing, and I told Tom."

"So, are you guys OK with it, I mean Lily didn't exactly take it very well. "Joey leaned closer to Charlie, she was nervous for the answer. Charlie found her hand and gave it a squeeze.

"Mum is very religious, I think she found some kind of peace in it. I knew that she had kids before us. When I was around twelve I found a picture of you and Brett. I asked who they were, she told me that it was her kids from before, but you were gone. I assumed you had been killed in an accident or something. I figured she found something in her religion that made her able to cope with it. I was kind of shocked when Brett showed up, and now you… " Tara stared at Joey. "I suddenly has a whole new family, a sister, I always dreamt of having a sister… " A tear escaped her eye, she stared down at her hands.

Joey waited for her to continue, when she didn't, she decided to tell about Charlie and her. "To answer your question Tom, I'm gay, and Charlie and I are legally married. We have been together a little more than six years, married for nearly three. We live in a small town called Summer bay, it's about five hours drive from here. Charlie is a sergeant, and I'm a skipper. We have Jordan, He is a little more than six months old." Joey looked at them to see their reaction.

"Eh.. That's cool... How is it to be a cop? I have been thinking about taking that way, was it hard to pass the physical test?" Tom seemed to have forgotten about his question and turned all his attention to Charlie.

Charlie giggled and smiled, Tom seemed like a straight forward, nice guy. "Well, you have to be quite fit, it's a lot of hard work, but if you work out regularly, and you say you play soccer and you run… It sounds like you have a great starting point." She looked at him, you could tell that he and Joey was related, but it wasn't as obvious as with his sister. "I was shot though, a couple of years ago. When Joey got pregnant I figured I wanted to do something else, so for the time being I have a year leave, and I'm not sure what to do yet."

"You got shot? Can I see the scar?" Tom was big eyed. Charlie giggled at his fascination. "I was shot in the gut, and this is not the place to show it off. " He looked disappointed. "I was shot in the head too, the scar is hidden in my hair, but if you lend me your finger you can feel it." The fascination in his eyes were back. He leaned closer and let Charlie guide his finger to the scar.

"Wow, that's cool!" He exclaimed. Charlie kept his hand in hers, "So you are OK with us, me?" Charlie wanted him to be for Joey's sake and for hers, she already liked the boy.

"Yeah, I mean, I don't know any gay people, but you're cool!" He smiled at her. He envied Joey a bit, he really liked Charlie, and she was good looking, he felt all the teenage hormones rush around in his body. Charlie smiled at him and gave his hand a squeeze before she let him go.

"What about you Tara?" She looked at the young girl. "You know, I'm sorry that Mum has such a problem with you, but she has never forced any of her religion on us. I'm cool with it, you both seem like nice people. You have a beautiful son, I don't see why I should have a problem. It would be really nice to come and visit though, get to know you a little better, but I don't know if Mum approve…"

"You are very welcome any time! I could take you out on the Blaxland, we could surf, not that I'm very good at it, but I have been surfing with VJ for quite some time. I'm sure we can dig up a sailboat for you. After all we live in a bay!" Joey smiled, she was positively surprised by her siblings.

"Yeah, anytime!" Charlie agreed, "I'm sure I could show you a trick or two, Tom. We could do some work out together." She smiled at him. this seemed to work out great.

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"Thank you for the dinner, and really, you should come and visit us, you are welcome any time!" Joey gave Tara and Tom a hug, Charlie did the same, and Ruby followed their example. They got in the car and waved goodbye.

"Wow, who could believe that Lily is their mother, I'm so glad that kids doesn't have to adopt their parents opinions. Tara and Tom are really nice." Ruby relaxed in the back seat. Charlie and Joey looked at each other. "Yeah, it was really great," Joey giggled, "I think maybe Tom got a little crush on you!" She turned to Charlie," He found you utterly fascinating!"

Charlie giggled, "I saw that, it was kind of cute." She grabbed Joey's hand. "I'm so glad this worked out so well. They are lovely people, I look forward to get to know them better!"

"Yeah, me too, but no one can replace the family I have, the people that has been, and still are, there for me. You, Jordan, Ruby, Leah, Aden, Morag…Tom and Tara is an addition, and there's place for them too." Joey turned and looked at Ruby, "Ruby, I just want you to know, I have said it before, you are my true sister, Tara and Tom might be blood, but you are love!"


	36. Chapter 36

**Thank you again for all your kind words, I'm trilled that you still like this story, hope you enjoy this chapter too:)**

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"I can't believe Lily let them come, I thought she would be afraid that we would infect them or something!" Joey snuggled up to Charlie, they were sitting in the grass by the bus stop, waiting for Tom and Tara. Charlie giggled, "Well, if we can infect them with our happiness and love, it wouldn't be a bad thing!" She placed a kiss on her lips. Joey snuck a hand behind her neck, not wanting the kiss to end. They didn't hear a car stop next to them.

"Ehm, "The sound pulled Charlie and Joey apart. They turned to the sound and found themselves looking up at a grinning Rachel. "Hi girls, sorry for interrupting…"She giggle. "I saw you, and since I have news for you I figured I should interrupt you. I think you will like…"

Charlie and Joey scrambled to their feet. Rachel looked like she was about to burst. "What?" Joey was curious. "Well, I just got a call from the spermbank, they have set you up to do the procedure in two weeks!" Two weeks? Really? We're going to have a baby? Charlie we're going to have a baby! Another little Beanie!" Joey flung her arms around Charlie, who was standing frozen to the spot.

Feeling that Charlie was immobile, Joey let her go and looked at her, Rachel took a step closer. "Are you OK…?" Rachel put her hand on her arm. Charlie was staring straight ahead, but not seeing a thing. Joey put a hand on her cheek, stroking it with her thumb. "You know, if you don't want to, or if you think it's too soon…"

Charlie returned to the present. "What? No… It's just that… I have wanted to do this for so long, even when I was a teenager I dreamt about being pregnant, wondering what it felt like, having a baby growing inside… Now that's going to happen, I'm so excited! Two weeks from now, and that dream will come true!" She whipped away a tear that had found its way down her cheek. She cupped Joey's face and kissed her. "The best thing is that it's yours!"

Rachel looked at them. She was so used to them kissing and touching, they amused her, and she was happy for them. She was really happy that she could help them make their dream come true. They did an excellent job with Jordan, she knew that the new baby would get the best family anyone could have.

"This means you can be the midwife this time too, "Charlie threw her arms around Rachel, "You are what, four months pregnant?" "Actually twenty weeks, so I'll have mine long before yours come along, I would love to be your midwife!"

"Rachel, if you don't have plans for the evening, why don't you and Tony come over for dinner? I'm making bouillabaisse. Tom and Tara is coming, that's why we're here, they'll arrive with the bus. Leah and Robert is coming, Morag is popping by, she is at Alf's at the moment. Martha and Hugo will be there, and of course Aden and Ruby." Joey wanted all their family and closest friends to meet Tom and Tara.

"Wow, that's a lot of people, you know Tony would kill me if I turned down an opportunity to have your 'fishy soupy thing', but where are you going to seat everyone?" Rachel envisioned their kitchen and living room.

Joey looked a little thrown, she hadn't thought about that. "I know, "Charlie broke in, "It's a lovely day, it's nice and warm, why don't we have it outside. I'm sure we can ask Alf to borrow tables and chairs from the Surfclub, and maybe Leah can help us cook."

"I ask Tony if he can get Robert, and they can take care of the seating arrangement, it won't hurt them to work for the food!" Rachel smiled, turned to her car, picked up her phone and was ready to dial. "See you tonight then, seven?" Joey gave her a quick hug before she left.

Joey turned to Charlie and put her arms around her waist. Charlie rested hers on Joey's shoulders. "We're going to have a baby!" Joey kissed her. Charlie nodded, "a little Beanie!" She grinned. "I think we have to find another nickname for this one, we can't have two Beanies. " She let her arms tighten around Joey's neck, holding her in place so she could really kiss her.

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"Dinner yesterday was wonderful, I's so glad Mum let us come, even though it's just for two nights." Tara relaxed at the breakfast table. "It's so nice to be here, meeting your family, but I have to say Morag is kind of scary, I'm glad her brother was here too, he made her not quite so scary."

"I know, she was my layer, she scared the living daylight out of me in the beginning, but when you learn to know her, you find a warm and loving lady under there. "Joey explained as she fixed breakfast.

"I really like Leah, she is so sweet, I totally get why she's your mother of choice. I would like to have her as a mother too…" Tara got lost in her thoughts. Joey looked at her when she returned to the table, Tara stared out the window, she had her hand under her chin. She sighed.

Charlie came into the room with Jordan. Tara woke up from her thoughts and smiled as she saw him, "You want to come to your aunt?" She lifted her arms to invite him to come to her. "You might want to put up your hair first," Charlie walked over, "Beanie has developed a taste for hair, he'll latch on and never let go, just ask Ruby, he loves her curls." Tara quickly made a bun of her hair and took Jordan. Her eyes followed Charlie as she went over to Joey, she blushed a little when she saw them embrace each other and share a kiss.

"Don't worry, you get used to them, "Ruby's voice made her spin around. Ruby was smiling at her. "Believe me, they get much worse!" She giggled.

"It's not that… it's just nice to see them so happy, and I'm not used to see people showing so much affection, my parents never do… It's nice…" She glanced at the couple wrapped up in each other.

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"So, what's on the agenda for today?" Aden sat next to Ruby, devouring his sandwich. "I thought we could take the 'Blaxland' out, have the day on the sea. Leah has agreed to take Jordan. It's a beautiful day, I think it would be great." Joey grinned, she always loved to take people out on the sea, letting them share her enthusiasm.

"Ehh…I…" Tom stuttered, "I'm sorry, I don't like being out on boats, I get seasick just looking at a puddle. I don't want to ruin your day, but…" He blushed, feeling a little stupid for revealing his weakness. "Why don't you and I hang out for the day, you know, do guy stuff. Then the girls can have the day for them self, talking girl stuff." Aden offered. He liked Tom and didn't mind spending time with him.

Tom brightened up, "Yeah, that would be great!"

* * *

Joey and Charlie had reclined on the sofa in the stern. They were snuggling together, studying the two girls steering the boat. "Tara is really good with boats, I think she would be a great racer if she had the opportunity to develop her skills." Joey said thoughtfully. "You're probably right, and it's good to see that Ruby and she get along so well." Charlie turned her head and looked at the face of the woman resting in her arms. "And it's great that you don't have to steer the boat, because that means I can get along with you!" She grinned and let her mouth find Joey's.

---

"Don't mind the two of them, they're always like that. Whenever they get a chance, they're all over each other." Ruby giggled, Tara had trouble taking her eyes of them. "I remind them that we're here if they get to bad, they have a tendency to forget where they are." Ruby tried to lighten the tension she felt from Tara.

"I don't mind…" Tara paused, "It's just that I have never seen…"

"seen two women in each other's arms?" Ruby finished for her. Tara blushed and turned to face the sea. She was nervous. Ruby looked at her, noticing the shaking hands on the steering wheel. "If you find it difficult, I can go and…"

"no" Tara interrupted her. "It's not that. I just have never seen anybody as happy as them, I didn't know that you could have a relationship like that, not if you're… if you're gay." The last part came out in a whisper.

A light started to dawn on Ruby. "Do you know any gay couples?" She studied Tara's face, she shook her head. "No, I have just seen parades and stuff like that… Joey and Charlie… well they are so normal, like any other couple. I didn't know it could be like that." She continued to study the horizon. Suddenly she turned to Ruby, "How do you know if you're gay? I… I…" Tara's courage left her, she stared into the floor.

"You should ask Joey and Charlie that. Charlie is really good at explaining things, help you understand. I think she should become a counselor, but she doesn't see that herself. They are the right people to ask. After all they have a lot of experience in that area!" Ruby smiled, then became serious, "I can ask them if you find it awkward," She put her hand on Tara's. "You know, there's no shame in being gay!" She looked into Tara's eyes.

"Don't… please don't say anything… I don't know… I'm not…" Tara lowered her head, fiddling with the steering wheel. Ruby put her hand on her shoulder, "don't worry, I won't, but Joey and Charlie can help you. I understand that you're confused, that you haven't figured it out yet. If anyone know something about that, it's Charlie."Ruby giggled. "You should have seen her when she fell in love with Joey, talk about confused, and scared… She was a nightmare to live with, but she can tell about that herself."

---

They anchored up in a cove, the ocean was like a mirror. They had eaten lunch, and were sipping to a coke each. Charlie and Joey was snuggled up together on one sofa, Tara and Ruby seated in the other. Tara had her legs up on the sofa, her arms around her knees, staring out over the water. Her mind was full of questions.

Ruby looked at her and then to her sister, she took a deep breath. "Charlie, Joey, how do you know that you're gay?" Charlie looked up surprised, she didn't expect that question, Ruby knew a lot about that subject, they had done a lot of talking through the years, and Ruby had even studied the subject at uni.

Charlie looked like a living question mark. Ruby, motioned with her eyes to Tara, giving a little point with her pinky. Charlie nudged Joey, she too saw what Ruby did. They got the message.

Joey squeezed Charlie's hand, "First I have to say that I have found love, and even tough I was atracted to women, I'm only atracted to Charlie now. I found love, deeper, higher, richer than I thought possible!" She grinned at Charlie. "About finding out that I was gay, I kind of knew my whole life, I just didn't know what it was. I had my first experience with a girl when I was sixteen. I was unsecure and confused, I didn't have any one to talk to, so I had to figure it out on my own. When I got together with Charlie, a girl I went to school with told me that they knew I was gay back then. I just wish they had told me, it would have saved me from a lot of soul searching. On the other hand, that's not a bad thing, it's good to get to know yourself. Slowly I came to terms with who I am. I was attracted to girls. When I finally realized and came to terms with that, my life felt whole. It wasn't easy, but you can't pretend to be someone you're not." Joey studied Tara who was now staring intently at them.

"I can vote for that, "Charlie took over from Joey, "I tried to pretend that I was someone I'm not. It only led to heartache and stupid mistakes. When I met Joey, she did something to me. I liked her from the first time I met her. I wanted to be with her, help her, protect her. When Brett kicked her out, I wanted her to be with me. We became friends, I had feelings for her from the very beginning, but I didn't know what it was. When it dawned on me that I was in love, I freaked out. I pushed her away, I tried to deny my feelings. I was so scared of what people would think of me." She pulled Joey closer, it was hard to talk about that time, she wanted to feel Joey. Joey put her hands on her cheek, gently let her lips touch hers. "It' OK Charlie, you know that!"

"I couldn't believe I was attracted to a woman. I had never been attracted to a woman in my whole life. I was straight as an arrow, I thought. I was twenty six, and I freaked out completely. After a lot of agonizing and some stupid mistakes that almost broke us, I realized I really loved her. I tried to figure out what label fitted me. I couldn't. Joey was gay, it seemed so easy for her. I used to envy her confident in who she was. I didn't know what prize it came at.

In the end I came to the conclusion that I don't need a label. Labels are something other people put on you, so that they know how to judge you. I'm labeled as lesbian by the people around me. I don't care. In the beginning I freaked out because Brett painted "Queer" on my car. It was stupid of me, but I did. Now, I don't care, whatever rocks their boat. If they need to label me because they can't see me, go ahead. I know who I am, I know who I love. I love Joey, that's it. When I'm with her I'm a full-blown lesbian, but I don't look at other people, men or women. I don't want anyone but her, so I call myself 'Joeian'. "Charlie smiled at Joey, giving her a little peck on the lips. "But labels can be good too, because it tells you that you're not alone, there are other people that feels like you do!"

"Did it clarify anything?" Joey looked at her sister, a tear had escaped and ran down her cheek. "Are you OK?" Ruby placed a hand on Tara's arm. The touch made her break down, she buried her head in Ruby's shoulder and cried. Ruby put her arms around her and held her. Charlie and Joey looked at them, not knowing what to think.

"Tara, you can talk to us, we won't judge you. Charlie and Joey can really help you with this, and we won't tell anyone if you don't want us to. Ruby spoke softly to her. Charlie heard what her sister said, and she realized what this was all about.

She rose and sat down beside Tara, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Tara, Ruby is right. I have been through this, so has Joey, talk to us. We want to support you, be here for you, and we won't tell Lily." Joey sat down behind Charlie, wrapped her arms around her middle. "Tara, Charlie told me years ago, there's no shame in being gay. She was right."

Tara lifted her head from Ruby's shoulders, looking at them, "It's just… I don't know… I don't know if I'm gay… It's just… this girl…" She wiped her face, looking out over the water again. "I don't like guys… like that. I have a lot of boy-friends, but I don't want to be with any of them, we're just mates… this girl, she started in my class this year. We became friends, I really like her… like that. We kissed, I freaked out… I think she likes me, she told me she did. I treated her like shit after that, but still, she 's there for me, and I want to be with her, but I'm scared." New tears ran down her face."I can't be gay, I can't go there, my mother will kill me, just look at how she reacted to you."

Charlie pulled her into her chest and let her cry. Joey put her arms around her too, and the three of them sat tightly embraced.

"I wish I could come and stay with you," Tara whispered, "you are happy, you are true and you don't judge. I want to be like that. I want to be like my sister!" Joey felt tears burning in her eyes. She felt for her, knowing exactly what she went through, and she had compassion for the other girl.

* * *

Tara looked at the couple walking in front of her. They were walking down the beach, heading for home. She felt a lot better, it was good just to have people who understood her. Someone to talk to who had been through the same she went trough.

She wished sincerely that she could come and stay with them. She wanted to come to terms with herself, and she wanted a safe environment to do it in. besides, she loved the Bay. The water, boats… she started to dream. Boats, sailing, training, spending time with Joey and Charlie, learning about love, maybe Kate could come for a visit…

She was torn out of her daydream by Ruby elbowing her. "We're home, it looked like you were a thousand miles away!" Tara blushed, she started to say something when Tom and Aden came to greet them.

Aden walked right over to Ruby put his arm around her and gave her a short kiss. "So, how has your day been?" They all faced each other on the beach, just down from their house. Tara blushed and studied the sand. "We had a marvelous day, Tara showed me how to steer the boat, we ate and talked about girl stuff." Ruby smiled up at Aden. "Hm, what girl stuff?" Ruby punched him in the stomach, "What do you think girls talk about?" Aden laughed, threw his hands in the air, "I don't want to know!" Tara looked up and sighed from relief, they had told the truth, they didn't say anything, Ruby made everything so natural, like nothing had changed.

"What have you two done?" Joey asked Tom, He looked like he had a good time. "Well, first we went for a jog on the beach, or I jogged and Aden tried to follow me!" He looked at Aden a little triumphant. "That guy is so fast, "Aden punched Tom in his arm. "He called it jogging, but he was running flat out, seriously he should be racing!" Tom looked proud.

"After the little jog we went to the Surfclub, played some pool, before we headed to the Diner to get lunch. Leah joined us, she is really nice, and VJ. He took us surfing afterwards." He laughed a little. "It was difficult, it looks so easy when you watch, but doing it yourself…" He blushed.

"Wow, it sounds like you had a great day!" Joey was glad that he had enjoyed himself with Aden. She could tell that he was proud of his running. "So you are really fit then, I mean Aden is not a couch potato, so if you beat him, you're fast." Tom blushed even more, it was one of the things he couldn't control.

Tara giggled, "You know, he uses to do bench presses with the girls in his class, just to impress!" Tom glared at her. Joey laughed, "that's funny, I bet they get impressed too! What else do you do?" Tom gave her a cheeky grin," I think my sister needs to cool down!" He charged at Joey, in one swift move he had her up on his shoulder, ran down into the water and dumped her. Joey came up, trying to frown at him, but she laughed so hard that she didn't succeed. "I guess that's one of the things you do!" She walked up to Charlie and the rest that was laughing so hard that they cried.

Charlie looked at her, "You look like a drowned puppy!" She tried to control her laughter. "Oh you think this is funny?" She charged at her, throwing her arms around her and squeezed close to her. "Ha, now you're wet to!" She grinned and kissed her.

Tom stood shining, he had a lot of fun, he liked hanging out with Aden, he felt good about the fact that an adult man wanted to spend time with him. his father wasn't exactly making an effort to be with him, and it was good to have someone like Aden to relate to. He felt like he had the perfect day, he wanted to come back.

* * *

"So what do you think about Tara coming to stay with us?" Charlie laid in bed, whit Joey on her arm. Joey turned and faced her. "I don't know, I really like her, and I think it would be good for her to work through everything in a home where no one judges her, and where she have us to talk to… But Lily… She will blame us when this comes out, are we prepared to deal with that?" Joey was concerned.

Charlie kissed the tip of her nose. "I think we should invite her here for the summer, when she has finished school. She can sail, train, and maybe start to pursue her dream of racing. I really like her, and I think it would be great to provide a place for her to blossom… When it comes to Lily, what's the worst that can happen? That she won't see us?"

Joey giggled and let her finger run down Charlie's chest. "I guess we should do something about the loft, it sounds like it's going to be crowded here!"

Joey looked into her eyes, "You'll be pregnant though, do you think you'll be up for the extra responsibility?"

Charlie grinned, "No problem, it's not like she can't look after herself, and Ruby will be here. They can look after Beanie while you look after me!" She kissed her. "seriously, I would love to help her finding out who she is. I wish I had someone I could talk to when I fell in love with you. Someone that could tell me that it was the most beautiful thing in the world. That it wasn't anything to be scared of. That love is love and it doesn't matter what sex the receiver of your love is. If you and I can help her, I think we should"

Joey let her finger resume the wandering on Charlie's chest. "I'd love to have her here, and I like the idea of taking care of you!" She leaned in and found her lips, seeking entrance, their tongues played with each other.

"I think we should make a baby right now!" She playfully let her finger wander further down. Charlie giggled and rolled her over, giving herself the upper hand. "Absolutely, maybe we should make two!"


	37. Chapter 37

**Thank you for all your great reviews! I'm glad I'm able to keep this interesting, hope you like this too:)**

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"I still can't believe that Mum let me come. It's so wonderful being here!" Tara had reclined in one corner of the couch, Jordan was sleeping on top of her with his head on her shoulder. Joey was sitting in the other corner with Charlie leaning her back against her. Their feet's was an entangled mess.

"It's wonderful to have you here, and you're great with Jordan. You have only been here a week, but he has really taken to you." Joey let her eyes dwell on them. "We can take Jordan to his bed, he doesn't have to sleep on you, he'll get spoiled!"

"No, I like holding him, we never show much affection at home. We never hug or anything like that, this feels good. I think you are rubbing off on me!" She giggled. Ruby came in to the room with three cups of coffee. She gave one to Tara, and the other to Joey before she collapsed in a chair.

"Hey what about me? I want a cup too!" Charlie complained. "No, mama, you had your two cups, think of little Jarlie, it's not good for the baby if you have too much caffeine." Ruby frowned at her, trying to look serious. "I get you a glass of soda water!" She disappeared into the kitchen.

"Jarlie, so that's what you gonna call the baby?" Charlie called after her. Ruby reemerged from the kitchen with a grin on her face and a glass in her hand. She placed the glass on the table in front of Charlie. "Well, we already have Beanie, and we can't call this one Beanie, that would be confusing, so I figured Jarlie would do it, a little bit of Joey and a little bit of you!"

"How do you do it? I mean… how do you get pregnant? I mean… how do you organize it?" Tara was stuttering, she blushed.

"We understand," Charlie brushed her foot against Tara's. "Rachel has worked wonders for us. With Beanie, she talked to the spermbank, she organized everything. It wasn't easy, but she was persistent, and in the end we got the ok. This time it was much easier. Rachel has helped us this time too, she used her contacts from before, and nine weeks ago, we were called in, and well, there's a little Jarlie growing in here."Charlie placed her hand on top of Joey's that was already resting on her stomach. Joey grinned and kissed her temple.

Tara studied them. They looked so happy. She had been there for a week, and already she felt like a part of the family. She didn't believe that her mother had agreed to let her come for the summer, but she was exited that she did. It had been a busy week, they hadn't any time to talk yet. Charlie and Joey had been in the city to get Ruby. She had been a lot at a local sailing club, getting set up for training for the summer, it was just a lot going on.

This was the first evening the four of them had a chance to sit down and relax together. She felt completely comfortable, she felt surrounded by an atmosphere of love and acceptance. She smiled, looked at Jordan and kissed the top of his head. "I think maybe I should put him to bed. He has drooled all over my shirt, so I think I should get changed!"

Ruby jumped up and lifted Jordan carefully, "I'll take him, and you can go get changed." Ruby smiled as she saw the wet mark on Tara's shirt, "It looks like he tried to launch you!" Tara looked down and giggled. She went to get a new top.

"So mama, how are you feeling?" Joey caressed Charlie's face. "I feel wonderful, I just want some coffee!" She giggled. "It's amazing, I'm so sorry you got so sick, and I hardly get sick at all." She turned her head and kissed Joey's chin.

"I'm not sorry about that at all, I'm happy it's easy for you. You don't want to get as acquainted with the toilet as I did!" Joey put her index finger under Charlie's chin, lifted her head and found her lips, "I do hope you turn into a horny teenager though, that would be fun!" She lifted an eyebrow and gave her a cheeky grin.

Charlie flipped over so they were face to face. She let a hand cup on of Joey's breasts. She let her mouth find Joey's seeking entrance, their tongues met. They kissed deep, letting tongues play with each other, seeking into the warmth of each other's mouth, Charlie pulled slightly away, "You can't turn into something you already are!" She giggled and continued the kiss.

"Girls, you are not alone!" Ruby's voice drew them apart, they both breathed heavily. "Sorry Rubs… forgot…" Joey tried to get her body under control. They sat up, regaining their composure. Giggling like teenagers, they gave each other a short kiss. Ruby shook her head and sighed teasingly. She loved the fact that they were so into each other still, but she teased them about it never the less, one of the privileges of being a sister.

Tara came into the room again, she replaced herself on the couch. "I know we haven't had a chance to talk yet, but I have been working on a letter to Mum, and I wondered if you wanted to hear it before I send it. It's probably going to have consequences for you too, and I want to hear if you think it's ok…" Tara looked nervous.

"So I take it's a 'coming out' letter?" Joey asked.

"I know it's gutless, but I can't tell her this face to face. She 's going to hate me, but at least if I send it now, it's two months until I see her again." Tara had tears in her eyes.

"Are you sure? I mean it's only been three months since you told us that you were confused, I don't want you to rush this." Joey studied her, she was kind of surprised that Tara wanted to out herself to Lily so soon.

"Can I just read you the letter, and then we can talk?" Tara fiddled with the paper in her hand. All three of them nodded. Tara took a deep breath:

_Dear Mum!_

_First, I want to say thank you so much for letting me spend the summer with Joey, Charlie and their family. I have just been here a few days, and it has been really busy, but I already love them very much. Joey is the sister I always dreamt of and Charlie… I feel like we have a special connection. She is such a wonderful person, l really like her. I hope you someday realize what wonderful people your daughter and her wife are. _

_Ruby, Charlie's sister is really great, we get along so well. She has kind of taken me under her wing, and I like that. The rest of the people here in Summer Bay has welcomed me, and made me feel like I belong here. Leah is Joey's mother of choice and she has already included me in her big heart. Aden, Ruby's boyfriend, is an outstanding guy. He has this protective thing going on, watching out for his family and he has already included me._

_I'm writing this letter because I need to tell you something. I know that you are going to think that this is Joey's fault, it isn't. This is me, I have known for a long time, long before I met Joey and Charlie. I still struggle with this, there's so many thoughts crowding my head, it's hard to sort through them. _

_It's so good to be here, because I have the support of everyone. I can work through my issues, knowing that if I need to talk, if I have questions, Joey and Charlie is here for me. _

_They are so important to me now. I don't want you to jump in their throat when you get this. I need them, and I hope you put your daughter's welfare before your religion._

_I hope you can forget your point of view, and get to know Joey and Charlie. They are the most amazing people I have ever met, and it's really your loss if you don't get to know them._

_I guess you have a suspicion about where this letter is heading. I hope you finish it, nothing changes if you put your head in the sand. This won't go away. _

_So here it goes, I can't find any other way to say it… I'm gay._

_It's not Joey or Charlie's fault, this is not something you 'catch'. I fell in love last fall, with a girl in my class. I didn't even know that I had a sister back then. I was confused and scared, I still am. I'm trying to figure myself out, and being here, surrounded by love and support will help me tremendously. _

_I know you are in despair now, I beg and hope you can come to terms with this, and find not only one daughter, but two._

_Love Tara_

She looked up at them, unsecure. "That was a wonderful letter, and you're right, there is no other way to say it." Joey lifted her hand and touched her cheek. "Are you sure you want to do this?"

"I think so, me and Kate… well, we're together, or we were, but we agreed to see what happened over the summer, since we are so far apart. Seeing you and talking to you last time made me realize that you can be normal and be gay. That you can be happy, have a family, and still be who you are." Tara glanced at them. "I know Mum will take it out on you, and if you don't want me to I won't send this. I don't want to make life difficult for you."

Charlie put her arm around the girl's shoulders, "When we decided that we should invite you here, we knew that it might come to this. Tara, you have to do what is right for you. We are adults, we can look after us selves. Don't worry, we have faced much worse things than Lily!"


	38. Chapter 38

_AN/ I just want to take this opportunity ta give a sincere thank you to all of you who read this story. all your great reviews are really encouraging. I originally planed to end this story after chapter 5, then after chapter_ _11, and after chapter 16... well this story has taken on a life of it's own:) I still enjoy writing it, and I hope you enjoy it too. It has ventured far, and I hope you like the caracters I'm bringing into it, that I succeed at giving them life and make them interesting. _

_I figured that I had to introduse others, but at the same time keep it close to Charlie and Joey. I don't want this to be boring. If there's anything you want to see played out in this story, please tell me. There will be more baby and kid stuff, don't worry about that part;)_

_Thank you for reading, and I hope you'll enjoy!!_

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Joey looked at the woman sleeping beside her. She smiled, still at times she could hardly believe that this was real. Charlie stirred, but she didn't wake up, Joey grinned. She carefully placed a hand on Charlie's stomach. When she stood, you could hardly see anything, but laying on her back, there was a small bump, revealing that there was a life growing in side.

Joey let her hand slowly caress her. She was so beautiful, and being pregnant made her glow. Joey giggled to herself. Charlie had told her that she had a glow when she was pregnant, but she hadn't seen it herself. In fact she had never seen it, but then again, she didn't have many close friends that had been pregnant.

When she thought about it she figured that Rachel was the only real close friend she had seen pregnant, and she was radiant no matter what. Charlie was too, but there was an extra glow. It seemed like there was an inner light shining through her skin and eyes.

Joey pulled Charlie's top up, just enough to reveal the skin of the lower abdomen. Charlie stirred again. "I prefer to be woken by a kiss, not you eyeing my belly when I sleep!" She mumbled with a smile on her lips. Joey smile and obliged. She let her lips softly kiss the top of the little bump.

"Not there!" Charlie grabbed her hair, easing her up to eye level, "I want it here," She guided her down to met her lips. Joey smiled as they met, she let her tongue enter Charlie's mouth, exploring and enjoying the sweet taste and the warmth. Charlie met hers, their tongues caressed each others, filling them both with desire.

"I want you Honey, I want to feel you, love you, be with you!" Joey let her hand wander up under Charlie's top, reaching the wanted destination. She smiled. "Something is changing here!" She giggled. "Just so you know, I thought you were perfect the way you were, but I don't mind this!" She let her hand gently massage the breasts she was cupping. Charlie gave out a moan, placed a hand behind her neck and pulled her down to kiss her. Their tongues chased each other, dancing, playing.

Joey tore away from her lips, letting her tongue trace a path down her neck, letting her lips replace her hand. Charlie let her hands cup her head, guiding her between the two peaks, Joey let herself happily be directed.

She let her hand wander from her chest, down her stomach, again coming to a stop on the little bump, she took the time to caress the skin before she continued her quest. She let her hand find the center of her pleasure, applying firm strokes, making Charlie jerk at the touch.

Charlie rolled Joey over, placing herself on top. She stared into her eyes as she let her hand mirror Joey's. They were moving as one, eyes locked together, chasing the climax waiting for them.

---

"Now, that's a kiss to wake up to!" Charlie placed a little kiss on the skin of Joey's neck. She was resting on top of her. Joey turned her head and placed her lips on her forehead, she laughed softly, "My pleasure…really my pleasure!"

"We should get up, fix some breakfast, maybe we'll have time for a coffee on the porch before Beanie wakes up." Charlie lifted herself up. "I guess you're right, but I rather stay here with you!" Joey lifted an eyebrow and let her hands again find Charlie's breasts. Charlie giggled, "Don't you know that it's me that's supposed to be the horny teenager?" She lowered her head and brushed her lips with her tongue. "I know, I just thought I should help you! Seriously, I can never get enough of you, I want you all the time, and you look so gorgeous pregnant." Joey gave her a proper kiss.

"You know if you keep touching and kissing me, we'll never get up from here!" Charlie answered the kiss. Joey looked at her, relocated her hands to her butt, "That was my plan!"

* * *

"Good morning sleepyheads!" Ruby grinned at them from her place at the kitchen table feeding Jordan. They went over to the two, Joey placed a kiss on top of Jordan's head, he looked up at her with yoghurt around his lips. "I sure hope some of it ends up inside!" Charlie giggled and let her hand stroke his head.

"Yeah yeah, do it yourself next time," Ruby tried to look annoyed, "No, thank you, it's really sweet of you to take him, it was good to have a sleep in!" Charlie placed a kiss on the top of her sister's head. "Sleep in!" Ruby snorted, "Just for your information, you need to put more isolation between your room and Beanies, you were doing a lot of things and none of them was about sleeping!"

Charlie and Joey blushed, "Ehh… well… coffee?" Joey grinned and turned to the counter. They heard steps coming up the stairs and soon a sunny Tara appeared. "Morning girls, Isn't it a wonderful morning? I just had a run on the beach, I love it here. I ran into VJ, he is really cool, we are going surfing later. I can't believe I have been here two weeks already. I got the mail, I'll just go and have a shower!" She dropped the mail on the table and was gone.

The three of them was staring after her, "Ok, I guess she likes it here…" Ruby giggled. "Somehow I think you're right Rubs." Joey giggled. Tara looked really happy. She had settled into the family, bonding with all of them. It was good to have her there.

Charlie grabbed her cup of coffee, settling at the table. Joey came over with cereal, bowls and milk. She placed herself next to her. Charlie shuffled through the mail, an envelope addressed to Tara caught her attention. She put the other mail back on the table, holding on to this one. She lifted her head and looked at Joey, she slowly raised her hands and showed her the letter.

Joey understood who it was from, "God, I hope it's good news." She expressed what they all felt.

"Wow, that felt good, I love running on the beach, looking over the sea. I have such a good time here…" Tara came from the shower with a towel draped around her head. She didn't see the expression in their faces. Joey interrupted her. "Tara, there's a letter for you…" She handed it to her. Tara took it, she recognized the writing. "It's from Mum… I can't read this…" All color had drained from her face. She handed it over to Charlie. "Would you…?"

Charlie took the letter, looking at Tara who was leaning against the counter, staring out the window. She opened it and read it to herself.

_Tara_

_I have read your letter, and I have taken some time to think this over. You ask me not to blame Charlie and Joey, but I do. Because they have lured you into thinking that being… I can't even write the word… that you can be happy and normal. You can't, it's not normal, and it won't bring you happiness. _

_I agree, you need help, but not from them. I'm sorry it has come to this, but I have only two options for you. You come home and you start therapy to get out of this delusion of yours… or you are not welcome home at all._

_I know that your only option is to come home, that's why I seem to be so harsh. It's only for your own good. I know that Charlie and Joey has welcomed you for the summer, but I also know that they won't be there for you in the long run. _

_I do love you, and I only want what's best for you. You are only eighteen, you don't know anything. Listen to your mother, come home, and we'll get you back on the right track._

_Mum_

Charlie looked up, seeing three pairs of eyes staring at her. She swallowed to get rid of the lump in her throat. She looked down at the letter, her hands were shaking. She didn't want Tara to know what her mother had said. A tear dripped down on the paper. Joey reached out, eased the letter out of her hand and read it.

"Tara, can you excuse us a second, Charlie and I need to talk. "Joey rose after finishing the letter. Tara nodded. Ruby looked at them with concern in her eyes.

In their bedroom they embraced each other, both of them hurting for Tara. "I can't believe this, "Joey started, "She sounds just like Brett did. How can she do this to her own daughter?" Joey sat down on the edge of the bed.

"I know, I can't believe it either… but we knew it was a possibility." Charlie sat down beside her. "Lily doesn't believe we'll be here for her, but I want her to stay. I don't think Tara would want to return home. She is eighteen, she can decide for herself." Charlie placed a kiss on Joey's temple.

"I want her to stay too, if she wants to, she is my sister, she is lovely and I want to be here for her." Joey looked into Charlie's eyes. "That means we'll have two kids and two sisters in the house, " She smiled briefly, "Talk about family growth!"

Charlie grinned, "Well, I think it will be great to have her here, and she 's terrific with Beanie, she'll be a great help when Jarlie comes around!" She kissed her. They rose and went out to the kitchen again.

Charlie went over to Tara and put her arm around her shoulders. "I'm sure you already see what direction this is heading. Before you read the letter, we want you to know that you're welcome to stay, if you want to. We both love you very much, and we'll always be here for you." She finished with a kiss on her cheek.

Joey reached her the letter, Tara gave her a hug and walked out on the porch. Ruby followed her with her eyes before she turned to them. "So, I guess Lily didn't take it very well?"

"No, to sum it up, she called her sick, deluded, and if she doesn't change her ways, she's not welcome home." Charlie sighed.

"You are going to let her stay, you won't make her go back to her mother?" Ruby liked Tara, and she didn't like Lily.

"We talked about it, we knew this was a possibility when we invited her, If she wants to stay, we'll love to have her." Joey answered.

"I'll think I go and check on her." Ruby rose, handed Jordan over to Joey and walked out.

Tara was sitting on the stairs, staring over the sea. Ruby sat down beside her, picked up the letter and read it. She put her arm around Tara's back, pulling her into her side. "You know you are welcome to stay here. We love to have you, you're part of the family." Ruby lifted her other hand, stroking her hair away from her face and tucked it behind Tara's ear. "You don't have to go back there, you can stay, get to know yourself, become secure in who you are before you face Lily. You are not sick or deluded or anything like that. You can be happy, normal, but the way to that is not by pretending to be someone you're not. If you want to be happy, you have to be who you are." Ruby giggled, "Just ask Charlie!"

"I know, Charlie, Joey, you… you are all so supportive and loving towards me. It's like for the first time in my life I see what love is, being here with you… it's been the two happiest weeks of my life…" Tara supported her elbows on her knees, resting her head in her hands. She turned her head sideways to look at Ruby. "I don't know if I should laugh or cry. Mum has to be the most homophobic person in the world, and she end up with both her daughters being gay."

Ruby giggled, gave her a hug and pulled her to her feet. "It will be ok, in the end it's her loss."

"How are you doing?" Charlie rose from the table as Ruby and Tara walked in. "I guess… can I stay?" Tears were trickling down her cheek. Charlie walked over and embraced her. "Of course, for as long as you like!" She held her tight, letting her cry. Joey joined them, putting her arms around both of them. "You are my sister, this is your home too!" Ruby joined them, they all held each other for a long time.

"Which one of you is tugging my pants?" Joey felt someone trying to get a hold of her pants. She couldn't see, she was locked between them. "No, not me!" The other's answered in unison. They let go of each other, she looked down and saw Jordan beaming up at her. "Hey, we put you on the blanket, how?" They all looked at him in amazement. He let go of Joey's pants and started to crawl towards the door. Joey was quick to pick him up. "When did you start to crawl?" She laughed at him. "Our little Beanie has become mobile!"

She grinned and walked over to Charlie, "I guess we have to put up baby gates!" She let her lips find Charlie's, "Can you believe, he's crawling, it's seems like yesterday he was just a bump inside of me!" Charlie smiled at her, "and tomorrow Jarlie is crawling around and Beanie driving us crazy by running around, tearing down everything we have forgotten to put away!" Charlie put her arms around both of them, kissing her deeply.

Ruby elbowed Tara, "see, you can be happy and have a family, even if you're gay!"


	39. Chapter 39

**thank you for all your great feedbacks:) I love writing for you, and me:)**

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Tara was sitting on the beach, staring out over the sea without really seeing anything. Her mind wandered. She had been in the Bay for three weeks, it had been the best and the worst three weeks of her life. The first two weeks had actually been just good, the bad part came in week three, after the letter. She sighed.

She didn't understand her mother, maybe she found it easy to cut her off, because she had done it before? She didn't understand how her mother could leave Joey either. Actually, she didn't understand Lily at all.

She was so happy here, spending time with Joey, Charlie, Beanie and Ruby. She felt that Charlie and Joey were showing her what love really is. Not just love between partners, but also love between siblings, between parents and kids, between friends.

She already loved Joey as the sister she was. They were so alike, not only their features, but interests too. She found it somewhat funny that even though they had just found each other, they had some of the same gestures, they both raised their eyebrow the same way and they used the same little wave when they met people.

Charlie, Tara felt a connection to her. It was something she couldn't describe, it was like they always had know each other. She was like a sister, mother and friend, all at the same time. She felt safe and protected around her. With Charlie, it felt like nothing bad could happen. She loved talking to her. Charlie's experience of coming out was something she really felt like she could relate to. They had struggled with the same confusion of falling for a girl, worrying about how people and family would react.

Talking to Charlie made it so much easier to sort through her head, getting a hold of the end of a thought and wheel it in, it felt just like fishing. Charlie was a master to explain feelings and reveal thought patterns.

Seeing Charlie and Joey together made her realize that being in a relationship, being loved, was a beautiful thing. It was not just them, seeing Ruby and Aden together was the same thing, it just gave her faith in love.

Her mother and father never showed any affection towards each other, at least not when she and Tom was present. Neither of them showed affection towards them. Tara could count on one hand the times her mother had hugged her. Charlie and Joey were 'touchy, feely' people. They always touched each other, and they would put a hand on her arm, stroke her over the hair or give her a hug several times a day, Ruby was the same.

It was nice, she felt like she drank the attention, that her skin was soaking up the feeling of being touched. She had started to crave it. She often snuggled up with Joey or Charlie, or both like a little kid would, or she would hold Jordan, cuddling and holding him. It was as if she needed to fill a place that should have been filled up as a kid.

She knew if she had a choice between a relationship like her parents had and the one Charlie and Joey had, there was no doubt which one she wanted. She smiled to herself, Charlie and Joey showed that it was possible, that you could be happy, that you could find love.

She focused on the sea, her smile broadened. Not only did she find a family here, she got to do what she liked the most, sailing. Joey had contacted a local sailing club, organized a trainer and now she was sailing five times a week. She loved it. Being out on the ocean gave her peace, all other thoughts vanished, it was only her, the boat and the sea.

Her thoughts went to Kate, she missed her. She knew they had done the smartest thing, deciding to wait and see what happened over the summer. She wouldn't be back though, since her mother cut her off. She sighed, she would miss her, Kate was her first love. It has all been such a mess. They could have been together almost a year if she hadn't been so scared. The two months they had been together was also clouded by the fact that she hid it from her family and that where ever they went, she was scared that they would bump into someone she knew.

Now, when her family knew, they were too far away from each other. It seemed like the two of them were not meant to be. She shook off the thoughts. She was here, she was happy. She had a whole new family and she enjoyed every single day. There was a lot of shit, but there was also so much good.

She leaned back in the sand, enjoying the feeling of the sun, she was happy. Right there, all the bad things felt so irrelevant.

* * *

Charlie was sitting in Joey's lap out on the porch, back towards her. They were both resting their feet on the railing. Joey held her hand on Charlie's stomach. "How are you feeling Mama?" Charlie turned her head and placed her lips on her cheek. "I feel wonderful, it's kind of strange. You were so sick, there was no doubt that you were pregnant. I'm hardly sick at all, sometimes I wonder if I'm really pregnant." Joey giggled and let her hands wander up her chest, she reached her wanted destination, and gently let her hands cup her. "Are you in doubt now?"

Charlie gasped for air, and leaned her head back, "That feels so good, I'm so sensitive and a little sore. You touching me removes the soreness, and it just feel so good. I could sit like this forever." Joey smiled into Charlie's hair. She didn't mind providing relief for her wife. She remembered how good it felt for her when she was pregnant.

Her skin had felt almost like it was raw and her breasts had been sore. One of the best things for her had been when Charlie just held her, cupping her and with soft, light strokes massaged her. It seemed it was the same for Charlie.

They sat with their eyes closed, enjoying the feeling, listening to the waves breaking. Suddenly the soothing sound of the waves were disturbed by a loud cough. They jumped up, startled and slightly embarrassed. "As you were girls!" A smiling young woman looked up at them. "I take it that I have come to the right place!" She giggled. Charlie and Joey stared at her, still not recovered from the shock.

"I'm Kate, and I'm sorry that I show up without warning, but I didn't know your address or phone number. I just jumped on a bus, asked around and here I am…" She put her hands in the pocket of her jeans, smiling, waiting for a reaction.

Joey studied her, this was her sister's girlfriend. She was gorgeous, black, short, messy hair. Brown eyes, glittering with humor. She was about her own height, slender, with a beautiful body. The tank top revealed toned arms, and the tight jeans showed of the muscles in her legs. She had perfect full lips, drawn back in a big grin, revealing a perfect row of pearly whites.

"Ehh…Hi, sorry about that, we wasn't expecting anyone…" Charlie was the first to speak. "So you are Tara's girlfriend?" Charlie walked down the stairs followed by Joey.

"Well, I sure hope so, I've been pining after her for a month, and when Tom told me that she had told Lily… I figured she needed support… So… Here I am!"

Charlie smiled, it was impossible not to be smitten by Kate's bubbly personality. "I'm Charlie, and this is my wife, and Tara's sister, Joey." Charlie reached out her hand. Kate took one short look at it before she completely ignored it and gave her a hug instead. "It's not hard to tell that you're Tara's sister, just change the colors, and you could be twins!" She gave Joey a hug too.

Joey picked up Kate's duffel bag and led the way in to the kitchen. "Sorry Kate, Tara is out running on the beach, she should be back soon, can I get you something to drink? Coffee?"

Kate nodded. She looked at the couple, she had been amused when she came up to the house, seeing Joey with her hands on Charlie. This was obviously a couple that was secure in who they were. She already liked them. When Tara had told about her previous visit, she figured that she had been colored by the fact that they were the first lesbian couple she had met.

Meeting them for herself, the first impression told her that Tara had told the truth. "Kate, why don't you tell us about yourself?" Charlie came over with two cups of coffee, Joey joined them with a third.

"Well, I'm eighteen, I love to draw and paint, I'm going to art school this fall. I came out when I was fifteen, and unlike some, I have parents that supports me and love me. I met Tara when I started in her class last year, and I fell for her."

Joey smiled, she knew what that felt like. "I assume your parents now that you're here?"

"Of course, but they demanded that one of you would call, and that I should ask very politely if I could stay." She looked at them, suddenly feeling insecure. Here she came, barding in and not even asked if it was ok. "I don't have to stay here, I have money for a hotel. I totally get it if you don't want me here, I should have called, but…"

Charlie and Joey looked at each other and smiled. "You can stay here, but to warn you, it's the two of us, our ten months old son, Jordan. Charlie's sister, Ruby lives here and Aden, her boyfriend practically lives here too, and Tara. If you stay here you have to sleep up on the loft. Tara's bedroom is there, and there is one more, but that one is not completely finished. So you'll have to settled for that one, unless you sleep in with Tara?" Joey wasn't sure what she thought about that idea.

"I won't share with Tara, we have been together two months, but we have never… you know… " She blushed.

"Ok, the loft it is. It only lacks paint, maybe, since you're an artist, you would like to paint it?" Joey smiled, she already liked the girl.

"Hey good people, son and sister coming home, escorted by a proud uncle!" Aden shouted from the porch. They got to their feet as the trio came in. Jordan was sitting on Ruby's waist and when he saw the stranger, he hid his face and started to cry. Joey went over and got him. "Sorry about that," Ruby handed him over, "He is just tired, we have been out with him for hours. I'm Ruby bay the way." She stretched out her hand to the newcomer. Kate took it and introduced herself.

"Ok, this is a surprise! Tara's sweetheart, nice to meet you. You know my sister is a cop, so you better treat her well!" Ruby grinned to take the edge of, but she meant it too. She had taken to Tara, and she didn't want to see her hurt, again.

"No worries, I'll be nice, I promise" Kate giggled, she liked Ruby. The sound of footsteps on the porch made them all turn to the door. A smiling Tara came through the door and froze when she saw the girl waiting for her. "Kate!"


	40. Chapter 40

_AN/ 40 chapters people! Pop the champagne!! I have to say I never thought I was able to write a story this long…maybe I should write a book…. Hmmm…._

_Anyhoo, I celebrate by writing a little mush for a chapter or two… or four…Who knows? As I said, this whole story was supposed to be 5…_

_If I should put a title on the following chapter… or two…or… it has to be 'Summer of Love' with a twist or two or…? _

_I hope you enjoy and thank you for all your kind reviews!_

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Kate was lying on her back, staring up in the sealing where the two sloping sides met. It had been a marvelous afternoon and evening. She smiled at the thought of Tara's expression when she saw her. She had been shocked and finally able to move, she threw herself in her arms. It had been so good to see her again. They had a turbulent year behind them, but it had also been wonderful.

Kate thought back to the day she met Tara for the first time. She entered the classroom in her usual confident way, the boys had whistled and the girls had whispered. She didn't care. Her eyes fell on a beautiful blond girl in the back of the room. She quickly made her way over and found a seat next to her. She had introduced herself, their eyes met and there was an instant connection.

She had stolen short looks at her, seeing the long legs, slender waist, perfectly curved breasts, long neck and the cutest lips she had ever seen. They curled up in the corners, looking like there was a smile just waiting to break free. She was gorgeous.

Her mind wandered back to the present. Meeting Joey and Charlie had been special. She had never seen anyone so into each other as them. She considered her parents to be loving and affectionate, but these two easily out conquered them. They reminded her more of teenagers just fallen in love than a married couple that had been together for more than six years.

She giggled a little when she thought about the third degree Charlie had put her through. She had no doubt that Charlie would contact a cop mate and have them run a background check on her. Charlie was really protective of her family. She liked it, but she felt a little sorry for her father. Charlie had called to let her parents know where she was, and she had used the opportunity to question him too.

A gentle knock on the door interrupted her thoughts, Tara put her head in, "are you sleeping?" She whispered. Kate supported herself on her elbows, clearly showing that she was awake. Tara entered. "Can I… can I sleep with you?"She blushed, "I mean…"

"I know what you mean!" Kate lifted her covers and invited her under. Tara giggled and got into the bed. She lay down. Facing Kate sideways with her arm under her head. Tara put her arm across Kate's stomach. "It's so wonderful to have you here, thank you for coming!" Kate turned her head and looked at her, "I want to be here, I missed you!"

Tara looked at her lips and closed the small gap between them. Their lips met, she let her tongue gently find Kate's. The two girls kissed for a long time, enjoying the taste and the sensation the kiss gave them. Tara lifted herself and laid half way on top of her, intensifying the kiss. She let one hand inch its way over Kate's stomach, under her top, meeting warm soft skin. Kate let her hand wander up and down Tara's back, coming to a rest on her butt. Suddenly Tara pulled away from her. Breathless she laid down beside her. "I'm sorry… I can't…" She lifted her hands and covered her eyes. Kate rose on an elbow, took a hold of her hand, "It's ok, you sure make it difficult for a girl, but there's no rush!" She smiled at her. "Come here!" She lay down again, offering her arm. Tara placed herself in the same position she had started in. "Thank you, you are so good to me, I love you."

"I love you too!" Kate used her fingers to inch up Tara's top, "I just want to feel your skin…" Kate let her fingers play on her ribs. "I thought you exaggerated when you told me about Charlie and Joey, you weren't, were you?"

"No," Tara put her arm over Kate again, "They are just as lovely, caring, kind, fun as I told you. I have never met anyone like them. I think that my mother cutting me off might turn out to be the best thing that could happen. They have showed me more love in these few weeks than my parents has showed me my whole life."

"I really like them too, I've only known them for a few hours, but they are the kind of people you feel like you have known forever. I really like Joey, maybe because she reminds me of you." Kate smiled up to the sealing; this would be a great vacation.

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Charlie yawned and stretched, her arms didn't meet anything and she froze for a second, then she remembered that Joey had gotten up earlier, telling her to sleep in. It had been good, she felt completely rested. The ting that reminded her most that she was pregnant was that she needed more sleep than she had before. She smiled, got out of bed, found a robe and headed for the kitchen and one of her two allowed cups of coffee a day.

She was fixing the coffee as Tara came in from her morning run. "Morning!" Charlie turned and greeted her. "How was your run?"

"It was excellent, "She smiled at her before it faded, "Can I talk to you? I mean if you have time, It doesn't have to be right now, I'm sure you have plans, just forget it." Tara lost her courage.

"No, I have time, Joey is out with Beanie for a morning walk, I think Kate went with her. Let me just get some clothes on, we can talk out on the porch, get some fresh air at the same time."Charlie was amused, but wondering what this was about, if she wasn't mistaken, it had something to do with Kate.

"Thanks, I just have to take a quick shower, don't want to stink you down!" Tara smiled, blushed and ran off to the bathroom

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"So, what do you want to talk about?" Charlie looked at Tara sitting in a chair next to her. She had her feet up, and her arms around her knees. She had learned to recognize the position, she would always sit like that when she had something that was difficult to talk about.

Tara blushed and glanced at her, "I… god, I feel so stupid!" She buried her head in her knees. Charlie reached out and patted her back.

"I have never had sex," Tara mumbled into her knees. Charlie couldn't hear her, "Sorry, I didn't catch that, you never...?"

Tara lifted her head and looked at her, "you can laugh, I said I have never had sex, I'm eighteen and I have never done it." She buried her head again. Charlie was glad she couldn't see her face, she was smiling. "Tara, plenty of people haven't had sex when they're eighteen, you're not abnormal or something!"

Tara lifted her head and looked at her, Charlie was smiling, but there was no ridicule in it. "It's just that I'm scared, I don't know anything about it… I mean I know the ABC, from school, but that's… you know… boy and girl…" She blushed.

"Haven't your mother had 'the talk' with you?" Charlie couldn't believe that an eighteen year old girl didn't know more than just the facts. "Are you crazy? She would never talk about those things." Tara gave her a crocked smile, "Besides, if she did, she would have talked about boys and girls, and I… well I want to know about… you know…"

"Well, the only one I had 'the talk' with was Ruby, so I'm not overly used to talking about sex to teenagers…" Charlie felt her cheeks warm up. Her thoughts rushed around in her head to figure out what to say.

"First of all, it doesn't matter what sex you do it with, it's just as scary the first time no matter whom. I was scared to death my first time with a boy, I didn't even like it, I did it because I felt pressured, the guy said he would break up with me if we didn't. I thought I loved him, so I gave in. He broke up with me anyway. I was sixteen, I wish I had waited… I've had a few boyfriends, a couple serious, or at least I thought they were, but somehow they all cheated on me, or they wasn't into me. I felt pretty useless in the love department… And then I met Joey.

God, if I had been scared the first time with a boy, I was ten times more scared with her… She was so gentle, patient and loving. It turned out so much better than anything I have ever had with any guy." She looked at Tara staring at her. "it's not about which sex you do it with, it's about whom. It should be with the person you love, who make you feel secure. The one that listens to you, who doesn't pressure you. Don't do it if you feel you have to, wait until you feel ready, until you want to."

"It's just that I want to, but I'm scared. I know that Kate is more experienced than me… What if I can't… if I'm not…" Tara was deadly embarrassed, she wanted nothing more than for a hole to open in the ground she could disappear into.

Charlie chuckled, "I thought the exact same thing… Just do what feels natural, what your comfortable with, I promise you, your instincts will take over!" Tara glanced at her, her cheeks crimson red. "Thank you, I… I'm not ready to go there yet, but thank you for telling me… I'm so embarrassed right now, I don't know what to do with myself…"

Charlie placed a hand on her cheek. "It's nothing to be embarrassed about, everyone asks those question on one point or the other, you're just acting like a normal teenager!"

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Joey and Kate was walking down the beachside road with Jordan in his stroller. "It's really beautiful here, I have never had any relation to the sea, but I have to say that I like this!" Kate was walking and whirling, wanting to take it all in. "If it's ok with you, I would like to do a mural in the bedroom where I sleep, I would love to do something to repay for you letting me stay here!"

Joey smiled and nodded. Kate amused her, the first impression was right, she was really bubbly and she got excited about the smallest things. "Of course, whatever you like, it can't be worse than it is. I haven't seen any of your work, but I have faith!"

"I would like to surprise you… if that's ok?" Kate's eyes glittered. She would love to blow them away. "Yeah, whatever rocks your boat! But from one subject to the other, how's things with Tara?" Joey wanted to know.

"Well, I'm in love with her, it has been a lot of shit, but a lot of good too. We slept together last night, I mean just sleeping." She giggled, "She came in and she fell asleep on my arm. I think it's really good for her to be here with you, she is so much more confident now." She walked in front of Joey, turning and walked backwards, facing her.

"It's so nice to be here, hanging out with you guy's. I know a lot of gay people, but they are around my age. It's nice to see an establish couple like you and Charlie, it makes me believe that I can have the same!" She spun around and continued walking the right way. It didn't take long before she spun back, "I really like you, you remind me of Tara, I hope she'll find the same confidence, peace and self-esteem as you have!"

"I hope the same, it wasn't anything that came floating on a board to me, but I hope her being here at least can give her a foundation to build on!" Joey knew that the reason for her happiness was probably still lying in bed, sleeping. She slowed her walk as her thoughts wandered to Charlie in bed.

"Earth calling Joey!" Kate giggled, Joey had the goofiest smile on her face. She blushed,"Sorry my mind just wandered a bit…"

"Yeah, home to a certain missus I bet!" Kate shot a glance at her, "race you home!" she took off. "Hey. That's unfair, I have Jordan!" Joey called after her.

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"Can I cook for us tonight?" Tara came in to the living room, Charlie and Joey was relaxing on the couch. Beanie was in bed and Ruby and Aden was supposed to be back for dinner. Charlie looked up at them from her resting place. She was squeezed between the back of the couch and Joey. "That would be wonderful, She lifted an eyebrow, "That is if you can cook?"

"Actually, I make a wicked spaghetti Bolognese!" Tara smiled at them. Kate jumped up from her very relaxed position in a chair, "I'll help!" She ran after Tara into the kitchen.

"Do you think they manage to cook, or are they following our example?" Joey moved over on her side facing Charlie. "I sure hope they cook, Jarlie is getting hungry," Charlie gave her a cheeky grin, "I'm hungry too, but not for food!" She found Joey's lips. They let their tongues dance, seeking into the warmth of each other's mouth. Joey let one leg slip between Charlie's and her hand rested on her hip.

Tara nudged Kate, pointing to the couple enjoying each other on the couch. They chuckled and retreated into the kitchen. "Let's follow their example!" Tara stepped close to Kate, finding her lips. Kate pushed her backwards until they met the counter. They let tongues explore each other, taste and dance together. Their hand ventured over each other's bodies. Pressing closer, seeking contact.

Kate finally pulled away, heaving for air. "Tara, we got to stop!" Tara looked at her, red cheeked, just as breathless, "Yeah… " She turned her back to her, supporting herself on the counter. Kate came up behind her, put her arms around her waist. "Tara, it's just that I want you, but I won't push you. I just have to pull away before I go too far. You kind of turn me on…" She whispered in her ear, resting her chin on her shoulders.

Tara turned and faced her. "You turn me on too… It's just that I'm scared… I… I…haven't done it before…" She blushed, not only from the desire flowing in her body. "It's ok, I kind of thought so," Kate smiled at her and let her hands brush away the hair from her face. "I mean it, there's no rush!" She gave her a kiss. "Let's make this spaghetti of yours!"


	41. Chapter 41

**thank you for all your kind words, this chapters is short, but I hope it's sweet:)**

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Kate was working on the mural in her bedroom, it was almost finished. She had been outside, taking pictures of the view and she was transferring it to the wall. Pictures were spread on the floor around her and now she was sitting in a corner, putting the final hand on the piece.

She let her hand drop and looked out the window, the mural was a continuation of the view from it. She had been there almost two weeks, and her stay was drawing to an end. She didn't want to go, she had a marvelous time there. She wished she could stay longer.

She grinned, at least she would give Charlie and Joey something nice back for letting her stay. She was happy for Tara having a family like them. It did her tons of good. They had a marvelous time together. They had been out on dates, enjoying themselves in the Surfclub, walking in the beach and making out to the backdrop of beautiful sunsets. They shared Tara's bedroom, still just sleeping. Working with the mural meant that her bedroom was full of paint and smelled. So that was a great excuse for sharing.

She leaned back, supporting herself on her hands, she studied the painting. She was pleased with the way it turned out. Her attention was drawn away from it when she heard the door open and Tara put her head in. She grinned at her and patted the floor beside her. Tara grinned back and joined her.

"Wow, I think this is the best work I have seen from you, have Charlie and Joey seen it?" Tara let her eyes wander over the walls and ceiling. "No, I want it to be a surprise, they are so wonderful, and I want to give them this back." She let her eyes wander too. "I hope they are blown away, they haven't seen any of my work, for all they know I can be terrible and just have put some stick figures on their wall!" She giggled. "I can't believe I only have three days left here, I don't want to go, it's not like I have any plans for the rest of the summer…"

"You can ask if you can stay, I'm sure they don't mind." Tara didn't want her to go either.

"Yeah, but I think my parents want me home, and they think I have intruded long enough, as they put it: 'it's important not to outstay your welcome', I guess their right." Kate leaned her head back. "I haven't heard anyone in a long time, where did everyone go to?"

"Charlie and Ruby has some sisterly bonding time, which means shopping in Yabbie Creek, Joey and Jordan are at Leah's and Aden, I have no idea what he's up to." Tara grinned, "We are all alone, and we can do whatever we like!"

Kate turned her head and met Tara's lips. " Kate…I want to… if you want to… you know…" Tara looked at Kate. "Are you sure?" Tara nodded, stood up from the floor, holding on to her hand and led the way into her bedroom.

They stood body to body in the room, Tara's breath came in irregular gasps."I'm just nervous, but I want to, I wanted to since you came, I… I'm just scared." Tara blushed, glancing at her.

Kate cupped her face in her hands, gently she placed her lips on hers. Tara opened her mouth and invited Kate in, tongue meeting tongue, setting both of them on fire. They kissed for a long time, relishing in the feeling their lips and tongues created.

Tara pulled Kate's top off with shaking hands. She lost her courage and placed her hands on her waist. Kate did the same and eased her down on the bed, she let her lips trace Tara's jaw, out to her ear and down her neck.

"If I go too fast, you have to stop me, ok? I want this to be perfect for you!" Kate looked Tara in the eyes. She nodded, putting her hands behind her head and pulled her down to kiss her.

Tara let her hands wander to her back, struggling with the bra claps, but got it open. She lost her nerves again and returned her hands to her waist. Kate followed her example, shoved a hand under her and unhooked her bra. She pulled it down looking into her face before she lowered her head and let her mouth caress the skin she had reviled. Tara grabbed a hold of her head, pressing her closer, she moaned and writhed under her touch.

Slowly Kate let her hand wander down over her stomach, inching her way under the lining of Tara's shorts, coming to a stop on her hip. "Do you want me to? Her voice was hoarse from passion running through her body. Tara nodded and Kate pushed her hand further down. She jerked at the feeling of Kate's fingers touching her, she moved to meet her.

Tara let her hands move from Kate's waist, under her shorts, wanting to provide the same pleasure for her girlfriend. They moved together as one as they felt the dividing line between them melt away.

* * *

"What you two been up to today?" Joey looked at Tara sitting between Kate's legs on the stairs. They blushed."Eh… I've been working on the mural, it should be finished tomorrow." Kate grinned at her. Joey was sitting in a chair, leaned up against Charlie sitting next to her. Aden was sitting next to her again with Ruby on his lap.

"Oh, my trainer called today, he told me there's a regatta next week and he wants me as one of the crew. It's three days and it would be so much fun. Can I?" Tara suddenly remembered the call, and it was a great distraction from the question about what they had been up to.

"That sounds like a great opportunity, just be careful!" Joey chuckled at the expression in Tara's face. "And Kate, your parent's called me today, they want to come and pick you up Sunday. They wanted to see where you have been the last two weeks Charlie figured it was a payback for her questioning of your father."

"We invited them to come Saturday, they are staying in a hotel, but we have decided to do the 'fishy soupy thing'" "Yes!" Ruby interrupted. Charlie giggled at her. "So we'll repeat what we did when Tara and Tom came, we'll invite our family and friends and have the dinner outside."

"Yeah! That was so nice, and that dish is the best thing I've ever eaten. Kate, you really have something to look forward to!" Tara placed a kiss on her lips.

Joey giggled, "I guess I'll fix dinner, anyone care to help?" All raised. "I guess this will be a joint effort!" Joey led way into the kitchen. Tara grabbed Charlie's arm and held her back. She waited until the rest had disappeared in side.

"I just want to say thank you," Tara blushed. "For what?" "You know, talking to me, and stuff…" Tara was crimson red. A light dawned on Charlie. She giggled and pulled her in for a hug. "I hope it was, what shall we say, successful?" Tara giggled and nodded.

The dinner was made and consumed with joking and laughter, a food fight had barely been avoided between Ruby and Tara. They had all laughed until they cried. They had opted to have desert in the living room, watching a DVD. The tree couples snuggling up with their respective partners.

"This is nice, isn't it?" Joey whispered in Charlie's ear. It was nice to see all of them happy, enjoying themselves. "It is, but what do you say, shall we leave them to it?" Charlie turned her head, gave her a cheeky grin and placed a kiss on her lips. They got up from the couch, joined hands and headed off to the bedroom. Four heads turned surprised, and four faces grinned as they saw the direction they took.

"I think we might turn up the volume on this film, just in case!" Ruby had trouble controlling her laughter. "They are the oldest couple, but they are the one that can't control themselves!" all four of them laughed.

They watched the movie, it was fun, and they all had enjoyed it. After the movie had finished, they had gotten each a beer, and was sitting laughing and talking. Just having a good time. A knock on the door interrupted them. Ruby looked at her watch, "Who on earth comes around this time a night? It's 11:30!"

Aden got up to answer the door. He came back with a teenager following him. "Tom, what are you doing here?" Tara jumped to her feet. He looked at her sheepishly. "I'm sorry, I couldn't take it any longer, I ran away…" He stared into the carpet.

Ruby went to get Charlie and Joey. She knocked on the door, and heard a low answer from the inside. She carefully pushed the door open. The light fell on Joey who lay on her back with Charlie sleeping halfway on top of her. "I'm sorry, but I think you have to come… Tom is here."


	42. Chapter 42

**I don't know what the child protective service is called in Australia, so I call it just that... Sorry, this is a little sad, but good stuff is lurking on the horizon...**

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"Tom, does your parent's know you are here?" Joey came out of the bedroom closely followed by Charlie. Tom was seated on the couch. He shook his head. "Ok, I'm calling the police, I'm sure they have reported him missing," Charlie headed into the kitchen to make the call.

"Tom, why are you here? How did you get here?" Joey placed herself on the coffee table, facing him. Tom studied his hands, blushing, "I… I left yesterday… I hitchhiked here…" Joey jumped up, "God, you have to be crazy! That's dangerous!" Joey was shocked, the boy should have had more sense than to do something like that.

Charlie came back in from the kitchen, looking like she had seen a ghost. "They… he is not reported missing…" Joey stared at her in shock, "what? He left home yesterday, they have to be scared for him!" She turned to Tom, "Unless you have a habit of running away that is?" Tom shook his head.

"I talked to Watson, she is coming over, even if they haven't reported him missing, he's still a minor on the run." Charlie had trouble understanding why his parents hadn't reported him missing. "I guess we should call Lily…"

Joey nodded, "I'll do it, Tara, the phone number?"

Tara gave it and Joey dialed, she bit on a fingernail, waiting for an answer. A woman's voice came in the other end, "Hi, Lily, It's Joey, I just wanted to say that Tom is here, he…" She stared at the phone, the only sound that came from it was the busy signal.

She turned to the others, "she hung up on me…" She looked at Charlie, both shocked over Lily's behavior. "I'll guess we leave that part to the police?" She looked questionably at Charlie who nodded in response.

They both sat down on the table in front of Tom. "Tom, what happened, why did you come here?" Charlie looked at the boy nervously twiddling his thumbs. He lifted his head and looked at them. "Ever since we met you the first time, mum has been going on and on about how wrong and unnatural you are. I don't think you are, I like you… After our first visit here, it was so great, but she got even worse. Before she never used to say anything, or try to force her opinions on us.

Maybe she got scared, that you would 'infect' us, or something. Then Tara left to come here. I don't know why she let her, but she did. When Tara left, she got even worse, she would constantly badmouth you, I tried to speak up for you, but … Then the letter from Tara came… I found it and read it… I kind of had a suspicion that she wasn't into guys…"

He glanced over to Tara, "I don't care… you're my sister…I knew your best friend was Kate, so I told her… I guess the two of you are together…Like I said, it's cool…" Tara rose from the floor and Kate's arms and gave him a hug. "Thank you little brother, that means the world to me!"

Tom continued; "Dad got angry too, it was like something snapped in them. They yelled at me constantly, that I should have told them… I didn't know anything, and I wouldn't have said anything if I knew. They were on my back all the time, questioning me, I couldn't take it anymore. If I tried to talk back they got so mad, and yesterday… Dad beat me with his belt." Tears were forming in his eyes.

"Let me see!" Charlie pulled him to his feet. Tom stared into the floor, "Where did he hit you?" She placed her hand under his chin lifting his head to make him look at her. "My… my back," He whispered with closed eyes and tears running.

Charlie turned him around, pulled his jacket off and saw bloodstains on his shirt. She pulled it up and gasped as she revealed several lesions running across his back. Joey saw them too, "Tom, we have to take you to the hospital, we have to get that checked out! Let us just get dressed, oh Ruby call Watson and ask her to meet us there."

Charlie and Joey rushed into the bedroom, throwing some clothes on. Joey had trouble getting dressed. Charlie saw it and put her arms around her, she was shaking. "Honey, it'll be fine!"

"I know, it just remind me about when I was sixteen… I'm so sorry that Tom's dad did that to him. No one disserves to be treated like that." Joey held on to Charlie, trying to recompose herself. She took a few deep breaths, loosened her hold around her, "Let's get him to the hospital!"

They reemerged from the bedroom, got Tom and headed towards the door. "Can we come?" The question came from Tara. "I'm sorry guys, I think it's best if it's just us, besides you have been drinking, and don't worry, he'll be fine!" Charlie talked over her shoulder on her way out. Tara stood back, knowing they were right, but hurting for her brother. Kate put her arms around her. Ruby and Aden did the same. The last thing Charlie saw before she went outside was the four of them comforting each other, she smiled a little, Tara was in good hands.

* * *

Rachel stood in the reception of the hospital looking through some file while stretching and rubbing her back. She was very pregnant and her back hurt. On top of it all she had to step in and take a nightshift. She hoped it would be a quiet one, maybe she could steal a couple of hours sleep later.

"Rachel!" Watson's voice startled her. "Has Charlie and Joey showed up?"

"No, should they, is something wrong?" Rachel got worried.

"No, they are fine, Joey's brother turned up at their place, and Ruby called and told me to meet them here." Watson had gotten very little information from Ruby. "Apparently he ran away from home, but he has not been reported missing…"

Charlie and Joey, with Tom dragging behind interrupted them. "Rachel, thank God, you're here, you have to take a look at Tom!" Joey was revealed to see the familiar face. She still didn't like hospitals, but Rachel always made it ok.

Charlie stepped over to Watson and let Rachel lead the way. "We called his parent's, but Lily hung up on us. Georgie, his father has beaten him, you need to make a report." Watson nodded.

"So, what's going on?" Rachel motioned for Tom to sit on the bed. He sat down, looking away from her. "His father used a belt and hit him over his back, it looks pretty bad," Joey answered when he didn't say anything.

"Can you take of your jacket and shirt so I can have a look?" Rachel flipped through some papers and started to take notes. Tom slowly removed his jacket. Rachel saw the blood stained shirt. "That bad! I'm sorry, we have to take pictures of this, this is abuse," She opened the door and called for a nurse.

"I don't want to make a big deal out of this." Tom fiddled with his jacket. Joey placed her hand on his, "Tom, this is a big deal."

Rachel was shocked by the state of Toms back. She had seen a lot of abuse, but she never got used to it. Tom was lying on his stomach on the bed, hands under his head while Rachel and a nurse attended to his back. "Sorry Tom, this is going to hurt, there are some filth we have to get out." Rachel could feel the boy flinch as she cleaned out the wounds.

Joey sat by his head and held his hand. She saw that he tried to be brave, but some tears were escaping his eyes. Charlie stood with Watson, she was in her 'cop mode' assisting Watson with comments, notes and telling everything she knew.

"Ok, that's it!" Rachel put her hands on the small of her back and stretched. "You have to get the dressing changes every day for the next three days, I write up a report and send to your local doctor." Rachel put a hand on his arm. "Tom, this is a case for child protective service. You're sixteen, but you're still a child!"

* * *

"What are we going to do?" Joey lay on Charlie's arm in bed. They had arrived from the hospital. Tara, Kate, Ruby and Aden had been waiting for them. Tara and Kate had fallen asleep in each other's arms on the couch. Ruby and Aden had been in the kitchen, having coffee and talked. They had given them a quick update before they all went to bed. They had put Tom in with Jordan.

"I don't know. He can't go back there. I can't let him, not after this." Charlie sighed.

"No, he can't, but we don't have room, this isn't the biggest house in the world, and we are already seven people here." Joey snuggled closer to Charlie, she worried about Tom, and seeing him beaten woke up memories. She just wanted the security and comfort being close to Charlie gave her.

Charlie held her tight, she knew what was going on in her head. "Maybe we could talk to Leah? It won't be forever. When school starts again Ruby will leave and that means that the two of them won't be here, other than the weekends. There will only be four of us."

"Until little Jarlie comes and joins us!" Joey placed a hand on Charlie's stomach. The bump had become a little more obvious.

Charlie smiled, "Let us just go to sleep, we can't fix any of this right now, let's deal with it tomorrow!"

* * *

Leah was sitting on the porch with a cup of coffee, listening to Charlie and Joey telling about Tom. She was mad as a hornet. She wanted to hunt Lily down and really make her pay for what she put her kids through, that woman did not disserve to have any.

"We don't want him to go to a hostel or anything like that. We don't know how this is going to work out, but if he could stay with you… it's close to us, VJ and Tom get along great. He can be here all the time, we just don't have room."

"Of course he can stay with us, no problem, I love to have him!" Leah didn't have to think twice. They were interupted by the sound of two girls laughing.

Tara and Kate came running up from the beach. "Morning Leah!" They greeted her simultaneously.

"Morning girls, how was your run?"

The two girls blushed and glanced at each other, "It.. it was good." Kate gave them a big grin, took a hold of Tara's hand and ran inside. Leah stared after them, a little bewildered. Joey and Charlie chuckled. "Let's just put it this way, they have discovered a whole new way to enjoy an early run on the beach!" Joey giggled.

A car came to a stop in their driveway, Watson jumped out and came to join them. "I just thought I fill you in before I head home for a few hours sleep."

"Coffee?" Charlie offered, Watson nodded and she went to get a cup.

"Tom is still sleeping, do you want me to get him?" Charlie reemerged with the coffee. Watson gratefully received it. "Just let him sleep, there's no rush. We made contact with the local police, Toms father has been taken in for questioning. Tom can't go home, at least not yet. We have handed the case over to CPS, and they will make contact with you in the nearest future."

Charlie nodded, it was common procedure. "We have just asked Leah if Tom can stay with her, we would like him to stay with us, but we don't have space, it's that ok?"

"I don't see why that should be a problem, CPS has to talk with you," Watson addressed Leah, "but I think that would be just fine."

* * *

It was late in the afternoon. Charlie and Joey were snuggled up on the couch. It had been a hectic day. They had gone shopping with Tom, to get him the essentials. He had left home with nothing. They had been to the police station in order for him to give a statement. After that, they had got him settled in at Leah's. Home again they had been met with a sick Jordan, he had a fewer. Rachel had come over and checked, but it was just one of those things that can happen. It was just a matter of rest and sleep for him. He had been fussing and crying, but finally settled down and now he was sleeping.

Joey sat with her feet on the table, Charlie was lying sideways with her head on her shoulder and arm across her stomach. She looked at Joey lying with her eyes closed. Charlie was exhausted. She had no doubt she was pregnant. she felt dead on her feet. Dealing with Tom was hard on both of them, and Charlie couldn't help but worry about Joey.

"How are you feeling Honey?" She placed a kiss on her cheek. Joey smiled."I feel like the luckiest woman alive. I have my wife in my arms, my baby in her tummy. I have my sister and my brother here, safe." She turned her head and found Charlie's lips. "I'm not pretending that this isn't hard, it is, but knowing that we can be here for them. That's a good feeling!"

"Sorry to interrupt girls, but I want to show you something." Kate came into the living room closely followed by Tara. They got up, Kate grabbed Joey's hand and Tara Charlie's, they tugged them along upstairs. "Ok, promise you won't open your eyes until we say?" Charlie and Joey was amused, and a little exited. Kate had been painting the bedroom, but they had no idea what she had done. They had given her free reins, knowing that they could paint over it again if it turned out crappy.

Kate and Tara stood behind Charlie and Joey, covering their eyes with their hands. They guided them into the bedroom. "On three!" Kate let go of Charlie and stepped back, Tara did the same. They counted them down.

Charlie couldn't believe her own eyes when she opened them. The mural was breathtaking. She looked around the room, jaw wide open, Joey had the same expression. "Kate…wow… you did this?" Charlie was flabbergasted. Kate looked like a little kid, grinning from ear to ear, exited about their reaction. "Wow… " Charlie let her eyes drink in the painting covering the room.

Kate had continued the view from the window, the beach, the ocean, the cliffs in the distance. It looked like a photography. She had painted it as a sunset scene, the last rays of the sun over the horizon, soft light over the scenery. The sky painted in the sealing was slowly darkened and stars were just coming out. The actual picture covered two walls and half the sealing, but she had blurred it out and dragged the colors out, gradually becoming paler and paler until it disappeared into a creamy white.

Charlie turned to Kate and pulled her in for a hug. "I'm seriously impressed, I didn't know you could do that!" Joey joined them and put her arms around both of them. "Thank you Kate, this is beautiful! Maybe we should change bedroom?" Joey was seriously impressed. It was beyond her comprehension that an eighteen year old could produce something like that. They let her go and continued to admire the mural.

Kate was delighted by their reaction, it was just as good as she hoped for, even better. She put her arm around Tara and gave her a kiss. Both of them grinning at Charlie and Joey's reaction. "I think you impressed them!" Tara repaid Kate for the kiss.


	43. Chapter 43

**Sorry for the long wait for this chapter. I have been wrapped up in the new story I've written: 'After the storm', and since I don't have an advertising agency I brag of it myself, It's time well spent reading it! **

**As always, thanks for your kind Reviews! Hope you enjoy this chap too!**

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Charlie was ogling her wife. They were getting dressed for the evening and Charlie had trouble looking at anything but the curve of Joey's butt sticking up in the air as she rummaged through a drawer. Her hormones were raging through her body because of the pregnancy. She grinned and walked over, putting her hands on Joey's waist, Joey rose and turned to her.

"I just thought if we want to add our secret ingredient to the 'fishy soupy thing' we have to do it now!" Charlie gave her a cheeky grin. Joey put her hands on her stomach, feeling the little bump, "Someone is a little hormonal I think, I'm always at your service Dear!" She grinned and kissed her.

She remembered very well how much she needed Charlie when she was pregnant, and she was more than happy to be there for her. She let her hands wander up her chest coming to a rest on top of her bra. She gently massaged her, causing Charlie to moan and press closer to her. Charlie lifted her hand and placed them behind Joey's head and pulled her in for a kiss. Their lips met, tongue danced, hands caressed.

Joey let her hands wander to her back, removing the bra. She pushed her gently down on the bed and hovered over her, supported on hands and knees. She tossed her hair to one side, smiled down at her and lowered her head to taste the two hardened peaks on her chest.

She dwelled there for a long time, causing Charlie to moan and writhe under her. She lifted her head and smiled at her, leaning down and finding her mouth. She let her hand wander down Charlie's body, finding the spot between her legs that longed for her.

Joey lifted her head slightly and looked into her face as she let her hand work. She grinned, lowered her head and placed soft kisses all the way down her body, finally ending up where her hand was and replaced her fingers with her mouth.

* * *

"Ok, let's organize this!" Leah was taking the lead. Charlie and Joey had realized that it would be close to impossible to have the dinner party at their place. They had talked to Leah and agreed to have the whole thing in the Diner.

"Joey has to be the chef for the night, Charlie and myself will be her trusted assistants. Kate and Tara can take care of the decorations. Aden and Ruby can get the booze, and VJ and Tom can stay out of trouble!"

Tom and VJ laughed and elbowed each other and the rest saluted her and went to work.

"It's so good of you to let us have the dinner here, it'll be perfect!" Joey gave Leah a hug. Leah chuckled and hugged her back. The three of them entered the kitchen to start on the bouillabaisse. When they were out of sight from the rest, Leah turned to them with the worried crease between her eyebrows. "Have you heard anything from the police about Tom?"

"Watson has the weekend of, and it's not happening much over the weekend anyway. She filled me in on what happened yesterday though. "Charlie understood why Leah was concerned.

"Yeah, a woman from CPS called me, they want to have a chat with me Monday, but they didn't have any information about what was going on." Leah started to chop onions while she talked.

"Well, they had Tom's father in for questioning, apparently he denied the whole thing. They should have Lily in today, but I don't know how that went. Tom won't be allowed to go back home before the investigation is over, and it's a strong possibility that he can't go home then either." Both Leah and Joey had stopped working and looked at her.

"Do you think they would send him back home to his father?" Joey didn't like that thought at all.

"I think it would take a miracle if his father manages to stay out of jail, I just hope that Lily does the right thing, but even if she doesn't the evidences should be enough to land him some prison time." Charlie didn't like the idea of Tom going back to his father any more than Leah and Joey. She had a hope that Lily told the truth, or better still, told the truth and left the man. She didn't hold her breath though, what they had seen of Lily so far didn't indicate that she was able to make a good decision.

"I hope he does end up in jail, no kid should experience what Tom did. I'm happy to have him with me, he and VJ get along great, he can stay for as long as he need!"

"That's great Leah, the fact is that we have no idea how this will pan out, knowing that he has a loving home to stay in makes everything a lot easier. Once again Leah comes to the rescue!" Joey put her arms around Leah's neck, carefully not to touch her with fishy hands, and gave her a hug.

* * *

Kate and Tara sat at a table and folded napkins, they listened to the laughing from the kitchen, amused by the fact that the three in there sounded like high school kids, not thirty what women. "I hope I'm like that when I'm thirty!" Tara grinned at the sound of something hitting the floor followed by hysteric laughter.

"Joey isn't thirty yet!" Kate could hardly contain her laughter, "maybe we should check and see if they need help, I think we would do a better job in there than them!" They jumped up and headed for the kitchen, curious to see what the 'adults' were up to. They cracked when they saw the scene in front of them.

Joey was sitting on the floor, frowning, drenched in water and lettuce in her lap. Charlie and Leah leaned over the worktop laughing their ass off.

"What happened ?" Tara wiped her eyes.

"Someone thought it was a good idea to bring the water to the lettuce to rinse it off, instead of doing it the easy way, take the lettuce to the water…" Joey frowned at Charlie, but couldn't keep the sour face. "I guess it is kind of funny… "

Tara and Kate shook their head and left the three to it.

"I'm so sad this is your last night here." They sat down at the table again, Tara grabbed a hold of Kate's hand. "Can't you ask if you can stay the rest of the summer? I hate to see you go."

"I don't want to go either, maybe I could ask… but I haven't asked Charlie or Joey if it would be ok. It's kind of last minute, If my parents said yes… I intruded on them once, I don't like doing that again."

"I'm sure they won't mind, I can ask them if you want to." Tara felt like she would do anything to get Kate to stay. She would resort to begging if she had to. "You know, we can trade with them, if they let you stay, you can do a mural in Beanies bedroom, they love the one up on the loft. I'm sure they will do anything to get one in his room." Tara was pleased with her own idea, that would be an offer Charlie and Joey couldn't resist.

Kate grinned and nodded, her head already spinning with ideas. Tara jumped up and headed for the kitchen.

The three in the kitchen was working seriously now. Tara cleared her throat to get the attention. "I have something to ask," She suddenly felt that this wasn't going to work anyway. She shuffled her feet and studied the floor.

"Yeah, what?" Joey smiled at an obviously nervous Tara.

Tara looked up into three smiling faces, she got her confidence back. "I know this is kind of last minute, but I, we, wondered if Kate could stay for the rest of the summer. She could do a mural in Beanies room, as a thank you…" Tara chewed her lip and looked at Charlie and Joey.

"Well, what does her parents say?" Charlie suspected they hadn't got to that part yet.

"We haven't asked yet, we wanted to hear with you first." Tara's heart sank, this wouldn't work out.

"Why don't you ask them, hear what they say, and give us some time to think about it?"

Tara lit up again, gave Joey, the last speaker a hug before she rushed back to Kate.

* * *

"I'm looking for my daughter!" A deep bass filled the Diner. Charlie, Joey and Leah hurried out of the kitchen and were met by a very tall man with a petit woman by his side. They didn't have to be geniuses to understand that this was Kate's parents.

"Hi, welcome," Charlie took the lead and introduced herself. "I'm Charlie, this is my wife Joey, Tara's sister and Leah." The man took her outstretched hand, it nearly disappeared in his. He gave her a big grin "I'm Ryan, this is my wife, Kathryn and we are Kate's parents." They all shook hands.

"It's really nice to finally meet you, "Kathryn studied the couple in front of her, "Tara would stuff our ears full of how great it was to visit you after her first time here. It's good to have faces to put to the names!" She smiled at them. "So, where are the two lovebirds?"

Joey and Charlie grinned and put their arms around each other. "They were supposed to be here, but it looks like they have fled the nest."

"Probably out somewhere, making out!" Ryan chuckled, "I think my daughter is in love."

Joey grinned, she already liked this man.

"Speaking of the lovebirds, Kate called me with a question, my wife and I have thought about it and decided that we'll leave the decision up to you two. After all, it's you who are stuck with her for the rest of the summer if you want her to stay!"

"We talked about it too, we wanted to hear what you thought about it, but Kate gave us an offer we can hardly decline. She made this amazing mural in one bedroom, and if she could stay she would do one in Jordan's room." Joey chuckled, "Seriously, your daughter is a wonderful person, we already love her, and it would be great to have her for the rest of the summer. Beside, Tara would be a nightmare to live with if we sent her girlfriend away!"

"Good, then it's settled! Now, I want to know more about you two, and I'm sure you'll like to hear who we are too!"

* * *

Charlie lay on her back in bed, supported by pillows. Joey was giving her a foot massage, the evening had been a great success, but it was long and she ached all over.

"I hate to think that in a few months I'll look more like a whale than anything else. My feet hurt like hell, and I haven't gained more than a few pounds. I'll die!" Charlie threw her head back and groaned.

Joey grinned and put more soul into her work. "You'll never look like a whale. You're going to be the most beautiful, pregnant woman in the world! And don't worry, I don't mind rubbing your feet, gives me an excuse to touch you!" She gave her a cheeky grin.

"Kate's parents was lovely, imagine having such supporting and loving parents. It was great meeting them." Joey let her thought dwell on them for a moment. They both had grown up in Perth, they had been high school sweethearts, got married as soon as they were old enough and was still going strong. They had lost a daughter to cancer before they got Kate and that made them quite protective of her.

The most important thing for them was that Kate should have the opportunity to be everything she could be. They supported her in everything. When she had outed herself at fifteen, it hadn't been much of a shock, she had never shown any interest for guys and Kate used to say she wanted to marry a girl when she was little. They had seen the signs all the way and Kate's happiness came before everything else and they supported her.

"Yeah, it's great to know that there is parents like that out there, parents that love and support their kids no matter what!" Charlie liked the couple too. She just wished that Joey's parents had been more like that. Instead she had a mother that ruined the life of all her children.

"I'm glad we can be here for your siblings, we can't replace their parents, but at least we can love them and support them!"

"Yeah, I'm glad too, and I'm glad I can love and support you!"

* * *

"I'm so happy that you are here for the rest of the summer!" Tara lay on top of Kate showering kisses over her face. Kate grinned, cupped her face and gave her a propped kiss. "Me too! I love being here, Charlie and Joey is just wonderful, but most of all I love being with you." She let her hands wander down Tara's back, coming to a rest on her butt.

"I love you too!" Tara grinned, lowered her head and assaulted her neck before she continued down.


	44. Chapter 44

**Thank you for all your great reviews, I hope you all survived last chapter, it wasn't as good as I wanted it to be, but I hope I redeem myself with this one. I hope you all enjoy it!**

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Lily walked towards her new church, it wasn't new, she had been there for a year, but she still called it new. She was lost in thoughts as she slowly walked down the street. She had been brought in for questioning yesterday, her husband had coach her on what to say. She hated what he had done, but at the same time, she felt like she had encouraged him to it. The letter from Tara had thrown them both.

She had no idea what to do. She hated the thought of Tara being gay, and she hated Joey for making Tara think it was ok. That her husband had hit Tom though, that made her think. It reminded her of the time with Joey's father. She had run and left her daughter with an abusive father, could she do the same mistake again? She knew that once you overstep the barrier and hit someone, it's so much easier next time.

She reached the church and headed for the pastor's office, she had to talk to someone about this. She knocked on the door and a voice told her to enter. She took a deep breath and pushed the door open.

"Oh, g'day Lily, you're kind of early for the afternoon service." The pastor was a kind looking elderly man.  
"Good afternoon Pastor, yes I am, I hoped I could take some of your time?"  
"That shouldn't be a problem, it's my wife that will do the preaching today, so I don't have anything to prepare. Have a seat!" He motioned to a chair.

"So, what can I help you with?" The Pastor looked at her, he didn't know Lily that well, since she had only been there for a year and she wasn't the one screaming for attention. To him it had seemed that she was happy with just being there.  
Lily took a minute to gather her thoughts before she told him the whole story.

"Hm… You have experienced a lot of grief in your lifetime. As you said yourself, you have done a lot of mistakes. The good thing is that we can leave those things behind us. Yesterday is gone, you can't go back and redo your steps. What is important is what you do from here. You can't change your past, but you can change your future.

You know we believe in forgiveness, that's what make it possible to move on. I know you have grasped the concept of that, but have you grasped the concept of being lenient?"

Lily didn't answer.

"God tells us that we shall not judge people. He tells us to have mercy, be patient, to love. It says in the Bible that we shall be judge by the same measure we use to judge other with. Would you pass your own judgment?"

Lily stared down on her hands, she knew very well that she would fall through.

"You see, it's so easy to see what's wrong with others, seeing what's right on the other hand, that's what's important.  
It's so easy to see the speck of sawdust in other's eye, but not pay attention to the plank in your own eye. So how can you offer to remove that speck of dust from your daughter when all the time there's a plank in your own?

I'm not talking about your past here. As I said, you can't change your past, only your future. I'm talking about the damnation you spread around you. God never told us to condemn each other. He told us to love each other."

"But the Bible says…" Lily felt like every word this man told her hit her hard, she tried to make it fit into her own way of thinking.

"The Bible says a lot of things, if you take one verse here and one verse there, you can make it say whatever you want. For instance, you take the verse: 'then Judas went away and hanged himself', then take this: 'go away and do the same', finish off with: 'what are you waiting for'?

It's in the Bible, does that mean you should do it?"

Lily had no trouble understanding his point.

"You see, it's not each single word that makes up the Bible. It's the whole book. When you look at its entirety, you will see that there's only one message in here. That's love. Do you know what love is?"

Lily felt ashamed, she didn't know what to say, she looked at the pastor and shook her head.

"Well, this book not only tell us to love, it explain what love is. Love is patient, kind, it does not envy. Love is not proud, it's not rude, it's not self-seeking. Love is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love rejoice with the truth. Love always protect, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love is a gift and there are no labels on that gift."

Lily felt tears burning behind her eyes, she shuffled to her feet, not wanting the pastor to see her reaction. She stretch out a hand and shook his shortly before she walked out. She didn't stay for the service, she walked out, down the street, head swarming with thoughts.

* * *

"Can you hear that?" Joey lay on the couch with her head in Charlie's lap.  
"No…"  
"Exactly, it's completely silent!" Joey took Charlie's hand that was playing with her hair. Kate and Tara had disappeared with a bag of blankets and a cooler with food and drinks. Aden had taken Ruby on a date. Apparently Aden had prepared something special, Ruby had borrowed Joey's blue silk dress again, and Aden had picked her up dressed in a suit.

Jordan was sleeping and the two had the evening to themselves. "What would you like to do, since there's no one here to disturb us?"Joey placed her hand on the face of the woman she loved, tracing her lips with her thumb. Charlie kissed it.  
"I can think of a lot of things to do, I suggest that we start out here on the couch, I want to make love to my beautiful wife and then we take it from there!" Charlie lowered her head and met Joey's halfway.

* * *

"Aden please, tell me where you're taking me!" Ruby was partly amused and partly irritated. Aden had picked her up, blindfolded her and now she sat in his car while he was driving somewhere. Aden chuckled, "Patience my love, patience!"

"I don't want to be patient, I want to know where we're going! We have been driving for an hour at least, I want to know!"

"Well, actually, we have only been driving for twenty minutes, and you'll be delighted to know that we're here!" Aden parked the car and stepped out, heading for the passenger door to help Ruby out.

"Don't take the blindfold off, I'll guide you." Aden put his hands on her shoulders and gently pushed her forward. "Aden, are you sure we're in the right place? You told me to get all dressed up, but I can tell that we are walking on what, a dump?"

"We're in the right place, don't worry, just a few more steps and we're there." Aden could hardly contain his laughter. He really looked forward to show her what he had done.

"Ok, Rubs, are you ready?"  
Ruby put out her tongue, "What do you think smart ass?"

Aden lifted his hands and removed the blindfold. "Aden, what? This is our house. What on earth do you mean with all this secrecy? I know where I live, this is not funny Aden!"

Aden chuckled, "No, that's Charlie and Joey's house, "He turned her around, "This is our house!" Ruby was speechless. She looked at the house in front of her. She had seen it many times, it was the rundown neighboring house. No one had lived there for a long time.

"What do you mean our house?" She turned and looked at a grinning Aden.

"I know it's not much to look at now, but I'll spend next year renovating it while you finish your last year at uni. Come on, let me show you!" Aden grabbed her by the hand and tugged her into the house.

She was met by a blanket spread out in the living room, roses were scattered out, there was champagne in a cooler and heaps of drawings and color samples.

Aden stopped her and gave her a kiss, letting his hand rest on the small of her back. He reluctantly pulled away, grinning when he saw Ruby pouting at him.

"Pull in that lip, Rubs, or you'll regret it, it won't make a good picture to remember, you standing pouting while your boyfriend is down on his knee!" He grinned from ear to ear when he saw the reaction in her face change from pouting to surprise as he knelt down on one knee.

"Ruby, I have known you for years, you became a friend, you became a part of my family. I fell in love with you, and I want you to be my family for real. I love you more than words can say…" He picked out a box from his pocket, opened it and showed it to her. "Ruby Buckton, would you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

Ruby had tears streaming down her face and she smiled from ear to ear. She cupped his face with her hands and kissed him. "Yes Aden Jefferies, I'll marry you!"

Aden took the ring out from the box and placed it on her finger. He pulled her down so she was sitting on the thigh of is bent leg and kissed her. "I thought we could have the marriage when you are finished next spring, then the house will be finished, you have your education and we can make our own family! I want to have little Beanies on our own!"

Ruby giggled, "I want to have Beanies with you, and I think next spring would be perfect for a wedding. Let's make some babies right now!" She gave him a cheeky grin and started to pull off his tie.

* * *

"This is magic! I could lay out here forever with you!" Kate let her hand caress Tara's thigh resting across her hips. "I know, this is perfect, the stars, the moon, the cliffs keeping us sheltered. I feel so protected and safe here!" Tara let her finger trace the shape of Kate's breasts. They had taken blankets and food to a sheltered beach they had found on one of their morning runs, It was a perfect little stretch of sand.

"So, what are you going to do three days without me?" Tara paid a little closer attention to her girlfriends chest.  
"I have no idea, I'll miss you like crazy!" She let her hand venture on Tara's thigh. "Seriously, I'll do the mural in Beanies room, and I might give Charlie and Joey a little surprise in theirs." She smiled up at the sky, she had a great idea she wanted to do. She concentrated on Tara again.

"I'll miss you, so I better get as much of you as I can now! She gave her a cheeky grin and in one swift motion she had given herself the upper hand.

"I'll miss you too, three days seems like an eternity, it'll be fun, but not as fun as being here with you!" Tara placed her hands behind Kate's head and pulled her down for a kiss.


	45. Chapter 45

_I'm sorry for the long wait for a new chapter on this story, I've suffered from writers block on this one. I hope you have enjoyed 'What Was Before' in between._

_I'm sorry that I have to do it this way to keep the story going. I feel like I wrote myself into a corner and I don't see a way out if I should kept it going the same way. I'm sure all of you want to see Charlie have the baby and some more children and family stuff happening. _

_I have some ideas for this story, and I would like to get it going so this chapter is kind of a summary._

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"Joey, I need you!" Charlie was calling out from the living room, Joey appeared from the kitchen with a smile, "Always at your service Honey! What do you need?" Joey walked over to her wife and kissed her on the top of her head.

"My feet are killing me, can I have one of your wonderful massages?" Charlie tilted her head back and received a kiss. "Of course, just give me a sec to check on Beanie, he should be asleep by now." Joey gave her another kissed and went to see him.

Joey eased the door open and went inside. She leaned over the bed and looked at her son. He was getting big, fourteen months and had started walking. He was still wobbly and he made them laugh by the look on his face when he fell on his diaper-padded butt.

Joey lifted her head and looked at the mural Kate had painted in there as a 'thank you' for letting her stay the summer. It was a farm scene with cows, sheep, a horse and a bunch of rabbits and chickens. It was cute and just right for a children's bedroom. She looked back down on the dark-haired head peaking up from the duvet, she gently let her finger stroke his head before she walked back out to join Charlie.

Charlie looked at her wife emerging from the bedroom, Joey had gotten a confident way of moving, more so than what she had before. She watched as Joey knelt in front of her, taking the time to kiss her belly. "Shhh, Jarlie is sleeping, don't wake the baby. I finally have some peace and quiet, I don't want my bladder to be used as a football again!" Charlie pretended to be annoyed. She wasn't but being eight months pregnant wasn't exactly a walk in the park. She had severe back pain and her feet hurt all the time. One of her favorite things was to get a good rubdown from Joey.

Joey didn't mind, she loved taking care of her, repaying her for all that she had done for her when she was pregnant. She thought that Charlie looked gorgeous with her tummy. She was big, but not more than normal, she was beautiful. Both of them looked forward to the new baby. This time they knew what waited for them, it wasn't new and scary, they were just excited and happy.

Joey started her mission to make Charlie feel better. She took a foot and started to move her thumbs in circles over the sole, Charlie sighed and leaned back, surrendered to Joey's touch. Joey let her mind wander back while she worked.

The summer had been amazing, except the deal with Tom. He was still living at Leah's and had enrolled in school in Summer Bay. He and VJ had become good friends and they hang out all the time. VJ was learning Tom to surf while Tom included VJ in his training, the result was two very fit young men.

Most important was that Tom was happy. They hadn't heard anything from Lily, but his father was serving jail time for his beating of Tom. Tom had the option of going back to live with his mother, but when he was offered the choice of either move back home or stay with Leah, he had chosen the latter.

Tara had the summer of her life, Kate had stayed the whole time, but decided to return home to attend the art school she had been accepted in. They had parted as friends, but realizing that a long distant relationship was hard to work out. They had decided to let each other go. It was hard on Tara, Kate was her first love, the one that helped her through the difficult process of coming out.

Tara had drowned herself in training, and all her hard work really paid off. She had participated in several regattas and was now ranking as one of the best racers in the area.

Ruby and Aden were engaged. Aden had bought the neighboring house for the money he had received from a trust his grandparents had put up for him. He had gained access to it when he turned twenty-five. He was hard at work renovating it, he wanted it done in time for their wedding in the spring. He had been at it for five months, and the house was turning out beautiful.

Charlie and she were happy that Ruby and Aden were going to live so close by. The sister band had only gotten stronger as time went by. Their little family was really close, and they all enjoyed it. Ruby was finishing her last year at uni, and she had already been offered a teaching position at the school, she had accepted.

Charlie had resigned from her work, her one-year leave had come to an end, and she didn't want to go back. She had figured that her family was more important than being a cop, she didn't want to put herself in danger. She had decided, after a lot of encouragement from Ruby, Joey and Tara to take courses to become a counselor. Having Tara and Tom around made her realize how much she liked to help kids and she really wanted to keep doing that. Her training as a cop didn't hurt either in that kind of a job.

Charlie looked forward to the new challenge, but most she looked forward to the new baby. She had decided to do the same as she did when Joey had Beanie, taking a year just to be Mum. She would do the studying at the same time, but it was online, and it wouldn't be any problem combining the two.

Joey had gotten an offer from Alf to buy the 'Blaxland', He felt that he started to get old and wanted to cut back on his commitments. He offered her to buy the bait shop too, and after some deliberation, she and Charlie had agreed to go for it.

She really enjoyed being her own boss, the business was going great and she had hired a girl part time in the store. She would hire her full time when the baby was due, she wanted to be there for Charlie and the new baby.

Joey kissed Charlie's foot, "Better?" She grinned up at her.  
"Much better, thank you!" Charlie grinned back. Joey rose and sat beside her, placing her hand on top of her stomach. "I just want to say that I love you, I love Jarlie and I can't wait to meet him or her. Knowing that a little you soon will join us… It makes me so happy!" Joey mover her hand from her stomach to her cheek.

She looked her in the eyes. "Are you worried about the birth?"  
"You know, I thought I would be, seeing you go through it… but I don't, maybe because I know it's unavoidable. I'm really glad you're going to be there, with you I can do anything!" Charlie smiled at her and kissed her. "I'm so happy with you, our family, the lot. I'm so glad that I can give you a baby, mine and yours!"

* * *

Ruby stopped in her tracks and admired the house. Aden was doing a really good job, the house was turning out to be a gem, and it was all thanks to him. She walked through the front door and saw Aden hovering over some drawings with another worker. She sneaked up behind him and placed her hands over his eyes. Aden took a hold of her wrist and spun around as he rose.

"Hi, gorgeous, home already?" He smiled, took her in his arms and kissed her. Ruby kissed him back. "You know I have to be here when my sister have her kid, I know it's still a month, but I'm writing my master, and I can do that here just as easily as in the city. Beside, in the city I have no one to do this with!" She gave him a cheeky grinned and stretched to kiss him again.

---

"Anybody home?" Ruby called out as she walked into the kitchen. She heard footsteps down the stairs from the loft and Tara appeared. "Ruby" What are you doing home?" Tara flung her arms around her."Let… me… breathe!" Ruby teased her, Tara had really squeezed her hard. Tara let her go and giggled.

"As I told Aden, I want to be here when my sister have her baby!" Ruby smiled and headed over to the fridge to get something cold to drink. "Where are they by the way?"

"They went for a little walk with Beanie, they should be back any minute, Charlie has trouble walking, her back is hurting." Tara explained.

"Yeah, babies are great, but they sure cause a lot of discomfort on the path to be ready to meet the world." Ruby leaned against the counter with a can of soda. "How are you doing, it's been what? A month since I was here last?"

"Something like that. I'm doing great I just got first place with my crew last week, it was a lot of fun!" Tara smiled dreamy, "and… please don't tell Charlie and Joey yet, it's so new, but I might have met someone…"

"Wow, that's great, do I know who it is?" Ruby grinned at the blushed face in front of her.

"You probably do, she is a little older than me, but I rather not tell, it's so new, I don't know what it is really. We are just taking it slow, you know, see what happens." Tara couldn't help but smile.

Ruby looked at her, happy that she finally had moved on from Kate. Kate was a great girl and if she had stayed in or near the Bay, Tara and she would probably still be together. Seeing that Kate was so far away, she agreed with them, it was best if they split up, it would only hurt both of them if they found someone new. Long distance relationships seldom worked out.

"Well, I hope you let us meet her one day, I would love to see who it is!"

Charlie and Joey coming up the stairs with Jordan interrupted them. Ruby bent down when Jordan came through the door holding both his mums hands. When he saw her, he let go of them and attempted to walk over to her. "Bubu!" He exclaimed. As he wobbled over, he stumbled before he made it all the way, but Ruby leaned forward and caught him.

"Wow, you're a big boy! I can't believe how much you have grown in a month!" She kissed him on the cheek. She rose with Jordan in her arms. She grinned at her sister. "Wow, I can't believe how much you have grown in a month!" She teased her, walked over and hugged her.

"Just so you know, before we start arguing. I'm here to stay, no way is Jarlie going to be born without me here! I'm writing on my master, and I can do that just as easily here. So save your breath and just say welcome home!" Ruby put her one free arm on her waist, trying to look firm, but a grin lurking on her face gave her away.

"I'm too exhausted to argue, so welcome home little sister!" Charlie grinned at her, she was really happy she had come home.

"So I have become Bubu?" Ruby hoisted Jordan, he laughed at her and grabbed her hair. "I thought he was over that hair obsession, I guess I was wrong!" She pulled faces as Jordan tighten his grip. Joey laughed and stepped in to save her hair. "It's only yours Ruby, he just loves you!"

"What does he call you two, I mean if he has started to call me Bubu, he must have started to call you mama or something like that." Ruby was curious, she had wondered how they would work that one out.

"Yeah, he calls both of us mama when he doesn't care which one of us attend to him. If he wants me, he say Mamy and if he wants Charlie he says Mama. I think he is so smart that he has figured out the last letter in my name and put it as the ending, you know he has intelligent mothers!"

They all laughed, it was just good to be together!


	46. Chapter 46

**Thank you for all your reviews, they are much appreciated, hope you'll enjoy this too!**

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Joey lay on her back in bed next to Charlie, she couldn't sleep, her back hurt. She had heaved gear for the 'Blaxland' and probably lifted wrong or something like that. She shifted position, trying to find a more comfortable position.

"Are you awake?" Charlie whispered.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."

"That's ok, I heard you groan, everything ok?"

"Yeah, I just lifted wrong today or something, my back hurts."

"Maybe it's sympathy pain, my back isn't the best in the world either." Charlie chuckled a little. Her back really gave her problems, but when she was laying down, it didn't bother her at all.

Joey carefully maneuvered herself so she was facing Charlie. "I know, I'm sorry, I shouldn't complain." She lifted her hand and stroke Charlie's face. "You are so beautiful, seven years, and I'm still mesmerized by you. It's so strange to think about that it's been that long since the first time I met you. If I had known back then what I have today… I'm so happy, I got everything I ever dreamt of and more, because of you." Joey leaned in and placed a soft kiss on her lips.

"I know, I feel the same way. In a way I wish I had done what I wanted to do back then, take you in my arms and remove you from all the bad things, to a place where I could be alone with you… I can't believe how gutless I was back then… I can never express how grateful I was when you came back. Seeing you walk through those doors… it felt like I juggled my heart and every second I was about to drop it and have it shattered on the floor, but it didn't, it was saved by you… You make me so indescribably happy, I have a family that I'm so proud of." Charlie grinned. "I just can't wait until Jarlie is ready to meet the world!"

"Me neither… I have been thinking about one thing," Joey paused, "I know we decided to name the baby Rebecha if it was a girl, I really like that name, it's a little bit of Ruby and a little of yours, it's perfect. I like Roy for a boy too… But Charlie… If it's a boy, can we call him Charlie? I would love for him to have your name, if you don't think it's weird."

"We can call him Charlie, but wouldn't that be confusing?" Charlie chuckled a little over Joey's eagerness to call the baby after her.

"We could call him Charlz for short, like we do to you and stop using that on you. I just call you Baby instead!" Joey grinned and kissed her again.

"Ha! Can you hear Ruby calling me Baby? She would laugh her ass off." Charlie giggled, "But I think it's a good idea, Charlz it is!" Charlie turned around so she was lying with her back to Joey who spooned with her. "I love you Charlie Buckton!" She whispered in her ear.  
"I love you too Joey Buckton."

* * *

Ruby was walking into the Diner to get some take away. Charlie wasn't capable of cooking because of her back, and Joey was tired. Ruby had volunteered to take Jordan and get something from the Diner. She was greeted by Leah who rushed over to pick up Jordan. Ruby motioned for her to stop. "Leah, just kneel down right there!" Leah looked at her a little confused but did as she was told. Ruby lifted Jordan out of his stroller and placed him on the floor. "Go to Aunty Leah!" She pointed him in the right direction. He looked at Leah, laughed and toddled over to her. Leah reached out and caught him before he stumbled.  
"Oh God, you are so big!" She tickled his tummy. She was rewarded with a giggle fit from him. "How's Charlie doing?"

"She has a hard time with her back, makes it difficult for her to move around, I think we all look forward to the baby being born. She had her back checked to see if there's something wrong, but it looks like it's only the weight of the baby causing problem, so once Jarlie is out, she should be back to normal." Ruby said.

"Good! So do you want anything?" Leah handed Jordan over and stepped behind the counter. "Yeah, we're having take away, none of us feel up to cooking, so we take the easy way out." Ruby made her orders and sat down on the couch to wait. She had Jordan on her lap and played with him, pulling faces and he did his best to copy her.

"Ruby Buckton, don't tell me that is your kid?" Ruby jumped and looked up, she had been too occupied to notice what happened around her.

"Nicole, What are you doing here?" Ruby put Jordan on the couch beside her, rose and put her arms around her. "How long has it been, three years?" She stepped back and looked at her. Nicole looked like she had just stepped out of the front page of a fashion magazine.

"Well, you didn't answer my question, is he yours?" Nicole was curious. Ruby giggled and picked him up, "No this is Jordan, Charlie and Joey's son."

"Wow, he's a cutie. I was looking forward to see their son, curious you know, must be from living here so long before." She smiled and reached out her arms to Jordan. He looked at her for a moment, not sure about what to think about this lady, before he decided that she wasn't dangerous and leaned over to her.

Ruby and Nicole sat down on the couch. "So, what brings you back, have you been here long?" Ruby wanted to know.

"Actually, I live in Yabbie Creek, I'm a stylist and I got a short term assignment there, in a beauty parlor, supervising and teaching the people working there. It's really great." Nicole hefted Jordan, "he is really cute, it's amazing that he looks just like a mix of Charlie and Joey, they have been lucky."

"Yeah they are lucky, and that job sounds great… I guess I should tell you," Ruby reached out he left hand for Nicole to see. She grasped her hand and looked at the ring on her finger, it was a simple, but beautiful single diamond ring.

"You're engaged! Wow, who's the lucky guy?"

"It's Aden…" Ruby was a little nervous about how Nicole would react, she had dated him for a while before. "Wow, Aden? That's great, he is a really good guy, I'm so happy for you!" Nicole smiled and gave her a peck on the cheek.

"What about you? Anyone special?" Ruby looked at her and saw her blushing.

"No…well, I just met someone, but it's really new, and I'm not sure where it's going, we're taking it slow and… well, we'll see"

Leah came with the food Ruby had ordered, "Here's everything for you, and I added a little desert from me, tell Charlie and Joey hi from me, maybe I pop by tonight or tomorrow."

"Thank you Leah, and just come, you know we all want you to!" She gave Leah a hug. She went to get Jordan from Nicole, "Do you want to come with me, I'm sure Charlie and Joey would love to see you again, and you could meet Joey's sister Tara."

"I'm actually meeting someone here, so I think I have to pass, but let's get together soon, maybe this weekend we could do something?"

"Sure, give me a ring when you're free!" Ruby gave Nicole a hug and headed home.

* * *

Charlie awkwardly walked around in the kitchen, getting herself a cup of coffee, her back hurt like hell, but she was tired of sitting and just felt like moving around for a bit. She leaned on the counter, looking out the window while the coffee brewed. She was so tired of being pregnant and just wished for it all to be over. If the baby came today, it wouldn't be too soon.

She was disturbed from her thoughts by Ruby coming in with a bag of food and Jordan holding her hand.

"How are you doing, back pain?" Ruby placed the bag of food on the kitchen table.

"Yeah, as always, but it's not that bad, I just need to move around a little. Did you see Leah?" Charlie poured the coffee into a cup and waddled over to the table and sat down.

"I did, I should tell that she'll pop by tonight or tomorrow morning. And guess who I met?" Ruby took the food out of the bag and started to organize lunch. "Nicole is back in town, she lives in Yabbie Creek. I invited her over, but she was meeting someone, but she'll come this weekend. She looked really good. "

"Wow, it's years since I heard anything from her, how's she doing?"

"Apparently great, she is working in a beauty shop." Ruby finished dressing the table. "Where's Joey and Tara, shall I get them?"

"Joey is having a nap, she didn't sleep well last night, look like she pulled something in her back yesterday, but she's fine now, she was just tired. Tara has gone to meet someone. Why don't you get Aden to join us, we have enough food."

Ruby smiled, picked up her phone to call Aden while she made her way to Charlie and Joey's bedroom to wake Joey.

It didn't take long before they all were gathered around the table, tucking into the fabulous meal provided by Leah.

* * *

Charlie went to bed after a long, enjoyable lunch. They had talked about Nicole, baby names, the wedding coming up in a few months. It was a lot of good things to look forward to. Charlie was beyond happy that her sister was going to live right next door.

She lay down on the bed, she felt increasingly uncomfortable. She tried to find the least painful position. She really had to pay for all the moving around. She groaned and shifted, finally finding a position to relax in, she drifted into sleep.

She woke up feeling groggy, she looked at the clock, she had slept for seven hours. She was amazed, no wonder she felt like her head was filled with cotton. She hadn't slept well though, the pain in her back had increased and given her strange dreams. She got up to go to the bathroom.

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Joey was sitting on the couch with Ruby, watching TV, She turned as she heard Charlie coming out from the bathroom. "Good evening sleepy head, nice to see you, I wondered if I had to come and kiss you to get you up!" Her broad smile disappeared when she saw the look on Charlie's face.

"Joey, I think the baby is coming, my water just broke."


	47. Chapter 47

**the other suprise for IJKS, enjoy!**

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"Charlie, it's too early!" Joey jumped up and rushed over to her closely followed by Ruby.

"Don't you think I know that, it's not like I can stop it." Charlie panted for air, the contractions had taken her by surprise and they had set in with full force.

"Of course not, we have to get you to the hospital. Ruby can you…"

"I'm sorry we don't have time." Charlie groaned as a contraction hit her. "The baby is coming now!" She bent over, supporting herself to the doorpost as the contraction ripped through her body.

"Now? Why didn't you say something earlier?" Joey felt herself panicking.

"If I knew, I would, I thought it was just back pain." Charlie heaved for air.

"Ok, ok, it's ok, let us get you to bed, Ruby call Rachel, she can be here in five if she's home and call the ambulance!" Joey took a hold of Charlie and helped her into the bedroom. "It will be ok, we can do this!" Joey tried to calm herself down just as much as Charlie. She quickly piled up pillows for her and threw the covers away.

Charlie grabbed a hold of Joey as the next contraction hit her. "Breathe Charlie, breathe!" Joey coached her.

"Rachel is here in five, I called the ambulance, they'll be here as fast as they can, but there's an accident, and they have to attend to that first." Ruby talked as she rushed to their aid.

"Thanks' Rubs, I think you're about to attend your first birth. Can you sit behind her and support her, I think it's better with me here." Joey tried to remind calm, she had to keep it together until Rachel was there. She eased off her underwear and it was no doubt, this baby was coming now. "Charlie, you're right, the baby is coming now… I don't know what to do!"

Charlie had sweat running down her face, she grabbed a hold of Ruby's knees, who was sitting behind her, supporting her back and with her legs bent. "I need to push!" The last came out in a scream.

"Charlie, this is going too fast, you're going to tear… "Joey was scared, the skin was stretched so tight by the baby's head pushing to get out.

"Hey, where are you?" Rachel's voice reached them from the kitchen.

"In here Rachel, and hurry, the baby is coming!" Joey called back. Rachel came rushing through the door. Joey quickly left her place to Rachel. She took a quick look. "Ok, this is going too fast, I have to cut, if you tear we don't have any control."

Charlie just heaved for air, she didn't care what Rachel did, all she wanted was to get the baby out. The pain was excruciating. "Just get it out of me!" She screamed again, feeling like her body was torn apart.

"Joey, open my MedBag, you'll find some sterile sheets there and I need the scissors in the small pocket on the right side, the ones packed in plastic." Rachel turned her attention to Charlie. "Charlie, try not to push, I have to cut first."

Joey handed her the green sheet, Rachel quickly spread it out, she tore open the plastic around the scissors. "Sorry Charlie, this might hurt, but I don't think you will even notice. "Rachel placed her finger between the baby's head and the skin before she, with one fast snip, cut the skin.

"Hey, any one here, someone called for an ambulance!" A male voice boomed through the house. "Yeah, in here, we have a woman having a baby." Rachel called back. A man and a woman appeared in the door.

"Look, she is too far in the process, the baby has to be born here, bring me some oxygen, and prepare to take her and the baby as soon as she has delivered." The man nodded and disappeared.

Joey crawled into the bed with Charlie and grabbed a hand and used the other to stroke over her hair. "You are doing great Charlie, little Jarlie is here soon!" She leaned forward and kissed her on the head.

"Ok, Charlie, on the next contraction just push with all you have and the head will be out." Rachel talked with a calm voice.

Charlie gasped for air, leaned forward and pushed with a scream. Ruby groaned as she felt Charlie's fingernails dig into the soft skin on the inside of her knees. Joey looked between Charlie's legs as the head appeared, she was mesmerized.

"Good, Charlie, just relax a little while I turn the baby, just breathe!"

Charlie tried to follow her instructions, but it was hard. "Ok, Charlie, just push when you feel the urge and the baby will be out!"

Rachel had a firm grip around the head. Charlie felt her muscles contract again, she heaved for air before she pushed with all that she had. She felt the body slide out and seconds later a cry filled the air.

"It's a girl!" Joey was the first to see. "She leaned over Charlie, who had leaned her head back on Ruby's shoulder. Joey didn't care if Ruby had her face centimeters from Charlie's, she kissed her. She also gave Ruby a peck on the lips, making Ruby stare at her. Joey didn't care, she was just so happy that everything had gone ok.

Rachel lifted the little girl and lay her on Charlie's chest, between her breasts. "A perfect little girl!" She smiled.

Charlie had been really scared when her water broke, it felt like the contractions started on full force, without any warning. It had been incredibly painful, it felt like everything ripped apart in one sudden contraction. She was scared because it was three weeks early, scared because she could feel the baby making its way out and there were no way they would reach the hospital in time.

It had been a relief when Rachel came, but hearing that she was likely to tear scared her too. Then Rachel had to cut and that scared her even more, but she didn't really feel it, everything hurt so it didn't make any difference.

Leaning back against Ruby with Joey hovering over her, she looked down on the little girl laying on her chest, he little hand opened and closed, nipping on her skin. It was amazing, she felt tears running down her face. She looked up at Joey, smiling to her. Joey leaned down and kissed her, their lips parted slightly, "A little girl!" Joey grinned. "Our daughter!" Charlie lifted a hand and placed it behind her neck, pulling her down for one more kiss.

"Joey, do you want to cut the cord?" Rachel interrupted them. Joey turned to her and nodded. "When that's done, we have to get mother and child to the hospital. She is borderline premature, so we have to run test and we have to stitch Charlie up as soon as possible."

* * *

Ruby was sitting out in the waiting area holding a sleeping Jordan on her lap. Joey had gone with the ambulance and Ruby had taken Jordan and the car. She was still a little overwhelmed by the whole experience. This was her first real birth, it was scary and amazing at the same time. She hadn't seen much from her position behind Charlie, but she certainly heard and felt. She had loads of little marks around her knees from Charlie's fingernails.

She had felt the pain her sister had been in, the whole birth had only taken about one hour and thirty, forty minutes. Seeing the little body on her sisters chest though, that made her realize that it was worth it. It was such a miracle that a whole new person had grown inside of her sister, and now it was here. She wiped away some tears running down her face. She looked down on Jordan who snuggled up to her chest, laying securely in her arms. She felt her heart overflow with love for him. She wanted one of her own.

She lifted her head as Leah and Tom came storming in. "We came as fast as we could. How are they doing?" Leah rushed over to her. "When they left the house, they were both doing fine. It was a girl and they are naming her Rebecha. She is borderline premature so they have to make some test, but she was crying and looking healthy." Ruby explained.

"Can we see them soon?" Leah was relieved to hear that everything was fine with mother and daughter.  
"Rachel will come and get us when we can. I'm so grateful that she did this, it's only three months since she had her own daughter, and she isn't working full. I think it's amazing that she does this and she's not even on call." Ruby was truly grateful to her, she started to think about a way to repay her for everything she had done for them.

* * *

Joey sat beside Charlie, facing her as Rachel began to stitch Charlie up.  
"I'm speechless Charlie, she is so beautiful, you did a real good job!" Joey held her hand, she could see what Rachel did really hurt. She tried to distract her. "Think, we have a son and a daughter, the perfect family. Rebecha is perfect, she looked like you!"

"As if you could tell, she was all wrinkles and blood. With Jordan you could tell right away, I can't tell, and all I want to do is hold her again." Tears escaped Charlie's eyes.

"Don't worry, she'll be right back here soon, they just have to give her a thorough check to see that everything is ok. I'm sure it is, I couldn't see anything wrong when I delivered her and cleaned her up." Rachel glanced up from her work. "Just two more stitches, and we're done."

Charlie nodded, it was really unpleasant to be stitched up down there, she just prayed that Rachel would hurry up and finish.

* * *

Tara and Aden came and joined the group waiting to see the new baby and her parents. A nurse had offered Jordan a bed so he was sleeping unaware of everything.  
"I'm so sorry I wasn't home, my date… eh…thing dragged out…" Tara trailed off. Aden stood beside her and smiled, he had accidently pumped into her on his way to the hospital. He had seen who she was with, but Tara had made him swear that he wouldn't tell anyone.

"That's ok, we managed fine. Charlie had a little girl, they are checking both of them out as we speak. It looked like they were doing fine, so there's nothing to worry about." Ruby smiled at her. She walked over to Aden and put her arms around him. "Nice of you to finally show, did you pick Tara up?"

Aden grinned at her, "I bumped into her on my way over… so yeah, I picked her up…" He kissed the top of her head. Ruby turned to Tara.  
"So it was a date? With mystery woman, I presume…" She lifted an eyebrow and grinned. Tara blushed and shuffled her feet.

"I guess, and yes… we had a good time…" Tara looked at Aden. Begging him silently not to say anything. Aden grinned and winked back.

* * *

Charlie was half sitting in a hospital bed with Joey beside her, embracing her. She couldn't help but worry about her daughter, it seemed like it was hours since she was taken away. Joey saw a few tears making their way down her cheek. She lifted her hand and dried them off. "Don't worry Honey, she is fine, they'll come with her any minute now." Joey tried to calm her down, but she was just as worried herself.

The door opened and a nurse came wheeling in with a baby bed. Joey rose from the bed and walked over. Rachel followed right behind the nurse. "You can pick her up!" She said to Joey. Joey carefully put one hand under her head and with the other cradled her body. She put her up to her chest and she felt all the love she had for the little girl overwhelm her, she started to cry. She turned and walked over to Charlie, carefully transferring her over in her arms.

Charlie looked down on the miracle in her arms, it was amazing that this little life had been inside of her for 37 weeks. She was filled with wonder over the beauty of the tiny body. Joey sat down beside her and put her arm around her shoulder again. Charlie leaned into her.

Joey lifted her hand and gently placed it on top of the baby's head. "Charlie, have you ever seen anything so beautiful? A little you… She is breathtaking…"

Rachel cleared her throat, "I'm sure you want to know that there is nothing wrong with her, she is fit as a fiddle. You can go home tomorrow." Charlie and Joey looked at her and sighed with relief.

"Thank you Rachel for being here, again. It wouldn't be the same without you. You have made this possible for us, we're eternally grateful!" Charlie reached out a hand for her.

"Girls, it's really my pleasure, seeing a baby born into such a loving family… It can't get better than this. Beside, Emily and Rebecha will probably be good friends, means we got an excuse to visit each other!" Rachel grabbed Charlie's hand, leaned down and gave her a hug. She extended her pinky and touched Rebecha's cheek, "She is gorgeous, and I think she looks like you Charlie, maybe with a hint of Ruby."

Both Charlie and Joey studied the face of the little girl. "You know, maybe she's right… but I still think it's hard to tell." Charlie concluded, but for her it wasn't important who she looked like, she was theirs.


	48. Chapter 48

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"Honey, she is so beautiful… And so are you. I could look at you feeding her for hours." Joey sat beside Charlie on the couch, looking at the little girl suckling. Charlie turned her head and looked at her. "I know, I could stare at you too, when you fed Jordan. It's just something about it." She leaned in and caught Joey's lips.

"I'm so happy, I can't describe it. I love this little girl so much." Joey gazed into Charlie's eyes, they were glittering blue. "I love you more than I can say. I love you for giving me a daughter, for giving me our son. I think we are the luckiest people alive."

"Me too, I can't begin to describe what I'm feeling. I'm in the perfect state of bliss, this is heaven." Charlie couldn't tear her eyes away from Joey.

Rebecha was five days old and they had started to settle into a routine. As with Jordan, Leah came and cooked for them, mostly because she wanted to be there, not because they really needed her to.

Joey was grateful, she was tired. She hadn't been this tired when Jordan was born, but now they had two kids, and it would probably take some time getting used to. Both Ruby and Tara was a great help, they took Jordan most of the time, giving Charlie and her a chance to concentrate on Rebecha.

They had a great time, being a family, enjoying each other. Life was perfect.

Charlie looked down at the little girl suckling, she smiled, she loved being a mother, bringing her into this world and supplying nourishment for her. She couldn't be more happy, surrounded by her family, Joey by her side. She turned her head and looked at her. "Honey… I just love you so much. I know I say it a lot, but that doesn't make it less true."

"I know, I love you too, and I like that you tell me, it feels good. I love to tell you that I love you too!" Joey grinned at her.  
Charlie caught her lips, "I love to hear it too!"

* * *

Charlie and Joey was snuggled up together on the couch. Charlie was laying behind Joey with her arm under Joey's head and the other around her waist. She could feel that Joey was sleeping, she smiled into her hair; it felt good to lay like this again, spooning with her. Rebecha was fed, changed and sleeping. Jordan was with Ruby over at their house, 'assisting' Aden. Charlie chuckled at the thought, she hoped that Jordan didn't come home full of paint.

Charlie felt completely relaxed and happy, Ruby and Aden's wedding was only a couple of months away. She had a sneaking suspicion that Tara had met someone and Tom was thriving at Leah's. She sighed happily, closed her eyes and fell asleep.

* * *

Lily looked around in the caravan she had rented. It was small, but it would do. She stretched out on the bed, wondering for the thousand time if she had done the right thing. Her husband had served four months for beating Tom. She had used the four months to review her life. She had several talks with the Pastor of her church, and what he said made more and more sense.

His message was easy and loving; don't judge people, love them. She had finally decided that the right thing was to leave her husband. She had lost two kids because of an abusive man, she didn't want to lose two more. She had packed her bags and gone to Summer Bay, three of her four kids were here, she just prayed that they would give her a second chance, even though she didn't deserve it.

She lay on the bed for a while, bracing herself for the meeting with Joey. She didn't want to call first, last time Joey had called her, she hung up on her, Joey would probably do the same to her. She got up from bed, checked herself in the mirror before she headed out the door.

* * *

Charlie woke from her nap, she stretched and felt that Joey was still sleeping, she checked her watch, they had slept for nearly two hours, She eased her arm out from under Joey's head and carefully got up from behind her, not wanting to wake her up. Joey had been tired the last few days, and her back had played up on her, so she wanted to let her sleep as long as she needed.

She went into their bedroom to check on Rebecha, she was sleeping like an angel in her crib. Charlie leaned her underarms on the side, gazing at the little body lying in the bed. She smiled and let her index finger caress her cheek before she quietly went out of the room.

She walked past the sofa and couldn't help herself, she leaned down and brushed her lips over Joey's.  
"You know it takes more than a peck to wake me." Joey mumbled and pointed her lips for one more. Charlie giggled and placed another quick peck on her. "Teas!" Joey complained, lifted her hand, grabbed her around the neck and pulled her down for a proper kiss. Charlie lay down on top of her, making the kiss into a make out session.

Neither of them kept track of time, they just enjoyed the feeling and taste of each other, savoring the moment. A sharp knock on the door interrupted them, they looked at each other, they weren't expecting company. They got up from the couch and went to answer the door.

Joey opened the door and froze. "Lily… " she didn't know what to say. Charlie came up behind her, seeing who their guest was. "Lily, what do you want here?" She folded her arms over her chest and looked sternly at her.

"Can I come in?"

Charlie and Joey looked at each other before Joey stepped aside making room for her to enter. She turned as she stepped through the door.

"Look, I'm not here to cause any problems, I just want to say that I'm sorry for the way I have treated you two, it was wrong. I'm sorry for all the grief I have caused you Joey. I'm sorry I can't say anything but sorry.

I have left my husband, he is getting out of jail next week… I decided I couldn't lose more kids because of a man… I don't want to lose them because of me neither. I don't expect you to forgive me…

I'm staying in the caravan park until I find an apartment. It looks like three of my four children is settling here…

Well, that's all I wanted to say…" Lily looked at them and left.

Joey looked at the door closing behind Lily. "Did I just dream that?"

"Well, if you did we had the same dream… I didn't think she was able to make a rational decision… Maybe I was wrong." Charlie put her arm around Joey, feeling just as flabbergasted as her.


	49. Chapter 49

Charlie giggled at her sister filling the kitchen table with bridal magazines, Ruby had started to fret over the wedding, it was only a week away. Aden was fretting over the house and worked on it day and night, he wanted it finished for their wedding day, he had left all the wedding plans to Ruby, happy to know that all he had to do was show. He didn't care what or where, the only important thing for him was that he got married. That was it, if he just got Ruby he was happy.

Ruby didn't mind taking care of the wedding plans. She had decided that they would have the ceremony on the beach, knowing how much Aden loved the sea. They were having a small dinner in the Diner afterwards and in the evening dance and drinks in the Surfclub.

The only thing missing was the wedding dress, she just hadn't found one, and for each day that passed , the likelihood of finding one rapidly decreased.

"Charlie, I'm going insane, There are so many dresses, but none of them is what I want." Ruby dumped down on a chair and leaned her head in her hands.

"Well, what do you want?" Charlie was a little amused by her sister, but she understood that it was terrible to be one week away from the wedding and without a dress.

"I… this might sound stupid… I want to look like you." She glanced at her sister.

"Aw, Rubs, really?" Charlie smiled, that was just so sweet. She walked over and kissed her head. "You know, if you want to, you can use my dress."

"Are you serious? That dress is just gorgeous… It probably wouldn't work, you're taller than me and I have broader hips, but you beat me in the top area, at least now." Ruby teased her.

"Why don't you try it, it doesn't hurt, you can wear high heels, and the dress is only fitted over parts of the hips. Come on, let's try." Charlie headed for the bedroom, she sneaked in to retrieve the dress, Rebecha was sleeping and she didn't want to wake her.

"Here, let's see." Charlie handed her the dress. They went into Ruby's bedroom to try it. Ruby slipped the dress over her head and turned to let Charlie zip it up, the dress turned out to fit. Ruby turned and faced her sister. "Like I said, you have a little more up here, she pointed to her chest.

"Rubs, it's nothing more than what a padded bra would fix, it's a little long but a pair of high heels will fix that too. You look absolutely beautiful. Go and have a look." Charlie smiled at her sister, that she wanted to look like her had really touched her.

Ruby stood in front of the only full length mirror in the house, it was on the inside of one wardrobe doors in Charlie and Joey's bedroom. She was careful not to disturb Rebecha while she looked at herself in the mirror, she liked what she saw.

She tiptoed out and flung herself around Charlie's neck, "Are you sure I can borrow it?"

"Of course Rubs, it's an honor that you want to!"

* * *

"Where is the rest of the people by the way?" They had cleared away all the magazines and were now enjoying a cup of coffee. Ruby had suddenly realized that everyone else was gone.

"Joey took Jordan to go and see Lily with Tara and Tom, they wanted to see her, but they didn't want to go alone, so Joey offered to go with them. "Charlie explained.

"So… that means she has forgiven her mother?"

"No, it's not that simple. I think that Joey is torn over this, she wants to, but there is just too much history, it's not like you can forgive and forget just like that. She just wants to be there for Tara and Tom. They want to establish a new relationship with her and I totally get that, I just hope she doesn't go back to her old ways… Joey would be crushed if she did." Charlie aired her concern, she wasn't totally convinced that Lily's changes ways would last.

"Well, I hope she continues to make progress and be more and more accepting. I like d what that pastor said; don't judge people, love them. If all pastors said that…" Ruby smiled, and sipped her coffee.

"I thought about inviting Lily to the wedding, since she is family, do you think that I should?" Ruby looked at her sister.  
"I think that has to be your decision, but maybe it would be good, letting her see what a loving family is supposed to be… Maybe you should air it for Leah though, this isn't easy for her, she really struggles. "

Ruby nodded, "Yeah, I'll talk with her, I think it's more important that Leah has a good time than Lily…" She paused, "total change of subject… I don't mean to pry, but how is Joey doing, she hasn't looked like her normal self in a long time."

"I know, she is tired, and her back is causing her trouble. I think she has too much on her. She didn't want to work at all at least for the first six months, but she has to be down there from time to time, and two kids here… And Tara, Tom and their mother. It's emotional and physical draining. It's nothing to worry about."

Charlie stared into her cup, she was a little worried, Joey hadn't been herself in months. She was tired all the time, her back hurt and she didn't eat much. When she thought about it, she started to get tired around the time Rebecha was born. That took away the concern, she was tired because of the extra responsibilities.

* * *

Joey, Tara and Tom was walking home from Lily, Joey was pushing Jordan in his stroller. They had an ok time with her, but Joey felt that she couldn't relax around her. She always waited for an outburst, it was kind of unnerving.

Tara and Tom was walking in front of her, happily chatting away. She was happy for them, they both thrived. Lily had offered both of them to come and stay with her, but both had refused, at least for now. Tom loved staying at Leah's, she had opened up both her house and heart for him, and he felt like VJ was a brother.

Leah was happy to have Tom, she didn't trust Lily and she was relieved when the CPS had given the ok for him to continue staying with her. Leah avoided Lily as much as she could, there was just no way she could treat her with respect after everything she had put Joey through. In her eyes Lily didn't deserve Joey and it would take more than a few sorry's to convince her that she had changed.

Tara on her side, had no intention of leaving Joey and Charlie, she was too happy with them. Charlie and Joey both liked to have her, so it was ok with them.

As they were walking Joey felt a twitch in her back, since the day a couple of months earlier, when she had hauled gear for the 'Blaxland' She would get periods with severe pain in her lower back and pelvic, but most of the time it passed quickly. It had to be from pulling something lifting all that gear. She leaned on the handle or the stroller waiting for the pain to release her, slowly it lifted and she continued walking, catching up with Tara and Tom.

* * *

"Charlie," Joey was in the bedroom, calling for her. Rebecha had barfed all over her and she had to change clothes.

"yeah?" Charlie smiled at her and leaned up against the doorpost. Joey was just wearing a bra and was struggling with her pants. She liked what she saw.

Joey looked at her and grinned at her expression. "I take a rain check on that!" She gave her a cheeky grin. "Ruby and Jordan are waiting for us with dinner." She walked over to her and gave her a soft kiss. She stepped back again.

"Seriously, I called you because I wondered if I have gained weight, I can't get my pants on." She pulled out the lining on the pants, showing her that they didn't meet. "I have used quite loose fitting pants for a while, but…"She trailed of, she felt stupid as she was standing, showing that she didn't fit in her own clothes.

Charlie studied her, if anything had happened she had lost weight, she walked over to her and let her hands stroke over her back and her ribs. "Well… if I should say anything, I would say that you have lost weight… have you checked on the scale?"

"No, I have no idea what I way in the first place, so that wouldn't tell me anything." Joey frowned, she didn't like the idea of gaining weight, she was very comfortable the way she was. She quickly got out of the pants and found another pair. She frowned at Charlie giggling at her.

Charlie caught her in her arms as she attempted to walk past her. "You know I'll love you no matter what you look like, you'll always be the most sexy girl in the world to me!"  
Joey put her arms around her middle and found her lips, "I appreciate that, but I intend to stay just the way I am!"

They walked and joined Ruby and Jordan at the table. "Joey, has Charlie told you that she'll let me borrow her dress for my wedding? I'm so excited!" Ruby was glowing.

Joey giggled, "You'll look gorgeous Ruby, I can't wait, I'm so happy for you!" She reached across the table and patted her arm.

"Are you talking wedding again, do you want me to go?" Aden came through the door smiling. "Don't you dear walk out!" Ruby frowned at him, but it quickly dissolved into a grin. Aden walked over and kissed her. Charlie and Joey looked at them amused. Aden Joined them at the table. He leaned into Ruby and whispered something in her ear, she shook her head.

Both of them turned to face Charlie and Joey. "I don't know if you have noticed that one important part of the wedding is missing?" Ruby started. They both shook their head.  
"Well, every wedding needs a maid of honor and a best man, so… we wondered if you Charlie would be my maid of honor?" Ruby grinned at her sister.

"Of course I want to, I love to be!" Charlie opened her arms and pulled Ruby in for a hug.

"Well, I wondered if you would be mine Joey?" Aden grinned at her. Joey stared at him in shock. "Me… Are you sure, you don't want a guy?"

"No, I think my 'best man' should be my best friend, and that's you!" Joey jumped up and landed on his lap, giving him a kiss on the cheek. "I love to be your 'best man', can I wear a suit?"

"No way, you are not coming to my wedding in a suit, I think you have a perfect dress in your closet!"

* * *

Tara was walking down the beach, It had been a great day. It had been nice to see Lily, she didn't say anything about her sexuality, and Tara was grateful. She had no intention discussing it with her mother, just as long as she didn't hassle her, she was satisfied.

She looked at the woman walking beside her, she was gorgeous. They had met in Yabbie creek, and it had just been something there. The woman turned and looked at her, catching her eyes. She stopped her and turned to face her, their bodies almost touching.

"So… do you want to come home with me tonight?" Tara looked at the slightly older, blond woman asking her the question. She put her arms around her middle and pulled her closer. The other woman put her arms around her neck and kissed her. "I want you to, I think I'm falling in love with you Tara!" Tara grinned and kissed her back. They had been taking things slow for nearly three months and finally they were going somewhere. "I would like to, I just have to send Charlie and Joey a text… I think I' falling in love with you too, Nicole!"

* * *

"This has been a great day, I really look forward to the wedding, I love the idea that the two of us are made of honors for them." Joey snuggled up with Charlie. "Yeah, I love that I'm my sister's maid of honor, like she was to me, it feels so right… And I love to see you in the blue dress again!" Charlie rolled on top of Joey, "Do you want to take that rain check now?"

Joey giggled and placed her hands on Charlie's head and pulled her down to kiss her. Their tongues met and passion built on the inside. Hands explored and they relished in the feeling of each other. Hips moved against each other, both of them wrapped up in the sensation they gave each other.

Suddenly Joey felt the pain in her back, she opted to ignore it, the feeling of Charlie's hands and body soon drowned out the pain. She let her hand run down Charlie's body, coming to a rest at her center. She felt Charlie doing the same, she moved to meet her touch, when the pain came back. She tried to ignore it and concentrate on Charlie's fingers moving inside of her. The pain became excruciating, She grabbed a hold of Charlie' shoulders, pushing her off. "Charlie, you got to stop, please, it hurts so bad… Charlie stop!"

Charlie froze, she saw tears streaming down Joey's temples. "What's wrong?" She rolled off her and lifted her hand to wipe her tears away. She saw her fingers covered in blood. She just stared, looking from her hand to Joey who also stared at her hand. "Joey, this is not the time for your period…"  
Joey shook her head.

"What's wrong?" Charlie got up to go to the bathroom to wash off, and tried to get Joey up too. "Sorry, I have to wait for a little, my back hurts…"  
Charlie chewed on her lower lip before she rushed into the bathroom and came back just seconds later, cleaned up.  
"Joey, there has to be something wrong, you don't bleed just like that for no reason, and you don't have pain when we make love for no reason either…" Charlie felt herself grow increasingly worried. She looked down at Joey curled together like a ball.

"Tomorrow, we'll go and see Rachel!" Charlie lay down behind her and formed her body after Joey's.


	50. Chapter 50

Joey sat fidgeting on her chair in Rachel's office, waiting for her to join them. They had just called and Rachel had squeezed them in. She was just attending to another patient before she could see them.

She didn't want to be there. Charlie had insisted, even though the pain from the night was gone. If she was honest with herself, she had to admit that she had a feeling that something was wrong. She looked at Charlie sitting beside her, chewing on her lip. Charlie turned to her, "Joey, we should have done this a long time ago, I know you have been tired and had back pain. You haven't been yourself in ages… I blamed it on the extra stress with Rebecha…"

"Charlie, I'm sure I pulled something on the boat… but… I'm scared…"Joey ended the sentence in a whisper.  
"Joey, I'm sure there's nothing serious, Rachel will find out in no time." She put her arms around Joey's shoulder just as Rachel entered through the door.

"Hi girls, just sit."She motioned them down when they started to rise. "Did you get a baby sitter?" She smiled at them as she sat down in the chair on her side of the desk.

"Yes, Ruby and Tara is the designated sitters, they are doing a great job with the kids." Joey tried to settle her fidgeting hands. Charlie reach over and put hers on top, giving them a squeeze, Joey gave her a smile.

Rachel was flipping through some papers. She put them down and looked at them. "So, last night was the first time you suffered pain when you where together, and it was the first time you bled between periods?"

"I've had pain in my lower back and pelvic before, but not when we have… been together, last night, it was so bad that I had to make her stop. I didn't know that I was bleeding before…"

"It was blood on my hand." Charlie finished for her. Rachel nodded and made notes. "Joey, it's nothing to be ashamed of, I'm a doctor, I know all this kind of stuff." She gave Joey a reassuring smile.

"Have you had back pain for long?"

"No… I think the first time was right before Rebecha was born, I think I pulled something hauling some equipment…"

"What does it feel like and how often do you have it?"

"It feels like someone takes my lower back and twist it, almost like severe cramps, or put a vice around my back and hips. Usually it passes quickly, but sometimes it last for hours. How often? I'm not sure , it varies…"

"I think it's almost every day, I can see it on her…" Charlie added.

"Anything else?"

"I'm really tired all the time, I guess it's because of the added responsibility…" Joey didn't like what she heard herself say, she hadn't felt good for the last few months.  
"Yeah, she sleeps a lot more than she used to" Charlie filled in again.

"I didn't fit into my jeans yesterday…" That was a little embarrassing to tell.  
"She asked me if she had gained weight, but I think if anything she has lost." Charlie tried to stay calm, but seeing all the pieces together was unnerving.

"Well, that's easy to find out, we weighed you on your physical before you went to the sperm bank. It's a few years back, but you have been the same size all the time?" Rachel shuffled through her papers again. Joey nodded.

"Ok, here it is, just get on those scales, and we'll have an idea where you're at." Joey followed orders. Rachel got silent as she saw the number.  
"Joey… you have lost almost five kilos, that's a lot considering you're so slender… can you take your top off and lay on the stretcher, I want to feel your stomach."

Joey looked at Charlie with fright in her eyes, Charlie pulled her up on her feet and helped her get the top off. She stood beside her and held her hand. Laying flat on a hard surface made it easy to see that she was thinner, except from her lower abdomen, she looked a little bloated.

Charlie looked at Rachel working her fingers across the upper part of her abdomen, she asked Joey to say when it hurt. She continued down and when she pressed Joey whimpered in pain. Rachel continued her examination with smaller movements and more thorough. She went back and forth, up and down, locating where it hurt most.

She turned to make some notes, "Ok, you can get up now." She turned back and realized that Joey was squirming in pain, she rolled over on her side and curled up like a ball.  
"Joey, I'm so sorry, I'll get you some painkiller, I'll be right back." Rachel disappeared out the door.

Charlie looked at her helplessly, she leaned over her and held her, it was all she could do. Rachel was back only a minute later with a syringe. "This is an effective drug, it'll work within minutes," She gave Joey the injection. It didn't take long before the pain receded and Joey uncurled herself. Both Charlie and Rachel were looking concerned at her.

"Is it this bad all the time?" Rachel was thinking something she didn't want to think.

Joey shook her head, "I don't know… it's getting worse…"  
"It was like this yesterday, maybe even worse…"Charlie was scared.

Rachel looked at her, "I need to ask a few more questions." She walked over to her desk to get her papers, she continued her questioning standing beside Joey.  
"Has there been any change in your period?"  
"It's more painful, and heavier."

"What about appetite?"  
"I don't have one…"  
"Any trouble breathing?"  
"When the pain attacks comes…"  
"Toilet habits?"  
I don't know, I feel like I have to pee a lot more than before."

Charlie listened as Rachel asked her questions, she knew enough about interviewing that she recognized that Rachel had a suspicion of what was wrong. Rachel sat down on the edge of the stretcher looking at her paper, everything pointed to one thing, except for her age. She chewed on her lip, she didn't like what she saw.

Charlie couldn't take it any longer. "You know what it is, don't you?" Both Charlie and Joey stared at her. Joey tried to sit up, but she was dizzy from the medication. Rachel lifted the head end of the stretcher so that she could sit. Charlie sat down beside her and put her arm around Joey's shoulders, Joey leaned into her, a scary word was swirling in her mind.

"I need to do some more tests, I'll set up an ultrasound right away." Rachel didn't want to say anything before she was reasonable sure of what it was.

"But you have an idea? I know you do."Charlie focused on her eyes, wanting to see behind them.

"Yes, I do suspect something, but please, let me do the ultrasound first." Rachel looked at them for a second, giving them time to nod. She disappeared out to get the machine.

Charlie held Joey tight, there was something haunting her mind, she cursed herself for brushing away Joey's fatigue and obvious signs that she wasn't herself.

Rachel came back, followed by a nurse with the ultrasound machine. The nurse expertly prepared the machine, before she fastened a blue sheet under the lining of Joey's pants, pushing them a little down. She lowered the head part of the stretcher so Joey was lying flat again. Rachel smiled and thanked her.

Rachel applied some gel, "I'm sorry Joey, but this will more than likely be a little uncomfortable, I have to put a little bit of pressure on, but I'll be a gently as I can."

Rachel was standing facing her with the screen of the machine out of sight from Charlie and Joey, they could only see the side and back. Both of them looked at Rachel's face, trying to see if she found anything. Her face never changed expression, she looked worried, as she had done since she examined Joey's abdomen.

"Look, I want to have a second opinion, I'll be right back." With that, she disappeared out the door again.

"I think… I think I have…" Joey mumbled.  
"No, don't say it!" Charlie interrupted her, "Wait to see what Rachel says, I know it's not…" Charlie trailed off, she couldn't finish the sentence. She wiped away tears threatening to run down her face. "Just wait, ok?"  
Joey closed her eyes and nodded, feeling Charlie holding her hand in a vice.

Rachel came in with another doctor, she didn't even introduce him before she stared to do the ultra sound again. The two doctors looked and pointed to the screen, talking low and only 'doctor-language'. Charlie and Joey didn't catch a thing of what they were saying. They just looked at the faces.

"Joey we want to extract some fluid, it will be a little painful, but it's necessary." Rachel disappeared again and came back with a scary looking syringe with a long needle. She cleaned of an area and while the other doctor guided the ultrasound, Rachel inserted the needle. Joey groaned, it was very uncomfortable.

They finished the examination quite fast, Rachel gave the syringe with some pinkish, watery looking fluid to the other doctor and he disappeared. Rachel gave Joey some paper to wipe the gel off, Charlie took it from her and did it. They worked in silence, Rachel looked through her papers again and made more notes as Charlie helped Joey up and helped her get her top on again.

"I just have to go over to the laboratory to get them to make the test ASAP. I'll be back as soon as I can, get yourselves a cup of coffee in the mean time." Rachel was out the door almost before she had stopped talking.

Joey was still dizzy but she made it over to the chair supported by Charlie. They sat down holding onto each other's hands. They both worried, just the fact that Rachel was in such a hurry to get the tests done told them that something was terribly wrong.  
"Coffee?" Charlie asked, Joey nodded, she really didn't want one, but it would provide some distraction.

Charlie came back with two cups, they sat in silence, both having thoughts they didn't like. They didn't know what to say that wouldn't reveal their concern for the other, so they just sat there.

---

Rachel held a piece of paper in her hand, it confirmed her diagnosis. She leaned her head on the door and closed her eyes. On days like this she hated her job. She opened the door, walked over to her chair and sat down facing them.

Rachel looked at the two in front of her, they were among her best friends, she had been there in good times and bad. She hated that she was a part of this. She wrecked her brain to find a way to tell them what she knew. She closed her eyes for a second and took a deep breath, there was only one thing to do, tell the truth.

"Joey, there is no easy way to say this. I just want you both to know that I'm here for you, always, night or day…" She could see that she only made it worse with what she was saying.

"I have cancer, don't I?" Joey whispered.


	51. Chapter 51

Cancer, the word seemed to explode in Charlie's mind. "No… no… you're wrong, she can't have… no…" Charlie couldn't see a thing for the tears welling up in her eyes. She wiped her eyes and looked at Joey, she sat hunched over with her elbows on her knees, staring into the floor.

She grabbed Joey and pulled her over on her lap, Joey straddled her. She put her arms around her and buried her face in her neck. Charlie felt her tears on her skin, she cried, holding her tight.

Rachel was heartbroken, she had her own tears running down her face. She excused herself and went out to the reception to cancel the appointments for the rest of the day and asked not to be disturbed. She grabbed glasses, water and a box of tissues before she returned to her office.

She took a few deep breaths before she opened the door and went inside. She couldn't hold back her tears. She placed glasses in front of them and filled them with water. She put the box of tissues down too. She pulled up a few for herself before she sat down. She picked up the papers again, an ultrasound couldn't tell for sure if the growths was cancerous or none cancerous. The fluid sample she had extracted could. It was cancer, no doubt.

She put her papers down. Her head was already spinning with everything that need to be done, but right now it was only one thing that mattered and that was to be there for them.

Joey lifted her head from its hiding place, gave Charlie a kiss and moved over to her own chair, but with hands still latched together with Charlie's. She looked at Rachel, "What… what type is it?"

"It's epithelial ovarian cancer, you have tumors in your right ovary. It's one main tumor, and a few small ones, we have to set you up for surgery as soon as possible. We'll do a laparotomy which is exploratory surgery and we'll do a debulking, which means that we remove as much of the tumors as we can"

"What… "Joey stopped and took a deep breath. "What is the prognosis?"

"I can't say before we have done a CT, the surgery and we need to do a chest X-ray… The prognosis depends on whether you have metastases or not. There was cancer cells in the fluid sample I took…You are young and fit though, most people who get this type of cancer is over fifty, but younger people can get it too. We start you on chemo right after surgery. Joey I promise you, we'll do everything we can."

"But I haven't been that sick… and…doesn't it take time for tumors to grow? I've only felt off for two-three months."

"I'm sorry, Joey, ovarian cancer doesn't give much symptoms in the early stages, that's why it's called the silent kill…" Rachel stopped herself

Joey looked at her, she felt like she was doomed. Charlie sat beside her trying to comprehend what Rachel said. The silent killer…. No way was she going to let Joey die on her.

"When can the treatment start?" Charlie focused on how to get rid of this.

"I think we could have the surgery ready in two to four days, I recon you would like to have it done here?"  
Joey nodded, she certainly wouldn't go any other place.

"I'll call for a gynecologic oncologist from the city to come, we give you some days to recover and then start you on chemo."

"The wedding, Charlie we can't ruin Ruby's wedding," Joey almost panicked. "It's on Saturday, I got to be there, I don't want to destroy their happiest day. Please, can we do it after?"

Rachel looked at her, she saw where she was coming from. "I can get the surgeon to come next Monday, three, four days won't make any difference. That means you have to come in on Sunday, and I set you up for all the tests that we need during this week. I' m sorry, but you will spend a lot of time here in the nearest future."

She looked at them, they both looked distressed, she decided to give them some time to themselves.

"Do you need some time to yourselves?" both of them nodded in response.

"Stay here for as long as you like, I have canceled my appointments for the rest of the day, take your time." Rachel rose and left them to it.

Charlie looked at Joey, she seemed so small and vulnerable, she just wanted to hold her. She grabbed her hand and pulled her over to the stretcher, "I want to hold you, and there is no comfortable place in here, this is the best I can think of." She lay herself on her side, pulling Joey down too. She put her arm under her head, the other around her middle and a leg over her hip, pulling her as close as she could.

Joey put her free arm over Charlie's and one leg in between hers, it was impossible to get closer. They lay face to face, feeling each other's breath. They kissed and the sweet taste mingled with the salty taste of tears.

"I'm scared Charlie" Joey whispered.

"I know, I am too… How long have you suspected that you have…"

"I don't know, I think I just knew today, when she asked me those questions… they made a picture… I didn't try to hide anything from you."

"I know, I knew all those things, and you told me about the back pain and the tiredness, I just thought it was a natural consequence of added responsibility…"

They lay in each other's embrace seeking comfort.  
"I think we should wait to tell the others until after the wedding…"

"Joey, how on earth are we going to keep this a secret? Ruby will kill us when she finds out we didn't tell her. Joey I can't lie, I know how a lie can ruin your life. We should tell everyone right away and let Ruby and Aden decide if they want to go ahead with the wedding or not."

"I just don't want to ruin their day, it's supposed to be the best day of their life…"

"I know, but think about how they'll feel about their day when we reveal afterwards that you are sick, that will ruin every memory they have of the day, we can't do that to them." Charlie tried to make her see sense.

"You sure?"

Charlie nodded.

"Then I think we should tell everyone at once, I don't want to keep repeating it over and over again."

"Ok, we'll invite everyone over tonight, we can ask Rachel to come too, she can answer questions better than we can… but, if it's ok with you, I think we should tell Ruby and Leah first. Maybe we could call them and ask them to come here, now."

"I can't think, if you think that's the best way to do it, it's ok by me, but not yet, I just need to lay here with you for a bit." Joey buried her head in Charlie's chest and let silent tears run, it didn't take long before the painkillers made her drift into sleep.

Charlie held her, feeling her ribcage slowly rise and fall. She had large tears run down her temple and into her hair. She could hardly control herself, it was so unfair, all the things that had happened in Joey's life, everything she had overcome and now this. She sighed, her breath shaking, they were together in this too. She closed her eyes and forced herself to breathe in the same pace as Joey, it took some time, but finally it calmed her down and she fell asleep too.

* * *

Rachel eased the door to her office open, her eyes fell on the two sleeping on the stretcher. Her eyes welled up with tears. She walked over, looking down at them. Charlie stirred, opened her eyes and saw her. "Rachel, can you call Ruby and Leah and get them to come here? Oh, and Aden too, we need to tell, them." Charlie whispered. She felt like the weight of the world was pressing her down.

Rachel placed her hand on her cheek, "Of course I will." Charlie closed her eyes and drifted back into sleep again.

* * *

Ruby , Leah and Aden came rushing into the reception area, Ruby was carrying Rebecha in her car-seat. They saw Rachel sitting on a chair, staring at nothing, she had a cup of coffee in her hands that looked like she had forgotten. They walked over to her, it took a few seconds before she registered them.

"You're here… Good." She lifted the cup she was holding, grimacing as the cold, stale coffee hit her tongue.

"What's going on? Why did we need to drop everything and come here?" Leah asked the question all of them thought.

"You know that Charlie and Joey came in here this morning?"

Ruby and Aden nodded, Leah looked confused.

"Well, they did… Let me just go and see if they are ready for us." Rachel disappeared down the hall with three pairs of eyes burning in her back. She knocked on the door, opened and was revealed that both of them were awake, sitting side by side on the stretcher.

"They are here, we have a family room we can go to, more space and places to sit…" She motioned to them to walk first and she followed behind them.

Ruby saw the ash grey, tear stained faces of the two walking towards her. She felt a stone fall into her stomach, she knew something was terribly wrong. She wasn't the only one, all three of them felt their hearts drop.

They stopped in front of them, Charlie saw that Ruby had brought Rebecha, she was relieved. They had been in the hospital for hours, and she was getting increasingly uncomfortable. She picked her up and held her close, new tears ran down her face.

Ruby looked at her with dread. "What's wrong?"

Rachel stepped up beside Charlie and Joey, "We have a family room down the hall, let's go there and talk." She led the way down the hall, opening a door to a room none of them had been in. It was simple, with two couches and a few chairs. Rachel motioned for them to take a seat. Aden and Ruby sat in one couch, Charlie and Joey in the other and Leah sat in a chair.

Charlie took the opportunity to feed Rebecha, holding her with one arm, clutching Joey's hand with the other. Joey felt tears run again as she looked at Charlie with the baby, it was so natural and ordinary in a situation that was as far away from ordinary and natural you could come.

Ruby looked at them ,she was beyond scared. "Can someone please tell us what's going on? You scare me…"

Joey looked from Charlie to Rachel, not wanting to tell, but at the same time knowing that she had to. Rachel sat beside her on the couch, putting an arm round her shoulder just for a second. The three others watched, not knowing what to think. Rachel let her go and Joey turned and glanced at Charlie, she took a deep breath. She had to tell.

"Ruby… Aden… Leah," Joey looked at all three of them in turn, fighting to keep her voice steady. "I… you know I haven't been myself for the past few months?"

They all nodded.

"Something happened last night, it was scary and we decided that I needed to see Rachel today. That's what we have been doing. It turns out that…" Joey couldn't hold back her tears, "I… I…" She couldn't continue, Ruby rose and knelt in front of her. She looked from her sister to Joey and back again. Charlie was shaking from suppressed crying, she had let go of Joey's hand and held her hand in front of her eyes.

Joey was leaning her elbows on her knees, crying as Rachel stroke her over her back. Ruby grabbed both her hands. "Joey, you got to tell, I'm scared."  
Leah joined Ruby, "Joey, please, Ruby is not the only one scared."

Joey looked at them kneeling in front of her, she took a deep, shaky breath, "I… I…I have cancer"

"What?" Three people stared at her in disbelief.

"That's way I've been so tired and had the back pain." She buried her head in her arms, sobbing. Leah stroke her over her back, staring at Rachel, hoping she would tell that it wasn't true. She saw the compassion and sorrow in Rachel's eyes, it slowly sunk in that this was real.

Ruby was shocked, she didn't know what to do. She looked at her sister that moved Rebecha over to the other breast. She could hardly move, she was using all her force to suppress her crying. Ruby wanted to comfort her. Charlie saw that she moved to touch her. "No Ruby, don't, I got to feed Rebecha." She could hardly speak. Ruby nodded, she understood.

She rose from the floor, walking over to the window staring out, She couldn't believe what she just heard, she tried to get her mind around it. She felt arms around her, she turned and found herself in Joey's embrace. She put her arms around her and held her tight, "There has to be a mistake…"  
She could feel Joey shaking her head.  
"No, there has to be a mistake, you can't tell that someone has cancer in the matter of hours."

Joey shook her head again, "Ruby, it's true, everything shows that it is, I'm sorry." Ruby broke down and started to cry. She clung tight to Joey, digging her hipbone into her stomach, it hurt. "Ruby… you got to loosen your grip... "Joey struggled with her hands as she panted for air. "Ruby…"

Aden rushed over and took a hold of Ruby's hands and forced her to let go, he placed her arms around himself instead, letting her cry in his arms. Joey hunched over and panted for air. Rachel was by her side and held her around the ribs for support. "Are you ok?" Rachel was concerned, it looked like she had one more thing to thick of her symptom list.

Joey nodded, she kept panting for a little while before she stretched, "I'm ok, she just squeezed a little too hard." She sat back down on the couch again. Charlie was just finishing feeding the baby, she silently asked Rachel to burp her. She was the most collected person in the room. "If it's ok with you I get a nurse to take care of her, She'll be fine."

Charlie nodded. Rachel held Rebecha to her shoulder and went to find a nurse, she came back a few minutes later. The scene that met her was heartbreaking; Ruby was locked around Aden, sobbing quietly into his chest. Leah was pacing back and forth and Joey was sitting with her butt in the couch and her legs over Charlie's, leaning into her side with her head on her shoulder. Charlie had her hands wrapped around her.

Leah stopped her pacing and turned to Rachel. "What type of cancer is it?"  
"It's ovarian."  
"How can you be so sure that it's cancer, I guess you haven't had time to do a biopsy yet."

"No, we haven't, but I did take a fluid sample, it had cancer cells in it. The symptoms and the ultrasound, a noncancerous growth has well defined edges, nice and smooth. This isn't, and she has more than one, it's a possibility that it has spread to the tube… We don't need a biopsy to be sure…"

Joey just vaguely heard the conversation taking place in the room, she thought about Charlie, Jordan, Rebecha. She didn't need some biopsy to tell her that Rachel was right, she knew it, she could feel it. She couldn't hold back a sob. Charlie held her closer, Joey could feel her tears hitting her forehead.

"Charlie I'm so sorry, I hate to make you feel like this." Joey lifted her head and looked into her eyes, they were filled with pain.  
"Joey, it's not your fault, you didn't give yourself this. I'm just so…" Charlie couldn't believe that Joey blamed herself.  
"You're just scared… confused… angry… helpless…"

"Yes, I'm all of those things and more. I just don't know what to do…"  
"Just hold me…"

---

Ruby finally started to settle down, her mind started to work again. She lifted her head from where it had been buried and looked around the room. She saw her sister holding Joey half way on her lap, resting her head on Joey's with her eyes closed. She saw Rachel standing with Leah in her arms, staring out the window over her head. She looked at Aden sitting with one hand in front of his mouth and the other around her. They all tried to deal with the news.

She took a deep breath, "When will the treatment start?"


	52. Chapter 52

Charlie and Joey found it surreal to see their friends sitting in their living room. They felt like they were inside a bubble, observing, but not being a part of the rest of the world. Their friends were chatting happily together, Leah, Robert and VJ was there, Martha and Hugo, Rachel and Tony, Morag, Tom, Ruby and Aden. Those who knew kept on a happy face, they were just waiting for Tara.

Charlie and Joey walked into the kitchen, embracing each other. "We can do this Honey!" Charlie kissed Joey's forehead, she nodded.

"I mean all of it." Charlie cupped her face with her hands, making her look into her eyes, they both had tears welling up, making it hard to see each other. The sound of feet walking up the front stairs and laughter interrupted them.

Tara opened the door followed by Nicole. Tara froze when she saw the serious faces looking at her. "What, is something wrong?

"Tara, we're just waiting for you…" Joey looked at her sister standing with Nicole right behind her. "Nicole, what are you doing here? I mean nice to see you…"

Tara blushed and Nicole giggled. "Well, do you remember that time in the Surfclub, when you asked me out?" Nicole wasn't the one beating around the bush. "I told you that if I was into girls, you would totally be my type?"

"No, I don't…"

"Well, I was really tempted to say yes, after that girl kissed me at school, I was curious. Well, since then I've figured that I'm bi. I met Tara, there was something about her, and we have been dating for almost three months, taking it slow, see what happened." Nicole grinned at the expression on Charlie and Joey's faces.  
"We're in love…" Tara finished.

Charlie and Joey looked at each other and to the couple in front of them and back at each other. They gave each other a little smile and shrugged their shoulders, as long as the two was happy.

"Nice to see you again Nicole," Charlie let go of Joey and gave her a hug. "We have our friends here, we have something we need to tell everyone. Nicole since you're together with Tara you should be here too."

Ruby came into the kitchen, she smiled as she saw Nicole and Tara standing a little too close. "I knew it! I knew that it wasn't a coincident that both of you had met someone… taking it slow… see what happened. So it did happen!" Ruby was happy for them, but there were more important things on her mind.

She turned to Charlie and Joey, "Can we please just do this, keeping the facade is killing me." She lifted her hands and rubbed her face.

"There is something wrong…" Tara remembered the expression on Charlie's and Joey's faces when they entered, the expression was back. "Tara, Nicole, just join the others in the living room, we'll be right there." Ruby motioned for them to go. Tara looked at them for a second before she left the kitchen with Nicole.

* * *

Charlie looked at the people sitting around them. Rachel, Tony and Morag on the couch, Martha and Hugo on the floor. Leah and Robert in a chair, Aden had Ruby on his lap in another. Tom, VJ, Tara and Nicole sat on the floor.

All eyes were fixed on her, everyone wondered what this was about, it wasn't often they all were gathered at the same time. It was nice to catch up, but everyone had noticed the strange behavior of the residents of the house. Looking at Charlie now made them slightly worried.

Charlie took a better hold of Joey, they were squeezed together in an armchair. "Rachel, Leah, Ruby and Aden already know this. We decided to tell them earlier today…" Charlie stopped, she didn't know how to tell, what to say. She wondered if this was a bad idea, they hadn't even had the chance to process the news on their own yet. At the same time it was better to just get it over with, it wouldn't be easier if they waited.

"I have cancer," Joey blurted out. She was tired and suddenly fed up with the whole thing. Nine pairs of eyes stared at her in shock, four pairs in misery.

"What?" Martha's voice was trembling, she remembered too well how her own battle with cancer had been.

Joey jumped up from the chair, "I have cancer, I don't fucking want to have cancer. I just want a happy, normal life, is that really too much to ask?" She was almost screaming. She hid her face in her hands, shaking as she turned away from them. Charlie got up and gathered the shaking body in her arms, Joey slipped her arms around her and cried.

The others stared at the couple in shock. "Are you sure?" The question came from Tara who clung to Nicole, she was scared.

"We're sure." Rachel answered, she was struggling with her own tears, Tony put his arm around her shoulder. He knew this was hard for her, Joey and Charlie was among their closest friends. He found it extremely difficult too, he was a man of action, he liked to fix things with his hands. When it came to things like this, he found it hard to deal with, he wanted to see what he was up against.

Martha felt pain from her own cancer flow over her. It was years ago, but she could still feel what the chemo did to her body like it was yesterday. The awful feeling of losing her hair, the nausea, the freezing, the muscle pain.  
"What type is it, when will the treatment start, and what kind of treatment will she have?" Martha felt a connection to Joey, she had been through this, she wanted to be there for her.

"It's epithelial ovarian cancer, she'll have a laparotomy and a debulking, followed with an intensive round of chemo." Rachel understood why Martha was so keen to know, she had been her doctor too.

"When is the surgery?"

"First they wanted to have it next Monday, because of our wedding Saturday," Ruby answered, she looked at Aden for a second before she turned to the others, she quickly brushed away some tears. "We have decided to postpone the wedding."

No one needed an explanation why.

"I have talked to the surgeon, Joey, Charlie," Rachel turned to the couple who were still standing, holding each other. "I haven't had a chance to tell you, but the surgeon is coming tomorrow and the procedure will be done Wednesday morning."

Charlie and Joey looked at her. "I'm sorry, that means you have to be in early tomorrow, we have a ton of tests to do, but the sooner the better."

Joey looked at her, she felt like all her energy had drained out of her. It felt like getting the diagnosis had made her a hundred times sicker. "I'm just going to bed." She turned and left them.

"I have to be with her, but just sit here and talk, Rachel can answer your questions. When do you want us tomorrow?" Charlie felt dead on her feet, and she had desperate need to be with Joey.  
"Nine is perfect, and no food for her." Rachel rose and gave her a hug, wishing there was something she could do to ease the burden.

* * *

Thirteen people sat in the living room, none of them knowing what to say. Nicole had her arm around Tara's shoulders, Tom and VJ sat on the floor in front of Leah and Robert, leaning back against their knees, Leah stroke Tom over his hair. Morag sat with an elbow on the armrest of the couch, covering her mouth with her hand. Tony had his arm around Rachel. Ruby sat on Aden's lap and Martha was leaning up against Hugo.

"Is she going to die?" Tom tried to hide the tears escaping his eyes. Everybody turned and looked at Rachel.

"We have to do the surgery and tests…" Rachel didn't know what to say, she couldn't say no and she couldn't say yes.

"So she is going to…" Tara whispered, she did not try to hide her tears.

"Look guys, I can't say. We have to do the surgery, the CT all that kind of stuff. Everything depends on how early we found it. Joey is young, she is fit and healthy, she'll fight." Rachel tried to sound optimistic.

"Isn't ovarian cancer the fifth leading cause of death from cancer in women?" Martha thought she remembered something like that when she had researched her own cancer. She didn't like the thought.

"It is, but ovarian cancer has five stages, and most commonly affects people post menopause. That Joey is young gives her a great advantage, it all depends on what stage the cancer is in." Rachel knew very well that the sooner they discovered the cancer the better, she prayed that they had found it early.

"Do you know what stage she has?" Morag asked, this was her family and she deeply cared for Joey, and she had a need to know all the facts, a result of being a lawyer and judge. She was used to assessing a case based on all accessible evidences.

"No, we know that she has passed stage one, which would only required surgery. There were cancer cells in the fluid sample I took, she is at least at stage two, we won't know for sure before we have looked inside." Rachel looked at the devastated faces around her, she understood how they felt, but she felt a bigger burden.

She was the doctor, she had the responsibility for Joey's treatment. She wasn't an oncologist, and maybe it would be better for Joey to go to the city for treatment. She also knew that Joey would never do that, she hated hospitals, but trusted her.

Rachel prayed that she would be worthy that trust. She felt overwhelmed, she wasn't an expert, but Joey needed one. She was grateful that the oncologist from the city was so eager to help. With him on her side she felt she could do this, she wanted and needed to.

* * *

"Are you ok?" Nicole put her arms around Tara, letting her rest her head on her shoulder. Everyone had left, shocked and devastated by the news. Tara shook her head, "I don't get it, she is too young to have cancer, she hasn't been sick, I don't want my sister to die… I haven't spent enough time with her…"

"Tara, she is not going to die, you heard Rachel, you know how strong Joey is, she'll fight this." Nicole tried to encourage her.

"Yeah, I heard Rachel say that they don't know… Can you stay here tonight? I think I need you, just to be close to you."

Nicole tightened her grip around her, "Of course I'll stay!" She leaned her head back, trying to stop tears from escaping her eyes.

* * *

Martha walked home hand in hand with Hugo. She hated the thought of Joey going through the same as she had. She closed her eyes and relived the moment when she started to lose her hair. She had been working behind the bar in Noah's, lost something on the floor, and when she bent to pick it up she had stroked her hair back and was left with a handful of hair in her hand.

She had expected it, but the shock when it actually happened had been terrible. Joey would experience the same thing, she would be sick, in pain, struggling to eat. Martha wiped some tears away, she had wanted someone who knew what she went through, who understood to be there for her. Now she wanted to be that someone for Joey.

* * *

Tom and VJ sat by the kitchen table, Leah was fixing hot chocolate for them. Both of them tried to act like tough teenagers, but both of them failed miserably. VJ had known Joey since he was eight, she always had time for him. They started surfing together, she took him out fishing, she was the coolest friend he had. He always thought that he wanted a girl like Joey when he grew up.

Hearing that she was sick frightened him, he was scared of what would happen to her, he was afraid of losing her.

"Boys, she'll be all right, ok?" Leah gave them each a cup, they both glanced up at her before they concentrated on the cup she had just given them.

"Mum, you can't say that, you don't know better than the doctors!"

"No, but I know Joey!"


	53. Chapter 53

Charlie sat on a chair in the waiting area, Joey had been in surgery for almost three hours. She was exhausted, more from emotional strain than physical. They had taken Jordan to Stella, but Rebecha was with them. She was ten weeks old and Charlie still breastfed her, it was comforting and heartbreaking to have her close, having the new life in her arms, knowing that another life was at risk.

Joey had been admitted the day before, they had run what felt like hundreds of tests and taken what seemed like liters of blood from her. Charlie had stayed with her all the time, Ruby was there too, taking care of Rebecha, it was only the feeding she couldn't do.

Charlie stretched out on the row of chairs and put her arm over her eyes. She tried to be positive, but not knowing how bad it was made it hard. How much did they have to remove? Had it spread? How would she react to the chemo? Would she survive? She let out a little whimper, she couldn't allow herself to think like that.

She felt a hand on her arm, she removed it from her eyes and saw Rachel. She jumped up so fast that she almost blacked out. "How's she doing, what did you find?"

The others had seen Rachel and came over to them. Ruby, Aden, Leah, Tara, Tom and Martha, they all gathered in a half circle around, eager to hear the news.

Rachel took a deep breath, this wasn't easy. "She has cancer, stage two… it had spread to the tube." Charlie swayed, feeling like she could pass out for real this time. Rachel grabbed her arm and guided her down on a chair. She sat down beside her.

"The surgery went well… I assisted the surgeon, he is one of the best we have. We did a laparotomy, searching the organs for signs of cancer. We did a debulking, he decided to remove the right side ovary and fallopian tube. The main tumor was growing on the ovary but had spread to the tube. In a normal case he would have removed everything, but since she is so young he didn't want to take away the opportunity to have more kids.

We didn't see any metastases, neither on the CT nor during surgery, which is very good news. There are micrometastases, so we need to get her started on chemo as soon as possible."

Charlie leaned her elbows on her knee and hid her face in her hands. She didn't know what to say, it was bad news that was camouflaged as good news. She hated the feeling it gave her. She turned her head and looked at Rachel, she had to ask.

"Rachel… what is the prognosis?" Everyone held their breath, waiting for the answer they all was afraid to hear.

"For stage II, the five year survival rate is sixty to eighty percent. You have to remember that most women who get this type of cancer are over fifty. Joey isn't even thirty, she is fit and healthy, she has a very good chance." Rachel paused, glad to have some good news, but she didn't want them to think it would be walk in the park either.

"She is going to be very sick though, we want to hit the cancer hard with four to six cycles of chemo"

"What does that mean?" Charlie didn't have much knowledge of chemotherapy.

"It means that we'll give her biweekly rounds of chemo, one month is one cycle. We'll keep checking for cancer cells, most likely she'll need six cycles. There are side effects though, you need to be aware of that." Rachel looked at her, Charlie didn't face her. "There are risks of infections, because the chemo will attack her healthy cells. The chemo is nauseating, there's a huge risk of bleeding. She'll lose her appetite, experience pain, fatigue and she'll lose her hair."

"God, so if the cancer doesn't kill her, the chemo will?" Charlie was almost angry, she hated the thought of Joey having to go through all that.

"It's the only way to get rid of it. Chemo is terrible, but she has stage II, she has micrometastases. There is no way around it, but she will get through it. Her age, fitness level, she's strong, she'll be fine."

"Can I see her?"

Rachel nodded, "She's in the ICU, just you for now, the rest can see her later.

* * *

Charlie sat by Joey's bed, holding her hand. She thought back on all the occasions she had been sitting by her hospital bed. After Robbo attacked her in the court, after the second time he assaulted her, when she drank herself into oblivion. They had overcome everything, but this wasn't a visible enemy, it was her own body, and the only way to kill the bad guys was to kill her and hope that the bad guys would die first.

Charlie felt tears run down her cheeks again, she wondered if she ever would come to a point where she didn't have any tears left. It certainly didn't seem like she was going to lack any in the nearest future. She looked into the face of the woman she loved, her heart broke at the thought of what lay ahead.

Joey stirred and opened her eyes, the first thing she saw was Charlie looking back at her. "How are you feeling Honey?" Charlie asked her. "Like I have been cut open and had things removed," Joey tried to joke, but she hurt.

"Let me buzz for Rachel," Charlie reached for the buzzer. Joey caught her hand, "No, wait, I just want you to hold me a little, Can you?"  
Charlie bit her lower lip and nodded. She flipped of her shoes and crawled into bed with her, offering her arm as a pillow. Joey came to rest in the crook of her arm.

"Charlie, I just want you to know, that no matter what the outcome of this might be… I could never have found anyone better than you. You are my reason to live, you and our kids. I love you and I will do everything I can to fight this. Charlie, I want you to be happy, and if I don't…"

Charlie put her index finger on Joey's lips to make her stop talking. "Joey, I have spoken to Rachel, there's no way that I'm going to let you give up. There's only one thing that can keep me happy, and that's you. Joey, the prognosis are good, you'll be sick, but we'll get through this too."

* * *

Joey looked at Rachel preparing the IV, she looked at the bag with what seemed like innocent clear water hanging from the IV rack. She was scared, the bag that looked so innocent was about to make her sicker than she had ever been before. She was seated in a comfortable chair in a light, nice room, at the moment there were no other patients there, just her, accompanied by Charlie and Martha.

Rachel sat down beside her and put a tourniquet around her upper arm. "Ok, I'm just going to insert the IV-catheter and hook you up." Rachel smiled at her, trying to settle the nerves that was written all over her. She took a hold of her hand to insert it, Joey was shaking so badly that she couldn't hold her hand still. She put her hand down and loosened the tourniquet.

"Joey how are you feeling?" Rachel put the IV needle away and took her hand in both of hers. Charlie sat on Joey's other side and held that hand. They both looked at her with compassion in their eyes.

"I'm just so scared, I know I have to do it, but all I can think of is how sick I'm going to get from that stuff…I'm sorry I'm such a coward." She had tears in her eyes. Charlie lifted her hand and dried them off.

Martha came and sat down beside them, they looked at her. "I remember my first chemo, I was so scared. I was afraid I would drop dead there and then." Martha gave them a crocked smile.

"Yeah… I'm scared… I'm scared about what this stuff is going to do to me…" Joey pointed up at the bag.

" I know it's hard and you'll get sick… It won't last forever." Martha squeezed her hand.

Joey took a deep breath, "Just do it Rachel!"

Rachel started the procedure again, and got the IV line in place. She hooked her up to the bag hanging from the pole and set the infusion pump. "This will take about three hours, just relax, and if you feel discomfort around the IV, then buzz and we'll take care of that." Rachel smiled at her, gave her a blanket and got up to tend to other patients.

Joey leaned back and placed her head on Charlie's shoulder. She closed her eyes, it had been a week since the surgery, and she healed fine, but she was tired. Having a cancer diagnosis was more emotional draining than physical at the moment, but she had no doubt that would change.

She had been home for three days, it was wonderful to be out of hospital, cuddling with the kids. Jordan didn't understand why his mamy didn't pick him up and attended to him like she used to and that created some frustration. Ruby was a god sent, she always managed him.

Charlie, Ruby, Aden and she had talked. Ruby and Aden had decided to postpone the wedding indefinitely, but Joey didn't like the idea. She wanted to have hair and be reasonably healthy at their wedding and she didn't want them to wait for maybe as long as a year for that.

After some deliberation they had decided to have the wedding next Saturday, that would give her a little more than a week to recover from the first round of chemo. Ruby and Aden was happy with that, they looked forward to get married, knowing that a lot of strain was waiting for them. It would also be nice with a happy occasion in the middle of everything else.

Aden had finished their house, but they had decided to stay with them to help out. Both Charlie and she were incredible grateful, they didn't know what they would do without her. Tara was a great help too, taking care of Jordan when Ruby was at the hospital with them and Rebecha. Tara had a lot on her plate though, she had been offered some great opportunities to race, and all the training she did with the sailing took a lot of her time.

Joey snuggled closer into Charlie, she tried to feel the chemo going into her body, she couldn't feel a thing. She sighed, it still went in at it would do its work.

Charlie rested her chin on top of Joey's head, she looked at the bag hanging over her head, the line and the pump. She was scared, scared of how Joey would react to the chemo. They had talked a lot to Martha about her experience with cancer and she didn't like what she heard. She also knew that Joey got different drugs than what Martha was given, and these was extremely nauseating. Joey would be given antiemetics, which should control the vomiting, but no one could tell for sure how she would react to the drugs.

She wished she could take the chemo for Joey, it was so hard to see her go through it, and she had hardly started. She closed her eyes, as so many times the last week she was fighting her tears. She found this hard to deal with.

---

"Martha, when you had chemo, you were married to Jack, right?" Joey straightened herself a little, there was something that had crossed her mind.

"Yeah, actually we got married right after my surgery."

"Did… I'm sorry for asking this, and don't feel like you have to answer…"

"Just ask, if there's anything I can help you with…" Martha smiled at her. Charlie looked between the two of them, wondering were Joey was headed.

"I just wondered about… Did the two of you kiss and have sex while you were on chemo?" Joey blushed, but she wanted to know. Charlie was surprised, she hadn't even thought about that part.

"We kissed, but I didn't want him to see me, I had a breast removed, and I didn't feel like a woman any longer. I thought he would be disgusted, it took a long time before I showed him. For me it was so hard to adjust to everything, and my self-esteem was shattered, and then I got so sick that sex was not an issue. I think you have to talk to Rachel about…"

"Talk to Rachel about what?" Rachel just walked in the door as Martha finished talking. Martha turned and looked at her, "I said they should ask you about chemo and sex."

Rachel grinned and sat down beside them, it wasn't a surprising question coming from them. "It's no problem technically to have sex while being on chemo, Just not the first couple of days after a round, the chemo leaves the body through the different bodily fluids, but except from the first two days it's so little, it's no danger for Charlie.

The question is if you'll be up for it Joey, you'll be sick, tired and emotional. You'll experience a lot of psychological highs and lows, sex might not be on the top of your agenda. But if you want to and feel up for it, just go right ahead! Kissing is no problem either, as long as you want to."

"So as long as I feel like it, we can?" Joey just wanted to be sure. Rachel nodded. Joey turned to Charlie, "Well, that's what I call good news!"


	54. Chapter 54

_A/N. I just want to say thank you to all my readers, I know this story has taken a quite serious turn. When I decided to go this way, I also decided not to take the issue of cancer lightly. I have had family and friends with cancer, everyone in the same situation knows that cancer is a terrible thing. _

_I want to explore how Charlie and Joey cope with this, and the reactions of their family and friends. I don't know how it is for other writers, but I just have the basic idea and then the story unfolds as I write, so I find it interesting to see what the characters do, because a lot of times I don't know before I actually write…I'm probably weird…_

_The following chapters will be a bit emotional and sad. There will be insecurities and you wonder what will happen, because that is cancer for you, you don't always know what's gonna happen. But I'll put in good things too, like this chapter. Because life goes on, no matter what. _

_I'll try and keep up posting every day, but it's hard to write some of this stuff, so you just have to excuse me if I fail.  
Thank you for all you're reviews, they are much appreciated. I can't say I hope you enjoy, but I do hope you get something out of this. But for this chapter I can, so: Enjoy!_

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Ruby sat in front of the mirror in her bedroom, watching Nicole doing her hair. Her wedding day had come and it seemed stupid not to accept Nicole's offer of styling her.

She really looked forward to getting married, but at the same time, she was a little nervous. She didn't really know why, she just felt butterflies swarming her stomach. It felt good to know that she would belong to Aden, knowing that he would be there, love her and support her.

He had agreed to postpone moving into their house. Ruby wanted to stay with Charlie and Joey, helping them and be there for them. The house was only a few meters away, but to Ruby that was too far. She wanted to be available day and night. It hadn't been difficult to persuade Aden of staying, he wanted to be there for them just as much as she did.

A grin spread across her face as she thought about him. Nicole saw it in the mirror, "You're happy!" She grinned.

"I am, I'm getting married to the best man in the whole world!" Ruby put up a dreamy face and sighed. "He really is the greatest, most supportive, loving, amazing, sexy…"

"I get the picture!" Nicole laughed, "He was great before, but I have to say, he has just gotten better, starting to wonder where it will end!"

"What about you, are you happy with Tara? I have to admit, I never saw you as gay or bi or whatever back in school, even when that girl kissed you." Ruby looked at her in the mirror.

"I am happy, she is something special… That kiss back in school, I liked it. I kind of just ignored that part of me while I was living here, but when I moved to Melbourne I found myself in an environment where there was more gay people than straight. I broadened my horizon to put it that way, I'm attracted to both men and women, but not at the same time." Nicole giggled, "Tara though, I have never met anyone like her, it's like she touches my soul."

Ruby looked at her, "I'm happy for you, and it's great to have you here again, that you can be a part of this day. It doesn't hurt that you can make me into a supermodel either!"

* * *

"How are you feeling Honey?" Charlie put an arm around Joey, they were sitting on the porch, enjoying a cup of coffee before they had to get dressed.

"I'm actually feeling wonderful, and the coffee taste like coffee too!" Joey turned her head and gave Charlie a kiss. It was nine days since the chemo, and the only thing she had noticed from it was some queasiness and everything she ate and drank had tasted like metal.

She felt optimistic, life had almost gone back to normal. They played with the kids, visited friends, taken time to be together. The cancer had almost been a none topic, they wasn't ready to have it taking over their life, and it was easy to ignore since she was feeling so good.

It always lurked in the shadows tough, both of them aware that it wouldn't continue like this, neither willing to let that spoil the good time they had now.

* * *

Charlie knocked on the door to her little sister, Joey was in the shower, and Charlie wanted to see her sister before she became a married woman. She chuckled, it seemed like it was yesterday Ruby had surprisingly appeared in Summer Bay. Thrown out of boarding school, she had enrolled herself in the local school and moved in with her.

Charlie loved having her sister around, she had been a source of headache, frustration and anger, but she also was her greatest support, her confidante and friend. She had no idea what she would do without her. Ruby had always been there for her, and she still was.

She had tried to convince her of moving into Aden's and hers house. Ruby had refused, and Charlie had to admit she was revealed. Knowing that Ruby was around felt good, if something happened, she was there, ready to step in.

"Wow, is that my little sister?" Charlie looked at her as she entered the room. Ruby caught her eyes in the mirror and grinned. "Do I look all right?"

"Girl, you look more than all right, you look stunning!" She admired her, Nicole had done an outstanding job. She had put Ruby's hair up, but loose curls were hanging down. She had put tiny flowers in it and some glitter. The makeup was perfect and she had pearl droplets in her ears, matching the pearls in the dress.

"I promised I would help Joey too, so I leave you to it, I'm sure Charlie can help you with the dress!" Nicole gave Ruby's shoulder a squeeze before she left them to it.

"Imagine, my little sister is getting married!" Charlie walked up behind her, knelt down and put her arms around her neck. "You look amazing Rubs, Aden is one lucky man." She kissed her behind the ear. Ruby giggled, "I can hardly believe it myself, I'm so nervous, it's strange, because all I want to is marrying the guy."

"I was nervous when I married Joey too, I knew I loved her, and wanted to be with her for the rest of my life. I think it's a mandatory thing, you have to be nervous on your wedding day!" Charlie leaned her chin on her shoulder. "I love you so much Ruby, and I don't know what I would do without you. I don't think I would be here if it wasn't for you!" She felt tears threatening to escape her eyes.

"Don't cry yet sis, you are supposed to save that for the ceremony. Besides, if you cry, I'll cry too and ruin my makeup. I don't think Nicole will be too impressed if that happened." Ruby tried to joke away the tears burning behind her eyes. "I love you too sis, and I'll always be here for you!"

* * *

Aden walked down to the beach, a huge crowd was waiting for him, it looked like the whole Bay was out to attend the ceremony. He smiled, he was about to marry the girl of his dreams. He stopped and greeted every one, shaking hands, hugging and receiving some friendly punches to his shoulder.

He grinned when he saw Leah, walked over, and gathered her into a bear hug. "Wow, Aden, you look so good!" Leah said when he finally put her down. She straighten his already straight tie and brushed her hands over his tuxedo jacket, she had tears in her eyes. "I'm so happy for you."

He grinned back at her, "Thanks Leah, I'm happy too!" He continued to make his way to the front of the crowd and the awaiting vicar. He shook hands with him and turned to wait for the girls.

* * *

Ruby was sitting beside Charlie in the car, nervously fiddling with some pearls on the dress. Charlie parked the car and took her hands, "Don't ruin the dress Rubs!" She smiled at her.

"Sorry," She turned at gave her a half smile. "I'm just nervous, this is really it."

"It is, and in a few minutes you're going to feel like the luckiest woman alive!" Charlie leaned over and gave her a kiss on the cheek. Another car came and parked behind her. Nicole and Joey stepped out. "Ok, little sis, let's go!"

Ruby looked at the man waiting for her as she walked down the beach, her hand linked in Charlie's arm. Charlie would both give her away and be her maid of honor.

Aden was wearing a black tuxedo, the tie and cummerbund had the same ice-blue color as Charlie and Joey's dresses. He had a small corsage, matching her bridal bouquet. His blond hair was messy, like it always used to be and his blue eyes were glittering. He watched her approach with a big grin on his face.

Aden watched four people walking towards him, first Ruby and Charlie, followed by Joey and Jordan. Jordan had a little suit on, matching his own and carried a small, velvet pillow with two rings. They had been smart enough to fasten the rings with clips, the sand made it difficult for Jordan to walk. Joey had his hand in a firm grip, but he still stumbled as he toddled towards him.

He could hear little 'aws' and 'how cute' from the crowd. He grinned, he couldn't wait to have a little Beanie on his own.

He focused on Ruby, his wife to be. She looked like a revelation walking towards him. She was perfect, her hair was beautiful put up, but at the same time unruly enough to be her. The dress clung to her and she out-conquered her sister many fold, at least in his eyes. The sun made the pearls in the dress glitter, making her look ethereal.

He took a few steps towards her and offered her his arm. Ruby turned to Charlie and kissed her on the cheek before she let go of her arm and took Aden's instead. Charlie stood on Ruby's side and Joey stepped up on Aden's side with Jordan by her side. Bride and groom turned to face the vicar.

Charlie looked at Joey as the vicar spoke, she looked gorgeous. Her long dark hair was hanging loose down her back, shining in the sun. The color of the dress was perfect to her skin tone, but she noticed that it was a little loose. She quickly pushed the thought aside, she focused on her face instead. Nicole had done her makeup and she looked amazing, Joey caught her eyes and smiled at her. Charlie mouthed 'I love you' to her, Joey grinned and mouthed the same back.

Charlie saw Jordan losing his balance and fall on his butt in the sand. She could see that he was thinking about crying, Joey quickly bent down and picked him up. Charlie saw that she closed her eyes and frowned as she lifted him, she wanted to rush over and take him, but Joey already had him on her hip. She looked at her and grinned again. Jordan saw her and did the same. She felt her heart melt at the sight, she was the luckiest woman alive.

* * *

Ruby and Aden was dancing in the Surfclub, it didn't look like the ordinary club though, Leah, Martha and Nicole had taken on the task of transforming the club into a suitable place for a wedding reception. The pool table was gone and the whole floor was available for dancing, a local band was playing.

"It's so good to have a Mr. Buckton, I didn't know if you really meant it when you said you wanted my name, it's kind of untraditional." Ruby looked into the face of her husband.

"I know, but I don't care about tradition. I keep Jefferies as a middle name, but your family is more of a family to me than my own, I want to be a Buckton!" He smiled and kissed her. "How does it feel to be Mrs. Buckton?"

"Like we're three of a kind!" Ruby giggled, she liked being Mrs. Buckton. "It might cause problems if anybody calls out for Mrs. Buckton, and three women answers!"

"I'm so happy Rubs, you're mine! I'm really glad we didn't wait longer, this has been the perfect day. I look forward to our first night in a finished house, just being alone with you. I'm glad we're going to stay with Charlie and Joey though, they'll need us, but the house will wait for us, and we can hide there from time to time!" Aden gave her a cheeky grin.

"I love you Aden, and when all this is over, we'll have the honeymoon we deserve, move into our own house and have a little Beanie on our own. I can't wait to have a little you running around, and I'll hide with you anytime!"

---

"Do you want to dance?" Nicole took a hold of Tara's hand.

"Are you sure, no one knows about us except…"

"I know, I don't care, it's Summer Bay, people need a little shock now and then, for some it's the reason to live." Nicole grinned and tilted her head towards Colleen.

"The two of them can, why can't we?" Nicole looked at Charlie and Joey slow dancing.

"Ok, let's dance and give people something to talk about!" Tara rose and pulled Nicole up. They put their arms around each other and kissed. They both heard a gasp behind them, they pulled apart and turned to look. Colleen was standing there, looking like she was catching flies.

Nicole grinned at her. "Yes Colleen, Tara is my girlfriend, and we're about to share a dance and a few more kisses. If you want to call someone to tell, feel free to use my phone!" Tara pointed to her phone lying on the table. Both of them giggled and left a shocked Colleen.

---

"Your little sister is married, isn't that amazing?" Joey tilted her head and looked at Charlie, they were wrapped around each other, moving slowly to the music.

"It is, she has grown so quickly, it seems like yesterday she was the girl with the pigtails. Now she is a gorgeous, grown woman." Charlie looked at her sister and her husband dancing.

"It's just as amazing to see Aden married, I'm so happy he's part of the family for real." Joey joined Charlie in looking at them.

She turned her focus back on Charlie who did the same, they gazed into each other's eyes. "This has been such a wonderful day, I love you so much Mrs. Buckton!" Joey placed her lips on Charlie's, enjoying the feeling it gave her.

Charlie pulled back a little, "Who are you talking about, it's three of us now!"

"Guess…" Joey kissed her again. "Do you want to get out of here?" She lifted one of her eyebrows and grinned. Charlie smiled and kissed her back, "Guess…"


	55. Chapter 55

**thank you for all your suport on taking the story this way. means a lot to me!**

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"We are actually married!" Ruby lay with her head on Aden's chest. It was their first night together as husband and wife, they spent it in their own house.

"We are, and I couldn't be happier!" Aden stroke is hand up and down her back. "I love knowing that we belong to each other, that we have a whole life to look forward to, together." He stared up in the sealing. It had been a wonderful day, everyone had a good time, eating, drinking and dancing.

"We have…" Ruby lifted her head and looked him in the eyes. "Thank you for being so understanding, that you don't mind staying with Charlie and Joey."

"I want to be there too, they are my family and Joey is my best friend." Aden looked at her, "Beside, we'll have this place to ourselves whenever we want to!" He grinned and kissed her. "I really love you Rubs, you are the best thing that has ever happened to me!"

"I love you too, I think you may have noticed, since I married you today!" Ruby kissed him back and put her head down on his chest again. She couldn't help but think about her sister and Joey. They all had a fabulous day, with all their friends, good food and drinks, speeches and jokes. Charlie and Joey had a good time too, she could tell, and she was happy for them.

Joey hadn't been sick at all from the chemo, just some minor discomforts. The last two weeks, life had been almost back to normal, Ruby sincerely wished that it would stay that way. The surgery had been successful, the prognosis was good and the treatment went easy. Maybe this wouldn't be so hard after all.

She smiled as she took a deep breath, she was happy. She lifted her head and looked at Aden again, she gave him a cheeky grin, "Have you rested enough?" She kissed his chin and let her hand find its way down his body.

* * *

Ruby was pacing up and down the living room floor, holding Rebecha in her arms. Three days ago she had married the man she loved, she had been happy and thinking that life would go smoothly from there. Joey had reacted so well to her treatment and it seemed like easy sailing. Yesterday they had all gathered for Sunday lunch on the beach.

They had ordered food from the Diner, it was only the family with partners. They had spent hours eating, talking and laughing, it had been good. Charlie and Joey had been the embodiment of love and romance, touching, kissing, teasing, feeding each other. They had excused themselves after a while, left Jordan and Rebecha with them and headed for the house.

They had appeared a couple of hours later, both with the goofiest look on their face and suggested to head for the Diner to get some coffee. They all agreed, picked up Rachel and Martha on the way and continued their afternoon in delightful company. Irene and Colleen had been working, both of them fussing over them, making sure they had everything they needed.

Ruby had been elated. Married to Aden, Charlie and Joey being so happy, Tara and Nicole really seemed to be great together, Joey doing so well. She thought this would be easy. Yes, Joey had cancer, but reacting to the chemo as she did, it would be easy sailing.

Ruby wished she could eat her words.

It was Tuesday, time for a new round of chemo. They had left for the hospital in the morning. They had dropped Jordan of at Leah's and Rebecha was with her. Charlie and Joey had been home for about two hours before Joey had run into the bathroom with Charlie after. They had been in there for more than an hour and Ruby could hear sounds of hurling and crying.

She hurt for Joey, she was so fine this morning, and just a few hours later she was trying to get rid of her inside. Ruby felt tears running down her face. It had only been three days since she married Aden, three days with happiness and joy before the cancer came and rose it's ugly face. The two weeks after Joey's first round had been so easy, it had lured her into thinking that this would be easy sailing, obviously she was wrong.

She looked down on the bundle she had in her arms, she was so beautiful, she looked more like Charlie and herself for each day, she didn't have blue eyes though, her eyes was golden brown. She headed over to the bedroom to put Rebecha down. Ruby was tired and all she wanted was to curl up with Aden.

* * *

Charlie held Joey around her waist, It seemed like the drugs wanted to get her double back for not reacting on the first round. They were sitting on the bathroom floor and Joey had been throwing up, but now she was dry heaving. She leaned over the toilet bowl again and retched. Charlie took a better hold of her hair to prevent it from getting into the toilet.

She had been given some antiemetics, but they didn't seem to work. They had just been home for a couple of hours before Joey had started to vomit, and now she was hunched over, retching like her inside wanted to come up.

Charlie hurt for her, she wanted to ease her pain, but there was nothing she could do but hold her. Joey finally stopped retching and leaned her forehead on the cold porcelain. She leaned into her and put her chin on her shoulder, put her arm that was resting on her waist all the way across her stomach, pulling her close to herself. Joey lifted her head and leaned into her. "I'll take morning sickness any day instead of this!" Her voice barely more than a whisper.

"I'm sorry Joey, I would take this for you in a heartbeat if I could." Charlie gently rocked her fighting with her tears. She felt the muscles in Joey's stomach contract and she leaned over the toilet again. Charlie was still holding on to her hair, but she moved so quickly that she tore it away from her grip.

Charlie looked at her blankly, not understanding how Joey's hair could be hanging down her back when she still felt it in her hand. She looked down at her hand, her fist was full of long, dark strains of hair. She felt a scream build up inside, she swallowed and swallowed to stop it from making its way out.

Rachel had told them this would happened, but to actually see it… Joey didn't looked sick, losing her hair would make the cancer so real. She let out a whimper, the suppressed feelings from the past two weeks overwhelmed her. The cancer had been a non-topic, but it had still been there, lurching in the shadows.

Charlie started to cry, Joey turned and looked at her, her head throbbing from retching so much. She looked at the tears streaming down her face and then she noticed the fist full of hair. She looked from the hand to her face. Charlie just stared at her, unable to do anything.

Joey lifted her hands and ran them through her hair, they came out covered in hair. She held them up in front of her, staring. "No…no, this isn't happening…" She felt more spasms run through her body, she dry heaved again.

Joey tried to stop the retching, it hurt, but she had no chance of controlling it. It felt like her head was about to explode from the pressure it created. She groaned as her muscles contracted, twisting her very empty stomach. The urge to hurl subsided and she leaned her head on the cold porcelain again, it felt good, she was hot and sweaty.

She rose her head and turned to look at Charlie, sitting at her side, a little behind her. She was looking at her, sobbing quietly, she still clutched on to the hair. It reminded Joey about her own hands full of hair. She lifted her hands and shook the hair of before she let them tunnel through her hair again. They came out full this time too. She was filled with hopelessness, she knew this would come, but to actually see it… She looked at Charlie again, seeing the sorrow and the pain in her eyes, she felt like she could just give up.

She rose on her knees and opened a drawer in the vanity and searched, She sat down again, reaching a pair of scissors to Charlie.

Charlie looked at her, "Joey, I can't…"

"Charlie please, I can't take this, it's falling out, please cut it off!" Joey had tears streaming down her face.

"Joey, I can't do that to you… I…" Charlie's vision was blurred from tears welling up in her eyes.

Joey looked at her, the hand with the scissors shaking. She dropped them to the floor as new spasms made her dry heave. Charlie was frozen to the spot, she looked at the scissors lying on the floor, cutting of Joey's hair would make it so final. She looked at Joey retching, she realized that cutting her hair wouldn't make a difference, she was sick and it was no use in pretending anything else.

She picked up the scissors, turning it around in her hands. If Joey wanted her to do it, she would. Joey lifted her head from the toilet again, heaving for air. She saw Charlie sitting with the scissors in her hands.

"Are you sure?" Charlie whispered. Joey nodded, "I want you to do it." Charlie rose on her knees and grabbed a hold of some hair. With shaking hands she placed the blade of the scissor as close to the scalp as she could. She closed her eyes and cut. The feeling of the blades cutting the hair was like feeling it cut into her heart. She sobbed as she took another piece of hair and continued. She cut until she had filled the sink with dark hair.

She looked at what she had done, she had cut uneven, it looked more like what a five year old would do than an adult. She put down the scissors and started to run her fingers over her scalp, more and more hair came out.

"I need to shave the rest off, you look awful." Charlie couldn't help but smile a little, she looked kind of funny. Joey rose to her knees and looked in the mirror, she turned to Charlie with a sorrow-filled smile, "Yeah, you need to take the rest."

"Let me just get something to put this in," Charlie motioned to the hair in the sink. Joey nodded, she started to dry heave again.

Charlie walked into the kitchen to get a bag, Ruby was standing with the back to her, but turned when she heard her coming into the room.

"How's she doing?" Ruby didn't like the look in her sisters face, it made her nervous. Charlie stepped up to her and embraced her, crying. Ruby held her tight, trying to comfort her.

"I cut of her hair." Charlie could hardly get the words out. "I held her hair to stop it from getting in to the toilet. I pulled out a fist full…"

"Oh God, I'm so sorry."Ruby felt tears running down her own cheeks. Charlie let go of Ruby and wiped her tears away. "I need to get something to put the hair in… I have to shave the rest…" Ruby quickly opened a drawer and handed her a plastic bag. "Do you need help?" Charlie shook her head and left her.

* * *

Two hours later and Joey was still retching. Charlie had helped her to get into bed, there was nothing coming up anyway so there was no point in staying in the bathroom. Joey was exhausted and in pain. She was lying on her side and Charlie was sitting beside her. She was worried, even drinking water made her throw up again. She took the washcloth lying on the bedside table and wiped Joey's face and head, she was dripping from sweat. She rose to wring it up in cold water again, and she needed to feed Rebecha.

"Ruby, can you sit with Joey for a while? I need to feed Rebecha, and I have to call Rachel to get her to come, Joey can't keep retching like this." Charlie walked over to her sister sitting on the couch, holding a fussing Rebecha.

"Of course I can, how is she doing?" Ruby handed Rebecha over and grabbed the cloth from Charlie.

"Honestly, not good. I have never seen anyone throw up like that, and I thought I had seen the worst when she suffered the morning sickness with Jordan." Charlie sat down and put Rebecha to her breast, and picked up the phone to call.

Ruby eased open the door to the bedroom, her eyes fell on Joey and her bald head, she hadn't seen her since Charlie cut her hair off. The sight was heartbreaking, Joey had the signature of a cancer patient. She walked over and sat beside her, "How are you feeling?" It was a stupid question, but she didn't know what else to say.

Joey turned a little and looked at her, "Like I have cancer." She gave her a little mile.

"You know, you don't look half bad without hair, does it feel strange?" Ruby lifted her hand and wiped away tears escaping her eyes.

"It does, it feels like my skin has shrunk, it's really tight. The good thing is that it cools me off a little, I'm sweating like a pig." Joey tried to joke, but new cramps made her body jerk and twist. Ruby looked at her helplessly, she could see how painful it was, all she could do was to pray for Rachel to come quickly with some drug that would work.

* * *

Rachel closed the door to the bedroom behind her, she looked at Charlie and Ruby sitting on the couch waiting for her. She walked over and sat down in the chair opposite them. "Next time, don't wait so long before you call me. Like I said, I'm here for you day and night."

"Thanks Rachel, how is she doing?" Charlie hadn't been in with her, Rachel had came while she nursed Rebecha, and she needed to let her finish.

"She's sleeping, I had to try a couple of different drugs, but this one seems to work. I gave her some painkillers too, she really hurt after all that retching. I wouldn't be surprised if she sleeps until tomorrow." Rachel looked at Charlie, "How are you holding up?"

Charlie sighed and rubbed her face with her hands,"I'm tired, sad, angry… I cut off her hair today, it was awful…" She leaned her elbows on her knees and rested her head in her hands, some tears escaper her eyes. "I don't know if I can take this, Rachel, seeing her like this, she is really sick, isn't she?"

"She is, I know she didn't seem to be over the past few weeks, but this is reality. Charlie, all you can do is to be here for her." Rachel kneeled in front of her and put her arms around her. "You can do this, and you have people here for you, I'm here for you!"


	56. Chapter 56

"How are you feeling honey?" Charlie sat down beside Joey in bed with a glass of water in her hand. She had been sleeping for fourteen hours straight and had just woken.

"Much better, weak though, but at least I don't feel like throwing up." Joey shuffled to get into sitting position. Charlie put the glass down and arranged pillows behind her back to make her comfortable. She looked small and sick without her hair. Charlie placed her hand on her head.

"You're warm," Joey closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling of Charlie's hand. Charlie moved her thumb gently over her skin. "Are you cold?" She had a lump in her throat that made it hard to speak.

"No, not really, I don't think so. It's hard to tell. It just feels good…"

Charlie let her hand run from her head to her cheek, "Are you nauseous today?" Joey shook her head, opened her eyes and sat up straighter.

"Here, try some water, if you can't drink, I have to take you to the hospital to get some fluids into you." Charlie handed her the glass.

"Well, that's certainly a threat that will work, I can't help it, I just don't like the place." Joey grabbed the glass and grimaced at the lukewarm water. "Can't I at least get it cold?"

"Temperate is easier on your stomach, drink, and if you hold that we can venture with some crackers."Charlie gave her a crocked smile, and watched her empty the glass. She was nervous for the reaction. It seemed like it went down well, Charlie was revealed.

"Honey, I have been thinking about one thing," Charlie paused, looking at Joey. "We haven't told Lily or Brett, I think they should know…"

Joey closed her eyes and leaned back, "Charlie, I just can't see Lily right now, I feel so uneasy around her, I don't have the energy to face her."

"I can tell her, if you want me to." Charlie grabbed her hand. "I can talk to Brett too…"

"Would you do that? It's not fair on you though, I should do it."

"Joey, it's fine, you're right, you shouldn't use your energy on Lily, I can handle it, ok?"

"Ok, but only if you feel up for it." Joey pulled Charlie down until she rested on her shoulder. She held her arms around her, kissing her forehead.

"You know, it's really me that should be holding you."Charlie mumbled, it felt good to be held.

"I'm sure you'll get plenty of opportunities to do that, now it's my turn." She smiled when she felt Charlie's arm sneak around her middle, snuggling closer to her.

* * *

Lily was sitting in an armchair, flipping through a magazine without really seeing anything. She thought about the last month. Tara and Tom would contact her at least once a week, but she hadn't heard anything in nearly a month. She had debated with herself whether to call Joey to hear what was going on, but in the end decided that they would contact her when they were ready to. Besides, she was really busy in her new job at a nursing home in Yabbie creek.

She put the magazine down and headed for the kitchen to make herself some coffee, some days was just harder than others. This was one of those hard days, memories from the past would haunt her, guilt from leaving Joey and Brett, confusion about her daughters sexuality. She decided to put something stronger than milk in her coffee.

She sat down by the kitchen table, enjoying the feeling of warm alcohol running down her throat. She didn't drink much, but sometimes she did to ease the pain inside. She looked out the window, watching people pass by on the street below.

A car parked by the curb, Lily thought she recognized it, but she wasn't sure. She had no doubt who it was when the driver stepped out. She quickly emptied the rest of the cup, she felt like she really needed it, meeting Charlie wasn't her favorite thing.

She got up and checked herself in the mirror, waiting for Charlie to knock. It didn't take long before a sharp knock made her jump. She had waited for it, but it startled her anyway.

Charlie was standing outside the door with Rebecha in her arms, she had decided to take her with. She took a deep breath, she didn't look forward to this, who knew how Lily would take the news. She closed her eyes for a moment, she dug up her 'cop-mode', that would make it easier to handle this. She opened her eyes when she heard the key turn and the door open.

"Charlie, this is a surprise, and Rebecha, she is getting big!" Lily did her best to be cheerful, hiding her nerves.

"Lily, can I come in?" Charlie saw straight through Lily's facade. Lily stepped aside and let her enter.

"Do you want a coffee or something?" Lily wrung her hands, Charlie looked stern and focused, it made her nerves even worse.

"Water would be nice," Charlie gave her a little smile, "Maybe we could sit down…?"

Lily nodded and motioned for the couch, "Sit, and I get you that water." She left and went to the kitchen, she found the bottle of whiskey and took a large swig, Charlie really got to her nerves, she wondered what she was doing here.

"Beautiful weather, isn't it?" Lily joined Charlie in the living room, she had no idea of what to say to her.

"Look… Lily, this isn't a social call." Charlie took a deep breath, she understood what Joey meant by not being able to relax around Lily.

"Oh… why… I don't see you often, it's mostly Joey and the kids…"

"That's why I'm here," Charlie shifted Rebecha, reached out a hand and took a hold of Lily's. No matter what, Lily was Joey's mother, and this wouldn't be easy to hear.

Lily looked from Charlie's hand to her face. "Charlie, you're scaring me… is something wrong, has something happened?"

Charlie bit her lower lip and took a deep breath, "Yes, something is wrong… We probably should have told you before, but honestly, none of us felt like it. You're not our closest friends or family, even if you're Joey's mother. We have spent our time with those who matters the most to us. I hope you can understand that."

"I know, it's my fault, but please, I have a bad feeling, can you tell me what's going on?"

"There is no easy way to say this…I wish I could break it to you gently, but I can't… "Charlie was surprised that she had compassion with her. "Lily… Joey has cancer."

Lily looked at her, regretting the alcohol she had drunk, it made it difficult to concentrate. "What?"

"I'm sorry, we found out about a month ago…"

"A month… and you didn't tell me?"

"Lily, we didn't have the capacity to deal with you too, you haven't exactly made life easy for us."

"But… I'm her mother, I have a right to know!"

Something in her tone pushed the wrong buttons in Charlie, "Right? You have a right to know?"

"I'm her mother…" Lily deflated

"You're her mother, I guess you had right to know that she was abused by her father, hit by her brother and raped by his friend? You have no right to know, you gave up that right when you left her!" Charlie battled to keep her voice low and calm, she didn't want to upset Rebecha.

"I… sorry… Can you say anything more, what type, how is she doing?" Lily wiped away some tears. Charlie calmed down, "She hasn't been herself for a few months, we went to see a doctor, she has ovarian cancer. She had surgery to remove the tumors and she has started chemo."

"Oh God…" Lily put a hand to her mouth. "How is she reacting to the chemo?"

"She didn't react at all to the first round, at least not that we could see. She had he second round yesterday, it made her really sick… She started to lose her hair too, we cut it off…"

"This is her punishment…" Lily whispered.

"What did you say?" Charlie glared at her, hoping she had heard wrong.

"No, nothing, I… I… it was stupid, I didn't mean it. It was my old way of thinking. I'm really sorry, I really didn't mean it!" Lily had tears running down her face. "Charlie please, I had a little to drink before you came, please, I really didn't mean it."

Charlie rose from the couch, laying Rebecha down where she had been seated. She placed her hands on her hips, this was one of the things Joey had been scared of. "If you say that she deserves this, I'm going to hit you so hard that you won't even remember your own name, believe me, I will." She could hardly control her anger.

"Charlie, no, I don't know, she doesn't. I… The truth is that just a few months ago I would think that… I don't know, all right, I just don't know!"

Charlie looked at the woman sitting on the chair, she looked old and broken. She took a deep breath, turned and picked up Rebecha. She didn't have anything more to say.

"Can I… Can I come and see her?" Lily whispered.

Charlie looked at her. "No, I don't want you in my house. You don't know… But you can think it… Those kind of thoughts are still in you… Joey has enough to deal with and so have I." Charlie felt tears running down her face. "I don't think you know how much it hurt me to hear you say those words… I don't want to see you again." She turned and headed for the door.

"Charlie, tell her that I love her…" Lily rose behind her, "I never meant to hurt her, or you…"

Charlie looked down on Rebecha in her arms and then at Lily. "I have my little daughter here… I would die for her…" She opened the door and left.

* * *

Charlie leaned her head on the headrest. She had just left Lily and sat outside in her car. She sobbed, she couldn't believe what Lily had said. She felt like her heart was ripped out. Maybe Lily consciously didn't think like that, but subconsciously she did.

No matter which it was, to hear those words devastated her. She tried to recompose herself, she had to call Brett before Lily did. She didn't want him to hear it second hand.

She picked up her phone and called. A bright, happy voice answered, just the sound of it made her little self-control shatter. "Annie?" She took a deep breath, trying to keep her voice steady.

"Yes, it's Charlie, right?"

"Yeah… look, is Brett there?"

"He is, do you want to talk to him?"

"I want to talk to both of you, can you put the phone on loudspeaker or something?" Charlie rubbed her forehead.

"Just a second, I get Brett to pick up the other phone."

Charlie leaned her arm on the window frame, supporting her head with her hand.

"Hi Charlie, nice to hear from you, how are you all doing?" Brett's deep voice came on the line.

"It's about that…" Charlie couldn't hold back a little whimper.

"Charlie, what's going on?" Annie's soft voice made her sob.

"I'm sorry… I wish I could tell you this face to face…"She managed to get the words out in between sobs , she wiped away tears running down her face.

"Charlie, spill, it's not helping to hear you cry." Brett had a warm tone in his voice, something she hadn't heard before.

She took a deep, shaky breath, "Brett, Annie… it's Joey… she has cancer." The other side went dead silent.

"Are you there?" Charlie wondered if they had hung up on her.

"Charlie, we'll be right there." The phone went dead, this time they had hung up.


	57. Chapter 57

Rachel was holding on to Charlie crying her eyes out in her arms. She had called about an hour earlier and came around twenty minutes later, but Rachel still didn't know what this was about. Tony had taken the kids out to give them time to themselves, Rebecha was sleeping in her car seat.

Rachel stroke Charlie over her hair, waiting for her to calm down. Finally Charlie lifted her head, and saw Rachel's shoulder wet from her tears. "I'm sorry Rachel… I just didn't know what to do, where to go… You're all wet."

Rachel looked at her shoulder, she really was wet, half an hour of crying had soaked her shoulder. "Just give me a second to change, do you want coffee, tea?"

"I don't know, whatever you're having." Charlie's head was aching, she sighed, finally she felt like her well of tears had dried up.

Rachel came back dressed in a new top and holding two cups. "Coffee" She sat down beside her. "What's going on?" She took a sip and looked at her. "Is it Joey?"

Charlie shook her head, "no, she was fine this morning, or fine considering the circumstances, she isn't nauseous, she drank, had a few crackers, she felt weak, but other than that…" Charlie lifted her cup and drank some.

"I went to tell Lily," She put her arm on the back of the couch, resting her head in her hand. "She said that Joey deserved this, that it was her punishment…"

Rachel looked at her in shock, "No, you got to be kidding!"

Charlie shook her head, "What am I supposed to do? I can't tell Joey this, it would devastate her. I'm devastated by it, what would it do to her? I told her that she is not welcome over. How am I supposed to explain that to Joey?"

Rachel was still staring at her, trying to get her head around what Charlie told her. This was beyond her comprehension. "She said that?"

"She did, she said afterwards that she didn't mean it, and then that she didn't know. Maybe she is trying to change her ways, but she is not doing a very good job, it's so embedded in her… I won't take the risk of her saying something like that to Joey."

"You know I started here as a psychiatrist, that woman is sick. Maybe I should have a talk with her…" Rachel chewed her lips, "Charlie, I think maybe the best thing is to tell Joey the truth. She'll notice that you're hiding something, and if she finds out that you are lying to her…"

"How do you suggest I tell her that her mother thinks she deserves this? Rachel… How?" Charlie had started out almost screaming but ended in a whisper.

"I don't know Charlie, but if she finds out later, it's going to be so much worse. At least you find comfort in each other… I can come with you?"

"You really are a good friend Rachel, we owe you so much. Can you come, and maybe take some sedatives with you… for me." Charlie gave her a crocket smile, she knew that Rachel was right, but that didn't mean she looked forward to tell Joey.

* * *

Ruby was sitting on the porch, enjoying the peace and quiet. Charlie had taken Rebecha, Jordan was at Stella's. Joey had been up, eaten and gone back to bed again for a nap. The vomiting yesterday had taken its toll on her.

Ruby leaned her head against the wall and lifted her coffee to her lips. It felt good sitting, relaxing, enjoying a good cup of coffee, this was great, she smiled to herself.

"Ruby, Hi!" Leah's voice made her sit up.

"Hi, nice to see you!"

"I just thought I should pop by, VJ and Tom are out surfing, and I have the day off." Leah came up the stairs and sat down beside her.

"It's always nice to have you here." Ruby paused, it wasn't nice to greet her like this, but she had to tell in case Joey woke up. "Leah, you need to know one thing." Ruby bit her lower lip.

"What? Something with Joey? She seemed to do so well Sunday." Leah had the worried crease between her eyebrows.

"She had a new round of chemo yesterday, she reacted badly, she got really sick, but that's not it. She started to lose her hair yesterday. Apparently it's common to lose the hair after two to four weeks… Charlie cut it off, she lost so much at once… She doesn't have any hair."

"God… how's she doing?"

"I don't think she has had energy to deal with it yet, she is so tired… Do you want a coffee?"

Leah nodded, hearing that Joey had lost her hair wasn't a surprise, she knew it would happen sooner rather than later.

"Hi, nice to see you Leah," Joey came walking out on the porch, carrying two cups and placed both of them on the railing. Leah got up and gave her a hug. "So this is what you look like without hair?" Leah lifted her hand and rubbed her over the head. "I have to say, you look kind of cool, you can actually carry off that look!"

Joey grinned at her, "Well, I don't know, at least I'm grateful that my scull is even. No bumps and stuff like that, and my shampoo bill is going way down." Joey let her hand stroke her head, it didn't feel so bad. It had been traumatic to cut it off, but now that it was gone it was ok.

Ruby came and joined them, Leah and Ruby had coffee while Joey had a cup of chamomile tea. She didn't care for it, but coffee would be too strong and the stuff would be good for her, at least that's what Martha had told her. If she should go by the taste, she was in doubt.

It was nice just sitting outside, enjoying the weather, having a good time, talking about everything and nothing.

* * *

Charlie pulled up and stopped the car in front of their home, she saw the three women sitting on the porch, obviously having a good time. "Rachel… Maybe I should wait, they are enjoying themselves…"

Rachel reached out her hand and placed it on top of Charlie's on the wheel. "It's better to jump in it, than crawl. If you postpone, it's only getting more difficult." Charlie glanced at her, looked back at the three on the porch and nodded. "Here it goes…"

Charlie and Rachel got out of the car, picked up Rebecha and made their way up to the three on the porch. Ruby got up and took Rebecha. Charlie went over to Joey, pulled her up and placed herself in the chair and pulled Joey down on her lap, so she was sitting sideways.

Joey looked at her, it wasn't difficult to see that she had been crying. She gave her a kiss, "What happened?"

Charlie leaned her head back and rested it against the wall. "I saw Lily, and I called Brett, Brett and Annie are on their way here."

"That's nice, it's a long time since we saw them last." Joey caught Charlie's eyes, that was not the reason she was upset. "There's something else…"

Charlie met her gaze and nodded. "I didn't know what to do, I talked to Rachel, that's why I'm, so late… "

"You want us to leave?" The question came from Leah.

"No, I think you need to know this too, but I think we should leave Tom and Tara out of it." Charlie looked at Rachel who nodded.

"I went to see Lily, I told her about Joey… first she reacted like you would expect… She said something… " Charlie didn't want to tell, the words still hurt.

"What did she say?" Leah leaned forward, she had never been convinced that Lily had changed and she could only imagine what she had said this time.

Charlie felt tears escaping her eyes and she wiped them away. She took a better hold of Joey, "I told her that she couldn't come here. She said something, she said she didn't mean it, but just saying out loud, thinking like that… she said that… that Joey deserved this." The last words was barely audible.

Joey felt her bottom lip starting to shiver. "What? She thinks I… You must have misunderstood…"

Charlie shook her head, "I'm sorry baby, I didn't want to tell you…" Joey stared at her. "My mother thinks that I deserve this?"

"She apologized afterwards, but then admitted that she didn't knew, I'm so sorry." Charlie looked at Joey's shocked face.

"I can't believe it… actually… I can…" Joey sighed, it would fit together with everything else Lily had said. That didn't make it hurt less.

"She asked me to tell you that she loves you, and never meant to hurt you."

"Ha" Joey snorted, "funny way of showing it!" She put a hand on Charlie's cheek, "I'm so sorry you had to hear that, I hope you hit her or something."

Charlie gave her a crocket smile, "no, but I threatened to." Joey smiled and kissed her. "Charlie, let's just forget it, let's focus on us, our real family and friends." Charlie nodded, she was right, there were more important things than Lily.

* * *

Leah was walking down the beach, she had excused herself soon after Charlie had came home. Hearing what Lily had said made her furious. Joey was like a daughter to her, she had been since the first time she lived at her place.

She had never liked Lily, Joey was a wonderful person and Lily didn't deserve her. When they had told her about Lily's little 'I'm sorry' speech, she hadn't believed a word.

"Leah!" Leah turned when she heard Rachel call, she came jogging down the beach to catch up with her.

"Rachel, you didn't have to."

"I know, I wanted to, how are you doing?" Rachel knew how Leah was feeling about Lily, and she had been more upset than Joey was when Charlie told them.

Leah stopped walking, "I'm so mad right now, how can anybody think like that? Joey is the sweetest, loveliest, most caring person I know." She angrily wiped away a tear. "I can handle seeing her sick, without hair, pale and thin. What I can't handle is anybody thinking like that about her!"

"Leah, I think the best thing to do is what Joey said, focus on what's important, that's being here for her. You know she sees you as more of a mother than Lily, she needs you now, be what she sees you like!" Rachel put an arm around her shoulders and they walked slowly towards Leah's

* * *

Nicole was driving Tara home from her place. Tara had come home with her Sunday after they had left the Diner, and spent the last few days with her. She seriously considered moving to Summer Bay, she wanted to be close to Tara and Tara wanted to be with her, but she also wanted to be with her sister. Nicole wanted to make it easy for her.

"Tara…"

Tara turned in the seat and looked at her. "Yeah?"

"I just thought I should tell you that I have accepted a permanent position at work, and I want to move to the Bay." Nicole kept her eyes on the road, but glanced over at Tara.

"Serious? You're moving here?"

"Serious, I want to be with you, I love you!"

"I love you too!" Tara leaned over and kissed her neck. "You are really going to stay?"

"I'm going to stay!" She pulled the car over and stopped. "I want to be with you." She loosened her seat belt and leaned over and found her lips. "I want to be with you too!" Tara answered the kiss and placed her hand on her thigh, sliding it up under her skirt. "Now..."


	58. Chapter 58

Lily walked towards Charlie and Joey's place. She didn't know what to do, she was confused, depressed and hurt. She heard laughter from the beach, she recognized Tom and Tara's voices. She sneaked closer, feeling like a little kid as she hid behind a three.

She saw a group of people sitting under parasols on blankets, talking and laughing. She saw Jordan, Jonathan and another little boy digging in the sand, Tom and a boy she assumed had to be VJ was playing in the surfs. Tara was sitting in the arms of a blond woman she had never seen. Brett and Annie were there, Charlie's sister was lying with her head in her husband's lap. She recognized Leah sitting next to some man, she almost sighed from relief, at least some of them were normal.

There were two other couples she didn't know and Charlie and Joey. Joey was sitting between Charlie's legs, leaning her back against her. They were obviously having a good time. She lifted her hand and wiped away some tears, turned and left.

She hated the fact that Charlie had banned her from coming over. After all, she was Joey's mother, and Charlie had no right to do that. She was confused, she had voices in her head screaming at her. She tried to get control but failed, she got into her car and leaned her head on the wheel. Maybe it was what Joey deserved, maybe she had been wrong listening to the pastor and starting to accept her daughters. Voices screamed at her inside. She started the car and headed home. One voice was louder than all the others: 'this is your fault'.

* * *

Joey enjoyed the feeling of Charlie's body against her back, her arms around her middle and her head resting on top of her own. She was happy. She looked at the kids playing on the beach, Rebecha in Leah's arms. They would all get together like this at least twice a month, having a picnic on the beach right down from their house.

Brett, Annie and Jo had come two months ago. After Charlie had called them, they jumped in the car, taken leave from work, driven to the Bay and never returned home. They were staying in Ruby and Aden's house. It was great having them there. Brett had developed into a warm and caring man, and Annie was the same as always, full of insight, warm and loving.

Brett had gotten a short term job in a garage while Annie was staying at home, helping Charlie and her with the kids. It wouldn't long until school started up again after the summer and Ruby was going to teach. That would make it impossible for her to help out as much as she had been. Ruby and Aden was still staying with them though, Ruby had no intention of leaving them alone. Brett and Annie were there, but Ruby and Aden was the two people closest to them.

Joey had been on chemo for three months, and she felt it. She was tired and slept a lot, her muscles and joints ached and she could hardly eat. This was one of the good days, surrounded by friends and family, the kids playing, she was happy. She moved a little sideways in order to see Charlie's face. Charlie looked down at her and smiled.

"I love you," Joey whispered and lifted her hand and placed it on Charlie's cheek.

"I love you too," Charlie lowered her head and kissed her.

* * *

Nicole and Tara had left the others and were walking along the water's edge. Nicole had her arm around Tara's shoulders. She saw that today had been difficult for her. She had moved to the bay six weeks ago, and most of the time they would be at her place. It seemed to her that Tara avoided to go home, and seeing her today, she decided it was time to talk.

"Tara, why don't you want to go home anymore?" Her voice was soft and calm.

Tara stopped and looked at her before she continued walking.

"You love your sister and Charlie, don't you think it would be good to spend time with them?"

"I suppose so… it's just… " Tara stopped, turned and looked at her. "I don't know what to say or how to act." She lowered her head and studied the sand. "She is sick, and I don't know how to handle this. What… What if she dies?"

Nicole put her hands on her shoulders, "Tara, she is not going to die!"

"How do you know that? She is so sick, didn't you see her today? She is barely more than skin and bones, she has that look in her face. I have been there when she can't get out of bed…" Tara had tears in her eyes. "I don't want to see her like that. I want my strong, funny, boat-loving sister back!"

She leaned into her and cried. Nicole held her and let her. "You know, you should talk to them… You're right, I don't know if she'll make it or not, but you should use the time to be with her. If she doesn't make it you'll regret for the rest of your life that you didn't use the time you had. Tell them that you find it difficult, that you don't know what to do, what to say and how to act. They'll understand."

Tara lifted her head, "Are you sure? Maybe it'll hurt them or something…"

"Tara, it hurts more if you avoid them. Joey is your sister, she wants to spend time with you too!" She put a hand under Tara's chin and gave her a gentle kiss. "I'm here for you if you need to talk or cry or laugh or kiss or…"

Tara smiled as their lips met again. "I'm really glad I got you!"

* * *

Rachel was standing by the reception and flipped through the files on the new patients that had been admitted during the weekend. She stopped when she saw the name Lily Harris. "Hey, do you know if this is Joey's mother?" She turned to the nurse sitting at the desk, working on the computer.

"Lily Harris? I don't know, but she sure looks like Joey." The nurse barely looked up from the screen.

Rachel read the file, alcohol, pills, possible suicide attempt. She closed the file and bit her lip. It was more than two months since Charlie had cried her eyes out over what she had said. She walked down the hall, heading for her room.

Rachel pushed the door open and stopped just inside the door. Lily turned and looked at her, "Who are you?"

"Doctor Armstrong, I had the weekend off.." she made her way over to her.

"You are a friend of Joey, aren't you?"

"Eh, yeah… " Rachel was a little bewildered, she had never seen Lily before.

"I saw you down on the beach a couple of weeks ago, with Joey and Charlie and a lot of other people."Lily couldn't hide the resentment in her voice.

"What? We didn't see you…" Rachel frowned,

"No, Charlie banned me from coming."

"And you think that is strange?"

Lily didn't answer, she turned her face away from Rachel. She did think it was strange, she was Joey's mother and she wanted to see her. She had said some things that wasn't nice, but Charlie should have see that she didn't mean it, or did she?

"Look, I have seen you're file. Was this a serious attempt, or just a call for help?" Rachel already knew the answer, she just wanted to hear what Lily would say.

Lily didn't answer this time either, she pressed her hands to her eyes.

"Is this about Joey?"

Lily put her hands down and looked at her. "How's she doing?"

"She's fighting."

"It's her punishment… Can you tell her I'm here?" She whispered the first part, she felt like her head was about to explode.

Rachel glared at her. "If you think that I'm going to tell a very sick woman that her mother, who just announced that her daughter deserves to have cancer, tried to kill herself and really would like to see her, then you really are deluded.

Lily threw her head back and put her hands to her ears. "Please, make them stop!"

"Make who stop?"

"All the voices in my head, I don't know who to listen to any more. Some says it's what she deserves, other says it isn't and yet others says she's going to die no matter what and it's all my fault. I can't take it anymore! Please tell Joey, I need to see her."

"And what are you going to tell her. That you hope she dies?" Rachel was boiling with anger, She had no problem understanding why Leah disliked the woman so much. "You are clearly suffering some kind of a break down. I'm going to arrange for you to go to a place where you have psychiatrists to talk to, people to look after you, There's a beautiful retreat down the coast, I'm going to call and have you sent there."

"Rachel, please, tell Joey about this, I want her to know… I wrote her a letter."

Rachel shook her head, "How selfish can you be, trying to kill yourself while your daughter is fighting death. I'm going to tell her that you came to us for help and that you received it. You didn't try to kill yourself, you're working in a nursing home, you have knowledge of drugs. You know you didn't take enough. You are going to stay alive until Joey is out of the woods, after that, I don't care what you do!" Rachel turned and left her.

"She is not going to make it!" Lily shouted after her. Rachel closed the door and leaned against the wall. She had behaved highly unprofessional, but hearing Lily talking like that made her furious. She didn't know if she really meant it or not. Neither way would she let Joey anywhere near that lady.

She walked into her office and started to make the arrangements for Lily.

* * *

Charlie was sitting on the couch with Joey between her legs, it was a comfortable position for both of them. Joey had Rebecha lying on her chest, cuddling the sleeping baby. She was a little more than five months now and had grown a lot.

Charlie looked down on them, she loved seeing Rebecha in Joey's arms. It wasn't often she had energy to be with the kids now a days. She was increasingly worried about Joey, she had been through three and a half cycle of chemo and she suffered. She could hardly eat and had lost a lot of weight, she was in pain and struggled to keep warm.

Charlie felt like almost every day was a question of having her admitted to the hospital or not. So far they hadn't, but only because of Joey's resentment of being there. Charlie knew that she had to force her if she didn't start to get some nutrients in her. She shrugged, put her arms around her and pulled her closer.

Ruby sat on the couch too, with Joey's legs in her lap, it was nice being close. They were watching a movie, but neither of them paid any attention, the movie had just become background noise.

Aden came walking in from the kitchen with his hands full of cups. "Coffee and tea for the ladies!" He grinned as he put the cups down on the table. "You want me to take Rebecha to bed?" He looked at Joey who nodded in response. Aden eased his hands around the little body and lifted her.

"He is going to be some Dad!" Joey said what they all had been thinking, seeing how gentle and loving he was with Rebecha, not only now, but always.

Aden came back in to the living room, Rebecha and Jordan was sharing bedroom, and both of them were sound asleep. He was about to sit down when someone knocked on the door, he rose and answered it.

"Rachel, nice to see you!" They greeted her when she came into the room. "Coffee Rachel?" Aden followed behind her, she nodded and grinned. She sat down in a chair facing the three on the couch.

"Here you are," Aden came back with a cup and gave to Rachel before he sat down in the other chair.

"I just thought I should tell you that Lily has been in the hospital."

"Is she all right?" Joey interrupted her. She couldn't help but feel a little concerned.

"She is fine physically, but she is struggling mentally. I have organized for her to go to a retreat down the coast, where she has people to talk to and that will take care of her."

"Good!" Charlie was relieved, knowing where she was made everything easier, one less thing to worry about. She had a little nagging fear that Lily would turn up on their doorstep and blurt out whatever she was thinking. Now she knew that she wouldn't.

Rachel smiled at them, leaned back and sipped her coffee, Lily would go the following morning and stay away for, hopefully, a very long time.


	59. Chapter 59

Charlie ran down the beach, it felt good to move, feeling the heart beat in her chest, the rhythmic motion of her feet. The sun was shining, a breeze gently blowing up some white on the top of the waves, It was a wonderful morning. The running and the sound of her heart pounding in her head drowned out all thoughts, it just felt good being alive.

She saw a figure stand up as she closed in on her home. She recognized Tara, she wondered what she was doing there, she hadn't seen her a lot around lately, she stayed at Nicole's most of the time. Charlie suspected that she had difficulty dealing with the situation. She stopped when she came up to her.

"Hi" Charlie leaned her hands on her knees and bent over to catch her breath.

"Hi," Tara bit her lower lip. "Can I talk with you… if you have time…"

"Sure, you want to come up to the house or just sit here?"

"Here's fine…" Tara sat down with Charlie next to her. She wasn't sure about what to say.

"So… How are you doing, we haven't seen you much lately…" Charlie tried to get her talking.

Tara sat with her knees under her chin and her arms wrapped around, she would always sit like that when she had something difficult to talk about. "Yeah, I'm sorry… It's just… I don't know how to handle this…" Tara glanced over at her.

"I know, I assumed that's why you're not here. I know this is difficult, but we miss you."Charlie put an arm around her, Tara leaned into her side.

"I'm sorry, I want to be here, I just don't know what to say or what to do. I feel stupid and it's easier to push this away and pretend it isn't happening."

"You know, Joey really loves you, I do too, and we want to have you here. She'll understand that it's hard for you, tell her!"

"It's just… I hate to see her like this, so fragile. She is skinnier every time I see her, she is just a shadow of who she used to be, and I want my old sister back." Tara had tears streaming down her face. "I miss her already and I don't know how to cope if she dies."

"She is not going to die, Tara, she'll fight this!" Charlie battled with her own tears.

"Fight this with what? There's hardly anything left of her."

Charlie swallowed, Tara was right, four and a half cycle with chemo, she had three rounds left, Charlie couldn't see how Joey would be able to take those three treatments. "She has her will."

* * *

Ruby knocked on the door to Charlie and Joey's bedroom, she opened and went inside. It was early, Charlie was out running and Joey hadn't got out of bed yet, if she would get out at all. Ruby walked around the bed and sat on the edge next to her.

"Hey," Joey whispered.

"How are you feeling?" Ruby put a hand on her head.

"Tired…"

"Do you want something to eat?"

"No, I can't stand the thought of food…" Joey turned over on her back and opened her eyes and looked at Ruby.

"You need to get something in you, you're only…" Ruby couldn't hide her concern, Joey was just skin and bones.

"I know, later ok?" She gave her a little smile. She reached for her hand, Ruby saw the movement and took hers in her own.

"Ruby… I need to say something," Joey looked her straight in the eyes. Ruby nodded.

"I want you to promise me that you will take care of Charlie for me, be there for her, help her…"

"Joey, you're not going to die!" Ruby interrupted her, tears was welling up in her eyes.

"Ruby, look at me!"

Ruby wiped away the tears and looked at her, really looked at her. Her eyes lay deep in her head, her skin had a sick color and she had large dark circles around her eyes. Her lips was dry and chapped, and she was skinny, incredible skinny. She looked sick, more than that, she looked deadly sick.

"Be here for her, alright?" Joey caught her eyes, Ruby nodded, she couldn't talk. "I don't know how this is going to end, I'm not about to give up yet, but I want to tell you this while I can." Ruby nodded again.

"I love you Ruby, I don't know what I have done to deserve you as my sister, but I'm eternally grateful that you are. You are a wonderful person, and I know you'll take care of Charlie for me. Help her with the kids and make sure she doesn't do anything stupid, ok?"

"Ok, but don't think that makes it ok for you to die, the only one Charlie needs is you. I don't know what she does if you're not around anymore… You have to fight this Joey, we'll fight with you!" Ruby climbed up in the bed and lay beside her, putting her arm under Joey's head. "I will always be here for both of you!"

Joey smiled and turned her head to face her, "Thank you Ruby, and I'm not ready to throw in the towel just yet!" She stared up in the sealing, her eyes slowly closed and she fell asleep. Ruby listened to the slow breathing sounds Joey made. Her heart was breaking over what Joey had asked her.

She knew that there was no way Charlie would cope without her. She remembered the three months they had been apart after Charlie had slept with Hugo, way back in the beginning of their relationship. The three months had been hell for her, she had done three things, work, drink and cry. Back then she knew that Joey would come back, that she would see her again and there was a hope burning.

That hope had been fulfilled, they got back together and now, almost eight years later she was at risk of losing her again. Ruby sighed, she would do everything to help them through this. Six more weeks, they could do it, Joey could do it, she had to.

* * *

Ruby woke by someone opening the door, "Hey, sorry to wake you, I didn't know you where in here." Charlie whispered, she had just come from the shower.

"No, sorry, I didn't mean to fall asleep, I was just checking on Joey, and we got to talk…" She eased her arm out from under Joey's head that lay sleeping on her side facing away from Ruby. "God… Charlie…"

Charlie turned around and saw Ruby's arm covered in blood. Ruby rolled Joey over and saw blood streaming from her nose. "God, I didn't feel it, I'm so sorry." Joey woke, "What's going on?" She lifted her hand to wipe her nose, she saw the blood.

"We got to get you to the hospital, you have bleed all over Ruby," Charlie threw on her clothes, she was shaking so badly she could barely button up her shorts. "Tara's here, she can take the kids, Ruby get the car and call Rachel, we'll be there as soon as we can."

* * *

Charlie loosened carefully her grip around Joey's hand. They had arrived the hospital, been received by Rachel who had rushed to get some test done. Joey's blood count was extremely low and that was the cause of her nosebleed. Now she was sleeping, hooked up to a bag of blood and one with some much needed intravenous nutrition.

Charlie stood up and left the room, she wanted to have a word with Rachel. She found her in the reception. "Charlie, how is she doing?" Rachel saw her and put down the file she was flipping through.

"She's sleeping, can we have a word?"

"Sure!" Rachel led the way to her office. "What do you want to talk about?" Rachel shot the door behind them and motioned for Charlie to sit down, she took the other chair.

"Rachel, how is she really doing? I'm not blind, I see how she looks… I carried her to the car today, I had no problem, she weighs next to nothing. The bleeding today…" Charlie was scared, more scared than what she cared to admit.

"Charlie, we have to postpone the next round of chemo, we have to get her blood count up first. I don't know what to say… She is skinny, she is weak, but she'll fight." Rachel placed her hand on her back, "You're worried?" It was more of a statement than a question.

"I am, she is so weak, sometimes I'm afraid that she'll give up. She is in so much pain and she doesn't manage to eat, I have to practically force her. She has mouth sores, as you know, and it makes it so painful to swallow, in addition to be queasy. I don't blame her, I'm sure I wouldn't want to eat either…" Charlie looked at Rachel. "She is not going to make it, is she?"

"Charlie, we're not giving up. She is weak, but she is not at the end. She'll fight!" Rachel tried to encourage her.

"No, we're not giving up, I won't let her. She is my everything…"

* * *

Leah walked into the hospital, Ruby had called her and told that Joey had been admitted. She was worried, Joey's condition had deteriorated fast over the last few weeks, and hearing that she was in hospital scared her. She asked a nurse for the room, and pushed the door open. She paused when she saw Joey lying in bed. She looked sicker than ever.

She walked over and put a hand on Joey's. Joey opened her eyes and her lips curled slightly when she saw her. "Leah, good to see you."

"Ruby called and told me, I was worried…" Leah struggled to hold her tears back. "Hey…" Joey saw her tears and lifted a hand to wipe them away. Leah sat down on the bed, facing her. "I love you girl."

Joey gave her a half smile. "I love you too Lea, and thank you for taking care of Tom, you do wonders for him."

"I love having him, I love him, he has become like a son to me and having him for almost a year, he has become like a brother to VJ, I hope he'll stay."

"Leah, I can never thank you enough for everything you have done, I have talked to Ruby, but I'll ask you too, please take care of Charlie for me. She'll need all of you…"

"Joey, you are not saying goodbye! You got to fight this!" Leah grabbed her hand with both of hers.

"Leah, I feel that my body is giving up on me. I don't want to, I just don't know where to take the strength from." Joey closed her eyes. She didn't know what to do, she searched for strength, but she couldn't find any. "Just promise me, whatever might happen, be there for them. It would be great to know that you'll be there for them, for Charlie and Tom."

"Of course I'll be there, but you can't leave us Joey, you can't you know that. I'll help you, support you, I'll do anything I can to help you through this!" Leah wiped tears away from her face.

"Thanks, I think I'll need it." She closed her eyes. Leah sat by her side and watched her. It seemed like she had given up. Leah tried to hold back her sobs. She couldn't face this, she leaned over her and kissed her cheek.

Joey smiled, "I love you Leah!"

"I love you too!" Leah squeezed her hand and left.

Leah walked into Rachel and Charlie in the corridor. Leah tried to avoid Charlie and luckily she headed straight for Joey's room with just a little hi.

"Rachel," Leah grabbed her elbow when she started to walk away.

"Yeah?" Rachel stopped and turned, she saw that Leah had been crying.

"Rachel, do you know that she is saying good bye?"

"No… Leah, she is really sick…" Rachel bit her lip. "If she feels like she need to…"

"Are you saying that she is dying?" Leah fought her tears.

"I'm saying that she is really sick, and right now, it's hard to say one way or the other." Rachel hated to say what she was saying, but it was the truth.

* * *

Joey opened her eyes when she heard the door open, she smiled a little when she saw Charlie coming in. She admired the beauty of her wife, "I'm one lucky woman!" She stretched out her hand to Charlie.

Charlie rushed over and took it, "I'm the lucky one!" She whispered, leaned over her and gently placed her lips against her.

"Can you hold me, I just want to feel you close."

Charlie got into bed with her, placed her arm under her head. Joey turned sideways and faced her. Charlie put her arm around her waist, and Joey placed her on top of Charlie's. "I love you Charlie, so much. You are my life."

"I love you too, I always will!" Charlie pulled her closed and kissed her on the head.

"Charlie, I just want you to be happy, you know, if I don't…"

"Joey, you are not saying that, I won't let you go." Charlie felt tears burning behind her eyes.

"Charlie, I'm not giving up, it's just that my body feels like it is. I fight as long as I can, with everything I have… But if… Let Ruby and Aden be there for you, think about the kids, they'll need you…"

"They need you too, I need you! Don't you dare thinking about leaving me, I won't let you, I love you too much!" Charlie had tears streaming down her face, she couldn't handle the thought losing her.

"I love you too…" Joey closed her eyes.


	60. Chapter 60

Lily slowly put down the phone, she looked around in the lobby. It was familiar, but still so strange, like she didn't belong there, like she didn't belong in this world. There was a few seating areas in the space. Large green plants, it was nice and tranquil. She had been there for a little more than four months. It was a beautiful place, Rachel had been right.

Nothing was able to give her peace of mind though. Her thoughts had settled in one track; Joey would die, it was her punishment. She looked down at the phone, she had just talked to Rachel. Her mind was suddenly silent, no voices screaming in her head. She walked to her room.

Slowly she sat down by her desk, found some paper and started to write. After a while she got up, found her bag in the bottom of her closet and found the bottle of vodka she had hid there. She sat down by the desk again, put the bottle to her mouth and drank.

---

Lily walked down to the mailbox just outside the retreat and put a letter in it. She turned and leaned against the box for a second, she took a deep breath and headed down towards the beach. Half way there, she took off the trail and headed for the cliffs. She sat down on the top, looking at the view, it was beautiful. She opened the little bag she was carrying, found the bottle and drank. "God, I hope there is forgiveness for this…" She said out loud, even though no one was there to hear her.

* * *

Charlie sat in Rachel's office, staring straight ahead, but not seeing a thing, her mind was occupied with the last ten weeks, it had been the longest ten weeks in her life. She felt tears starting to run down her cheeks. Joey had been so sick, in the end it was like a waiting game, waking to a new day, wondering if it would be the last.

It had taken the toll on everyone, Ruby had talked to Rachel i to get sick leave from work, she couldn't stand being away for most of the day, not knowing what happened at home. Joey had been in and out of hospital, mostly to get nutrition in her and to control her pain. It had been stressful and difficult, many times Charlie didn't know how to get through the days.

Ruby had been her greatest support, she was there day and night, often serving as a shoulder to cry on. Annie had been a great help too, taking care of the kids, but Ruby was the one she sought to. She lifted her hand to wipe away tears streaming down her face. Her hand was caught by the wrist, "Let me!"

* * *

Rachel looked at the paper she held in her hand, tears streaming down her face, seven months with uncertainty, fears, hardships and pain was over. This had been her hardest case so far in her career, it was medical difficult, but it was the personal side that really made it hard. Watching one of her best friends deteriorate into nothing, being in pain, unable to eat, vomiting and bleeding. So many times she hadn't been able to do anything about it, it was hard.

It was difficult to watch Charlie struggle with the possibility of losing her wife, trying to be strong for her at the same time. More than once had she been her shoulder to cry on after hours in the hospital, watching Joey squirm in pain, shiver in cold or being so exhausted that she didn't even have the strength to open her eyes.

She took a deep breath and headed for her office.

* * *

Charlie smiled at the touch of the hand, it was soft and warm, it felt good.

"It'll be ok, Rachel will be here any minute with the results."

Charlie opened her eyes and looked straight into golden brown eyes looking back at her. "This waiting is killing me Honey, I just need to know." She smiled and caught her hand, kissing the palm. "I love you so much, but if you need more chemo… I think both of us would…"

She looked at Joey, she was still fragile, but the four weeks since her last and final chemo had allowed her to gain a few kilos, and her 'cancer-face' was gone. She still had trouble walking on her own, but at least she got up. She was eating, the after effects from the chemo had slowly receded.

"I know, I didn't think I would make it, I have never felt so weak in my entire life. I didn't have anything to fight with…" Joey had a few tears running down her face, she had been scared, afraid of dying, afraid of leaving Charlie and her family.

Charlie moved her chair as close to Joey's as she could and put her arm around her. "You fought, and I'm grateful… what would I do without you?" Charlie put her hand under her chin and kissed her, both enjoying the feeling of the deep, full kiss. Something they had been unable to do for months because of the mouth sores Joey developed. They had disappeared a week earlier, and they did they best to make up for the time they couldn't do it.

They drew apart when they heard the door open and Rachel entered. They both studied her to see whether she had good or bad news.

"Well, I got the result from the test," She looked at the two nervous women sitting on the opposite side of the desk. "I guess I should just tell you…Joey, there are no signs of..."

Charlie jumped up, "are you sure?"

Rachel smiled and nodded, "Nothing, but you have to be back in two months for check-up, and it's not over yet, but this is good, it's really good!" She grinned, rose from her chair and hugged Charlie, who was standing, before sitting down next to Joey and pulled her into an embrace. "I'm so relieved, Joey, you made it, this far. Now you have time to get back your strength, gain weight. I'm always here for you, still." Rachel pulled back from the hug. "It's hard, psychological, to finish chemo, because that's what kept the cancer away, lot of people get's scared, unsecure… Whatever it is, I'm only a phone call away, ok?"

"Thank you for everything you have done for me Rachel, I don't think I would have made it without you." Joey gave her another hug. She was relieved beyond words, the thought of more chemo had scared her, she knew her body couldn't take more. Learning that the cancer was gone lifted a weight of her shoulders, she felt healthy, something she hadn't felt for more than a year.

Charlie knelt down in front of her. "I'm so relieved Honey, I was so scared that this day would never come." She had tears streaming down her cheeks. "I can't imagine life without you, and I don't have to!" She cupped Joey's face and kissed her, "Let's go and tell everybody!"

Charlie rose from the floor. "Rachel, I know we ask a lot from you, but could you let Lily know?" Rachel smiled and nodded, "No problem, I give the retreat a cal!"

* * *

Charlie had called everyone and asked them to come over, they were seated in the living room. It was like a déjà vu, Leah, Robert and VJ was there, Martha and Hugo, Rachel and Tony, Morag, Tom, Ruby and Aden, Tara and Nicole. The only difference was that Charlie was sitting on the couch with Joey between her legs, resting her back against her chest. She was still weak, and it was a very comfortable position.

Thirteen people were looking at them, every one of them remembering vividly the evening seven months earlier. They were all apprehensive about what they were going to be told this time.

"Look guys, I guess we should just tell you." Charlie paused, resting her chin on top of Joey's head. Everyone stared at her. "We were at the hospital for tests today. Rachel gave us the result… There's no sign of cancer!"

Everybody sighed from relief, tears was flowing, laughter spreading. Ruby was the first one to hug them, tears flowing freely down her cheeks, "I can't say how happy I am right now, god, when you told me to look after Charlie… I didn't think you would make it… Joey… I love you so much, and I'm indescribably happy. Thank God, this nightmare is over!"

Everyone took their turn, hugging and expressing their relief, it was draining. Joey turned her head and looked up at Charlie. "I'm sorry, this has been such a long day, I need to lay down, or I fall asleep right here!"

"Honey, you can sleep on me anytime, but I'll help you…"

"Here, let me," Aden interrupted them, he put his arms under Joey's knees and behind her back and lifted her.

"You don't have to carry me!" Joey laughed.

"I know, I just want to!" He gave her a kiss on the cheek. "I'm so happy, I'm going to have you around for a long time to come!"

---

"Guys, I don't want to ruin this moment," Charlie had followed Joey into the bedroom and Rachel took the opportunity to talk to the rest. "I just want to say, that even if she's cancer free now, this is going to be difficult, I'm sure Martha can tell how scary it is to get of the chemo. Even if it makes you sick, it is the stuff that keeps the cancer away. It can be very difficult to deal with, just so you all know, and don't be scared if she gets depressed or emotional over this… Let us just be here for her, for both of them and for each other!"

* * *

Charlie sat on the bed next to Joey, looking at her, it was only yesterday they had gotten the good news, now she had to break some bad to her. She placed her hand on her cheek, trying to wake her gently. "Honey, wake up." Joey stirred and opened her eyes, blinking a few times against the sun shining through the window.

"What time is it?" She was a little disoriented, she wasn't used to being waked, Charlie let her sleep until she woke by herself.

"It's only eight thirty, sorry to wake you Honey, but Rachel just called."

Joey was suddenly wide awake. "Is something wrong, is it something with the tests?" She felt herself panicking a little.

"No, not at all, this was something completely different." Charlie quickly settled her down. "It has nothing to do with that… It's Lily…" Charlie hesitated, they wasn't close to her, but she was Joey's mother. "Joey, honey… I'm so sorry…"

"What? Just tell me Charlie!" Joey saw that something was wrong and that Charlie tried to find a way to tell her.

"Joey… She disappeared from the retreat yesterday afternoon, they found her this morning… She is dead."

"Dead? Why… How?" Joey was confused, she didn't know what to feel.

"They found her at the bottom of some cliffs… They found a bag and an empty bottle of alcohol on the top…It looks like she jumped."

"Oh god… What are we going to tell Tara and Tom?" Joey placed a hand over her eyes. Charlie took it and lifted it away. "Look at me Honey, we'll deal with that, how are you feeling?"

Joey looked at her, hurt was shining through her eyes. "Do you remember when I told you about my father's death?"

Charlie nodded.

"My reaction then?"

Charlie nodded again.

"I can't help it… It's awful… I'm relieved…" Joey lifted her arms and put them around Charlie and pulled her down. "I know I ask this a lot," Joey whispered, "But can you hold me?"


	61. Chapter 61

**Sorry for the very long delay in updating this one, I have been sick, and haven't written that much. I hope this is worth the wait.**

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Charlie had called Leah to tell her to come over with Tom, Ruby had gotten Tara from upstairs and Brett and Annie came from next door. Charlie looked at Joey and Brett talking, they had shared the news with him earlier, both Joey and he struggled with their reaction.

Charlie walked over to them and put her arm around Joey's waist, she could feel her body trembling slightly. "Honey, I think you should sit down!" Charlie was concerned, Joey wasn't strong yet.

"She's right, Jo, and we have to focus on Tom and Tara, this is going to be hard on them!"Brett, leaned back on the counter. Annie came up beside him with Rebecha in her arms, Brett put an arm around her. "We can't think about what if now. There's only one thing that matters and that is Tom and Tara" Annie smiled at them.

"Hi, is something wrong, there's nothing going on with the tests?" Leah started to talk before she came in the door. She had been called in like this a few times too many, and she didn't like it.

"No, there's nothing about Joey, "Charlie reassured her and Tom."Tara is here, and we're waiting for you in the living room." Charlie let them walk in front of her. Brett and Annie was sitting on the floor with the kids, Ruby and Aden was sitting with them on the floor, helping to keep Jo and Jordan under control. Leah sat down in an armchair and Tom sat on the floor in front of her, Tara sat on the floor next to her brother. Charlie Joined Joey in the couch.

"Tara, Tom. We got a call from Rachel this morning. I'm so sorry, I had never dreamt it would come to this."Joey looked at her siblings."I don't know what to say, there has been so much shit the last year or so. Since we met you, life for you both has been tough."

"Yeah, but we have never been this happy before, we love staying here. You love us more than mum and dad." Tara looked at Tom that nodded, she spoke for both of them.

"Guy's, Rachel called, she talked to Lily yesterday, telling her that I'm ok. She went missing, they found her this morning." Joey paused.

Leah could sense what was coming, she put her hand on Tom's shoulder.

"I'm so sorry… She is dead." Joey watched her siblings reaction. Both of them stared at her in disbelief.

"What happened?" Tara was the first one to talk.

Joey looked at Charlie, not sure what to say. "She committed suicide." Charlie knew there was nothing to do, but tell them the truth. She rose and sat down beside Tara, who was clearly struggling with her emotions. She pulled her in for an embrace.

Tom stared into the floor, suddenly he jumped up and ran out.

"I should…" Leah motioned after Tom. "Yeah, and we'll talk later!" Charlie squeezed her hand before Leah got up and followed the boy.

Joey looked at the scene in front of her, she saw the distressed look on Tom's face before he jumps up and ran out. She saw Tara shaking in Charlie's arms, it broke her heart. She leaned her elbows on her knees, hiding her face in her hands. This was just too much, not even a day with good news before something bad happened again. The worst thing was that she wasn't sorry, she was angry and hurt, but she didn't feel grief. She wanted to scream, hit someone, she couldn't comprehend how her mother could do something like this.

Joey felt her heart beat faster and faster, she started hyperventilating. She got up from the couch and headed for the kitchen and the porch, she had a desperate need for air.

* * *

"Tom!" Leah knew that she had no chance catching up with the boy if he decided to take off. Tom continued to stride down the beach, but slowed down on his pace until he had stopped. Leah came up beside him. It felt a little strange for her, Tom was tall, she only reached him to his chest, and still he was a kid.

She put an arm around him, "Let's sit and talk." She spoke softly to him, nudging him to sit down beside her in the sand. She kept her arm around him, wanting to comfort him and give him time to get out of his tough teenager mode. For a long time they just sat there, Tom staring out on the sea, Leah rubbing him slowly over his back.

Finally he turned to her, "I feel so bad…" He lifted his hand and wiped away some tears that had escaped his eyes. Leah continued rubbing his back, waiting for him to continue.

"I love you more than I loved her!" He started to sob violently, burring his head in his arms. Leah didn't know what to say or do. On one hand she was delighted that she could mean so much to the boy that she loved like her own, on the other hands she hurt for him, realizing how terrible it had to be for him.

"Tom, she was your mother, you love me, but there's a different kind of love for our parents. That you love me, doesn't mean that you doesn't love her." Leah put a hand on his arm, wanting him to look at her.

"She never took care of me like you do," Tom turned his head and looked at her. "She never hugged me, or told me that she loved me, I was just there… I could just as well been a chair… and then… she let him beat me… She just looked when he tore the skin of my back… She didn't even report it to the police." He turned the whole body towards her.

"You took me home without even knowing me. You take care of me, you have given me a whole new family. How long did it take before you told me you loved me?" Tom looked at her intently.

"I don't remember…" Leah felt slightly overwhelmed.

"It took six days before you one morning ruffled my hair when I was sitting at the kitchen table, eating breakfast. You ruffled my hair and told me that you loved me, just like that, in the passing by, I don't even know if you knew that you said it… It took you six days to say something my mother couldn't say in sixteen years."

Leah looked at him, Tom had this tough teenager image, it wasn't often that he shared his feelings. Hearing him saying this was overwhelming, she got on her knees and embraced him, letting him burry his head in her shoulder. She let her fingers run through his sun streaked hair, wanting to comfort him, but not quite knowing how to.

"She was your mother Tom, she always will be, and even if she couldn't tell you, she loved you. I'm a mother, and you can't help but love your children. I'm sorry she never told you, or showed you, but I know that she did. She only wanted what's best for you, and she couldn't give you that herself. When it mattered, she let you go, and I just pray that I have been able to take care of the gift she gave me." Leah was crying, she had never liked Lily, but she was a mother like herself, and no matter what, leaving Joey and Brett must have been the hardest thing she had ever done, and in the end she had lost all her kids.

"Tom, Lily could have refused to let you stay with me… I think she saw, or hoped that I could give you something she couldn't…"

"You don't think she was mad at me, for wanting to stay with you when she offered me to move in with her?" Tom revealed that he was still a kid, even if he didn't look like one on the outside.

"Of course she wasn't angry with you, she loved you!" Leah let him go and sat back on her heels. "You're a good boy Tom, and your mother was proud of you!" She smiled at him.

"You really think so?" He looked more like he was ten than seventeen.

"I know so!" Leah had no problem stretching the truth for him. She didn't know so, but Lily ought to be, and Tom needed to hear it."Let's go home, I'll make you hot chocolate!" Leah rose and offered Tom her hand.

He smiled up at her and jumped to his feet,, "Sorry, I'm too big to hold hands with you, the other guys would talk." He gave her a grin, "but thank you for the offer!" He lifted her up and gave her a hug.

"You really are like a son to me, I just want you to know that, and I do love you!" Leah said after Tom had put her down.

"You really are like a mother to me, and I love you!" Tom gave her a sorrow filled smile and grabbed her hand anyway.

* * *

Ruby saw Joey stumbling into the kitchen, she jumped up from the floor and followed her, she caught her on the way out the door, heaving for air.

"Are you ok?" Ruby didn't like the look on Joey's face. Joey nodded and sat down in a chair, trying to get her breathing under control. Ruby sat down beside her, putting a hand on her back.

"I just don't get how she could do this." Joey stared out over the water. "It's like we never get a break, we are happy for a while and then something happens that destroys it..."

"I know there's been a lot of shit, but if you look at the big picture, Joey, you're happy. You and Charlie are happy together!" Ruby tried to comfort her, making her focus on all the good things. She hated Lily for doing what she had done. Joey was right, it seemed like they never got a break, and this was the last thing they needed after seven months with Joey being sick.

"I want to be here for Tom and Tara, and I don't have the strength…" Joey rubbed her face with her hands, she was tired, the emotional stress was taking its toll on her.

"Joey, you're here, that's all we need. We know that you will be here, that you are fragile still, it doesn't matter, you're here!" Ruby rested her hand on her neck, using her thumb to stroke her skin. "There were so many times I was afraid that we would lose you… God, the time you told me to look after Charlie, I've never been so scared in my whole life. You're here Joey, you can take care of Charlie yourself, the kids, your siblings and me and Aden. But now, it's us taking care of you, and we'll take care of Tara and Tom!" Ruby smiled at her, "They can throw anything at us, nothing can destroy the Bucktons!"

"You're such a good sister Ruby." Joey tilted her head sideways and looked at her. "Thank you for taking care of me!" She gave her a little grin.

"Well, I have a great sister, don't I?"

* * *

Charlie was sitting on the floor in the living room, Brett, Annie and Aden had taken the kids out side. She was worried about Joey, but she had seen Ruby going after her, so she focused on Tara sitting next to her. She had her knees under her chin, her arms around her legs, the way she would always sit when she found something difficult. Charlie had an arm around her shoulders, holding her tight.

"What are you thinking?" Charlie carefully tried to get her to talk.

"I don't know…"Tara glanced at her, "I guess I always had a little hope that she one day would accept me, and love me for who I am… that will never happen now…" Some tears escaped from her eyes. Charlie understood her feelings, her own dad had accepted her and that had meant the world to her.

"I guess I just wanted her to love me…" Tara broke down and cried, Charlie pulled her over so she was resting her head on her shoulder.

"Tara, she loved you, she just couldn't see through the delusion. I know she tried, and the last few months before Joey got sick, you were having a good time with her."

"Yeah, but we never mentioned the fact that I'm gay, I was just glad, I didn't want any hassle… I just wish she loved all of me…"

"I know honey, I know." Charlie pressed her lips to her temple, slowly rocking her. Her thoughts went to Lily, wondering why she had ended it after hearing that Joey was ok. Maybe she could understand if Joey hadn't made it, she herself would have struggled to find reasons to continue. That Lily would do it after the good news, that didn't make sense


	62. Chapter 62

Charlie looked at the thick envelope she held in her hands, there was only one person who could have sent it. Charlie leaned up against the door, looking at Joey sitting by the kitchen table, enjoying a very early morning coffee. She looked back at the letter, trying to decide what would be the right thing to do. It was from Lily, she knew it, and she dreaded to learn what she had written.

Joey looked up at her and saw the expression in her face. "What's wrong?" She got up from the chair and walked over to her. Charlie put an arm around her and kissed her on the side of the head.

"This came," Charlie showed her the letter. Joey took it from her hand and looked at it. "It's from Lily… I guess it's common to leave a letter… Well, we should just read it…"

"Are you sure, I don't know if she'll be any nicer in that letter than what she was the last time we spoke." Charlie was concerned, she didn't want Joey to get upset. Yesterday had been hard on her, and more of the same wouldn't be good.

"I don't think we can ignore it, this is her last words…" Joey dreaded the letter just as much as Charlie did, but at the same time she needed to know what she had said as her last words. They walked into the living room and sat down on the couch together. The house was quiet, the kids still sleeping.

"Do you want to read, or should I?" Charlie placed their coffee cups on the table in front of them.

"I'll do it," Joey pulled her feet up on the couch and snuggled up to Charlie's side, with shaking hands she opened the envelope and pulled out the papers inside. She took a deep breath and started to read.

_Dear Joey_

_I address this to you, but it is for all of you. I just got the good news from Rachel. I'm so glad to hear that your well again, I hope that nothing ever happens that will harm you again. _

_There are so many wrongs I have done by you Joey, I can never make amends for them. I left you, even if I saw it as my only way to survive, I should have taken you with me, I shouldn't have left you and deprived you of your childhood. _

_The amazing thing is that you have grown to be a wonderful young lady, and I hate myself for missing out of your life._

_I think I'm destroyed. I can't control my thoughts, I have a hundred voices screaming in my head, and I never know which one is going to win. I have said terrible things to you and Charlie, the worst is that I don't know if I mean them or not. That's why I write this letter to you now, I can control what I write, and I can think of how much I love you and your siblings. _

_I can never say how sorry I am. I was thinking that you would die, that it was… you know what I thought. When Rachel called me today, all the voices in my head got quiet. I have been so wrong about everything. This proves it, I was convinced that you would die, you didn't. _

_I'm so glad that you made it through, you're young and have a whole life in front of you. The only thing I can do is to beg for forgiveness and tell you that I was so wrong. You have a wonderful wife in Charlie, she really cares for you, and I know she will always protect you. I'm sorry I never accepted you, I was just so confused. Another part was scared because I have never seen a happy marriage, and I was scared that you would be hurt. I have only known marriage like the one I had with your father, a marriage that almost killed me. My marriage to Tom and Tara's father was never a happy one either, we just existed. _

_I have destroyed the four most important people in my life, I lost them and I don't deserve anything else. I have never been fit to take care of anyone. You all are still the pride of my life, the only good thing that has come out of it._

_By the time you got this letter, you know I'm not here anymore. I believe that I go to a better place, and I know if I stay here, I will only cause more grief. I can't seem to get out of my thought patterns. I've been in this place four months and nothing has changed. I want to leave you with some final words, good words. Words that shows what I really think, but can't express, they are so deep buried._

_I feel I can reach those thoughts now, my head is still._

_Brett: My first born, the sweet little boy I held in my arms so many years ago. I was so scared, I wanted to give you a good life, I failed miserably. You were such a headstrong little boy, but I could see that your father slowly turned you into him, even at that age. I left you, and condemned you to be like him. I know all you wanted to was to please your father. I should have taken you both, maybe I couldn't give you a perfect life, but I could have given you a better one. _

_When I met you again, I was thrilled and at the same time my heart broke, because I could see what you had become. I'm so proud of you, that you have turned your life around. That you have found someone that loves you, and now you have a family of your own, and I know you will be a wonderful father to all you children. _

_I'm glad that you and Joey has found back to each other, take care of her! I love you so much, and I wish you everything good in your life._

_Joey: when you was born, I was terrified. I knew I couldn't take care of you and protect you. It was a wonder that you was born at all, your father bashed me several times during the pregnancy and I was sure more than once that he had killed you. You held on, and you was born healthy and strong. _

_The hardest decision I ever made was leaving you, I just didn't see any other way. I closed my eyes to reality, I ignored the fact that I knew he would probably turn on you. Charlie and you were right, it's not an excuse to be young, I should have checked on you._

_I can never express how sorry I am for all the hardship you have gone through, all I can say is that some good things has come out of it. You have a family, a wife that loves you, kids and friends. I know you are happy, and you deserve to be. I just wish I could share it with you._

_I'm so proud of you baby, I love you more than I have words to say. I wish I could be the mother you deserve, but I know I can't._

_I know you wonder why I chose to end it now, when everything was looking brighter. Joey, I know I can't be the one I want to be, I don't want to hurt you anymore. If I stay, I'll go back to my old ways, and I don't want that. I hope the words in this letter can show you who I want to be and that you can let this be what you remember of me. Not all the terrible things that I've said, but the fact that I do love you more than life itself._

_Tara: I can't remember if I ever told you that I loved you, I do. It was hard, you look so much like Joey, and I pushed you away for that reason. You made me think of her and the terrible thing I had done. You are so sweet, and I wish I had taken better care of you. I gave you a roof over your head and food, but I didn't give you love. _

_I couldn't, I didn't know how to. I was falling apart on the inside, guilt ridden. If I wanted to hug you, I thought of the two kids I would never hug again. I'm so sorry Tara, you deserve so much better._

_I know you are happy with Joey and Charlie, and I'm glad that you finally found a place where you feel you belong. _

_I just want to tell you that I love you, it doesn't matter who you love, I just hope that you are happy. I know your life will be hard, but I was the one that made it most difficult for you. I wish I could have supported you, told you that it is ok. You will meet so much hardship on your way, and you shouldn't have to meet most of it from me. _

_So my final words to you is that I love you dearly. I'm proud of you and I accept you for who you are. I wish you all happiness in your life, and I ask you to forgive me for not being the mother you deserve._

_Tom: You are such a good boy! You are not like any of the men I know, and I wondered how you got to be like that. So caring and understanding, patient and loving. I'm sorry for never loving you the way you deserve, I never hugged you or told you that I loved you. I did, but you were so small, you can't remember. When I held you in my arms as a baby, looking into your perfect little face, I run my finger over your nose and told you that I loved you beyond words. _

_I never told you when it mattered though, but I did love you. I'm so sorry that I let your father beat you, but maybe something good came out of even that. I know you are happy at Leah's and to be so close to your siblings. Don't ever feel bad for feeling good. You have grown into such a great young man, any girl will be lucky to have you. _

_Tom, I love you so much, and for you too, I wished I could be the mother you deserve, but I can't. Just remember, I love you and are so proud of you!_

_Charlie: We have never hit it off, and it's completely my fault. I have hurt you so much with the words I have said. I'll say that I'm sorry, but I understand if you never find it in your heart to forgive. I will still ask you to though, not for my sake, but for yourself._

_You are such a strong woman, and you do anything to protect those you love. Joey couldn't have found anyone better than you. I leave this world with peace in mind knowing that you will take care of her. You are the woman I wish I could be, if I had just a fraction of your strength and integrity I wouldn't be here today. But then, maybe none of us would, and I know that you and Joey are meant for each other, and maybe this was the way to get you together. _

_Love your kids Charlie, I know you do, Love Joey and I ask you to love Tara and Tom too, they need you in their life to be an example to follow. If they grow up to be like you, I'll be a very happy woman.  
I wish I knew you, I love you for who you are to Joey and for who you are for Tom and Tara, and I rest in peace, knowing that you'll protect our family._

_Leah: I know you never liked me, I don't blame you, I didn't like you either. I just want to ask you to take good care of Tom, and be the mother for him that I could never be. He is a good kid and he deserves to be happy. I could see that he is really happy staying with you and that's all I want, for him to be happy. _

_I'm sorry for all the grief I have caused you. I know that you are Joey's mother of choice, and I don't think she could have chosen anyone better. I hope that one day you can look at me with lighter eyes. I don't have any excuses, and there's nothing I can do to make amends. _

_It's much to ask, but I will anyway; Take care of my children._

_-  
_

_If I thought I could become the woman I want to be, I wouldn't do this. You all have had such a hard time with Joey's illness, and it's not that I want to add to your burdens. I can't be the one I want to be, I'm too messed up, I don't want to push you further away, hurt you more. If I stay, I will, I know that. So I decide to end it now, and like I said with these words try and leave something good behind._

_Finally I have one request. I don't want to be buried, I want to be cremated and my ashes spread. My whole life I have been crammed into this box, unable to get out, I'm about to be free now, and I want to be free both spirit and body. I'm sure you'll find a place where my ashes will blow away with the wind. _

_Don't be sad for me, this is the best thing I can do. I want this, to find peace, to go home. I don't want to finish this letter, because finally I tell you what I really feel. I know though, that in real life this won't continue. _

_I love you all very much and one day we'll meet again. Until then take care of each other and love each other._

_I love you all more than life._

_ Lily_

Joey lifted her head and looked at the people gathered. They was standing near the place where Jack had been buried years ago, out on the cliffs. Everybody was overwhelmed by Lily's letter, Tara was standing in Nicole's arms holding the urn, Tom was standing between Leah and VJ, Brett and Annie had their arms wrapped around each other. Charlie was standing beside Joey her arms around her waist.

The weather was beautiful, the sun shining and a gentle breeze blowing. They were standing in a half circle, tears running, all of them wishing it didn't have to come to this for Lily to be the one she really was.

Tara stepped out to edge of the cliff, opened the urn and let the wind carry the ashes away.


End file.
